Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
Re: Registry!
https://freebies-for-baby.com/3387/5-free-diaper-bags-filled-with-free-baby-samples/
If this is a foreign concept for you, a sleep sack is a wearable blanket that's safer for baby because it won't get caught over their face (lower risk of SIDS). When we were living up north, I felt even better knowing that DD wouldn't kick off her blanket in the middle of the night and get too cold, either.
Some have sleeves
Some don't have sleeves
DD #2: EDD July 2016
This is the one we will be using
Eta: I'm not asking Aunt Judy to adult for me and my husband.
A lot of friends are giving us bigger items like strollers and we bought a carseat with a BRU gift card already, so I'm mostly using the registry for cute stuff that people like to gift and stuff I will buy myself with the completion discount.
Target: I used this for my first pregnancy (and our wedding) and had zero issues. That being said, there is a feature where you can click on online only or in-store items, and it will eliminate the ones that you don't want (like if you only want to register for items in the store, so people don't have to go online). There are 5 Targets in my area, and most of them have different items in them, so sometimes if you register for something that is in the store next to you, it won't be carried in the store that is next to that store. Most people don't know about that little feature on the website. I did a bulk of the registering online (for items that were in-store), and then I went into the store to register for the smaller items and get the goodie bag.
BRU: I also used BRU for my first registry, and there were a few issues. One being that their return policy is pretty dang awful. If you go onto their FB page, and look at the posts done by other people on issue they have (not only with small things, but not receiving pieces of furniture, getting charged double, not being able to return damaged items, etc), its pretty bad. There are anywhere from 3-5+ post a day, from unhappy customers. I was going to go with them for some of the larger items because they do the Trade-In event, and I had a few things to trade in, but I have been seeing posts (from BRU) being left on other people's comments asking when the date is of the Trade-In event, and they are saying they have no immediate plans for one in the future. That sucks, because I feel that was a really good deal that they had going on. At this point, for the larger items, their coupons really don't give that much off compared to other stores. So, really no incentive to buy from there. Especially when they have a coupon, but then down at the bottom is says "Exclusions" and it lists half the store.
Mostly for this kid, I have lists going on Target, BRU, and Amazon, and I will just be bouncing between them waiting to see if there are any price drops or anything, and buy from the cheapest place.
There is a big difference between someone just offering to help out, or make a meal.....and someone requesting that people do that for them. I have absolutely no problem with making a new mom a meal, or offering to take the other kids out of the house for a bit, or whatever. But if they make a registry for it and downright ask for it....they just get an eyeroll out of me.
With DS I registered at Babies R Us (BRU), Buy buy baby (BBB), and Amazon. I wanted to only do Amazon but members of my family complained, so I added BBB. Well, BBB isn't in as many cities, or as easy to get to apparently as BRU, so at yet again more complaints I made a third registry there lol.
That being said, BRU is definitely the place I would recommend all moms register at, for a number of reasons:
- BRU's money back for items purchased off registries is awesome, absolutely awesome. I have friends from my last BMB that got $100+ dollars as a gift card after the baby was born.
- Price matching. Need I say more?
- Discount matching: they accept BBBs 20% off coupons.
- BRU stores are just more prevalent than BBB so easier for family/friends who live far away to shop at (for those that MUST shop in a box store)
BBB has some perks. I actually prefer it as a store. For the most part, they are much nicer and cleaner. They have a better selection of items with more high-end options and their nursing/changing rooms can't be matched (soft lights, noise machines, comfy couches and chairs, etc). Also, as another PP mentioned, we ended up having to return our monitor to the manufacturer because it broke. Unfortunately, we no longer had the receipt and the monitor was only covered under warranty if we could find proof and date of purchase. Thankfully, BBB keeps all that information for every single item purchased off your registry. My local BBB very helpfully printed the registry, highlighted the purchase and purchase date, scanned, and emailed me a copy so that I could send it off to the manufacturer. I've heard BRU does not do this for their registries.My personal must-haves/should register fors:
- Medela "Tender Care" Lanolin - This was THE BEST nipple soother I used. I tried using breastmilk, coconut oil, lansinoh lanolin, and earth mama nipple butter and this one was by far the best. It's a thinner consistency than many of the other types so it didn't hurt to apply. I used it every nursing session for the first week or two.
- Medela HydroGel Pads - Ahhhhh, stick them in the fridge and soothe your sore nips with cool gel pads for that first one to two weeks. They are amazing at helping with the healing process.
- Nursing pads - I didn't have a brand preference here. I used Medela, Ameda, and Lansinoh. None of them really stuck out as better to me. However, I used nursing pads for a very limited time. Some women will need them for a much longer time. I just RARELY leaked and for the most part only in the beginning.
- Pumping parts - I returned to work and pumped until DS was 1. If you plan on pumping you'll need replacement parts for your pump. This includes membranes, tubing, and flanges.
I don't have any tips on bottles because we got lucky and DS had no issues with the 100000 medela bottles we got from our breastpump kit, the hospital, and the replacement part kits. He used Medela bottles with a (SLOW) nipple until his last bottle at 12 months.DS: EDD, December 19th, 2014. Born, December 19th, 2014!
DD: EDD, July 18th, 2016. Born, July 19th, 2016!
Baby #3: EDD, April 16th, 2016
I'm a FTM, and so far I've only added basic gender-neutral items (don't know what the sex is yet). Things like stroller, car seat, crib, mattress, pack n play, high chair, etc. Those big ticket items we plan to keep neutral so we can use them with future babies. Once we know the gender, I'll go back and add girl or boy colors for all the small stuff like sheets, blankets, toys, etc. Also, I've registered for a TON of books! Which is great because those won't really depend on gender either.
In case anyone is curious, the big ticket items that we're keep gender neutral are the UppaBaby Vista stroller, Maxi Cosi Pria 70 convertible car seat, 4 Moms Breeze (pack n play) and the Delta Tribeca 4-in-1 crib.
to fetch out the crusty boogers
Fisher-Price Booster Seat
we lived in a small apartment and this was awesome in lieu of a bulky highchair. DD still uses this at 3 years old. Great value! I've even traveled with it in luggage (the seat back folds down).
Pacifier Holder
DD would ONLY take the Soothie pacifiers (the kind pictured) and most pacifier holders wouldn't work. These were great.
Munchkin fresh food feeders
Depends on your feeding philosophy but we used these with DD to introduce food and also make sure she didn't choke (obviously this is not for a newborn :P) Some folks go straight to letting the kid put pieces of food in their mouth. The term is escaping me... obviously we weren't in that camp.
iPlay sun hat
nothing makes me more mad than seeing parents in hats/sunglasses out with a baby with no sun protection. Put a hat on your baby! These come in lots of different styles and cute patterns.