Hi guys,
I'm pregnant with my first, due June 2016. I know I have ways to go still, but all I can think about, 24/7 is the birth. I consumes my mind, and stresses me out so much. I feel like I cannot enjoy my pregnancy. I am going back and forth between a natural birth or getting the epidural. I know each has pros and cons. I will be giving birth in a hospital. My absolute biggest fear is that I might have to be cut. I cannot even fathom this. My doctor says the need for it can be 50-50 (which I think seems high, but who am I). But he is a very good doctor and I do trust him. I have done a lot of research and his reviews are amazing. I have changed doctors twice since before getting pregnant bc of their opinions regarding certain birthing situations. I don't think changing doctors again will make any difference. They all seem to have some opinion that I disagree with. I guess as a doctor in the medical field, this is what they are taught to follow. Anyway, I would love to hear some birth stories with and without medication. Also, I am very interested to know if anybody went through with a natural birth but ended up wishing they got the epidural. Thanks ladies
Re: Natural birth vs. epidural - stories, regrets, etc
There is no other medical situation ever where people turn down pain relief because they want to experience it naturally (ever heard of someone embracing an unmedicated migraine? Didn't think so). Just my 2 cents
ETA: I was induced, did 30hrs of labor (half unmediated) and we tried everything from getting in the bathtub to forceps. I ended up with an emergency CS, but no regrets!
DS2 5-18-2014
DD1 EDD 6-21-2016
My plan going in is no epidural for as long as I can stand it only because epidurals do slow labor progression and I want to avoid pitocin or a csection due to labor not progressing. Other than that, I am okay with whatever they need to do to get the baby out safely, even if it means a cesarean.
***Trigger Warning: loss - my cousin opted out of a csection because she wanted a natural labor. I don't know the whole story because she doesn't like to talk about it but from what I know, her baby ended up losing his oxygen supply and dying in utero during labor. To me, THAT is my absolute biggest fear. It's rare but it does happen, even in hospitals **
In response to OP... I used the self meditation that I practiced over the years while trying to manage migraine pain and applied that during labor and had an amazing med free birth with my first. It's possible and doable but I would suggest to anyone looking at a med free birth, to take the natural birthing classes and practice those methods daily prior to going into labor. You can do it without the preparation but I would imagine it would be much harder.
Ultimately the most important thing is that you and baby are safe and your dr is there to ensure that happens. As other PP have mentioned, you can have a plan but please try to be open minded.
DS2 5-18-2014
DD1 EDD 6-21-2016
With my son I went into labor after dinner at it lasted 17 hours. After 12 hours I was so sick and my progression had stalled. I got the epi, and he came with only 10 minutes of pushing a few hors later. No cut, but a small rip.
With dd my labor was only 3 hours. By the time I showered, we dropped off my son, and got to the hospital I was 8-9 cm dilated. We were in the hospital less than 30 minutes before she was born. No cut, very, very small rip and the fastest physical recovery I could imagine.
Both very different, but good experiences with the end result of happy healthy baby at the end. My advice would be allow yourself to be flexible. Don't set yourself up to be disappointed if you need an epi but hasn't planed on it, or the other way around. Be informed, have a plan, and be ready to listen to your body and change the plan as necessary.
I too have heard episiotomies were no longer standard - and tearing naturally was (in most cases) the preferred scenario? but seriously - I don't even know where I read/heard that.
I could be totally wrong, I'm going off my high school health teacher in our childbirth unit. Essentially took a sheet of paper and tore it against the grain on one side and snipped it with scissors on the other and said "ladies, which would you prefer, which do you think is easier to repair?". Very simple demonstration but I remember it clear as day 10 years later.
And, OP - ditto to everyone else. Go in with an open mind. If you decide you would like to have a natural birth - I'd suggest preparing for it by taking pre-natal classes focused on natural child birth. And agree with a pp that if you are adamant one way or another about episiotomies to tell your doctor up front so he/she can accommodate your wishes.
I've had both types of labours - medicated and unmediated. I preferred the latter for a variety of reasons - and didn't regret not having the epidural (unless you asked me when I was about 7cm dialated and going through transition... )
Try not to stress too much about the birth just yet - do your research - know that you have lots of time to come to terms with a birth plan and most importantly remember that an open mind is the most important tool you can have in planning right now
I too have heard episiotomies were no longer standard - and tearing naturally was (in most cases) the preferred scenario? but seriously - I don't even know where I read/heard that.
Tearing is actually preferred because your body will naturally tear at the weakest point so it will heal easier. It will also only tear as much as needed. I know there are horror stories of really bad tears but those are the exception and not the rule. There are tons of studies to back this up and most doctors won't do an episiotomy anymore.I really wanted to avoid an epidural for a number of reasons, none of which included trying to be a "hero" or thinking I deserve a medal or whatever. I know no one here has said that yet, but those arguments really bug me. I wanted to be able to move around during labor and try different birthing positions, I didn't want the added risks of punctured dura or the chance that it would only work on half of my body, I didn't want the risk of added recovery time or spinal headache after birth, I didn't want the risk of it slowing my labor, and I also just feel more comfortable when I can feel my body and be present. I know plenty of people have had great experiences and no problems with epidurals, but for me the benefits don't outweigh the risks.
I didn't have any pain medication with DS and while it was probably the most intense experience of my life, I felt amazing after he was born and I was really glad I had the freedom of movement the whole time and could get up right after.
ETA- Sorry if that seems kind of ranty lol
Third time mom here. The best advice I can give is to educate yourself but not to hold too tightly to any expectations. Take it as it comes and do what's best for your and baby's health and well-being. Stay on the curious side and don't go to fear. When our bodies are in a state of fear, we release stress hormones that make the process more difficult. Though, do expect that it's going to hurt and that you can do it.
All this said, I had two pain-med free, complication free, intervention free births when I thought, without a doubt, I would want an epidural the minute I was in the door. Didn't happen. I can't help but think I can do it again. But I don't know what this birth or baby will bring to the table. So, I'm working to just take it as it comes instead of holding tightly to the idea that this will be like the first two.
Oh I didn't mean 'not be a hero' in that sense @courtjack. I used that 100% for myself and my expectations for myself. I think whatever each person chooses is right for them, like many things in life, no one should ever judge what people choose to do for themselves, just to always be prepared that things can/may change:)
This post makes me snarky, but I will do my best to refrain from that.
With my first, I didn't have much of a plan going into my induction at 40+2. I was totally going to go with the flow and see where labor took me. During the first doctor check, after the pit started working and the contractions started rolling, my doctor calmly asked if I was ready for the epidural. I meekly answered, "yes please." All the deep breathing and mediation in the world weren't going to take that pain away. Contractions hurt like a motherfuc*er. So I labored for awhile, the doc broke my water, and then the fun really started. My blood pressure plummeted, I was put on oxygen, and the baby's heartbeat was dropping with every contraction. I never made it past 7 cm. My doctor called for an emergency c section. Turns out baby was sunny side up, and the cord was wrapped around baby's neck and cutting off blood/oxygen supply with every contraction. If I had resisted, I wouldn't have a healthy 2.5 year old today.
So, like everyone else said, keep an open mind and be willing to do WHATEVER it takes to get your beautiful baby into this world safely. And there's no need to be a martyr. Epidurals are the jam.
I think that's what I meant to? lol. I meant 'not being a hero' was never an argument I liked. Opting for no epidural had nothing to do with thinking I deserved a medal.
Man maybe my brain is fried today - I really did mean to agree with you. lol.
Personally I would like to be pumped with so many drugs I won't know what year it is or who the president is!!!!
Best advice ever: start taking metamucil before yoh go into labour.... no one told me that and you so wish you had started earlier (and not three days after)
When I had my DS, I had to be induced because at 40+1, I wasn't dilated at all. At our hospital, with FTM, they "ripen the cervix" the night before inducing. So I went in at 9:00 to get the medication to ripen the cervix with the plan to take Pitocin the next morning. Within an hour of ripening my cervix, I started having the worst contractions and was in the worst pain ever! I knew I wanted to do an epidural but kept thinking it was too early. So I waited. I finally couldn't wait any longer and got the epidural. It turned out that they didn't have to induce me because the other medication put me into labor. I was only in labor for three hours but then pushed for three hours. I couldn't really feel my legs but I still felt the pressure of the contractions and pushing the baby out. I know that I tore, but the doctor never told me much about it which was probably for the best.
I knew that I wanted an epidural, so I wasn't freaked out about the birth as much as I was about after the epidural wore off! I was so scared that the pain would be so bad for so long. It wasn't even close to as bad as I expected. I think that focus is so much on the baby, you don't focus as much on the rest. At least that was the case with me. In reality, I've had knew surgeries that were way worse than childbirth, but I had the epidural!
I was induced at 40w+6d so that the right anesthesiologist could be there to tend to my pain needs. At that point, the epidural was still on the table.
Spoiler alert: As it turns out, I can't have an epidural because I don't have any epidural space in my spine anymore. I found out that bit of news from the Head of Anesthesiology WHEN I WAS IN LABOR.
I was in labor for 23 hours, and stuck at 9 cm for 3 hours before I tapped out and had a c-section (they were able to place a spinal, so I was awake and my husband was present). Pitocin + a "sunny side up" baby just made giving birth naturally nearly impossible for me.
Moral of my story: I'm just going to go with a repeat c-section this time around.
Unmedicated Birth".
DST T4L