Wow! I personally think everyone has been really mean to you in their responses! I personally don't get annoyed about multiples of the same topic, and think EVERYONE should be able to start their own threads for whatever they want. This kind of makes me question whether certain people are actually nice, or are on some kind of high horse.
I totally agree. One said "if you don't like the way we do things, find a different message board". Really?????? Also, the other day there was a post that a girl was 6 weeks and wondered if the flutter she felt could be the baby. People were SOOOOO rude, I know she must have felt stupid. I felt sorry for her. Someone even said "Congrats on your fart baby". Geeeeeez people, we r all grown WOMEN here, not teenage brats. BE NICE!
That was me!! Thanks so much for the shout out on my fart baby comment!!! :-D
Online forum means that the intended tone/emotion is not always conveyed with the message. Just because it's taken as rude or nasty does not mean it was intended to be rude or nasty. If you think something is out of line, re-read the post and make sure that you are not making it out to be something that it's not.
This. I think everyone on The Bump should have to start over on TTGP. Where you learn all about common sense, science and a sense of humor. It's like a prep course for pregnancy. I also think some people just stumble into TB and treat it like a diary, when it's really an established group of women who have taken the time to get to know each other and the community as a whole.
I'm out.
Hmmm, did not realize most people already knew each other! I was not actually TTGP, so that wouldn't have been possible for me.
I do feel though, that I have common sense, intelligence, experience (4 pregnancies, 1 miscarriage, 3 babies, c-sections, experience having babies with multiple OBs and at different hospitals,) and that these things would make me a valued asset to the boards. I consider the fact that I don't put others down, even if they don't seem as smart or experienced as me, to be a positive. I can't change how someone else responds to posts, but I can at least show kindness myself.
Light-hearted snark is totally different than bullying. I dislike when that word is used without carefully considering what it means. Nobody here is bullying anyone. If you look at the threads where women disclose that they've miscarried, or they need support dealing with something hard-EVERYONE here is incredibly supportive and caring. I have been part of a number of boards - and this group of ladies is far more tolerant than other groups I've been a part of.
This. I think everyone on The Bump should have to start over on TTGP. Where you learn all about common sense, science and a sense of humor. It's like a prep course for pregnancy. I also think some people just stumble into TB and treat it like a diary, when it's really an established group of women who have taken the time to get to know each other and the community as a whole.
Hmmm, did not realize most people already knew each other! I was not actually TTGP, so that wouldn't have been possible for me.
I do feel though, that I have common sense, intelligence, experience (4 pregnancies, 1 miscarriage, 3 babies, c-sections, experience having babies with multiple OBs and at different hospitals,) and that these things would make me a valued asset to the boards. I consider the fact that I don't put others down, even if they don't seem as smart or experienced as me, to be a positive. I can't change how someone else responds to posts, but I can at least show kindness myself.
---------------------------------
QBF.
But it still would have been possible for you (general you) to lurk a bit to get a feel for the community. Good for you on your experience. Those are very valuable when contributing in an online forum where others may have questions. I'm a first time mom and have never been pregnant, so I value the experience of others.
That wasn't the point of this post though. The point of this post stemmed from a large majority of women on this board trying to generate some organization. Apparently others took that as lack of sympathy or being rude, which it was not intended to be. I'm going to chalk it up to difference of opinion and personality. Oh well.
The majority of the women who contribute here are very kind and offer an amazing support system when it is needed. I wouldn't be so quick to judge based on a multiple threads posted about the same symptom, or lack of symptoms, etc. Maybe take a look at the other posts where we're genuinely trying to get to know each other (the GTKY threads, daily threads, etc) or the support offered to those who are suffering a loss.
Light-hearted snark is totally different than bullying. I dislike when that word is used without carefully considering what it means. Nobody here is bullying anyone. If you look at the threads where women disclose that they've miscarried, or they need support dealing with something hard-EVERYONE here is incredibly supportive and caring. I have been part of a number of boards - and this group of ladies is far more tolerant than other groups I've been a part of.
This. I think everyone on The Bump should have to start over on TTGP. Where you learn all about common sense, science and a sense of humor. It's like a prep course for pregnancy. I also think some people just stumble into TB and treat it like a diary, when it's really an established group of women who have taken the time to get to know each other and the community as a whole.
I'm out.
I wasn't on the TTGP page. Does this mean you are bullying me off TB community?!?!?! JK
I get that now, that lurking to get a taste of the community, makes sense. However, I was under the false impression that there was no established community, and that this was a NEW community of ladies due in June that was just forming. My line of thinking made sense, in that this specific board is new in its existence. As you pointed out though, most ladies know each other from the TTGP. But from what I previously thought, lurking would have been unneeded.
@june2016baby , I thought the same thing. I did not realize there were people on this specific board who were not expecting in June 2016 and I definitely did not realize there was an established group and way of doing things. Seems counterintuitive to the group name but it is a public forum so I guess you could be a 70 year old man and still an "established member" of the June 2016 birth club group. Cheers to 9 months of raging hormones and thick skin.
@june2016baby , I thought the same thing. I did not realize there were people on this specific board who were not expecting in June 2016 and I definitely did not realize there was an established group and way of doing things. Seems counterintuitive to the group name but it is a public forum so I guess you could be a 70 year old man and still an "established member" of the June 2016 birth club group. Cheers to 9 months of raging hormones and thick skin.
Unless I missed something, there isn't anyone on this board who isn't expecting in June 2016. That's why we're all here. I'm not going to get butthurt over the recurring comments and fact that this is still going, so we'll agree to disagree
I feel like this convo went really well UNTIL someone posted how "'mean" everyone was. It's always the post stirrers who cry foul the loudest. I wasn't a fan of the daily symptoms thread, I think this board moves slow so it's not an issue that needs to be addressed. However most people felt differently so that's fine! Who cares lol. Go with the flow.
@june2016baby , I thought the same thing. I did not realize there were people on this specific board who were not expecting in June 2016 and I definitely did not realize there was an established group and way of doing things. Seems counterintuitive to the group name but it is a public forum so I guess you could be a 70 year old man and still an "established member" of the June 2016 birth club group. Cheers to 9 months of raging hormones and thick skin.
Unless I missed something, there isn't anyone on this board who isn't expecting in June 2016. That's why we're all here. I'm not going to get butthurt over the recurring comments and fact that this is still going, so we'll agree to disagree
Woah, back up. Who are these "established members" of June 16 that aren't actually due in June 16?
@june2016baby , I thought the same thing. I did not realize there were people on this specific board who were not expecting in June 2016 and I definitely did not realize there was an established group and way of doing things. Seems counterintuitive to the group name but it is a public forum so I guess you could be a 70 year old man and still an "established member" of the June 2016 birth club group. Cheers to 9 months of raging hormones and thick skin.
Everyone on this board is due in June, but many of us started on the bump on the trying to get pregnant board. The atmosphere of the Birth Month Boards and the tri boards are very similar to the TTGP board. Additionally, many here seem to have been part of previous BMBs. This means there is a somewhat established atmosphere for the board that is similar to other "The Bump" boards, it isn't a totally new group making up their own brand new format.
Wow! I personally think everyone has been really mean to you in their responses! I personally don't get annoyed about multiples of the same topic, and think EVERYONE should be able to start their own threads for whatever they want. This kind of makes me question whether certain people are actually nice, or are on some kind of high horse.
I totally agree. One said "if you don't like the way we do things, find a different message board". Really?????? Also, the other day there was a post that a girl was 6 weeks and wondered if the flutter she felt could be the baby. People were SOOOOO rude, I know she must have felt stupid. I felt sorry for her. Someone even said "Congrats on your fart baby". Geeeeeez people, we r all grown WOMEN here, not teenage brats. BE NICE!
Grown women would know enough not to ask if a baby that doesn't have legs yet is kicking... or know that there are at least a million other boards out there that do exactly what this one does but with a different attitude. The "Find a different board" comment was not meant to be rude, it was meant as a sincere comment. If you really don't like the attitude here or feel that you don't fit in, please research another board where you will feel more welcome without calling out the hundred other women who already are friends on this board. Not every board is for every person. Just like there are some people that you will never be friends with, you can still peacefully co-exist by simply recognizing that your level of snark/sarcasm/cynicism may not be the same as everybody else's here and that's okay. A happier-toned board may be for you. Telling everybody to "Be nice" and calling them "teenage brats" will probably not change the tone though... FYI.
@Kballew10 I'm just not understanding WHYYY people have to make rude comments!!!! Seriously? This isn't Junior High. We r all here to try to find some common ground with someone, not to be bullied or be made to feel stupid. It's just not right. It's rude and very immature. And you know what? I've never had a problem "fitting in" in my life, but I'm not one to just sit back and take people's ugly and rude comments, even directed at other people and not say anything. I don't even want to be a part of this board anymore, and that's a shame that women will bully others so much and be "clique-y" even on an online forum, that other women don't feel like they "fit in". It's ridiculous, and I think that anyone that is tacky, snarky, rude, or bullies should be absolutely ashamed of themselves. You have NO IDEA what other people are going through or have been through, why be rude???? Why not try to be loving and supportive to other women who are simply looking for some support and guidance? That's all I'm saying.
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UGH. Will you just stop already please?? I don't understand what you're even doing here. So you hate the way we do things here, you call us rude and ugly, tell us we all have to change and be butterflies and rainbows.... Why would you insist on staying someplace you don't like with people you don't like? Why not find someplace that's more to your liking/personality - say Baby center? I really don't get what you're trying to do here except stir the pot then finger wag at everyone else. We call that trolling. Also, stop using the word bullying for everything! You take away the REAL significance of the word! Bullying is a huge problem and no-one on this thread has bullied anyone else. When people use the term bullying lightly (like in an online forum because they don't agree or like someone's "tone") then it takes away from the significance of the word. So please don't. [-(
I haven't seen anything remotely akin to bullying in June 2016 so far. Its not "mean" or otherwise out of line to ask folks to use the search feature on any board. Why? Because after a while the regulars that take time to answer questions will ignore duplicate posts because they are tired of folks not respecting the board (any board) enough to do a little research themselves.
I haven't seen anyone put anyone down and I lurk the birth month boards (BMB) frequently because I have friends on them. I like to keep up with them and see some of the drama (because there are always posts like these).
Those that dislike the tone of the board are not going to change it (no matter which board you are talking about) by complaining and name-calling (calling folks brats). You aren't going to change personalities by insulting others and foot-stomping. Its just not going to happen. I've seen it over and over again. I get it, you want folks to be super supportive and no negative or "real" posts. That's not going to be the case and you should make your peace with the tone of the board. Personality is an asset to the board and those that snark are also (usually) the most knowledgeable.
If you dislike how someone replies you can tell them so. However, making blanket statements about a board you want to belong to is always a bad idea. I'm not pregnant (whomp whomp) but I felt the need to chime in because some of these responses are just over the top.
@Sgoldberg247@mrsschmity - ladies, I think this is a great example of what I was referring to when I said there are people on this board not due in June 2016. I have seen a few postings by different people. It doesn't bother me at all but I did want to point it out since you questioned my comment earlier on. Hope everyone is having a great weekend.
I haven't seen anything remotely akin to bullying in June 2016 so far. Its not "mean" or otherwise out of line to ask folks to use the search feature on any board. Why? Because after a while the regulars that take time to answer questions will ignore duplicate posts because they are tired of folks not respecting the board (any board) enough to do a little research themselves.
I haven't seen anyone put anyone down and I lurk the birth month boards (BMB) frequently because I have friends on them. I like to keep up with them and see some of the drama (because there are always posts like these).
Those that dislike the tone of the board are not going to change it (no matter which board you are talking about) by complaining and name-calling (calling folks brats). You aren't going to change personalities by insulting others and foot-stomping. Its just not going to happen. I've seen it over and over again. I get it, you want folks to be super supportive and no negative or "real" posts. That's not going to be the case and you should make your peace with the tone of the board. Personality is an asset to the board and those that snark are also (usually) the most knowledgeable.
If you dislike how someone replies you can tell them so. However, making blanket statements about a board you want to belong to is always a bad idea. I'm not pregnant (whomp whomp) but I felt the need to chime in because some of these responses are just over the top.
@PrimRoseMama
Are you expecting in June 2016? Doesn't matter to me but when I mentioned in a previous post there were people here not expecting in June 2016 multiple people questioned it. Best Wishes!
Oh no, not at all. I just lurk about. Reminder: you have lurkers that read!
I haven't seen anything remotely akin to bullying in June 2016 so far. Its not "mean" or otherwise out of line to ask folks to use the search feature on any board. Why? Because after a while the regulars that take time to answer questions will ignore duplicate posts because they are tired of folks not respecting the board (any board) enough to do a little research themselves.
I haven't seen anyone put anyone down and I lurk the birth month boards (BMB) frequently because I have friends on them. I like to keep up with them and see some of the drama (because there are always posts like these).
Those that dislike the tone of the board are not going to change it (no matter which board you are talking about) by complaining and name-calling (calling folks brats). You aren't going to change personalities by insulting others and foot-stomping. Its just not going to happen. I've seen it over and over again. I get it, you want folks to be super supportive and no negative or "real" posts. That's not going to be the case and you should make your peace with the tone of the board. Personality is an asset to the board and those that snark are also (usually) the most knowledgeable.
If you dislike how someone replies you can tell them so. However, making blanket statements about a board you want to belong to is always a bad idea. I'm not pregnant (whomp whomp) but I felt the need to chime in because some of these responses are just over the top.
Thank you for chiming in @PrimRoseMama Exactly what I think most of us were trying to get across.
@ucfgemini I guess I didn't count lurkers as people who were "part of the board". I still lurk on TTGP all the time because I miss the ladies over there lol but I get what you're saying
I haven't seen anything remotely akin to bullying in June 2016 so far. Its not "mean" or otherwise out of line to ask folks to use the search feature on any board. Why? Because after a while the regulars that take time to answer questions will ignore duplicate posts because they are tired of folks not respecting the board (any board) enough to do a little research themselves.
I haven't seen anyone put anyone down and I lurk the birth month boards (BMB) frequently because I have friends on them. I like to keep up with them and see some of the drama (because there are always posts like these).
Those that dislike the tone of the board are not going to change it (no matter which board you are talking about) by complaining and name-calling (calling folks brats). You aren't going to change personalities by insulting others and foot-stomping. Its just not going to happen. I've seen it over and over again. I get it, you want folks to be super supportive and no negative or "real" posts. That's not going to be the case and you should make your peace with the tone of the board. Personality is an asset to the board and those that snark are also (usually) the most knowledgeable.
If you dislike how someone replies you can tell them so. However, making blanket statements about a board you want to belong to is always a bad idea. I'm not pregnant (whomp whomp) but I felt the need to chime in because some of these responses are just over the top.
I haven't seen anything remotely akin to bullying in June 2016 so far. Its not "mean" or otherwise out of line to ask folks to use the search feature on any board. Why? Because after a while the regulars that take time to answer questions will ignore duplicate posts because they are tired of folks not respecting the board (any board) enough to do a little research themselves.
I haven't seen anyone put anyone down and I lurk the birth month boards (BMB) frequently because I have friends on them. I like to keep up with them and see some of the drama (because there are always posts like these).
Those that dislike the tone of the board are not going to change it (no matter which board you are talking about) by complaining and name-calling (calling folks brats). You aren't going to change personalities by insulting others and foot-stomping. Its just not going to happen. I've seen it over and over again. I get it, you want folks to be super supportive and no negative or "real" posts. That's not going to be the case and you should make your peace with the tone of the board. Personality is an asset to the board and those that snark are also (usually) the most knowledgeable.
If you dislike how someone replies you can tell them so. However, making blanket statements about a board you want to belong to is always a bad idea. I'm not pregnant (whomp whomp) but I felt the need to chime in because some of these responses are just over the top.
Re: Reluctant to post
I'm out.
Hmmm, did not realize most people already knew each other! I was not actually TTGP, so that wouldn't have been possible for me.
I do feel though, that I have common sense, intelligence, experience (4 pregnancies, 1 miscarriage, 3 babies, c-sections, experience having babies with multiple OBs and at different hospitals,) and that these things would make me a valued asset to the boards. I consider the fact that I don't put others down, even if they don't seem as smart or experienced as me, to be a positive. I can't change how someone else responds to posts, but I can at least show kindness myself.
---------------------------------
QBF.
That wasn't the point of this post though. The point of this post stemmed from a large majority of women on this board trying to generate some organization. Apparently others took that as lack of sympathy or being rude, which it was not intended to be. I'm going to chalk it up to difference of opinion and personality. Oh well.
The majority of the women who contribute here are very kind and offer an amazing support system when it is needed. I wouldn't be so quick to judge based on a multiple threads posted about the same symptom, or lack of symptoms, etc. Maybe take a look at the other posts where we're genuinely trying to get to know each other (the GTKY threads, daily threads, etc) or the support offered to those who are suffering a loss.
I'm out.
I wasn't on the TTGP page. Does this mean you are bullying me off TB community?!?!?! JK
Edited bc I left off an f
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UGH. Will you just stop already please?? I don't understand what you're even doing here. So you hate the way we do things here, you call us rude and ugly, tell us we all have to change and be butterflies and rainbows.... Why would you insist on staying someplace you don't like with people you don't like? Why not find someplace that's more to your liking/personality - say Baby center? I really don't get what you're trying to do here except stir the pot then finger wag at everyone else. We call that trolling.
Also, stop using the word bullying for everything! You take away the REAL significance of the word! Bullying is a huge problem and no-one on this thread has bullied anyone else. When people use the term bullying lightly (like in an online forum because they don't agree or like someone's "tone") then it takes away from the significance of the word. So please don't. [-(
Eta: qbf
I haven't seen anything remotely akin to bullying in June 2016 so far. Its not "mean" or otherwise out of line to ask folks to use the search feature on any board. Why? Because after a while the regulars that take time to answer questions will ignore duplicate posts because they are tired of folks not respecting the board (any board) enough to do a little research themselves.
I haven't seen anyone put anyone down and I lurk the birth month boards (BMB) frequently because I have friends on them. I like to keep up with them and see some of the drama (because there are always posts like these).
Those that dislike the tone of the board are not going to change it (no matter which board you are talking about) by complaining and name-calling (calling folks brats). You aren't going to change personalities by insulting others and foot-stomping. Its just not going to happen. I've seen it over and over again. I get it, you want folks to be super supportive and no negative or "real" posts. That's not going to be the case and you should make your peace with the tone of the board. Personality is an asset to the board and those that snark are also (usually) the most knowledgeable.
If you dislike how someone replies you can tell them so. However, making blanket statements about a board you want to belong to is always a bad idea. I'm not pregnant (whomp whomp) but I felt the need to chime in because some of these responses are just over the top.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
Wishing all of you a happy, healthy pregnancy!
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
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I've been totally lurking TTGP too, checking on @PrimRoseMama
Eta:qbf