June 2016 Moms

Reluctant to post

Hey guys, I have been on this board for probably 3 weeks or so, and I have noticed that there have been a lot of people griping about ladies posting new discussions about certain things, namely pregnancy symptoms bring the biggest one. Isn't that what a board is for?? To talk about what's on your mind? Idk about anyone else, maybe it's just me, but reading all the gripes have made me very reluctant to post any new discussions in the forum because I don't wanna piss anyone off. I hate it.... Sometimes I just wanna post things about how I feel, physically & emotionally. Anyone else have these thoughts???? Or am I just a grump?? :(
«1

Re: Reluctant to post

  • Loading the player...
  • I guess the thought is that there are daily symptom threads for us to share how we feel and that if everyone makes new threads then the pages get cluttered up. I think the "griping" seems to be more of a push for some organization. But I understand how you would feel hesitant to post, as some may come off a little over critical. I think the best thing is to post under the daily symptom thread and maybe indicate if you are wondering if anyone else feels the same. But usually when I read how everyone else is feeling I realize others are having similar experiences.

    Pregnancy Ticker
  • edited October 2015
    There are symptom threads where everyone can post as much as they want. If everyone started their own symptom thread it would seriously clog the site up. If you want to just write about how you feel, maybe use another site in concert with this one. Babyandbump.com has a great pregnancy journal. I don't think it pisses people off as much as it just frustrates... Especially in terms of people posting about symptoms or "gender". These are two of the most posted about things on the bump which is why they both have their own specific threads that everyone can share/comment on and not have to worry. ETA: here is the June 16 symptom thread https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12639236/wednesday-symptoms-thread and another: https://forums.thebump.com/discussion/12639522/thursday-10-29-symptoms#latest
  • I understand how you feel. I think it's great that there is a separate post for people to say what their symptoms are but I have been noticing that when someone will ask a question ppl are commenting advising them that there is a separate post(without even answering the question). I personally don't feel like going through a huge thread to see an answer to my question.
  • Not wanting to post but sticking around also called lurking. Good for you that you did that. I was on TTGP for a long time and it sucks when people post the same thread over and over. If there is a symptoms thread, why does anyone need to post their own ss thread? Makes it easier to read and keep up with.
  • I agree with previous posters about the organization and repetition of questions, but having said that I think you should feel free to post anything you would like (of course according to TOU...).

    Don't be afraid of the snark, girl! I think we are all in this together ans to support each other! Most people don't say things to be mean, so don't take things personally. I hope that on the future you feel a little better about posting-looking forward to it :)>-
    ******TW******Siggy warning
    BFP1 04/24/2015 EDD Dec 2015 MMC 10W5d;
    BFP 2 09/25/2015 EDD June 2016 MMC 9wks; 
    BFP 3 03/22/2016 EDD Dec 6th 2016 

       Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker




  • I understand how you feel. I think it's great that there is a separate post for people to say what their symptoms are but I have been noticing that when someone will ask a question ppl are commenting advising them that there is a separate post(without even answering the question). I personally don't feel like going through a huge thread to see an answer to my question.

    Different strokes for different folks. I'll probably shut up now before my irrational hormones take over, but I hope you also try to understand from our perspective as well.

    image




    I just don't understand why it's a big deal if someone posts a new thread to ask a question? The symptom thread is great for those that just want to vent about how we are feeling but if you Have a specific question why not post a new thread? I don't go back and read the symptoms thread but if I see a question posted and I can offer advice then I will comment. Both are fine but just find it repetitive to see people keep commenting that there is a specific thread for that...
  • BBC was full of snark (at least it was 8 years ago when I was KU with my first), so I think it happens anywhere.

    But yeah. Multiples of the same thread? Annoying. I mean, we have like four threads for those with 2 under 2. Just take a minute to glance and see if it's already been asked.

    Yep. I loved seeing the 2 threads right next to one another asking about temperature changes yesterday. Almost identical titles too. It's not that difficult people! Sorry. Crazy hormone rageyness.
  • CourtJack said:

    I think use your own judgment. If you think your question fits in the symptoms thread - put it there. If you think it warrants it's own discussion, then start a discussion. Nobody is actually 'angry' - I promise. Having a single daily thread is simply an effort to consolidate responses and provide a place where a better conversation can happen. 

    And as with every board in the history of this site - its  considered courteous to do a tiny bit of searching before posting a question that's been answered many times already. That doesn't mean you can't post a question or a concern you have as a new discussion. Just try to do a bit of looking around first.



    This. Just use common sense. The search button is your friend... If you have a question and it hasn't already been asked then feel free to post.
    If you want to blog about your feelings then Baby and bump is a good place to do that.
  • Wow! I personally think everyone has been really mean to you in their responses! I personally don't get annoyed about multiples of the same topic, and think EVERYONE should be able to start their own threads for whatever they want. This kind of makes me question whether certain people are actually nice, or are on some kind of high horse.

    @june2016baby Wait, do u honestly think people have been mean? What exactly is your definition of mean? People have been honest, straight forward and specifically addressed OPs question without going off topic or attacking her in any way. Sure though--- if that's your definition of mean... I would love to hear an example of a "mean" reply on this thread
  • Wow! I personally think everyone has been really mean to you in their responses! I personally don't get annoyed about multiples of the same topic, and think EVERYONE should be able to start their own threads for whatever they want. This kind of makes me question whether certain people are actually nice, or are on some kind of high horse.

    Really mean?? Seriously?! BAHAHAHA! Clearly you're new here.
    Lilypie Fourth Birthday tickers
    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
  • There has been no snark in this thread, and actually a lot of support and kindness. Everyone means well in this thread. It does get annoying to scroll through a ton of threads on the same topic. Also, its courteous to do some searching and post under the threads that are already designated for certain topics. If you want some snark- wait till the gender vs sex posts, BF vs FF, Etc. My old BMB had a lot of snark and I learned to have to thick skin. I'm so thankful for those ladies!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • alylove11 said:

    There has been no snark in this thread, and actually a lot of support and kindness. Everyone means well in this thread. It does get annoying to scroll through a ton of threads on the same topic. Also, its courteous to do some searching and post under the threads that are already designated for certain topics. If you want some snark- wait till the gender vs sex posts, BF vs FF, Etc. My old BMB had a lot of snark and I learned to have to thick skin. I'm so thankful for those ladies!

    I am surprised nobody has asked/commented about their baby kicking during the first trimester! My last BMB went on for pages of snark-so funny!

    ******TW******Siggy warning
    BFP1 04/24/2015 EDD Dec 2015 MMC 10W5d;
    BFP 2 09/25/2015 EDD June 2016 MMC 9wks; 
    BFP 3 03/22/2016 EDD Dec 6th 2016 

       Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


  • alylove11 said:

    There has been no snark in this thread, and actually a lot of support and kindness. Everyone means well in this thread. It does get annoying to scroll through a ton of threads on the same topic. Also, its courteous to do some searching and post under the threads that are already designated for certain topics. If you want some snark- wait till the gender vs sex posts, BF vs FF, Etc. My old BMB had a lot of snark and I learned to have to thick skin. I'm so thankful for those ladies!

    I am surprised nobody has asked/commented about their baby kicking during the first trimester! My last BMB went on for pages of snark-so funny!

    It happened already, but it was tame :)
  • Bear14+ said:

    alylove11 said:

    There has been no snark in this thread, and actually a lot of support and kindness. Everyone means well in this thread. It does get annoying to scroll through a ton of threads on the same topic. Also, its courteous to do some searching and post under the threads that are already designated for certain topics. If you want some snark- wait till the gender vs sex posts, BF vs FF, Etc. My old BMB had a lot of snark and I learned to have to thick skin. I'm so thankful for those ladies!

    I am surprised nobody has asked/commented about their baby kicking during the first trimester! My last BMB went on for pages of snark-so funny!

    It happened already, but it was tame :)
    Oh man! I missed it!

    ******TW******Siggy warning
    BFP1 04/24/2015 EDD Dec 2015 MMC 10W5d;
    BFP 2 09/25/2015 EDD June 2016 MMC 9wks; 
    BFP 3 03/22/2016 EDD Dec 6th 2016 

       Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker


  • Wow! I personally think everyone has been really mean to you in their responses! I personally don't get annoyed about multiples of the same topic, and think EVERYONE should be able to start their own threads for whatever they want. This kind of makes me question whether certain people are actually nice, or are on some kind of high horse.


    I totally agree. One said "if you don't like the way we do things, find a different message board". Really?????? Also, the other day there was a post that a girl was 6 weeks and wondered if the flutter she felt could be the baby. People were SOOOOO rude, I know she must have felt stupid. I felt sorry for her. Someone even said "Congrats on your fart baby". Geeeeeez people, we r all grown WOMEN here, not teenage brats. BE NICE!
  • agillespie15agillespie15 member
    edited October 2015
    Kballew10 said:



    Wow! I personally think everyone has been really mean to you in their responses! I personally don't get annoyed about multiples of the same topic, and think EVERYONE should be able to start their own threads for whatever they want. This kind of makes me question whether certain people are actually nice, or are on some kind of high horse.


    I totally agree. One said "if you don't like the way we do things, find a different message board". Really?????? Also, the other day there was a post that a girl was 6 weeks and wondered if the flutter she felt could be the baby. People were SOOOOO rude, I know she must have felt stupid. I felt sorry for her. Someone even said "Congrats on your fart baby". Geeeeeez people, we r all grown WOMEN here, not teenage brats. BE NICE!

    Grown women would know enough not to ask if a baby that doesn't have legs yet is kicking... or know that there are at least a million other boards out there that do exactly what this one does but with a different attitude.  The "Find a different board" comment was not meant to be rude, it was meant as a sincere comment.  If you really don't like the attitude here or feel that you don't fit in, please research another board where you will feel more welcome without calling out the hundred other women who already are friends on this board.  Not every board is for every person.  Just like there are some people that you will never be friends with, you can still peacefully co-exist by simply recognizing that your level of snark/sarcasm/cynicism may not be the same as everybody else's here and that's okay.  A happier-toned board may be for you.  Telling everybody to "Be nice" and calling them "teenage brats" will probably not change the tone though... FYI.

    @Kballew10 I'm just not understanding WHYYY people have to make rude comments!!!! Seriously? This isn't Junior High. We r all here to try to find some common ground with someone, not to be bullied or be made to feel stupid. It's just not right. It's rude and very immature. And you know what? I've never had a problem "fitting in" in my life, but I'm not one to just sit back and take people's ugly and rude comments, even directed at other people and not say anything. I don't even want to be a part of this board anymore, and that's a shame that women will bully others so much and be "clique-y" even on an online forum, that other women don't feel like they "fit in". It's ridiculous, and I think that anyone that is tacky, snarky, rude, or bullies should be absolutely ashamed of themselves. You have NO IDEA what other people are going through or have been through, why be rude???? Why not try to be loving and supportive to other women who are simply looking for some support and guidance? That's all I'm saying.

  • augbride87augbride87 member
    edited October 2015
    agillespie15  It can be hard as a new poster to feel welcomed and to know what posts will be accepted.  Every board is completely different.  I have found the ladies here very welcoming and not as snarky as I have seen other boards.  I agree though, if you dont feel welcome then do some research because there are a TON of different boards to join :) (I dont mean that in a mean way at all and hope you do stay here)

    My suggestion if you are wanting to post a certain topic is to search it to see if it has been posted before. If it has been and it is a recent post then I would just comment on that thread--someone is obviously experiencing the same thing and is probably more then excited to talk to you about it..  If it has been awhile then start a new thread.   If you want to vent about a certain symptom I would preface that rant in your title so people know its a rant and wont click if they aren't interested.   In general we are all supportive of each other since we are all going through this experience together, but be prepared for snarky comments if your question could be answered by a simple Google search (ie fetal kicks at 6weeks).  There are so many trolls that love to post crap like that just to mess with people!
    image
    Pregnancy Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • @augbride87 thank you for being cordial in your post. I get what you're saying. Idk I guess I'm just different than some women. I was raised "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all". I just don't understand why people have to be rude, that's all. I guess that is most women in general though. There's just no reason for it.
  • @june2016baby , I feel like we think a lot the same, and I appreciate your comment.
  • agillespie15  I was raised the same way, so I just tend to turn my head at those posts, and if I don't want to read about it I wont click on it. I don't think it is women, it is people in general, specially on a public website--and again most of the women on here are very helpful.   Don't get discouraged by a few :) 
    image
    Pregnancy Ticker
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

  • This board is wayyyyy kinder and tamer than my last board. A14 anyone?

    Do you mean April 14?! I was on that board only under a different name
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"