Did you tell people what happened? I hadn't told anyone other than a friend that I was pregnant, but people at work have been asking if I'm okay since I've been off for a few days. I've been honest that I lost a pregnancy this week. My responses have been short and sweet: "I lost a pregnancy, but I'm doing a little better now. Thanks for asking." Part of me is worried about making them feel awkward, but I don't have the desire to hide it or pretend everything is fine. I'm typically a very private person, but I have worked with these people for 5 years and it's really unusual for me to miss work. How did you handle it?
On a side note, I didn't know this would physically hurt so much. I was in so much pain yesterday, but I'm finally starting to feel better. Hopefully the feeling better sticks around.
Me: 29, DH: 31
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
Re: How open were you with people?
I just had a diagnosed mmc on Thursday. I spent the weekend miscarrying and today is first day I'm feeling even kind of close to normal (physically anyway). I was out Thurs, Fri and Mon. I went back yesterday but it was too soon and I wasn't ready, physically or mentally. I'm working from home today and plan on going back tomorrow.
I actually work for the same company as my husband (different offices) so he was actually able to give my coworkers the heads up. They didn't know we were pregnant and I never miss work either so they were all wondering why I was out for so long and so suddenly. I think it helped that he was able to tell them so didn't have to say it out loud. I wasn't ready to talk about it or even say the word miscarriage.
As much as I didn't want to say anything to anybody, I think it's helpful that they know. He told a few people that I had a miscarriage but that I didn't want to talk about it. Word got out pretty quickly. Most people respected us enough not to say anything. There are always some nosey Nellie's out there, but I think being honest with them and telling them you just aren't ready to talk about it worked for me. We'll find out when I go back tomorrow.
I understand where you are and where you've been. I hope things continue to get and stay better for you.
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
It's been a long road- Let's just say that!
For me, it was helpful to acknowledge my loss, and not try to pretend things were okay, or have people wondering what was going on.