2nd Trimester

Anyone else throwing their own BABY SHOWER!?!?

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Re: Anyone else throwing their own BABY SHOWER!?!?

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  • Annie121 said:

    I don't understand why everyone is so jumpy on this subject. I planned my own shower, along with my sister but I was totally involved. I made my own cake, did my own invites, centerpieces and cooked our own food... organized everything. It had nothing to do with being a control freak, it's just that it was the way it worked out. I'm a teacher, so the creative part in me just had a ball. I bought the prizes because I knew who my guests were and I wanted to cater to them. I looked up the games that were going to be played and who were the ones playing it. This is a party and if you feel you can do it, why not. There's no rule, and none of my family or friends thought it was tacky that I did it.

    How many times do we have to explain it? A shower is a gift giving event. The SOLE purpose of the event is to give gifts to the guest of honor (which is the MOTHER, not the BABY). No, it is NOT the same as a birthday party (purpose is to celebrate the birth of the guest of honor, guests are traditionally gift, but not the purpose of the event) or a wedding (purpose is to celebrate the union of the couple, again, gifts traditionally given, but not the purpose of the event). 

    IT IS TACKY, period, end of sentence, not an opinion, BEING THE GUEST OF HONOR, to invite people to come and give you gifts. IT IS NOT TACKY for another person to invite others to gather and give gifts to the guest of honor. 

    The shower itself is a gift to the guest of honor. It is tacky to involve yourself in the planning of the shower, as that makes you a co-host. It is fine to answer questions if they are asked of you (what flavor of cake do you like, do you like this theme, do you prefer sandwiches or a hot meal, etc.), but otherwise BUTT OUT. 

    I can care less about etiquette and what is "normal". When i did my shower and helped my sister organzie, it was a very DIY event, and since im a young mom who doesnt have rich friends who can offer to plan and organize without it affecting their schedules, the best choice FOR ME was to do it myself, hence the DIY part of it. And no my friends didn't talk about me behind my back and say it was tacky, we left high school a few years ago and the shit talking along with it. My friends are real friends and if they're going ro talk about my events then they can turn right back around to where they came from. I do my events because that's what i love, and i do it for me and my guests to enjoy. In Spanish we have a saying that says "para los gustos se hicieron los colores" , which roughly translates to different colors were made for different tastes. You think it's tacky, then thats clearly your OPINION, which you are entitled to, just like im entitled to think its a bit close minded, and if your circle of friends are that judgemental then i feel bad for you.
  • @PreggersinParis I'm so sorry I missed your question directed to me. I was going to refrain from commenting but you directly asked me something!

    My vacation was terrible. All my buds know about it.

    I already stated my opinion on this thread.
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  • Didn't read all reponses but in one word...tacky.
  • Annie121 said:

    Annie121 said:

    I don't understand why everyone is so jumpy on this subject. I planned my own shower, along with my sister but I was totally involved. I made my own cake, did my own invites, centerpieces and cooked our own food... organized everything. It had nothing to do with being a control freak, it's just that it was the way it worked out. I'm a teacher, so the creative part in me just had a ball. I bought the prizes because I knew who my guests were and I wanted to cater to them. I looked up the games that were going to be played and who were the ones playing it. This is a party and if you feel you can do it, why not. There's no rule, and none of my family or friends thought it was tacky that I did it.

    How many times do we have to explain it? A shower is a gift giving event. The SOLE purpose of the event is to give gifts to the guest of honor (which is the MOTHER, not the BABY). No, it is NOT the same as a birthday party (purpose is to celebrate the birth of the guest of honor, guests are traditionally gift, but not the purpose of the event) or a wedding (purpose is to celebrate the union of the couple, again, gifts traditionally given, but not the purpose of the event). 

    IT IS TACKY, period, end of sentence, not an opinion, BEING THE GUEST OF HONOR, to invite people to come and give you gifts. IT IS NOT TACKY for another person to invite others to gather and give gifts to the guest of honor. 

    The shower itself is a gift to the guest of honor. It is tacky to involve yourself in the planning of the shower, as that makes you a co-host. It is fine to answer questions if they are asked of you (what flavor of cake do you like, do you like this theme, do you prefer sandwiches or a hot meal, etc.), but otherwise BUTT OUT. 

    I can care less about etiquette and what is "normal". When i did my shower and helped my sister organzie, it was a very DIY event, and since im a young mom who doesnt have rich friends who can offer to plan and organize without it affecting their schedules, the best choice FOR ME was to do it myself, hence the DIY part of it. And no my friends didn't talk about me behind my back and say it was tacky, we left high school a few years ago and the shit talking along with it. My friends are real friends and if they're going ro talk about my events then they can turn right back around to where they came from. I do my events because that's what i love, and i do it for me and my guests to enjoy. In Spanish we have a saying that says "para los gustos se hicieron los colores" , which roughly translates to different colors were made for different tastes. You think it's tacky, then thats clearly your OPINION, which you are entitled to, just like im entitled to think its a bit close minded, and if your circle of friends are that judgemental then i feel bad for you.
    Ugh. The proper term is that you "couldn't care less".

    You don't get it. You aren't entitled to a shower. You aren't entitled to demand gifts from people simply because your uterus is occupied. There wasn't a single reason given here that helps you not seem gift grabby. Just because your circle of friends isn't educated on etiquette doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

    No it seems to me that you don't get it. .. when we did the baby shower it was a party, a reason for family members to get together and enjoy and nice afternoon, play games and eat food did, i already had all i needed from my family members so the gifts were not the rain for the party, but there's no use in continuing this feed and arguing with close minded individuals
  • Annie121 said:

    Annie121 said:

    Annie121 said:

    I don't understand why everyone is so jumpy on this subject. I planned my own shower, along with my sister but I was totally involved. I made my own cake, did my own invites, centerpieces and cooked our own food... organized everything. It had nothing to do with being a control freak, it's just that it was the way it worked out. I'm a teacher, so the creative part in me just had a ball. I bought the prizes because I knew who my guests were and I wanted to cater to them. I looked up the games that were going to be played and who were the ones playing it. This is a party and if you feel you can do it, why not. There's no rule, and none of my family or friends thought it was tacky that I did it.

    How many times do we have to explain it? A shower is a gift giving event. The SOLE purpose of the event is to give gifts to the guest of honor (which is the MOTHER, not the BABY). No, it is NOT the same as a birthday party (purpose is to celebrate the birth of the guest of honor, guests are traditionally gift, but not the purpose of the event) or a wedding (purpose is to celebrate the union of the couple, again, gifts traditionally given, but not the purpose of the event). 

    IT IS TACKY, period, end of sentence, not an opinion, BEING THE GUEST OF HONOR, to invite people to come and give you gifts. IT IS NOT TACKY for another person to invite others to gather and give gifts to the guest of honor. 

    The shower itself is a gift to the guest of honor. It is tacky to involve yourself in the planning of the shower, as that makes you a co-host. It is fine to answer questions if they are asked of you (what flavor of cake do you like, do you like this theme, do you prefer sandwiches or a hot meal, etc.), but otherwise BUTT OUT. 

    I can care less about etiquette and what is "normal". When i did my shower and helped my sister organzie, it was a very DIY event, and since im a young mom who doesnt have rich friends who can offer to plan and organize without it affecting their schedules, the best choice FOR ME was to do it myself, hence the DIY part of it. And no my friends didn't talk about me behind my back and say it was tacky, we left high school a few years ago and the shit talking along with it. My friends are real friends and if they're going ro talk about my events then they can turn right back around to where they came from. I do my events because that's what i love, and i do it for me and my guests to enjoy. In Spanish we have a saying that says "para los gustos se hicieron los colores" , which roughly translates to different colors were made for different tastes. You think it's tacky, then thats clearly your OPINION, which you are entitled to, just like im entitled to think its a bit close minded, and if your circle of friends are that judgemental then i feel bad for you.
    Ugh. The proper term is that you "couldn't care less".

    You don't get it. You aren't entitled to a shower. You aren't entitled to demand gifts from people simply because your uterus is occupied. There wasn't a single reason given here that helps you not seem gift grabby. Just because your circle of friends isn't educated on etiquette doesn't mean it doesn't exist.

    No it seems to me that you don't get it. .. when we did the baby shower it was a party, a reason for family members to get together and enjoy and nice afternoon, play games and eat food did, i already had all i needed from my family members so the gifts were not the rain for the party, but there's no use in continuing this feed and arguing with close minded individuals
    There's no use in continuing but you still comment. Right.
    You can always get together with family. That's the common excuse. It doesn't have to be a gift giving event. If you and your family don't understand etiquette, fine. But arguing against it or not believing in it doesn't mean it doesn't exist. It's still tacky.
    This. You are welcome to have a party that is not centered around gifts with your family and friends at any time. No rule against that. But THAT IS NOT A SHOWER. It's called a shower because the intent is to "shower" the guest of honor with gifts. A shower is a gift giving event, period...which is why throwing one for yourself is tacky. All you have to do is CALL IT SOMETHING ELSE and not include registry info on the invite, and you're not breaking etiquette.

    Just because you don't agree with etiquette doesn't mean it doesn't exist...or that other people you know feel the same way.
  • I agree with you when I threw my own I just wanted a bbq and hang out with friends i even said no presents

  • I agree with you when I threw my own I just wanted a bbq and hang out with friends i even said no presents
    Then that is not a shower.

    I love how people are so adamant that they are 'right', and social rules and etiquette does not apply to them.


    Etiquette (noun). -
    conventional requirements as to social behavior; proprieties of conduct as established in any class or community or for any occasion.


    Meaning- agreed upon social norms and practices.


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  • I Just read the first comment and had to say something right away . When did it become that serious ? Like ima show up to a friends baby shower and find out she planned it and turn up my nose or something ! I don't get how it's tacky at all lol . I feel like when you have a specific vision and plan on how you want something to go; who better to do it then yourself ??? I know I'm planning my own . Maybe it's the graphic designer in me but I'm way too design orientated to leave my baby shower up to someone else . My boyfriend is very creative as well so I honestly go to him with my ideas and we've been planning it like that .


    I think some of yawl are caught up in tradition when it's not that serious .
  • Why is this thread (and this topic) still happening?
  • This content has been removed.
  • nknapp97nknapp97 member
    edited June 2015
    To answer the original posted question, yes. I am throwing my own baby shower as well.
  • Do you boo!
  • lol hormone thread. 
  • This is the thread that never ends....

    Yes it goes on and on, my friends...

    Some people starting posting not knowing what it was...

    And they'll continue posting forever just because this is the thread that never ends....

  • You know you all like planning parties too...give a girl a break.
  • I'm throwing a baby shower for myself with help of my friends because my family won't help me. So all of my friends are chipping in. I'm greatful
  • edited July 2015
    Really late and completely off topic but, what does "MUD" mean?

    Update: Never mind, I found a whole board on it. I just don't know how to delete my comment. Please don't judge me lol
  • edited July 2015
    Maybe this is a stupid question, but how would anyone know she threw her own shower unless she like announced it? Otherwise, I get both sides of the debate here. It is rude to turn down an offer for someone to throw the future mom a shower because she just wants it to be exactly her way. But I also understand wanting things to be perfect. I suggest taking the offer and saying you have ideas and sharing them. But if it is going to be this much of a thing, where the best friend is essentially micromanaged about a cake that she is offering to purchase as a gift, then maybe she should do it herself.



    ** I just asked 3 men about this and they all said: "Yeahhhh so no. Her family or his family should do it. Not her." So I guess this is a universal thing. **
  • Jonesy226 said:
    Maybe this is a stupid question, but how would anyone know she threw her own shower unless she like announced it? Otherwise, I get both sides of the debate here. It is rude to turn down an offer for someone to throw the future mom a shower because she just wants it to be exactly her way. But I also understand wanting things to be perfect. I suggest taking the offer and saying you have ideas and sharing them. But if it is going to be this much of a thing, where the best friend is essentially micromanaged about a cake that she is offering to purchase as a gift, then maybe she should do it herself. ** I just asked 3 men about this and they all said: "Yeahhhh so no. Her family or his family should do it. Not her." So I guess this is a universal thing. **
    Nope. 

    Frozen has lessons for adults too. 
    image

    It's cake. It's just cake. The adult thing to do isn't micromanage your friends who are offering to throw a party for you, it's to not worry about the goddamn cake.

  • Jonesy226 said:

    Maybe this is a stupid question, but how would anyone know she threw her own shower unless she like announced it? Otherwise, I get both sides of the debate here. It is rude to turn down an offer for someone to throw the future mom a shower because she just wants it to be exactly her way. But I also understand wanting things to be perfect. I suggest taking the offer and saying you have ideas and sharing them. But if it is going to be this much of a thing, where the best friend is essentially micromanaged about a cake that she is offering to purchase as a gift, then maybe she should do it herself.



    ** I just asked 3 men about this and they all said: "Yeahhhh so no. Her family or his family should do it. Not her." So I guess this is a universal thing. **

    Nope. 

    Frozen has lessons for adults too. 
    image

    It's cake. It's just cake. The adult thing to do isn't micromanage your friends who are offering to throw a party for you, it's to not worry about the goddamn cake.



    Lmao I love the gif. My coworker sings this whenever anything happens at work. Idk, this whole shower thing is weird to me. I just don't want her to be unhappy I guess, but she will be OK if she doesn't have a shower... I know life will go on. You know, come to think of it...maybe that is why the friend just offered the cake and not to do the shower.... makes sense. Don't mind me, I'm a total nube to all this. Thankful my Mom is doing my shower.
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