My UO is going to be extremely unpopular. I cannot express how much it bothers me when people expect endless amounts of gifts for basically just doing normal things in life. Somebody mentioned being in weddings earlier. I'm not saying anything against that, all I'm saying is that I paid for every one of my bridesmaids dresses as well as their hotel rooms. Because I think it's very rude to expect somebody else to spend money to do you a favor. We specifically asked on our invitations that people do not give us gifts. In all fairness, we really didn't need anything… So I think registering is fine, but keep it under control. For that matter, add on bachelorette parties and bridal showers that the bride expects other people not only to organize but also to pay for. Then they expect everybody to give them an expensive gift for both an engagement party and the wedding. Next pregnancy comes around and you expect more gifts for your child at your shower. Then each birthday expect your friends to give your child something. If you have more than one child and more than one shower, how wonderful! You never have to spend a dime.
I'm not against registering or having gifts or showers. It's the people that are expecting that everybody should give them something extraordinarily expensive or lavish that bothers me the most.
And this is not aimed against people that do not have items already and have a harder time affording them. It's for people that already have anything they can want that is tangible and expect to keep being gifted other items by people around them.
It's the entitlement that kills me.
I agree mostly I think I hated registering for gifts! I registered at one store and there want even enough on there for everyone to get us something. I also tried to keep bridesmaids' costs low... They picked their own black dresses that didn't even have to be "bridesmaids-y".
I do think I'll enjoy registering for baby stuff and getting nice stuff haha. Besides the one baby shower I'll have, I don't think I'd expect more than that... We have a huge family, so gifts for everyone for birthdays and even Xmas just can't happen.
So as usual, I agree @BostonBaby1! I agree with most of the uo, haha, except for not wanting to use the search function
I promise it was not as bad as it sounds!!! It took forever to heal but they give you some nice pain meds to take so your not in pain!! Just remember that some people to not tear at all!!!
My UO this week is that I've been bored with the boards. Yes, I'm pregnant. Yes, I have a baby. But I also have other interests. Wish we had more threads about our life experiences extending beyond showers, diapers, and nursery decor.
On one of my other pregnancy forums we have non baby related questions of the day, kind of to get to know one another, and just to chat about other topics. Are they frowned upon here on the bump?? If they are not frowned upon, I'll try to do one every now and then
My UO this week is that I've been bored with the boards. Yes, I'm pregnant. Yes, I have a baby. But I also have other interests. Wish we had more threads about our life experiences extending beyond showers, diapers, and nursery decor.
Agree! I don't cook, but if you Think of other things please feel free
I don't like when people give you things for your baby without asking if you need it or want it. That sounds terrible -- gifts are wonderful, hand-me-downs are awesome -- but for a first time mom, don't make them feel obligated to take your stroller or car seat or bassinet because maybe, just maybe they want to do their own research and find one that is right for them. Or maybe, just maybe they can't afford the other attachments of the nice shit you're giving them and it will force them to spend money they don't want to.
I have a few people who are pulling together clothes, shoes, toys, etc. All fine. Especially because they said, "hey, if you want, we can pull some stuff together for you that we still have from our youngest." But we also have a few that are like, "here, take this. It's great. You'll love it." It's hard to say no and then you feel obligated to use it ... and it's just, ugh.
Not ungrateful, just a new mom who wants to figure some of this shit out on my own thank you very much!
My uo is I'm pregnant not handicapped. My boss and coworkers I love them and most of the time eat up the attention but how much they worry about me sometimes annoys me to no end. My boss has come in my office no less than 10 times to ask if I'm ok because I look spaced out. No I'm trying not to puke, and feel some weird wiggling, not sure what it is. SO is one thing when he is good enough to take care of anything I need, but when my boss and coworkers waiting on me, I just feel silly... One minor flushed almost blacking out incident and I can't leave my office without putting a sticky note where I'm going....
Other UO for the day is people trying to force their ideas down your throat. My sister is a big fan of this. She feels she has to educate me because she has 2 children, no your not educating, your making it about you, and trying to force me to make the same choices you did. This is why I am not speaking with her as my blood pressure is low now but I'm on baby aspirin for my risk of preeclampsia which she almost died not once but twice from, and we almost lost my nephew from. Can we say people need to be understanding on stress, I may be able to do 99% of what I did before I was pregnant, but handle your stress is in that 1%. She also trying to tag along on my parents meeting me 1/2 way from her house to mine when they visiting her from NY. I'm not speaking to you, im not going to your house, what makes you think I want to see you....
I don't think it's a UO but it's annoying the crap out of me so I will share... I really do not like when people who have never been pregnant tell me how I'm suppose to feel or not feel. Example: went to dinner last night with two friends. Friend A tells me my boobs look bigger. And I say well they have been super painful so not a big shocker. Friend B looks over and says yeah I think your both crazy it's waaaay to early for that. To which I responded with.....
I hate when people complain about having a December baby because of the winter and the holidays. It seems so petty to me. Definitely first world problems.
I also hate the idea of having a half birthday for the kids. Its just teaching them that their birth date isn't good enough because you cant go in a pool.
Same here, I feel like they should be grateful that they are going to be having a baby, but that's just my opinion.
I hate the half birthdays too, I'm a February baby and my two younger sisters are August babies-so there was no way that my mom was going to do two birthday parties and a half b day party in the month of August! (Plus my mom's b day is in August lol)
I don't think it's a UO but it's annoying the crap out of me so I will share... I really do not like when people who have never been pregnant tell me how I'm suppose to feel or not feel. Example: went to dinner last night with two friends. Friend A tells me my boobs look bigger. And I say well they have been super painful so not a big shocker. Friend B looks over and says yeah I think your both crazy it's waaaay to early for that. To which I responded with.....
Sounds like friend a and friend b would be good friends with my sister. You should do this, this is what you should feel. We sisters but doesn't mean our pregnancies should be the same. Also wanted to kill SO when he mentioned, his daughters mom didn't show till she was 6 months I'm really showing early..: don't make me beat you boy!!!
My UO is going to be extremely unpopular. I cannot express how much it bothers me when people expect endless amounts of gifts for basically just doing normal things in life. Somebody mentioned being in weddings earlier. I'm not saying anything against that, all I'm saying is that I paid for every one of my bridesmaids dresses as well as their hotel rooms. Because I think it's very rude to expect somebody else to spend money to do you a favor. We specifically asked on our invitations that people do not give us gifts. In all fairness, we really didn't need anything… So I think registering is fine, but keep it under control. For that matter, add on bachelorette parties and bridal showers that the bride expects other people not only to organize but also to pay for. Then they expect everybody to give them an expensive gift for both an engagement party and the wedding. Next pregnancy comes around and you expect more gifts for your child at your shower. Then each birthday expect your friends to give your child something. If you have more than one child and more than one shower, how wonderful! You never have to spend a dime.
I'm not against registering or having gifts or showers. It's the people that are expecting that everybody should give them something extraordinarily expensive or lavish that bothers me the most.
And this is not aimed against people that do not have items already and have a harder time affording them. It's for people that already have anything they can want that is tangible and expect to keep being gifted other items by people around them.
It's the entitlement that kills me.
I agree mostly I think I hated registering for gifts! I registered at one store and there want even enough on there for everyone to get us something. I also tried to keep bridesmaids' costs low... They picked their own black dresses that didn't even have to be "bridesmaids-y".
I do think I'll enjoy registering for baby stuff and getting nice stuff haha. Besides the one baby shower I'll have, I don't think I'd expect more than that... We have a huge family, so gifts for everyone for birthdays and even Xmas just can't happen.
So as usual, I agree @BostonBaby1! I agree with most of the uo, haha, except for not wanting to use the search function
This is because you are so sweet honey! Again, I'm not against registering and I completely understand that when people have weddings that they need to have things on the registry so that people know what to get them and are at least given a direction in which to go. It's actually inconsiderate for guests at larger weddings not have a registry (we only had 47 people so it was easier to get them to not bring gifts… A lot of people donated to charity instead.) not registering makes it complicated for the guests and the fact that you didn't like to register just shows that you are exactly NOT the type of entitled person that I was referring to. Even if you did like registering, that still wouldn't make you the entitled type of person I'm referring to. It's the people that register for $1500 sterling silver place settings that their guests cannot afford that piss me off. I can't stand when people say "we will just finish purchasing the rest of our registry," and register for A ludicrous amount of presents. If your guests can afford to each gift you $3000 then that is fine. Otherwise, if someone's taste is so lavish than they should just buy it for themselves in the first place. I have had friends lament to me over not wanting to give somebody a single salad fork for a present.
Registering for baby shower is exciting and you should definitely do it! Believe me sweetheart, you are not the type of person that is pissing me off. I'm sure that you will do the considerate thing which will be to put some high-priced items on your registry as well as some more affordable choices for people that can't spend as much :-) there will be people that will want to spend a lot of money on you and your LO and not only is that fine, it's wonderful! Especially because you will get things that you might not be able to get otherwise. Also, people want to celebrate you and that's a great thing! It's the people that expect constant gifts being given forever that elicited my rant.
Love you!
Oh, and my other UO... Please use the search function!
@erikaalzet I've had mother's come in for their kids prescription and they say the name ie James Jones, look for the script under the J's and can't find it, then you look it up on the computer, still can't kind it. Then they go, Oh it could be under Watson, cause it's hyphenated, then you finally find it after wasting time looking under J when it was with the W's! Guess it's just one of those things that might not bother other people, but when you have to look in multiple places it takes up time, which we don't always have in the pharmacy. Rant over Of course no offense to anyone who has a hyphenated name!
Hyphenated last names, as a pharmacy technician there is no better way to piss me off.....and yes I went there, please don't report me
Haha. They don't piss me off too much, but it's kind of annoying in schools too. I've worked in very Hispanic populations and that's very popular (wrong word- traditional would be better I think), but it makes it a pain in the butt to find students' files! I almost always know the "wrong" name, lol
Speaking of weddings! I can't stand when people ask for money instead of gifts. A family member did that a few years ago and to this day they resent someone who didn't give them money and will complain about it. I thought weddings were a time to celebrate starting a new life together with all your friends and family present, not a way to raise funds.
Ohandalso, I will not be allowing anyone other than DH and immediate family to touch my belly. Friends I will politely ask not to. Strangers can expect me to step away, slap their hand away, express a few loud words or a combo of the above.
So I know we already hit the using the search function but here you go. It really bothers me but if someone feels the need to be so special and have their own post fine I get it. However, double posting is seriously getting to me. Learn how to use the Internet or get some patience to check your post went through before trying again. Do not post the same thread multiple times. I have seen this multiple times in the last few days.
I wouldn't normally complain but I am super irritated so I this is coming out. I am SO tired of women shaming other women when it comes to how they pregnant. I have PCOS I tried several dietary changes, exercise routines, acupuncture, basically anything my Dr. told me to try I did it. None of it worked for me. I ended up having to do cycles of femara and we got pregnant!! (wohoo)
Then I look at these boards or talk to other people with PCOS who dieted their way to pregnancy. Let me tell you, I am happy for you! I wouldn't wish those treatments on anyone. But seriously if you shame me for not doing it "the natural way" I will loose my shit.
IT IS RUDE! Someone actually commented and said they got pregnant because they didn't "cheat" on their diet. Let's get one thing straight, you don't know me, or if I cheated or not.
I just wish people could acknowledge that some things work for some people and not for others. Be grateful you are pregnant regardless of how you got there and don't make other people feel bad because they didn't do it your way.
I wouldn't normally complain but I am super irritated so I this is coming out. I am SO tired of women shaming other women when it comes to how they pregnant. I have PCOS I tried several dietary changes, exercise routines, acupuncture, basically anything my Dr. told me to try I did it. None of it worked for me. I ended up having to do cycles of femara and we got pregnant!! (wohoo)
Then I look at these boards or talk to other people with PCOS who dieted their way to pregnancy. Let me tell you, I am happy for you! I wouldn't wish those treatments on anyone. But seriously if you shame me for not doing it "the natural way" I will loose my shit.
IT IS RUDE! Someone actually commented and said they got pregnant because they didn't "cheat" on their diet. Let's get one thing straight, you don't know me, or if I cheated or not.
I just wish people could acknowledge that some things work for some people and not for others. Be grateful you are pregnant regardless of how you got there and don't make other people feel bad because they didn't do it your way.
end of rant..sorry!
I'm sorry that you feel that or anyone made you feel that way. It's true, what works for one may not work for another. Yay for being pregnant!! Ignore those jerks.
I don't actually like the baby stage. Like, at all. I count down the days until they can feed themselves and walk and talk. Doesn't mean I'm not excited about having another baby, but mostly because we will have another new person in the family. I love to watch their personality emerge.
My UO for the day..the military gives us a 200 pg. book and passport to fill out each week. And also a mandatory birthing class. Ain't nobody got time for that!!
I get annoyed when I hear anyone complaining about being pregnant. I know it's hard, but after 2.5 years, 4 fertility treatments and a miscarriage, I am just grateful to have a baby on the way! I don't care how sick I feel, what month the baby is born (December haters), that I can't drink, etc.
I wouldn't normally complain but I am super irritated so I this is coming out. I am SO tired of women shaming other women when it comes to how they pregnant. I have PCOS I tried several dietary changes, exercise routines, acupuncture, basically anything my Dr. told me to try I did it. None of it worked for me. I ended up having to do cycles of femara and we got pregnant!! (wohoo)
Then I look at these boards or talk to other people with PCOS who dieted their way to pregnancy. Let me tell you, I am happy for you! I wouldn't wish those treatments on anyone. But seriously if you shame me for not doing it "the natural way" I will loose my shit.
IT IS RUDE! Someone actually commented and said they got pregnant because they didn't "cheat" on their diet. Let's get one thing straight, you don't know me, or if I cheated or not.
I just wish people could acknowledge that some things work for some people and not for others. Be grateful you are pregnant regardless of how you got there and don't make other people feel bad because they didn't do it your way.
end of rant..sorry!
What on earth??? I'm So sorry someone made you feel that way!!! It's complete BS!! I have PCOS. I believe in healthy eating and I tried it too!! Didn't cheat - didn't work! Ugh!!! I hate when people push remedies on you then get mad at YOU because it didn't work! I got pregnant with a lot of prayer and a lot of Metformin. Clomid would have been our next step of Metformin alone hadn't worked. (I have insulin resistance). Totally would have done Femara if that had been the RE's drug of choice.
Congrats on your baby!! No matter how you conceived!! I consider us the lucky ones since the drugs worked!!
I don't actually like the baby stage. Like, at all. I count down the days until they can feed themselves and walk and talk. Doesn't mean I'm not excited about having another baby, but mostly because we will have another new person in the family. I love to watch their personality emerge.
I dislike the newborn stage. Give me a 5 mo old baby and I'm much happier!
A pregnancy is a pregnancy and a birth is a birth. People will always be assholes about one thing or another. You can't get let it get to you Cheers to healthy babies!
I don't actually like the baby stage. Like, at all. I count down the days until they can feed themselves and walk and talk. Doesn't mean I'm not excited about having another baby, but mostly because we will have another new person in the family. I love to watch their personality emerge.
I dislike the newborn stage. Give me a 5 mo old baby and I'm much happier!
I'm also going to echo the half birthday stuff. I thought of this uo while reading the thoughts on december babies thread and totally forgot till I read the uo here! I don't get it. Seriously, their bday is in december, so WHY would you celebrate in june?! If your child doesn't feel special with December bday, that's on you, your responsibility and your fault. The only thing I can see is delaying a party by a few weeks, so kids aren't on winter break or something. It's so ridiculous, imo.
I don't actually like the baby stage. Like, at all. I count down the days until they can feed themselves and walk and talk. Doesn't mean I'm not excited about having another baby, but mostly because we will have another new person in the family. I love to watch their personality emerge.
I dislike the newborn stage. Give me a 5 mo old baby and I'm much happier!
I'm also going to echo the half birthday stuff. I thought of this uo while reading the thoughts on december babies thread and totally forgot till I read the uo here! I don't get it. Seriously, their bday is in december, so WHY would you celebrate in june?! If your child doesn't feel special with December bday, that's on you, your responsibility and your fault. The only thing I can see is delaying a party by a few weeks, so kids aren't on winter break or something. It's so ridiculous, imo.
I hear that, but I also disagree and maybe it's because I know someone who celebrated half birthdays their entire life and loved it. For them, it was like two birthdays a year. They get a couple presents and a family party in December but they also got a big party in June when all their friends were around and when they could do things like pool parties or other fun outdoor stuff. Their family made it work for them and they loved it. Other families make December work and they love it too (my good friend was born on Xmas, always celebrated then, and loved it too).
For this one I think it's whatever works for the family and whatever makes the kid feel special. As long as the kid grows up loving whatever celebration they have and feel special, I don't really mind the half birthday, real birthday thing.
I have never heard of a half-birthday. Didn't know what that was until a couple up there posted what it was. DH's birthday is in December. He celebrates on his birthday. This kid will be in December and we'll celebrate on the birthday. I don't understand why you would celebrate a birthday not on your birthday?
I wouldn't normally complain but I am super irritated so I this is coming out. I am SO tired of women shaming other women when it comes to how they pregnant. I have PCOS I tried several dietary changes, exercise routines, acupuncture, basically anything my Dr. told me to try I did it. None of it worked for me. I ended up having to do cycles of femara and we got pregnant!! (wohoo)
Then I look at these boards or talk to other people with PCOS who dieted their way to pregnancy. Let me tell you, I am happy for you! I wouldn't wish those treatments on anyone. But seriously if you shame me for not doing it "the natural way" I will loose my shit.
IT IS RUDE! Someone actually commented and said they got pregnant because they didn't "cheat" on their diet. Let's get one thing straight, you don't know me, or if I cheated or not.
I just wish people could acknowledge that some things work for some people and not for others. Be grateful you are pregnant regardless of how you got there and don't make other people feel bad because they didn't do it your way.
end of rant..sorry!
Seriously!!!!!!!!! That is insane!!!!! I dieted, lost 40 lbs.... Nothing.... 6 cycles of clomid and two miscarriages later I had an Hsg picked up my femara and period never started... Pregnant is pregnant how you got that way doesn't matter and if it does, well ladies guess what there are a lot of rude awakenings ahead for you in the future because life is full of complications and compromise and you just need to get over yourself.
I don't actually like the baby stage. Like, at all. I count down the days until they can feed themselves and walk and talk. Doesn't mean I'm not excited about having another baby, but mostly because we will have another new person in the family. I love to watch their personality emerge.
I dislike the newborn stage. Give me a 5 mo old baby and I'm much happier!
Truth. My newborn had colic. Do. Not. Want.
Yup mine too, and reflux for 6 mo...
Same on the reflux. We're trying to wean him down on the Prevacid now at 9 months.
My newborn was absolutely wonderful, I loved it I can't wait for newborn time again. I know I know throw rotten fruit at me its ok. Trust me I'm paying for it now that she is 10 lol
I don't like when people give you things for your baby without asking if you need it or want it. That sounds terrible -- gifts are wonderful, hand-me-downs are awesome -- but for a first time mom, don't make them feel obligated to take your stroller or car seat or bassinet because maybe, just maybe they want to do their own research and find one that is right for them. Or maybe, just maybe they can't afford the other attachments of the nice shit you're giving them and it will force them to spend money they don't want to.
I have a few people who are pulling together clothes, shoes, toys, etc. All fine. Especially because they said, "hey, if you want, we can pull some stuff together for you that we still have from our youngest." But we also have a few that are like, "here, take this. It's great. You'll love it." It's hard to say no and then you feel obligated to use it ... and it's just, ugh.
Not ungrateful, just a new mom who wants to figure some of this shit out on my own thank you very much!
This^! My mother-in-law will not stop buying stuff! I'm not going to get to pick anything out because she's already bought so much! I love her and I'm happy she's excited about another grandbaby, but this is my first baby! Also, we lost our first one, so I didn't want anyone buying anything until we had an ultrasound to make sure everything was ok. US is not scheduled until 12 weeks (next Thursday).
Luckily no one has tried to force hand-me-downs on me. Like you, I have no problem with used stuff, I just don't want to feel obligated to take something I don't really want.
My UO I'm dealing with right now...I work at a small school with a tight knit group of coworkers but I hate being the center of attention. I have told 3 people at work so far and they have all sworn secrecy but they keep wanting to plan this big elaborate reveal to the rest of the st at our next employee luncheon (I'll be 13 weeks at this point). I feel so awkward telling a big group of people that I'm pregnant. My coworker even wants me to put my ultrasounds on my room door so people can see it when they walk by (um NO!!). They all think I'm crazy for not wanting everyone to know about everything going on with my pregnancy. I just want to tell a small group of coworkers I'm closest to and let the news trickle through from there. I do love all my coworkers but I'm just more private about my personal life and a little shy when it comes to big announcements.
As the oldest of 3 girls who were always dressed alike, I absolutely HATE that trend. I don't like twins wearing the exact same thing constantly much less girls who aren't the same age.
Number two: I think doing things like half birthday bashes are the types of things that lead to the entitlement generation we have now. Things are not always going to be exactly how you want them. It's a fact of life. Learning how to navigate life's troubles makes you a better person.
Re: UO!
I do think I'll enjoy registering for baby stuff and getting nice stuff
So as usual, I agree @BostonBaby1! I agree with most of the uo, haha, except for not wanting to use the search function
Mine for today is this.
I don't like when people give you things for your baby without asking if you need it or want it. That sounds terrible -- gifts are wonderful, hand-me-downs are awesome -- but for a first time mom, don't make them feel obligated to take your stroller or car seat or bassinet because maybe, just maybe they want to do their own research and find one that is right for them. Or maybe, just maybe they can't afford the other attachments of the nice shit you're giving them and it will force them to spend money they don't want to.
I have a few people who are pulling together clothes, shoes, toys, etc. All fine. Especially because they said, "hey, if you want, we can pull some stuff together for you that we still have from our youngest." But we also have a few that are like, "here, take this. It's great. You'll love it." It's hard to say no and then you feel obligated to use it ... and it's just, ugh.
Not ungrateful, just a new mom who wants to figure some of this shit out on my own thank you very much!
Other UO for the day is people trying to force their ideas down your throat. My sister is a big fan of this. She feels she has to educate me because she has 2 children, no your not educating, your making it about you, and trying to force me to make the same choices you did. This is why I am not speaking with her as my blood pressure is low now but I'm on baby aspirin for my risk of preeclampsia which she almost died not once but twice from, and we almost lost my nephew from. Can we say people need to be understanding on stress, I may be able to do 99% of what I did before I was pregnant, but handle your stress is in that 1%. She also trying to tag along on my parents meeting me 1/2 way from her house to mine when they visiting her from NY. I'm not speaking to you, im not going to your house, what makes you think I want to see you....
Ok pregnancy hormones rant over for now.
I hate the half birthdays too, I'm a February baby and my two younger sisters are August babies-so there was no way that my mom was going to do two birthday parties and a half b day party in the month of August! (Plus my mom's b day is in August lol)
Registering for baby shower is exciting and you should definitely do it! Believe me sweetheart, you are not the type of person that is pissing me off. I'm sure that you will do the considerate thing which will be to put some high-priced items on your registry as well as some more affordable choices for people that can't spend as much :-) there will be people that will want to spend a lot of money on you and your LO and not only is that fine, it's wonderful! Especially because you will get things that you might not be able to get otherwise. Also, people want to celebrate you and that's a great thing! It's the people that expect constant gifts being given forever that elicited my rant.
Love you!
Oh, and my other UO... Please use the search function!
I haven't checked those out yet but I'm definitely going to do it right now!!! So excited. Thanks for sharing!!
I'm sorry that you feel that or anyone made you feel that way. It's true, what works for one may not work for another. Yay for being pregnant!!
I sure hope that's not a uo.
I don't actually like the baby stage. Like, at all. I count down the days until they can feed themselves and walk and talk. Doesn't mean I'm not excited about having another baby, but mostly because we will have another new person in the family. I love to watch their personality emerge.
So sorry someone made you feel that way!!! It's complete BS!! I have PCOS. I believe in healthy eating and I tried it too!! Didn't cheat - didn't work! Ugh!!! I hate when people push remedies on you then get mad at YOU because it didn't work! I got pregnant with a lot of prayer and a lot of Metformin. Clomid would have been our next step of Metformin alone hadn't worked. (I have insulin resistance). Totally would have done Femara if that had been the RE's drug of choice.
Congrats on your baby!! No matter how you conceived!! I consider us the lucky ones since the drugs worked!!
Jamie
Luckily no one has tried to force hand-me-downs on me. Like you, I have no problem with used stuff, I just don't want to feel obligated to take something I don't really want.
Number two: I think doing things like half birthday bashes are the types of things that lead to the entitlement generation we have now. Things are not always going to be exactly how you want them. It's a fact of life. Learning how to navigate life's troubles makes you a better person.