It's Thursday right? {UO}

notkateanymore · May 2014

Did Kimbus go into labor?

Whatca got?

notkateanymore · May 2014

I think all the charities that Donald Sterling donated money to should totally keep it. Why give the bastard back his money? He deserve to be without as much money as possible.

Andrewsgal · May 2014

I think part of being a parent is doing things you don't like for your kids. I judge you if you say your kid will never do something because you don't like it.

Andrewsgal · May 2014

People who don't understand the first amendment are automatically un friended by me, I don't like dumb people.

dmartin726 · May 2014

Andrewsgal said:
I think part of being a parent is doing things you don't like for your kids. I judge you if you say your kid will never do something because you don't like it.

Yes this! I will complain to someone that I was doing something with DD that I don't love doing and get "well then why do it". Um because it makes my child happy so I sit there and smile. For her. There's definitely different types of parents out there.

barnwife · May 2014

I haven't seen Frozen...and have no desire to.

Andrewsgal · May 2014

barnwife said:

I haven't seen Frozen...and have no desire to.

your kids might like it.

barnwife · May 2014

@Andrewsgal...You are right - they might. But since they've never watched anything longer than a 15 minute show (a Spanish children's program), I am not going to worry about it. Especially because A. sat for about 3 minutes and then ran to play.

And J. was definitely restless by the end.

As we don't have a TV, sitting still for a show/movie that's longer than a quick youtube video is something that is foreign to them.

Also, I completely agree with the sleep training kids younger than a year. At that point (at least with ours so far) sleep is all over the place due to milestones. And nothing seems to make a permanent difference.

Andrewsgal · May 2014

We have so argued this to death but after DS kindergarten round up and assessment the other day I seriously think you are smoking crack if you don't think your kid needs preschool for at least a year. The teacher assessing DS stopped after like 60 seconds and said "he is in preschool isn't he? I can always tell and it makes kindergarten so much easier for them."

Andrewsgal · May 2014

I sleep trained DS at 9 months and DD at a year to this day they are awesome sleepers. Sure we might have redone it but it doesn't mean it didn't work. If necessary I will sleep train this one too. I think people grossly underestimate the necessity of sleep in everything developmental. I also seriously side eye typically developing toddlers who are still up multiple times a night. I hunk some children need to be taught to put themselves back to sleep.

MomIn2013 · May 2014

Andrewsgal said:

I think part of being a parent is doing things you don't like for your kids. I judge you if you say your kid will never do something because you don't like it.

Agree. DH and I have been known to spend a good hour or so on a Saturday afternoon wandering around the Super Pet store (with no pet and no intentions of getting a pet) just so DS can look at all the animals. Not where I'd like to spend my day, but the look on DS' face is priceless.

notkateanymore · May 2014

Exactly @auroraloo‌

Keeptruckin · May 2014

The sleep thing is hard. I 100 percent believe in sleep training. Saying that, some kids are just bad sleepers. We really tried hard to develop good sleep habits. Never rocked to sleep, or nursed to sleep, we read every book there was. I finally had to face she would sleep through the night when she did, not on anyone else's schedule. I guess if we hadn't worked to develop good sleep hygiene she would still be a sucky sleeper, so I get where you are coming from.

kcisthebombdotcom · May 2014

I kind of go both ways on sleep training (obviously of kids 6+ months). I do think it should be a last resort (speaking of CIO). I think some infants have such fractured sleep they need it. I think for many the parent is forcing a child into a developmental milestone they're not ready for and it's sad.

raraavis28 · May 2014

Usm123 said:

I think part of being a parent is doing things you don't like for your kids. I judge you if you say your kid will never do something because you don't like it.
It makes me sad because the child is probably missing out on so much. What parent enjoys stringing beads, singing the same song 1000x, or reading Fox in Socks? Not me, but DH and I do things together that isn't the other's favorite. How do you see who your child is if you only let them do things YOU enjoy?

"Fox in Socks" is awesome! I guess there's my UO.

:-P

No comment on sleep-training. I know what worked for us, my kids are decent sleepers for the most part, but definitely have erratic patterns at times (like right now....they crashed hard for their morning nap every day this week, but since we have a play-date today, of course they're fighting it.....). I feel like there are definite bad habits that one can get into, but that there are also multiple methods that can work or are necessary for certain kids. This is for sure one area where I'm less judgmental after going through it.

And as far as the "my world doesn't revolve around my kids" thing.....wasn't it a thing lately on this board to judge people who "don't have a life outside of their kids"? Are we going in circles? Or are we judging extremes? If so, count me in.....as usual, I'm Team Middle Ground. :-P

MamaKct · May 2014

amy052006 said:

Andrewsgal said:

We have so argued this to death but after DS kindergarten round up and assessment the other day I seriously think you are smoking crack if you don't think your kid needs preschool for at least a year. The teacher assessing DS stopped after like 60 seconds and said "he is in preschool isn't he? I can always tell and it makes kindergarten so much easier for them."

I feel like most of the anti-preschool crowd is gone now, right?

I am definitely not anti-preschool. Both of my older kids went for one year but my DD did not go. She will start Kindergarten in the fall and I was asked the same question at her evaluation.

Oh and I do not smoke crack.

nonoemily · May 2014

amy052006 said:

Notchotchke said:

Andrewsgal said:

We have so argued this to death but after DS kindergarten round up and assessment the other day I seriously think you are smoking crack if you don't think your kid needs preschool for at least a year. The teacher assessing DS stopped after like 60 seconds and said "he is in preschool isn't he? I can always tell and it makes kindergarten so much easier for them."

This is a thing? I didn't realize that people skipped preschool. DD is starting in an 18 mo program when #2 arrives. It's only 1-2 half days (we aren't sure if we want to send her for 2 days yet) but I feel like it'll be important for her to socialize especially those first 3 months where we are finding a new normal.

It's totally a thing.

Around here, I think we see more of the people whop have a choice and just chose not to do it.

Locally, here in a major city, it's an issue because there is no public pre-school outside of Head Start. So you get way to many kids who fall in between the gap of qualifying for Head Start and being able to afford a private program.

Preschool here is so expensive. Even a two day a week co-op program. We are looking at all our options right now, because straight up private preschool is beyond what we can afford.

rachie1019 · May 2014

amy052006 said:

Andrewsgal said:

We have so argued this to death but after DS kindergarten round up and assessment the other day I seriously think you are smoking crack if you don't think your kid needs preschool for at least a year. The teacher assessing DS stopped after like 60 seconds and said "he is in preschool isn't he? I can always tell and it makes kindergarten so much easier for them."

I feel like most of the anti-preschool crowd is gone now, right?

Was there an actual anti-preschool crowd? WTH. DS benefits greatly from preschool.

magentawarped · May 2014

MermaidsMagic said:

DC2London said:

This one might get me kicked off of the board. I finally saw Frozen. Anna kicks ass...Elsa? Not so much. And I have nothing but love for Idina Menzel, but good god they wrote that song so that she has to sing at the top of her voice and it just comes off as shrill. And I don't really think that the voice matches the character.

I also think their parents are monsters for locking her in a room and instead of trying to help her control her powers, teach her to shove them deep down, even though it isn't work, but keep it up because that's what needs to happen. Also why did Anna have to be locked up too? She could have gone out into the world.

There's a large group of people who think this movie is a metaphor for homosexuality and coming out. I can see it.

Along the Frozen theme, I'm kind of hating that everyone keeps saying that Elsa is the first Disney girl who doesn't need a man. Have we already forgotten about Merida? Merida fought tooth and nail to not be forced into an arranged marriage, and people accused her of being a lesbian. Elsa has no relationships with anyone because of her parents and her own distorted self-perception, and she's a hero for that? Just because she has a cool song? I think that's warped.

Andrewsgal · May 2014

I love how every time the preschool argument is brought up someone comes here and is like my kid is so ready she is reading. Yes because that's what makes a kid ready for kinder and your kid is the special snowflake. Um okay.

spring_time · May 2014

marchesa28 said:

Usm123 said:

I think part of being a parent is doing things you don't like for your kids. I judge you if you say your kid will never do something because you don't like it.
It makes me sad because the child is probably missing out on so much. What parent enjoys stringing beads, singing the same song 1000x, or reading Fox in Socks? Not me, but DH and I do things together that isn't the other's favorite. How do you see who your child is if you only let them do things YOU enjoy?

"Fox in Socks" is awesome! I guess there's my UO. :-P

No comment on sleep-training. I know what worked for us, my kids are decent sleepers for the most part, but definitely have erratic patterns at times (like right now....they crashed hard for their morning nap every day this week, but since we have a play-date today, of course they're fighting it.....). I feel like there are definite bad habits that one can get into, but that there are also multiple methods that can work or are necessary for certain kids. This is for sure one area where I'm less judgmental after going through it.

And as far as the "my world doesn't revolve around my kids" thing.....wasn't it a thing lately on this board to judge people who "don't have a life outside of their kids"? Are we going in circles? Or are we judging extremes? If so, count me in.....as usual, I'm Team Middle Ground. :-P

I was kind of thinking the same thing. Where are all the cries of Mommy Martyr that get thrown around when someone says they feel uncomfortable leaving their one month old home for an evening out with friends? Isn't it kind of the same thing?

Of course, that middle ground is a nice place to be settled :-)

notkateanymore · May 2014

Sometimes I feel like I don't live on the same planet as some posters on the board...and I'm not the weird one.

peaceinnature · May 2014

Frozen: I got the impression that Elsa's parents wanted her to learn to control her powers when she was older and could handle it better. But then they died before they could help her with that. Anyway, not the best parenting choice, but I think that's the explanation.

Preschool: The US definitely needs a better public preschool program. It does make a huge difference and it's sad that so many people can't afford quality early education.

Sleep training: I totally agree with taking the wait and see approach before 1, unless the sleep situation is totally wrecking you. But DS was totally like that, we used to rock him to sleep in the Ergo for almost every nap and bedtime and I thought about sleep training A LOT. But then one day when he was about 10 months he just didn't need it anymore. And he's gone down in his crib every night since. (Not always easily, but never needed to rock him again, is what I meant.)

MamaKct · May 2014

Andrewsgal said:

I love how every time the preschool argument is brought up someone comes here and is like my kid is so ready she is reading. Yes because that's what makes a kid ready for kinder and your kid is the special snowflake. Um okay.

I am guessing you are referring to me since I am the only one that said my DD didn't go. I also don't think I said she didn't go because she could already read? I didn't state any reasons actually, just said she isn't going. It's ok though, you can feel sorry for her and her teachers, I am confident she will be just fine.

penguingrrl · May 2014

We took on debt in order to send Emma to preschool because it's that important. We'll easily repay that debt in the next year now that DH is finally earning a professional salary, and Emma would not easily gain the skills she has gotten over the past two years. The amount it would have put her behind starting elementary school without preschool would have cascaded for years. I do think it's irresponsible not to put your kid in school prior to K and will hurt your kid in the long run.

chelseymat · May 2014

I seriously side eye the dog lovers in my Facebook feed. Don't get me wrong I love my dog but these people donating money for prosthetics for a stray dog that got hit by a car are just crazy. There are people all over the world, real human people, in desperate need of prosthesis and they are donating to a dog? Put the dog to sleep. It's a dog.

MamaKct · May 2014

cjcouple said:

MamaKct said:

Andrewsgal said:

I love how every time the preschool argument is brought up someone comes here and is like my kid is so ready she is reading. Yes because that's what makes a kid ready for kinder and your kid is the special snowflake. Um okay.

I am guessing you are referring to me since I am the only one that said my DD didn't go. I also don't think I said she didn't go because she could already read? I didn't state any reasons actually, just said she isn't going. It's ok though, you can feel sorry for her and her teachers, I am confident she will be just fine.

I don't want to pick on you, but imagine how much of an advantage she would have had after a year of preschool?

I did that. Before I made the decision. After sending 2 kids though the preschool programs here, I didn't really see one with her. It's not just that I don't think she needs it because she is so awesome, I just didn't see the advantages to it. She has gone through her evaluations and again the teachers assumed she was in preschool. So really in HER case, I made the decision that was best for her. I am not saying that kids in general don't benefit from it at all. I do respect a parent's decision about their individual kid though.

lexusolsen · May 2014

I have two SAHM friends. We have known each other since our dd's were six months old. I no longer SAH but we still see them once a month during the school year and once a week during school breaks. They are always in awe of dd. She isn't special she just goes to preschool. She does all the same things the other kids in her class do- things my friends' kids don't do. They have decided that the $150 a month for two half days of preschool is too much and they will homeschool their kids for preschool... So they turned to Pinterest. I'm curious how they think a bunch of random Pinterest activities will educate their children. Will they be fun? Yes! Will they learn something? Maybe. Does Pinterest replace preschool? No!

Andrewsgal · May 2014

MamaKct said:

cjcouple said:

MamaKct said:

Andrewsgal said:

I love how every time the preschool argument is brought up someone comes here and is like my kid is so ready she is reading. Yes because that's what makes a kid ready for kinder and your kid is the special snowflake. Um okay.

I am guessing you are referring to me since I am the only one that said my DD didn't go. I also don't think I said she didn't go because she could already read? I didn't state any reasons actually, just said she isn't going. It's ok though, you can feel sorry for her and her teachers, I am confident she will be just fine.

I don't want to pick on you, but imagine how much of an advantage she would have had after a year of preschool?

I did that. Before I made the decision. After sending 2 kids though the preschool programs here, I didn't really see one with her. It's not just that I don't think she needs it because she is so awesome, I just didn't see the advantages to it. She has gone through her evaluations and again the teachers assumed she was in preschool. So really in HER case, I made the decision that was best for her. I am not saying that kids in general don't benefit from it at all. I do respect a parent's decision about their individual kid though.

I really hope your choice is not detrimental to your child but I doubt it. Also you truly won't know your child is ready for kinder until they are there. I just don't understand being willing to gamble your child's early education because you don't see the benefits of something that is research backed.

Aussie45 · May 2014

Andrewsgal said:

I think part of being a parent is doing things you don't like for your kids. I judge you if you say your kid will never do something because you don't like it.

We were at Build-a-Bear over the weekend. While standing in line, the little girl behind us (maybe 7 or so) asked her mom if she could go get a sound for her bear. The mom replied, "NO, I will NOT have toys that make noise. Uh uh, no way." I get not wanting to have a ton of toys that make noise, but the way she said it made it to where I noticed it and cringed on the inside.

Aussie45 · May 2014

Diapers&Wipes said:

I'll play today. I think sleep training a kid under say 1 is silly unless you expect to do it again at some point. Unless my kids are an anomaly, they seem to learn all of their skills overnight. B has gone from being a great sleeper to a bad sleeper and back and forth. Periods of bad sleep are always followed by some new skill: rolling, crawling and then he goes back to his normal sleep schedule. Let's fight!

I think it definitely depends on the kid. A was sleep trained around 7mo I think, and she hasn't had any problems since then. No more retraining, no sleep problems. Granted, A has always loved her sleep and slept a TON so that might have a lot to do with it. I'll see if my mind gets changed with our second child

Andrewsgal · May 2014

DC2London said:
I see what you guys are trying to say, but in my experience teaching, the kids who struggled the most are those whose parents didn't spend time engaging them in educational activities at home, NOT those who did not attend preschool.

So you noticed no difference as a kinder teacher between kids who attended a quality preschool and those who didn't? Sorry I call BS

penguingrrl · May 2014

DC2London said:

I see what you guys are trying to say, but in my experience teaching, the kids who struggled the most are those whose parents didn't spend time engaging them in educational activities at home, NOT those who did not attend preschool.

I would have no trouble ensuring my children were academically prepared for K. We read a ton, do crafts and do other things that would absolutely ensure they were ready academically.

But my kids absolutely needed time in a setting where they have teachers instead of my or DH, adjusting to circle time, waiting on line and general classroom behavior without me present. There's no substitute for that and by the time kids start K they are expected to have mastered these skills.

lexusolsen · May 2014

DC2London said:
I see what you guys are trying to say, but in my experience teaching, the kids who struggled the most are those whose parents didn't spend time engaging them in educational activities at home, NOT those who did not attend preschool.

So you think that random Pinterest activities replace the curriculum, social interaction and opportunities provided in a structured preschool setting?

Aussie45 · May 2014

I think it's so dumb when people link articles that aren't true. For example (and this is just one example), two of my friends linked that in 2017 obamacare would force people to get microchip implants. It is then bombarded with comments about "Omg Obama sucks!" and "The hell he will!" Uh, how about we snope that shit and see if it's true. Oh wait, it's not. Good thing you got so riled up over a fake news article :-q

CiderWench · May 2014

I don't believe anyone who says there aren't things they won't do for their child(ren). I own the things I won't do for my kids because I am a part of our family with feelings and interests to consider, too, but those things do not surpass the amount of things I am willing to do, and do often.

Andrewsgal · May 2014

CiderWench said:
I don't believe anyone who says there aren't things they won't do for their child(ren). I own the things I won't do for my kids because I am a part of our family with feelings and interests to consider, too, but those things do not surpass the amount of things I am willing to do, and do often.

Honestly if we had the resources and it was important to my children I can't think of anything legal and moral that I wouldn't do.

ginger313 · May 2014

::comes out of lurking::

Preschool-

I feel lucky that the elementary school in my township offers full day (9-3) preschool 5 days a week at $150 a month. I cannot wait to send DD there, as I am not a trained teacher and think she will get a lot from it. We visit every once in a while and DD absolutely loves it. She tries to get me to leave her there.

That said, I think it is entirely possible for the child to learn academically what they need to prepare for Kindergarten at home. Socially, they need to learn by doing, and unless they have a lot of contact with children in other ways I feel like they will be a little behind.

Sleep training before 1-

I think it depends on the child. Once they are able to self soothe I think it is good to encourage them to be able to put themselves back to sleep, or to sleep in the first place. Placing DD in her crib tired, but still awake and letting her fall asleep on her own instead of rocking her for hours made sleeping and napping a much less stressful time for us both.

Aussie45 · May 2014

UO for our family: (short version) You don't need more cars than people in your house.

(Long version) Our ILs have a truck, a new van, an old van, an even older van, and a small car. MIL's parents just bought SIL a car from SIL's aunt. It was SIL's aunt's old vehicle that she traded in for a new vehicle, but wanted her car kept in the family. WHY when there are 5 vehicles for a 4 person family, did they get a new vehicle? They complain about money and not making enough, and I just roll my eyes. Ya, I'm sure you don't cause insurance for 5 separate cars does get a little spendy. FTR, SIL is 15 and BIL will be 13 so as of right now they are not even driving.

bhuffman · May 2014

Am I the only one who sees preschool as a win for my child and a win for me? I mean, my boys learn so much at preschool, have fun , make friends, and are prepared for K...I get a sanity break! It's a win-win!

alli2672 · May 2014

Andrewsgal said:

I don't believe anyone who says there aren't things they won't do for their child(ren). I own the things I won't do for my kids because I am a part of our family with feelings and interests to consider, too, but those things do not surpass the amount of things I am willing to do, and do often.
Honestly if we had the resources and it was important to my children I can't think of anything legal and moral that I wouldn't do.

I can. I will not watch the batman lego movie more than twice. I cannot sit through it again.

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