Sh*t people say...

charley0624 · February 2014

Long time lurker, gotta chime in, hope y'all dont mind:

--At 21 weeks when I finally started wearing maternity clothes: me "how do I look?" Mom, "maternity clothes werent fitted like that when I was pregnant"

--At 24 weeks, ordering ice cream: cashier: "are you having a boy?" Me, "No girl", cashier "Oh youre so big!". Then checked my ID for credit card purchase and added, "oh pregnancy changed your face, you dont look like that anymore, your nose is bigger".

--Yesterday, 29 weeks, mom again: shoves diet pills in my face after having a long discussion about how she thinks my niece needs to lose weight. Me "you cant give my niece those!" Mom "they arent for her, I was showing you for after when you have the baby"

Awesome. Not to mention that when I first announced, one of my bosses asked me if I knew who the father was. FML.

IBackBevo · February 2014

I just got a new one. Just now. And it isn't even pregnancy related. A woman and I are standing next to each other in the pharmacy...imo, we are probably about the same age...early 30s. One tech asks the other who the RX is for. The douche dude tech says, "It is for the young one. " He was referring to the other woman. WTF?!?!?!!!! For some reason, this really insulted me. There are many things I am insecure about, but looking old is not one of them...until today!

Mamazon2014 · February 2014

MIL during our car ride to go shopping ogether on Sunday:

Me: I am starting to feel really big.

MIL: Greg (DH) and I were just joking about how you're starting to get as wide as you are tall!

Me:....

I'm 6'3, the mental image of this is horrifying, especially when I still have 12 weeks left. That's it! I'm not going out in public until this kid gets here!

I would have been completely pissed of it was anyone else saying it, but we're pretty close and I know she only meant it as a tease, it just stung a tiny bit.

lauralou3x3 · February 2014

When I was only about 6-10 weeks pregnant, my MIL always said "oh look you're finally looking pregnant". I would say "um no, that's just bad bloat". She would always say "no trust me that's all baby". Pretty sure the baby was the size of a bean or smaller. It was bloat. Luckily she normally never says that kind of stuff bc I love her dearly.

CamrynnsMommy · February 2014

lissym17 said:

talkthewholetime said:

ErBear1010 said:

lissym17 said:
My boyfriends sister: do you have a name picked out yet?
My boyfriend: Kenzye
Boyfriends sister: hahaa kenz-yieee! I don't like it, poor child
Me: (eye roll) [wanting to slap her]
Ummm how do you pronounce that name?

I'm with @erbear1010- is it like Kenzie or Kenz-yay (like Kanye)?

"It's like Kenzie but with a y instead of an I"

Phonetically though it will likely be pronounced Kenz-yay. Why not just Kenzy?

danabsd · February 2014

CamrynnsMommy said:

ErBear1010 said:

My boyfriends sister: do you have a name picked out yet? My boyfriend: Kenzye Boyfriends sister: hahaa kenz-yieee! I don't like it, poor child Me: (eye roll) [wanting to slap her]
Ummm how do you pronounce that name?

I'm with @erbear1010- is it like Kenzie or Kenz-yay (like Kanye)?
"It's like Kenzie but with a y instead of an I"
Phonetically though it will likely be pronounced Kenz-yay. Why not just Kenzy?

Or Kenzie? OR better yet McKenzie nn Kenzie.

Ain't nothing wrong with being unique not YOUnique.

mrt · February 2014

I got the twins question the other day from a woman at work who has twins! Complete with mouth wide open look of shock when i said no.

Cupcakes89 · February 2014

I go crazy when I'm told I'm not showing. I want to rip off my shirt and be like LOOK!

Everytime my MIL sees me she says how my belly is too soft still and that I'm barely showing. She doesn't believe I've gained 20 lbs ( at least last time I told her )... maybe when she gets back into the state she will see I'm showing....

spacepotatoes · February 2014

Kimbus22 said:

lissym17 said:

Ummm how do you pronounce that name?

I'm with @erbear1010- is it like Kenzie or Kenz-yay (like Kanye)?
"It's like Kenzie but with a y instead of an I" Phonetically though it will likely be pronounced Kenz-yay. Why not just Kenzy? Or Kenzie? OR better yet McKenzie nn Kenzie.

Ain't nothing wrong with being unique not YOUnique.
I personally just like it spelled with a Y instead of an I. It's pronounced exactly the same as Kenzie so I'm going with Kenzye. Thanks for your advice and all but I don't see any harm in the name or anything after all she is my daughter. : ) (It's like my name is Alissa and normally people spell it Alyssa with a y) nothing to unique about that.

QUOTE FAIL
I think the difference here is that Alissa is still easily pronounceable. They were just pointing out that Kenzye is going to throw most everyone who tries to say it so you might want to consider a more typical spelling of what is already a "unique" name on it's own. She's your daughter and you can obviously name her what you want. But she'll be the one correcting people all the time. Just might make sense to make it easier for her.

This. That particular combination of letters doesn't phonetically produce the same sound in this case, which does tend to throw people off. Go for it if you love it. But like Kimbus said, both you and your daughter will probably be having this conversation many times in the future.

getitdone · February 2014

My Mom keeps reminding me that with her 3 kids and when my sister was pg with her 4 kids, they never got big bellies. Well they both are much heavier than I am when not pg. I am built like my dad so I am tall and lean so pg, my belly seems pretty big. It just always feels like she is judging me because my belly is more pronounced.

jenniferroshto · February 2014

cbrust said:
was checking out at the grocery store the other day, the cashier was an older woman, probably late 50's/early 60's.

cashier: "do you know if it's a boy or girl?"
me: "it's a girl."
cashier: "Do you have a name?"
me: "Macie"
cashier: "oh heavens, I don't like that name at all!"
me: "well, good thing it's not your child then!" bitch glare

Well I personally love it of that helps! I guess I'm right there with you, we are naming this LO Maycee

MommyDay2be · February 2014

I get the popular "you must be ready to pop" nope still have about 11 weeks "oh wow! You are going to have a HUGE baby!" ...I've only gained 10 pounds, and my baby is about 2 1/2-3 of those... Plus I gained 40 pounds with my first so way to ruin my happiness!

LeeLee86 · February 2014

When I first announced: my mom "yay you're finally going to be fatter than me" At 22wks: my father " we'll you are finally getting fat"
What is wrong with my parents??!
My DH when the OB told me I gained 11lbs "she's crazy I don't see it"
That's why I love him

KBowen715 · February 2014

IBackBevo said:
I just got a new one. Just now. And it isn't even pregnancy related. A woman and I are standing next to each other in the pharmacy...imo, we are probably about the same age...early 30s. One tech asks the other who the RX is for. The douche dude tech says, "It is for the young one. " He was referring to the other woman. WTF?!?!?!!!! For some reason, this really insulted me. There are many things I am insecure about, but looking old is not one of them...until today!

Would. Have. Murdered.

Ladiebug710 · February 2014

crystalmir91385 said:

cbrust said:

was checking out at the grocery store the other day, the cashier was an older woman, probably late 50's/early 60's.

cashier: "do you know if it's a boy or girl?"
me: "it's a girl."
cashier: "Do you have a name?"
me: "Macie"
cashier: "oh heavens, I don't like that name at all!"
me: "well, good thing it's not your child then!" bitch glare

I'm sorry, but at least it was a stranger. When I told my Mom, yes my own mother, what we were naming DS she started to cry and said, "well that's awful."
And that's why we aren't telling anyone. Hope your mom got over it.

I had mentally prepared myself for this type of reaction. There was a reason I never asked for her input during the naming process. She had just never met a Keegan, now that she has heard of others she stopped saying I ruined his life with a stupid name. Can't pick your family.

Bootsie327 · February 2014

KBowen715 said:

I just got a new one. Just now. And it isn't even pregnancy related. A woman and I are standing next to each other in the pharmacy...imo, we are probably about the same age...early 30s. One tech asks the other who the RX is for. The douche dude tech says, "It is for the young one. " He was referring to the other woman. WTF?!?!?!!!! For some reason, this really insulted me. There are many things I am insecure about, but looking old is not one of them...until today!
Would. Have. Murdered.

OMG me too...that a-hole needs to be slapped.

spacepotatoes · February 2014

mary97 said:

My bil suggested that we try the Bradley Method for childbirth, sorry I don't want a man's opinion on childbirth methods. Especially one thats a natural birth method.

I'm not sure I understand your issue with this. Just the fact that it came from a man? Or the fact that it's a natural method?

I can see being irritated if it was presented in a rude way and yeah, I'd side-eye it if it came from a man with zero experience at all (indirect, obviously). But the Bradley method is legit and a lot of ladies here would suggest it too, if asked. Does this guy have a partner who did it?

mirdamae03 · February 2014

Oh I have another one. So DS1's middle name is DH, his dad, his gpa, ggpa, etc. MN (Andrew), and I wanted to do something special with DS2's middle name for my family. We are keeping it a secret that we're using my dad and grandpa's MN (Lynwood). So around Christmas time, my mom and I are in the car headed to go shopping.

Mom: So what's Dean's middle name going to be?

Me: I can't tell you. It's going to be a surprise that we'll announce after he's born.

Mom: Oh ok, well as long as it's not Lynwood.

Me: #-o

spacepotatoes · February 2014

mary97 said:

I was commenting on a man suggesting a natural birth method, not the method itself. I have no issues with anyone using this method or wanting as much pain meds they can have.

I'm totally with you on the freedom of choice when it comes to methods. I just don't really agree with the assumption that anyone who has a penis must be completely clueless about childbirth. Certainly, I wouldn't be down with my husband or any man trying to dictate my choices but the fact that they can't actually give birth doesn't mean they can't be informed or be able to relate something about the process went if their partner has been through it, especially if they were present for the birth and/or attended classes with their partners. You haven't said whether this particular man does have any of that experience, but if he does, I wouldn't just dismiss it outright because it's coming from a man.

ArmyMedic7588 · February 2014

I was away with my military company for drill weekend, a girl who used to be in our company is now out of the military but works with the dental people as a civilian contractor. I had to go through my yearly medical exam and said hi to her...

Lady: hey how are you doing?!

Me: Great, a little tired lately. But baby and I are good!

Lady: Yeah I bet you're tired, you look like you're gonna pop any day now! You're so big!

Me: Umm my due date is May 27th, just hit 3rd trimester.

Lady: Oh.... I'm due mid march

Me: (thinking... wtf you knew this about me time we saw each other... 2 weeks ago! She's not even showing. Why do pregnant women say things like this to each other!? Sorry I'm not super tall like you and carry all of baby in front of me

)

julie921 · February 2014

My MIL hadn't seen me in a couple weeks and when she did she said, "oh my, what are you due tomorrow?!" I still had 14 weeks to go. This was in a room full of other family members and they were pretty outraged she said that and she failed to see the faux pas. She proceeded to tell me what a compliment it was. Yeah, big compliment that at 26 weeks you think I look 40 weeks.

Pirincessamberjoy · February 2014

We went on our hospital tour last night. As my oldest (age 12) is hugging me and saying "mom, is the baby kicking" and the other kiddo (age 8) is repeatedly chattering to his dad, a woman looked at me and asked if this was my first baby. Uh, are these two kids standing here hallucinations??

ehowa499 · February 2014

I had a 5 year old tell me yesterday "I know you are pregnant because you have a huge bump on your stomach." Then he looked at me again and said "I'm really sorry, I hope that I didn't offend you when I said that." I thought it was adorable. And kudos to his parents for obviously teaching him some manners and how to effectively say sorry!

oscarwao · February 2014

ArmyMedic7588 said:

I was away with my military company for drill weekend, a girl who used to be in our company is now out of the military but works with the dental people as a civilian contractor. I had to go through my yearly medical exam and said hi to her...
Lady: hey how are you doing?!
Me: Great, a little tired lately. But baby and I are good!
Lady: Yeah I bet you're tired, you look like you're gonna pop any day now! You're so big!
Me: Umm my due date is May 27th, just hit 3rd trimester.
Lady: Oh.... I'm due mid march
Me: (thinking... wtf you knew this about me time we saw each other... 2 weeks ago! She's not even showing. Why do pregnant women say things like this to each other!? Sorry I'm not super tall like you and carry all of baby in front of me )

ooooo biatch is competing in the pregnancy beauty olympics apparently. *Throatpunch*

awc1986 · February 2014

DH's grandma: "yes, you can tell you're pregnant because your face is fatter".

I was 11 weeks and had lost weight from ms.

Why do old ladies think they can talk like 14yo bitches?

ArmyMedic7588 · February 2014

kimberlykl2009 said:

ArmyMedic7588 said:

I was away with my military company for drill weekend, a girl who used to be in our company is now out of the military but works with the dental people as a civilian contractor. I had to go through my yearly medical exam and said hi to her...
Lady: hey how are you doing?!
Me: Great, a little tired lately. But baby and I are good!
Lady: Yeah I bet you're tired, you look like you're gonna pop any day now! You're so big!
Me: Umm my due date is May 27th, just hit 3rd trimester.
Lady: Oh.... I'm due mid march
Me: (thinking... wtf you knew this about me time we saw each other... 2 weeks ago! She's not even showing. Why do pregnant women say things like this to each other!? Sorry I'm not super tall like you and carry all of baby in front of me )

ooooo biatch is competing in the pregnancy beauty olympics apparently. *Throatpunch*

I obviously win though cause I have a super cute bump and she's not showing... Although I may not say that in 3 months from now haha

oscarwao · February 2014

ashtog said:

1) Dropping DS2 off at preschool, I had to turn down a mom who was inquiring about booking photos of her son as I will be on mat leave during the time she wants them.
" Oh, you're pregnant? I thought you just gained 10 or more lbs. my face never gained when *I* was pregnant." my belly is like a basketball outside of my shirt.. I can't tell if she thought she was being funny..

yeah, I suggest you find someone else to take photos of your little crotchdropping you ignorant woman..

2) My sister who is 26 and has no children was over with her boyfriend and talking about how all the zumba etc she's doing is making her bum look so " juicy"
Me " maybe I'll try that after baby is born"
sister " Oh Ash.. you've had babies, I don't think there's any coming back from that. Besides you're a mom, no one expects you to look good anymore. "

I am 26. I do not understand other 26 year-olds with this mindset. Also, I would never describe my own butt as "juicy" no matter how much I hit gym.

oscarwao · February 2014

ashtog said:

kimberlykl2009 said:

ashtog said:

1) Dropping DS2 off at preschool, I had to turn down a mom who was inquiring about booking photos of her son as I will be on mat leave during the time she wants them.
" Oh, you're pregnant? I thought you just gained 10 or more lbs. my face never gained when *I* was pregnant." my belly is like a basketball outside of my shirt.. I can't tell if she thought she was being funny..

yeah, I suggest you find someone else to take photos of your little crotchdropping you ignorant woman..

2) My sister who is 26 and has no children was over with her boyfriend and talking about how all the zumba etc she's doing is making her bum look so " juicy"
Me " maybe I'll try that after baby is born"
sister " Oh Ash.. you've had babies, I don't think there's any coming back from that. Besides you're a mom, no one expects you to look good anymore. "

I am 26. I do not understand other 26 year-olds with this mindset. Also, I would never describe my own butt as "juicy" no matter how much I hit gym.

Sorry, I didn't mean to offend. I am 29 and have never had this mindset either lol. I suppose I could have just said my *younger * sister. She is a special kind of girl though, love her to death she just doesn't often think before she speaks.. Oh yes. Juicy, bangin, smexy.. these are all words that SHE uses to describe her butt. whenever I am around.. lol

Oh not offended! Just saying I don't get how other 26 year olds could think like that, though I do kind of love the word smexy

bumpuser9353653 · February 2014

ehowa499 said:
I had a 5 year old tell me yesterday "I know you are pregnant because you have a huge bump on your stomach." Then he looked at me again and said "I'm really sorry, I hope that I didn't offend you when I said that."

I thought it was adorable. And kudos to his parents for obviously teaching him some manners and how to effectively say sorry!

This is adorable. I love when kids are courteous and love their parents even more for instilling good manners/values. I want to know their secret!

EmilyGolden1 · February 2014

Kimbus22 said:

lissym17 said:

Ummm how do you pronounce that name?
I'm with @erbear1010- is it like Kenzie or Kenz-yay (like Kanye)?
"It's like Kenzie but with a y instead of an I" Phonetically though it will likely be pronounced Kenz-yay. Why not just Kenzy? Or Kenzie? OR better yet McKenzie nn Kenzie.

Ain't nothing wrong with being unique not YOUnique.
I personally just like it spelled with a Y instead of an I. It's pronounced exactly the same as Kenzie so I'm going with Kenzye. Thanks for your advice and all but I don't see any harm in the name or anything after all she is my daughter. : ) (It's like my name is Alissa and normally people spell it Alyssa with a y) nothing to unique about that.

QUOTE FAIL
I think the difference here is that Alissa is still easily pronounceable. They were just pointing out that Kenzye is going to throw most everyone who tries to say it so you might want to consider a more typical spelling of what is already a "unique" name on it's own. She's your daughter and you can obviously name her what you want. But she'll be the one correcting people all the time. Just might make sense to make it easier for her.

I thought it was gong to be pronounced like Swayze as in Patrick Swayze...Kenzye....I don't know.

LUCKY22 · February 2014

FIL: Have you guys decided on a name?
Me: Yes, Eli

FIL: Haha, no you're not. What are you really naming him?
Me: ::jaw dropped - speechless and sad bc he's normally so sweet.

RachelCA29 · February 2014

LUCKY22 said:

FIL: Have you guys decided on a name?
Me: Yes, Eli
FIL: Haha, no you're not. What are you really naming him?
Me: ::jaw dropped - speechless and sad bc he's normally so sweet.

Eli was our 2nd choice name! It's so classic and classy

danabsd · February 2014

ashtog said:
Sorry, I didn't mean to offend. I am 29 and have never had this mindset either lol. I suppose I could have just said my *younger * sister. She is a special kind of girl though, love her to death she just doesn't often think before she speaks.. Oh yes. Juicy, bangin, smexy.. these are all words that SHE uses to describe her butt. whenever I am around.. lol

The only place the word smexy makes my mind go.

awc1986 · February 2014

Oh I got a good one from DH last night, when discussing my options for pain management. I said I want the option of an epidural and he said "I'd rather you just had the pethidine."

No uterus, no opinion. :-w

mirdamae03 · February 2014

ashtog said:

1) Dropping DS2 off at preschool, I had to turn down a mom who was inquiring about booking photos of her son as I will be on mat leave during the time she wants them.
" Oh, you're pregnant? I thought you just gained 10 or more lbs. my face never gained when *I* was pregnant." my belly is like a basketball outside of my shirt.. I can't tell if she thought she was being funny..

yeah, I suggest you find someone else to take photos of your little crotchdropping you ignorant woman..

2) My sister who is 26 and has no children was over with her boyfriend and talking about how all the zumba etc she's doing is making her bum look so " juicy"
Me " maybe I'll try that after baby is born"
sister " Oh Ash.. you've had babies, I don't think there's any coming back from that. Besides you're a mom, no one expects you to look good anymore. "

DED.

oscarwao · February 2014

At the grocery store, buying groceries and a bottle of wine the older woman bagging literally watched me put my wine on the conveyer belt, watched the cashier ring it up, and yet still turned to me to ask pointedly "is this your wine?" I responded with a cheerful "yes!" But what I really wanted to add was "...and I'm going to drink some of it later."

julesf817 · February 2014

EmilyGolden1 said:

Kimbus22 said:

lissym17 said:

Ummm how do you pronounce that name?
I'm with @erbear1010- is it like Kenzie or Kenz-yay (like Kanye)?
"It's like Kenzie but with a y instead of an I" Phonetically though it will likely be pronounced Kenz-yay. Why not just Kenzy? Or Kenzie? OR better yet McKenzie nn Kenzie.

Ain't nothing wrong with being unique not YOUnique.
I personally just like it spelled with a Y instead of an I. It's pronounced exactly the same as Kenzie so I'm going with Kenzye. Thanks for your advice and all but I don't see any harm in the name or anything after all she is my daughter. : ) (It's like my name is Alissa and normally people spell it Alyssa with a y) nothing to unique about that.

QUOTE FAIL
I think the difference here is that Alissa is still easily pronounceable. They were just pointing out that Kenzye is going to throw most everyone who tries to say it so you might want to consider a more typical spelling of what is already a "unique" name on it's own. She's your daughter and you can obviously name her what you want. But she'll be the one correcting people all the time. Just might make sense to make it easier for her.
I thought it was gong to be pronounced like Swayze as in Patrick Swayze...Kenzye....I don't know.

to me the letter combo zye rhymes with dye, lye, bye etc.

so i'd assume the name was pronounced that way. Ken-zye (rhymes with dye) or Kenz-yay like Kanye.

it would have never occured to me to pronounce that Ken-zie.

mirdamae03 · February 2014

@ashtog, I died from laughing at the "crotchdropping" comment. Ded = dead spelled wrong (purposely)

julesf817 · February 2014

kimberlykl2009 said:

At the grocery store, buying groceries and a bottle of wine the older woman bagging literally watched me put my wine on the conveyer belt, watched the cashier ring it up, and yet still turned to me to ask pointedly "is this your wine?" I responded with a cheerful "yes!" But what I really wanted to add was "...and I'm going to drink some of it later."

This reminds me of when i posted a picture of my dog on instagram, and one of my friends commented "Is that a bottle of wine on your counter??" It was so tiny in the picture i'm not sure how she even saw it.

and it was a bottle of wine, and it was mine, and i told her so. but i felt judged.

oscarwao · February 2014

Jules51814 said:

kimberlykl2009 said:

At the grocery store, buying groceries and a bottle of wine the older woman bagging literally watched me put my wine on the conveyer belt, watched the cashier ring it up, and yet still turned to me to ask pointedly "is this your wine?" I responded with a cheerful "yes!" But what I really wanted to add was "...and I'm going to drink some of it later."

This reminds me of when i posted a picture of my dog on instagram, and one of my friends commented "Is that a bottle of wine on your counter??" It was so tiny in the picture i'm not sure how she even saw it.

and it was a bottle of wine, and it was mine, and i told her so. but i felt judged.

She was judging, I mean why else would she ask that question. Plus, don't you know that as pregnant women we totes aren't supposed to own, purchase, or be near alcohol!? Every time I have purchased alcohol people have been visibly uncomfortable - I bought whiskey in total wine the other day (gift for Dad) and the cashier was super weird about it. Cause ya know, every time I buy something it's for ME - funny those newborn onesies don't fit me....

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