Longest Thread EVER! (aka Random Thoughts Thread )

fireflygirl12 · January 2014

DS1 is a September baby and I'm really glad to not be 8 months pregnant during the summer. It sucks having no energy to do fun outdoors stuff when it's beautiful outside. And you are always so freaking hot!

Although I do miss being able to wear sundresses and flip flops everyday instead of having to layer.

Stace0616 · January 2014

Well I was told that, while I am an AMAZING communicator with clients, I've made too many mistakes in data analyzation for them to want to continue our working relationship. Then there was some bullshit in there about how maybe I could qualify for unemployment, I can get COBRA coverage until after the baby is born. Lots of "we really care about you and your family", "you are an amazing person and we didn't make this decision lightly", etcetera.

I don't need someone to stroke my ego, I need someone to pay me. To work. With all of the hours and years and exams I've had to take to be qualified for that job, it's just such a slap in the face to be told maybe you'd do better working customer service at the corporate call center?

I just have no idea where to go from here. I'm obviously showing even if employers can't ask about it. It will take about a month to start receiving unemployment checks. And we clearly aren't quite at that savings goal of "3 months post-tax income" that I was trying to achieve before going on maternity leave. Which by the way, I found out definitively that I would not have qualified for.

So maybe it is a blessing in disguise? I really do hate this industry for as much as I enjoy educating people about personal finance. I wish I could just get paid to be peoples' friend and give them advice. I was so tired of doing financial plans for people who were the 1% and whose sole goal was to make even more money. I miss helping people who really NEED financial advice and not the kind that involves fancy tax shelters and donations to offset personal capital gains. I miss real people.

fireflygirl12 · January 2014

Stace0616 said:

Well I was told that, while I am an AMAZING communicator with clients, I've made too many mistakes in data analyzation for them to want to continue our working relationship. Then there was some bullshit in there about how maybe I could qualify for unemployment, I can get COBRA coverage until after the baby is born. Lots of "we really care about you and your family", "you are an amazing person and we didn't make this decision lightly", etcetera. I don't need someone to stroke my ego, I need someone to pay me. To work. With all of the hours and years and exams I've had to take to be qualified for that job, it's just such a slap in the face to be told maybe you'd do better working customer service at the corporate call center? I just have no idea where to go from here. I'm obviously showing even if employers can't ask about it. It will take about a month to start receiving unemployment checks. And we clearly aren't quite at that savings goal of "3 months post-tax income" that I was trying to achieve before going on maternity leave. Which by the way, I found out definitively that I would not have qualified for. So maybe it is a blessing in disguise? I really do hate this industry for as much as I enjoy educating people about personal finance. I wish I could just get paid to be peoples' friend and give them advice. I was so tired of doing financial plans for people who were the 1% and whose sole goal was to make even more money. I miss helping people who really NEED financial advice and not the kind that involves fancy tax shelters and donations to offset personal capital gains. I miss real people.

I just want to give you the biggest hug right now! Definitely file for unemployment ASAP so that you can get that started. Did they have documentation to back up their reasoning or is there a possible discrimination issue due to your being pregnant?

Emily041285 · January 2014

aviola329 said:
Got some scary news at my follow up anatomy scan. Might be having an amnio today. Prayers and I'll talk more soon

Thinking of you! Keep us updated!

Bluebird2318 · January 2014

@stace0616 I am sorry.

What a slap in the face...

@aviola329 Thinking of you and keeping everything crossed that your amino results come back clear.

Sisimama10 · January 2014

Stace0616 said:
Well I was told that, while I am an AMAZING communicator with clients, I've made too many mistakes in data analyzation for them to want to continue our working relationship. Then there was some bullshit in there about how maybe I could qualify for unemployment, I can get COBRA coverage until after the baby is born. Lots of "we really care about you and your family", "you are an amazing person and we didn't make this decision lightly", etcetera.

I don't need someone to stroke my ego, I need someone to pay me. To work. With all of the hours and years and exams I've had to take to be qualified for that job, it's just such a slap in the face to be told maybe you'd do better working customer service at the corporate call center?

I just have no idea where to go from here. I'm obviously showing even if employers can't ask about it. It will take about a month to start receiving unemployment checks. And we clearly aren't quite at that savings goal of "3 months post-tax income" that I was trying to achieve before going on maternity leave. Which by the way, I found out definitively that I would not have qualified for.

So maybe it is a blessing in disguise? I really do hate this industry for as much as I enjoy educating people about personal finance. I wish I could just get paid to be peoples' friend and give them advice. I was so tired of doing financial plans for people who were the 1% and whose sole goal was to make even more money. I miss helping people who really NEED financial advice and not the kind that involves fancy tax shelters and donations to offset personal capital gains. I miss real people.

Im so sorry !

MegJ17 · January 2014

@stace0616 huge (((hugs)))). Can you get insurance through your husband? Cobra is crazy expensive considering you don't have a job! Hopefully you find something! Losing my job sucked at the time but turned out to be one if the best things that happened to me!

Stace0616 · January 2014

I mean, I knew I wasn't great at my job but they are also ridiculously over demanding. So I think even someone who was amazing at analysis and was mathematically minded would have struggled. As it is, I am an English/Communications/Family Social Science major who ended up in this industry to make some money between college and law school. But after getting in to law school, decided I didn't want to be a lawyer (because of all the analysis).

I just don't know what is the right fit for me, I guess. I seem to be "good enough" at a lot of things, but what I really excel at is leadership and communication. I'm way better at organizing and delegating than doing the small tasks myself, a big picture person if you will. And my job has been to be a detail-oriented, little tasks person for the past five years. Plus I can read people within 2mins of them opening their mouths, which made me awesome at anything sales and service related, but I wanted a higher paying career than that, so I figured I'd keep taking the next step up in this industry.

Ugh sorry to be such a Debbie Downer! I should just order some Chinese food and think of how to re-do our household budget. I need to DO something instead of just dwell on this.

eireyes · January 2014

@stace0616 That sucks big time. I'm sorry you have to deal with this, and especially now! Maybe you're right, this will be your chance to really find something you love. I was laid off in 2011 and although it sucked, I got a better job I like more because of it. I wouldn't have ever gone looking while still employed, so it was a definite blessing in disguise!

@aviola329 Thinking of you! Fingers crossed for positive results, and update us when you're ready and able!

janice9821 · January 2014

@stace0616 - I'm so sorry! I hope you find something soon that you really love.

@aviola329 - Sending happy thoughts your way for good news going forward.

Stace0616 · January 2014

OMG OMG OMG and he said:

"I know things are a little raw right now, but I hope you'll someday think of me as a friend. And we would obviously LOVE for you to bring little James in once he is born."

Um. No. No baby love for you!

J&NL · January 2014

Wow. That sucks. It's like they were trying to make you feel better but really it was just salt on the wounds. I never understood how people can be so heartless.

katieharpiceland · January 2014

@Stace0616 and @aviola329 Amazingly big hugs and positive thoughts for both of you!!

mrscrcalli · January 2014

AprilMay9 said:

I am in such a rut. I feel like I just come home and lay on my couch every day flipping between the same crappy shows. And I hate the winter. H and I used to go out to eat or for drinks once a week but I haven't felt like it since pregnant. And I miss sitting in my back yard sipping wine after work. It just needs to be summer and I need to be unpregnant.

this is my life

mrscrcalli · January 2014

@stace0616 @aviola329 hugs your way.. >:D<

Stace0616 · January 2014

Nope, it was more like isolated incidents would happen (like when my boss was gone sick for two weeks) and I'd be trying to do as much as I could to keep things running and stuff would fall through the cracks. Like think a lot of little things adding up. IDK, all of the assistants are overloaded and stressed to hell the majority of the time, so I think a break will be good for baby and I.

My plans for the near future are: pajamas, cooking, gestating, reading Games of Thrones finally. Life is going to be good. I just need to shake today off and start focusing on what I really want to do with my life. And in the meantime, enjoy having time to feel baby moving and be a zen environment for his last few months in here!

mrscrcalli · January 2014

i tex my girlfriend about how i got the Britax be agile system and how excited i was bla bla bla and she replied asking if it was a new water filtration system… its like A14 is the only place where people understand me >:D<

Emily041285 · January 2014

I decided to make cupcakes. DH isn't home till Monday night and I don't really care if he gets any or not. I might just try to eat all of them by then out of spite for going on a cruise without me.

Bluebird2318 · January 2014

@stace0616 Good for you, girl, with your positive attitude! There will be better opportunities for you in the future. Definitely enjoy the break if you can, relax, revise the budget, whatever. The best any of us can ever do is have a plan and the will to follow through. After that we have to let life happen. You can definitely turn this into a good thing!

deidremaria · January 2014

I am so sorry @Stace0616 maybe once baby is born you'll be able to find something you love. Good thing you found your mug before those asshats let you go

Mamamonzo · January 2014

@aviola329 lots of hugs and prayers

@stace0616 that sucks! I'm so sorry!

pannk · January 2014

What is with all of the crappy crap today? Seems like everyone is having a no good day. T&P to all of you who need it!

Today my OB said I'm gaining weight too quickly. So I was feeling pretty shitty about that and then out of nowhere my 11w pregnant cousin texts me and asks me how much weight I've gained. I would have thought she would know better. So now I feel even more shitty.

Let's all eat some cake.

Bluebird2318 · January 2014

I definitely need to whip my eating habits into shape. I'll be damned if I give up on the cake, but I do need to justify the extras with a better base diet. Ugh.

Mamamonzo · January 2014

@pannk had the same convo with my doc yesterday!

Also I agree with the crappy crap!! I'm going to add my woe is me moment....
I hate one of the colors we picked for the baby's room. I can't tell DH because I begged for it in the first place and he didn't like it. Augh.

Edit to add

Also my cat just farted on me, she smells so bad.

Bluebird2318 · January 2014

@Mamamonzo Oh no! Have you already painted? I think I would admit to it and take my "I told you so" lumps if there was the chance to change it up.

Stace0616 · January 2014

Aww thanks ladies! You really know how to make a girl's day turn around

DH got us Oreo and Snickers cupcakes along with Chinese food to cheer me up, and showed me my own budget numbers to prove that I really do not need to work until the baby is at least 5 months old, maybe even longer if we do a good job with discretionary spending. Made me feel a million times better. He hated seeing how that job would just drain me, so he's actually ridiculously excited about this haha! Now I can take my time finding something really awesome to do or even do part-time work in a totally different field to build up my resume while taking care of baby.

And our changing table arrived, so now I've got something to keep me busy tomorrow!!

Mamamonzo · January 2014

Bluebird2318 said:
@Mamamonzo Oh no! Have you already painted? I think I would admit to it and take my "I told you so" lumps if there was the chance to change it up.

Walls are painted. I kept saying it will get better..... Wahhhhhh. Honestly I'm more upset about the stinky cat fart than The paint at the moment!

pannk · January 2014

@mamamonzo cat farts are the WORST.

irisheyez7 · January 2014

I think I am getting the sciatic pain in my lower back some of you other ladies have been talking about. I couldn't get comfortable to sleep for the life of me last night. It's like a weird, sharp pain low in my back by my tailbone and it shoots downwards. Boo.

On a bright note my uber procrastinator sister finally booked my shower venue and we have a date! February 23rd it is!

And big hugs Stace, it know how hard it is to lose your job when you are pregnant! Be happy you have as much saved as you do and don't stress and enjoy your time off! Something better will come along so screw them!

And Aviola: T&P and keep us updated!

pineconey · January 2014

loooooooooooong week!!!! my goodness! i went from having very few evening commitments to being busy every night this week except 1. and i have to be somewhere in 45 minutes tonight too. agh! i need a 20 hour nap.

i started tracking my protein today more "officially" because it's been pushed so much by both my MW and my Bradley Method instructor, so i dusted off my myfitnesspal account. i told myself to not worry about calories, but really to focus on the protein and other nutrients i'm taking in. it is HARD AS HELL to hit 100 grams of protein in a day! sheesh!! though, i will say, part of that was i got bagels for a staff meeting today and got to keep the extras... meaning i've had 3 bagels today. bagels are NOT high on the protein list.

it will be interesting to see if i'm really doing as well as i thought i was before tracking or if i've been off pace for awhile. i'm committing to working hard at staying on top of the things i CAN do to stay low risk (there's a list on the bradley book including eating the right balance of foods and exercise- common sense stuff mostly) because my biggest fears are pre-e and GD, though i have no reason right now to think i have either. ok, i'm a fatty, so i've been told i'm screwed and getting GD, but whatever. my GTT is next week, so we'll see...

HUGS to all of you who had a rough day! hope it's a fantastic evening and that you get to rest and do things you love!

Bluebird2318 · January 2014

@stace0616 Discretionary spending is such a godsend for the budget! For awhile DH and I were worried that we would struggle to get by on his current salary (he has been on the promotion hunt for awhile), but better spending habits have really turned that around. A big part of it (hundreds of dollars a month) was just cutting back on restaurants and eating out! We honestly don't notice a change as far as quality of life but we definitely notice a change in our bank statements! His possible promotion has gone from an absolute necessity to a really awesome bonus just from discretionary spending!

pineconey · January 2014

@stace0616 Discretionary spending is such a godsend for the budget! For awhile DH and I were worried that we would struggle to get by on his current salary (he has been on the promotion hunt for awhile), but better spending habits have really turned that around. A big part of it (hundreds of dollars a month) was just cutting back on restaurants and eating out! We honestly don't notice a change as far as quality of life but we definitely notice a change in our bank statements! His possible promotion has gone from an absolute necessity to a really awesome bonus just from discretionary spending!

THIS!!!!!!! We noticed a huge change too when we reigned in our social spending.

fireflygirl12 · January 2014

@mamamonzo - I would change it if I were you. Pregnant women are allowed to be indecisive

thomas930 · January 2014

Hugs ladies, lots of hugs to you all. So sorry for all of you that have had a crappy day.

deidremaria · January 2014

So this is officially dubbed A14's crappy Friday. I'm hoping this means tomorrow will be a better day for all of us and that next Friday will be the complete opposite and we'll all be sharing amazing Fridays.

Also T&Ps to you Aviola

Miss504NOLA · January 2014

Hopefully things work out for both of you @Stace0616 and @aviola329!

Mamamonzo · January 2014

AprilMay9 said:

Mamamonzo said:

Bluebird2318 said:
@Mamamonzo Oh no! Have you already painted? I think I would admit to it and take my "I told you so" lumps if there was the chance to change it up.
Walls are painted. I kept saying it will get better..... Wahhhhhh. Honestly I'm more upset about the stinky cat fart than The paint at the moment!
Pic? What color is it?

I'll post when in done. I'm prying one more coat will have it looking a little better. It's a super super light gray. The previous owners had like a very light tan bead board and it looked dirty. I didn't want stark white against our other shocking colors of Navy and Lime Green ( Seattle Seahawks colors) but now the gray looks like a light purple!

Tferr02 · January 2014

Upset with my dh right now even though I know I'm blowing it way out of proportion. I asked him to bring me a chocolate milkshake on his way home from work tonight...he got home 3 hours late (I hate his job) and no milkshake...I waited 2 hours to make dinner and finally gave up and made it and ate it..to find out he ate at work.

Medic99 · January 2014

I seriously cannot catch a break

. I just finished up an antibiotic for an infection and today found out it gave me a yeast infection. So not happy.

Mamamonzo · January 2014

dani+california said:
Uh, full moon today or what? A14 seems to be having a shite day. Thoughts and hugs to all the ladies who had a rough time today.

I vote that 4 months from now, when all of our little ones are tucked safely in bed we have a collective round of drinks at the same time to toast the good times and the bad. All of today's problems will seem so far away then ladies. Hang in there.

Also I have a legitimate 'Das Boot' like in Beerfest that I would love to cheers you ladies to soooo this is happening.

Eff that, let's all have a glass of wine right now!!!

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