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Would like to meet similar TTCers :)
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Re: Would like to meet similar TTCers :)
My husbands understands no means no, so no, not every guy is like that. I couldn't be married to a man who can't respect me enough to listen when I don't want sex.
n Chart</a>"http://www.fertilityfriend.com" style="font-size:smaller;" >Ovulation Charww.fertilityfriend.com" style="font-size:smaller;" >Ovulation Chart</a>
Mrs. H
Crohn's Dx: August 2008
Endometriosis Dx: May 2010
Married: 05/19/2012
TTC #1: June 2013
BFP: December 2013
DS: Born 08/29/2014
TTC #2: July 2015
BFP #2: September 25, 2015
Thanks so much! Is fertility friend an app?? Is it free?
It is an app and I believe it's free, but I liked upgrading to the VIP version. I got a deal through Facebook by liking them. You'll also need a basal body thermometer which you can get for around $8 at Target or Walmart. Fertility a Friend is great and will help you track your cycles and also log other symptoms so you can recognize patterns in your cycles
My husband and I don't have sex everyday, but I've never said no to him, even when I didn't feel like it, he doesn't know because I'm always willing for his sake. Partly because in the Bible it says not to refuse your spouse unless you both agree to hold off, and partly because I want his needs to be met. Even if I'm not into it at the moment, it's still an act of love to me
But I did want to say good luck to you!
The bible also says to stone adulterers to death, hopefully you don't follow EVERYTHING it says
Married August 2012. Me: 41 DH: 42
Daughter from previous marriage: 20
BFP 12/19/12: Ectopic discovered at 8 weeks, right tube removed 01/18/13
June 2013 Testing Results: Progesterone: 31.7, LH: 5, FSH: 5, Estradiol: 161
Clomid cycles Nov. 2013 and Jan, Feb, and March 2014
TTC journey over as of the end of October 2014
TTCAL BLOG
All ALers welcome!
Honestly it doesn't bother me, if he knew I didn't want to he'd be fine with that but I like taking care of him. And he doesn't bug me for it all the time so he's not unreasonable
Maybe my husband's weird, but he doesn't really enjoy sex with me if I'm doing it out of "guilt".
bad if I didn't want to have sex he told me that was my job and loved to throw that part of the bible at me that a spouse was suppose to obey their husband. I lived like that for 12 years and never knew that's not how it was suppose to be until I went to counciling because I was severely depressed.
Please keep encouraging your husband to get help it's very important! My ex husband refused any help so I divorced him. I've remarried and never knew life could be this good. Good luck with everything.
Read it yourself, it's called 'Casting off' your wife. Not divorce, not seperation, but shoving her into the street and letting her potentially die. Not morally acceptable anymore. Neither is 'an eye for an eye'. There's a ton of other stuff like that.
My family raised me very strictly religiously, and even they never told me to bend over on command because of the bible.
I read the Bible daily. I would like to see you quote the part you think says women cannot own property because I have never come across it in all my studies. Women did not own property in any culture in that era.
I'd also like to point out that the punishment for sin was very harsh in the Old Testament. It included a lot of terrible punishments that we would be shocked at today. The amazing thing is that Jesus came and paid that terrible price in our place. He was sinless and undeserving of such a punishment... He was God, and he lived a human life and died a human death so that we could be free from the consequences of our sins. Now we do not fear death for our transgressions, but out of love for our savior we choose to pattern our lives after him, doing good and showing love to everyone no matter who they are or what they have done. Remember in the New Testament a woman was thrown out in the street for being a prostitute and was about to be stoned, but Jesus stepped in and told those who wanted to kill her that whoever was without sin could punish her. Then, he being worthy of punishing her, turned to her and told her that her sins were forgiven and she was allowed to live. That's who Jesus was and that is who Christians are supposed to pattern their lives after. So yes, I try to do EVERYTHING the Bible says because He is worthy and just and deserving of our obedience. Luckily Jesus came and gave us the choice to follow him and be forgiven or to reject him and his sacrifice.
Back to being submissive to our husbands... you women have it all wrong. Husbands have obligations to us, too! Check out Ephesians 5. I don't buy in to always giving myself to him even when I'm hurting. If it wasn't everyday or even multiple times per day that he asked for it, maybe.... I think the bible was talking about a long-term refusal to have sex. If the husband is puting his wife through something that is harmful to her then he is the one in the wrong, not the wife. That said, my husband has his flaws like everyone does. I don't think it is right for all of you to respond to us by saying our husbands are jerks. That does not make them jerks. Truth be told it is the least of my worries... I'm not suffering, and he provides for me and takes care of me so I'm not going to complain until it is about something just completely unreasonable.
If you had posted "WOO, I love sex so much I bone every day!" then, awesome. Good for you! But you seem to only be having sex so frequently because that's what your husband wants and you want to satisfy him, not because YOU want to and enjoy it so frequently.
Oh yeah, QFP for sures.
For the bolded, I'm actually Agnostic but that's one of my favorite bible stories. That's the one with the line "He that is without sin among you, let him first cast a stone at her" comes from, and when all of her accusers walk away Jesus looks over at her and says "Woman, where are those thine accusers? hath no man condemned thee? She said, "No man, Lord." And Jesus said unto her, "Neither do I condemn thee: go, and sin no more."
If more christians were like that, I might never have given up on the whole religion thang...
Back to more important things. My DH was like that back when we first started dating, we were 18 though. At the time I was all like "er my gawd, this loveeeee *swoon*". After about a year of that, I moved onto "get off me bitch, I'm trying to sleep". He got the picture.
Edit: Welcome and good luck
TTC #1 October 2012
Me (30): PCOS DH (31): SA looks good
12/13: Clomid + IUI = BFN
1/14: Clomid + Trigger + TI = BFN
2/14: Benched = BCP
3/14: Femara = BFN
4/14: Break for job change = BFP!! EDD 1/5/15
My husband is not shitty. What is wrong with you?
I read the Bible daily. I would like to see you quote the part you think says women cannot own property because I have never come across it in all my studies. Women did not own property in any culture in that era.
I'd also like to point out that the punishment for sin was very harsh in the Old Testament. It included a lot of terrible punishments that we would be shocked at today. The amazing thing is that Jesus came and paid that terrible price in our place. He was sinless and undeserving of such a punishment... He was God, and he lived a human life and died a human death so that we could be free from the consequences of our sins. Now we do not fear death for our transgressions, but out of love for our savior we choose to pattern our lives after him, doing good and showing love to everyone no matter who they are or what they have done. Remember in the New Testament a woman was thrown out in the street for being a prostitute and was about to be stoned, but Jesus stepped in and told those who wanted to kill her that whoever was without sin could punish her. Then, he being worthy of punishing her, turned to her and told her that her sins were forgiven and she was allowed to live. That's who Jesus was and that is who Christians are supposed to pattern their lives after. So yes, I try to do EVERYTHING the Bible says because He is worthy and just and deserving of our obedience. Luckily Jesus came and gave us the choice to follow him and be forgiven or to reject him and his sacrifice.
Back to being submissive to our husbands... you women have it all wrong. Husbands have obligations to us, too! Check out Ephesians 5. I don't buy in to always giving myself to him even when I'm hurting. If it wasn't everyday or even multiple times per day that he asked for it, maybe.... I think the bible was talking about a long-term refusal to have sex. If the husband is puting his wife through something that is harmful to her then he is the one in the wrong, not the wife. That said, my husband has his flaws like everyone does. I don't think it is right for all of you to respond to us by saying our husbands are jerks. That does not make them jerks. Truth be told it is the least of my worries... I'm not suffering, and he provides for me and takes care of me so I'm not going to complain until it is about something just completely unreasonable.
You're having a completely different convo than the rest of us, and ignoring what people are actually saying so you can be offended.
A.) Where did I call your H an asshole?
B.) You skipped over half of what I said to try to prove me wrong, whivh meant you are now having an unrelated convo with yourself
C) You are assuming I am anti christian because I don't believe in 100% obeying every word of the bible. You are extremely incorrect.
Also, I was taught (not by the bible though) that sex should never be used as a weapon. I just find it gross that your husband makes you feel guilty for turning him down so rather than feel his guilt trip, you just give in and let him have sex with you whenever he wants.
A.) Where did I call your H an asshole?
B.) You skipped over half of what I said to try to prove me wrong, whivh meant you are now having an unrelated convo with yourself
C) You are assuming I am anti christian because I don't believe in 100% obeying every word of the bible.
You are extremely incorrect.
I'm sorry, girl, I quoted you but I
was responding to a lot of people who had posted related things and didn't make that clear.
I can only imagine you haven't worked out the whole female orgasm thing if sex like doing laundry.
I was just saying that on the days that I don't feel like doing it, it makes me less miserable than laundry does which isn't very much at all. Point being, there isn't much to be concerned about here. I'm obviously not being abused.
If you honestly can't see what's wrong with the above bolded, then I think we're wasting our time with this conversation.
n Chart</a>"http://www.fertilityfriend.com" style="font-size:smaller;" >Ovulation Charww.fertilityfriend.com" style="font-size:smaller;" >Ovulation Chart</a>
It's one thing to be submissive because it sexually and emotionally satisfies you, it's another entirely what is being described here.
If you honestly can't see what's wrong with the above bolded, then I think we're wasting our time with this conversation.
Actually you are, because there is no problem for y'all to find. The laundry comment was just to show you what a small thing it is to have sex when I don't want to. I think I'm the one wasting my time... you guys are way to caught up in my own personal life which, though not perfect, is really very much a fulfilling one.
Sometimes it's easier to delude yourself than admit there is a problem. I would be concerned about the long term impact this arrangement might have on your self esteem.