Worst mommy moment.

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

pobrecita said:

Yeah but she KNEW it was wrong. She is admitting that. Why are we fighting over that? I'm confused.

I'm bored.

gollywollypog · October 2013

Boy that escalated quickly gif

My older two were in FF seats at 1. I got seats from Sams that only FF. They specified one year and 20lbs as the minimum. They probably cost $60. I had NO IDEA at that time that RF was safer. I was poor, young and internet free, let alone TB.

There is a girl on A12 who lives somewhere in or near Newfoundland . She said there babies are FF at 6 months and she had to search high and low to find a seat that would ERFand had she not been on TB she would have just FF at 6 mo like everyone else.

I'm just saying that sometimes you don't have the knowledge, and sometimes you do but, like @fredalina said, there is just a limited number of options available. I'd bet the seat the grandparents or whoever had was one of the kinds I had for my older two.

Also, I don't get the mud vibe from this post. At all.

I'm smh.

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

pobrecita said:

LoisLayn23 said:

The issue is that she's claiming ignorance while also stating she knew it was wrong. So which is it?

She is?

She claimed she knew it was wrong, but not why it was wrong.

Her OP is pretty ambiguous, tho, and her follow ups weren't much more detailed about what actually went down.

[Deleted User] · October 2013

She deserved to be flamed. Period, point blank. She knew it was wrong but did it anyway. 6 months later she came on tb and posted about it and is surprised to be flamed.

I'm laffin at that last part.

LoveActually4 · October 2013

@gollywollypog "over here near Newfoundland" we have the same laws and the same car seats. I'm not sure if that girl was dense or if youre just mixing up your facts but it's not a regional thing and "everyone else" does not FF at 6 months.

We're Canadian, not stupid.

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

LoveActually4 said:

@gollywollypog "over here near Newfoundland" we have the same laws and the same car seats. I'm not sure if that girl was dense or if youre just mixing up your facts but it's not a regional thing and "everyone else" does not FF at 6 months. We're Canadian, not stupid.

This made me laugh probably harder than it should have.

gollywollypog · October 2013

Yeah, no. I'm wondering why you didn't bring your car seat with you on the plane. And I'm wondering why you couldn't turn the seat before strapping your kid. Strap on your flame suit, I think you should read a beginners parenting book to learn a couple things like car seat safety'n'stuff.

/quote Can't get out of the box, sorry.
This comment really rubs me the wrong way. Did she know she could gate check? Who knows? I didn't the first time I flew with my lap infant. I've flown exactly twice, ever.

theseaword · October 2013

LoisLayn23 said:
The issue is that she's claiming ignorance while also stating she knew it was wrong. So which is it?

It's what Fredalina said on the previous page. She knew it was wrong ( but maybe not how wrong) but was stuck in an unfortunate situation being at the airport with few options.

Maebb · October 2013

***Just went off to Google why to give whole milk over 2% milk. DS has always been 95th percentile for height and weight, so I didn't know if he "needed" the extra fat. FTR, I did mix about 2 oz of 2% milk with his formula a month ago when we were on vacation because it was our last day, and I was afraid of running out of formula powder if he pitched a fit on the airplane.***

Not everyone needs to know "why" about things. DH wants to know because he's just a learner type and wants to know all the info. I don't always care about knowing why, as long as I know what's safe and what's not. I don't think not knowing why makes someone a bad mom. But I gave my baby formula and 2 oz of 2% milk before his first birthday, so clearly I'm no parenting role model.

gollywollypog · October 2013

LoveActually4 said:

@gollywollypog "over here near Newfoundland" we have the same laws and the same car seats. I'm not sure if that girl was dense or if youre just mixing up your facts but it's not a regional thing and "everyone else" does not FF at 6 months. We're Canadian, not stupid.

I'm sorry, I might be mistaken on where she lives. I'm trying to figure it out, but regardless, I'm just repeating what she's said several times on our bmb.

scoutkate · October 2013

LaylaPartDeux said:

Does anyone else see ScoutKate's avatar as CG's???

Say what now?

Maebb · October 2013

@HilarityEnsued, please explain the benefits that come out of flaming in this case.

If someone did something awful and doesn't realize it was bad or doesn't feel guilty, I think a flaming could be "called for" if it helps to protect their children's safety (or helps them to be nicer to people, or whatever) in the future. But in this case, OP knows she made a huge mistake and wouldn't do it again, so I don't know why the flaming is necessary or productive.

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

Giving a kid milk =/= car seat safety.

Maebb · October 2013

I know giving milk = / = car seat safety, but @HilarityEnsued brought it up as an example of "needing to know why," and I realized that I didn't know why.

amycorn · October 2013

I think turning my DD FF on her first birthday is my biggest regret. Luckily she took well to being turned RF once again and I'll keep her there till she grows out of her seat.

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

It wasn't directed at you @hilarityensued

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

This thread would've gone entirely different if the OP hadn't thrown down with "You're an idiot" to one of the mildest "flamings" (really an admonition) on the first page.

She brought all of this on herself with that.

A simple "Yeah, I was a dumbshit" would've turned this thread into one of discussing all our worst parenting moments.

LoveActually4 · October 2013

I think there's a huge difference between unknowingly making a mistake and knowing your child is incorrectly and unsafely fastened and just hoping for the best.

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

Wow. You guys suck at parenting if you don't research.

that was a joke, btw.

amycorn · October 2013

CinemaGoddess said:
Wait.

Which carseats exactly that would fit a 6 month old cannot be RF?

I actually have a FF HBB that my son would technically fit in. He's not yet 6 months. He's a big boy.
However that's not to say he *will* be in it any time soon.
It's an Eddie Bauer I think?

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

HilarityEnsued said:

CinemaGoddess said:

Wow. You guys suck at parenting if you don't research.

FTR, I wasn't implying this (or wasn't trying to). If you are following safety guidelines and doctor recommendations and don't want to research, then don't do it. I don't think it means you suck at parenting. And I recognize my need to ask "why" to all things ever isn't the healthy construct either.

Did you read my entire post, @hilarityensued?

specifically scrolling to the bottom.

amycorn · October 2013

@thekatie wasn't there a "debate" recently about there being no actual law about FF, but rather a "proper usage" law instead that wasn't really upheld. Which ended with many many many people FF before a year?

thekatie · October 2013

@amycorn Yeah.

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

amycorn said:

@thekatie wasn't there a "debate" recently about there being no actual law about FF, but rather a "proper usage" law instead that wasn't really upheld. Which ended with many many many people FF before a year?

That would depend on your state. WA has a state law about it. Oregon doesn't. So if you travel from Oregon to Washington and your 9mo old is FF, you can get pulled over.

amycorn · October 2013

CinemaGoddess said:

amycorn said:

@thekatie wasn't there a "debate" recently about there being no actual law about FF, but rather a "proper usage" law instead that wasn't really upheld. Which ended with many many many people FF before a year?

That would depend on your state. WA has a state law about it. Oregon doesn't. So if you travel from Oregon to Washington and your 9mo old is FF, you can get pulled over.

I'm in Canada. So far as I know we all have the 1yr & 22lb law up here.

thekatie · October 2013

@amycorn Yeah.

The law in some states is 1 year AND 20 pounds. In some it's 1 year OR 20 pounds. Some don't have a specific rear facing law.

It's still best practice, regardless of law, to rear face as long as possible.

amycorn · October 2013

thekatie said:
@amycorn Yeah.

The law in some states is 1 year AND 20 pounds. In some it's 1 year OR 20 pounds. Some don't have a specific rear facing law.

It's still best practice, regardless of law, to rear face as long as possible.

I wish I could knock sense into my sils who think I'm nuts for having bug rf still at 3...

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

Huh. That must've changed in the last few years because when the girls were RF the law was different.

amycorn · October 2013

pobrecita said:
Oregon: Child seat required to 40 lbs. or max upper weight limit of seat;
rear-facing to 1 yr & 20 lbs; booster seat for children over 40 lbs
but < age 8 or < 4'9" tall

Fine: $110

Backless booster?

amycorn · October 2013

@loislayn23 I would assume so yeah.

thekatie · October 2013

pobrecita said:

thekatie said:

@amycorn Yeah.

The law in some states is 1 year AND 20 pounds. In some it's 1 year OR 20 pounds. Some don't have a specific rear facing law.

It's still best practice, regardless of law, to rear face as long as possible.

No. It's one year OR 20 lbs because some one year olds aren't 20 lbs.

What? It's "and" or it's "or" depending on state. Not every state has the same law.

LoveActually4 · October 2013

In Canada they're trying the have the laws changed (I think this is similar to the US) and all major Canadian medical associations recommended RFing to 2 yrs and beyond.

amycorn · October 2013

LoveActually4 said:
In Canada they're trying the have the laws changed (I think this is similar to the US) and all major Canadian medical associations recommended RFing to 2 yrs and beyond.

I didn't know this, and it makes me very happy.

amycorn · October 2013

Out of curiosity, what do y'all consider ERF? Like what age would you flip?

LoveActually4 · October 2013

HilarityEnsued said:
I'm fully dreading the discussion I'm going to have to get in with my family about why I'm not going to turn DS FF on his second birthday. My mom comments on the fact that he's RF constantly.

Grrr.

OMG my parents just don't get it. No amount of links or YouTube videos will make them believe me.

amycorn · October 2013

LoveActually4 said:

HilarityEnsued said:
I'm fully dreading the discussion I'm going to have to get in with my family about why I'm not going to turn DS FF on his second birthday. My mom comments on the fact that he's RF constantly.

Grrr.
OMG my parents just don't get it. No amount of links or YouTube videos will make them believe me.

Have you shown them the one where it shows a crash test ff and one rf? I think it's called "the importance of rear facing"
I cried.

CinemaGoddess · October 2013

amycorn said:

Out of curiosity, what do y'all consider ERF? Like what age would you flip?

I consider it anything beyond the 1 year and 20lbs.

We flipped when the girls were a little over 2.

LoveActually4 · October 2013

amycorn said:

LoveActually4 said:

HilarityEnsued said:
I'm fully dreading the discussion I'm going to have to get in with my family about why I'm not going to turn DS FF on his second birthday. My mom comments on the fact that he's RF constantly.

Grrr.
OMG my parents just don't get it. No amount of links or YouTube videos will make them believe me.
Have you shown them the one where it shows a crash test ff and one rf? I think it's called "the importance of rear facing"
I cried.

I've given up. I just tell them to shhh and keep their seat RF. Between that and no snowsuits in the car seat they think I'm crazy.

thekatie · October 2013

pobrecita said:
The legal minimum in all 50 states is 1 year AND 20 pounds.

It says or because you might have a kid who is one but only 15 lbs. It is confusing.

There is no US federal law making a 50-state-wide legal minimum. Every state has its own laws. Most states (I still don't know if every state does or not) do at least have the proper use clause (and this is the debate amycorn mentioned - people were saying proper use wouldn't hold up in court), but not every state requires 1 and 20.

When a law says 1 or 20, that's what it means. If your child is 1 you can turn them even if they are 15lb. If your child is 20lb you can turn them even if they are 9 months. The "or" makes it whichever comes first.

If a law says 1 and 20, you must wait until both happen. If LO turns 1 but weights 15 pounds you must wait and remain rear facing, and if LO turns 20 pounds at 9 months you still must wait until a year to turn.

It is confusing, and it should be national - with higher requirements, too. I used to think "but it's so obviously safer everyone will do it - we don't need a LAW to make people ERF" and since I've learned that's not true I do wish the laws were stricter. But they aren't.

RondackHiker · October 2013

pobrecita said:
I consider ERF to be after 2 years, since that's the AAP's recommendation.

This. We're still going strong. I'll eventually turn him but I don't have any issues bending to buckle him yet.

Though two days ago I put him in, walked around and started the car and DS said, "mommy? Are you going to buckle me?"

I somehow forgot. I am still horrified.

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