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May 2011 Moms
CarrieLeigh84
member
know whats rad? Turning your back on miscarriage
CarrieLeigh84
member
Seriously. Miscarriage is NOT fvcking contagious.
I understand the need to stay positive about your own pregnancy, but how about supporting those who need support right now?
This makes me so angry. I've had a stillbirth and an early miscarriage and I would have been devastated if I'd been treated like this. Thankfully, not everyone is dense enough to think that all this "doom and gloom" will cause a miscarriage of their own.
To all those who have experienced loss today, this week, hell, even in the past... I'm sorry. I know your pain, and I am sending a lot of love your way.
Stillbirth at 23w6d on Sept, 22, 2008
M/C at 5 weeks June 14, 2010
My miracle, James Frederick born May 2, 2011 via C-section
This discussion has been closed.
Re: know whats rad? Turning your back on miscarriage
Exactly. I'm referring to the "I can't handle such negativity. I'm leaving this board for awhile" bullsh!t below.
Must breathe. Blood is boiling.
I am not sure what happened, but my heart goes out to all the women who got bad news. I wouldn't wish it on anyone the pain I went though with my m/c, but I don't think until you have been there you can fully understand.
But I agree 100% with you.
I lost my angels 07/2010, 04/2017, 10/2017
Meimsx no more
Oh, I'm sorry. I didn't read that. That's really awful.
Ohhh. I just read that post. F*ck that. Didn't we have one of these posts a few weeks ago too? I told that poster it was out of line.
If someone needs to take a break, just do it. Don't announce it to everyone so other people can feel like crap when they're already going through something really hard.
I totally agree. Frankly, the women having complications need support more than any of the rest of us right now.
And -- just because I'm feeling fiesty... if you're going to take a break just do it. No need to draw attention to yourself.
To be clear - I'm not saying that people were directly rude to those saying goodbye.
But trust me. After a loss, you will come back and read this board. It makes you feel like sh!t to realize that people are "stepping away" because of your bad news.
Once again... If your referring to the post I wrote then obviously some things need to be clarified.. For one, I have given my support to the ladies going through this rough time, and for two, I was NOT trying to start world war III, but posting my opinion. Maybe I should have kept this to myself? Hopefully, the ladies that are going through rough times are able to see past this... How dare someone say that I'm not extending support, when I'm in tears reading about their losses... SMH
The timing on your post was way off and makes you look insensitive.
oh you can share your own opinion but you also should think of how you come across. but you can leave now and that would be grand. or you can keep telling us you are leaving, either or.
You were being an attention wh0re, plain and simple.
With your 42 posts, do you really think anyone was going to miss you that much? The answer, darling, is NO.
I suggest that you grow up, and realize that when people are hurting, the appropriate response is NOT to turn your back on them, but to offer sympathy, and condolences.
Miscarriage is NOT leprosy. You can't farking well catch it from being with in a 10 mile radius.
Go and be positive and fart out your glitter covered puppies and rainbows. I'm staying here to be supportive to people who need it.
Toodles.
I'm sorry, I responded before seeing that post. I agree that it was an incredibly insensitive thing to post.
My Acme Box last update 3/28/11
Yes, this is the kind of thing you keep to yourself. I had a m/c in July and if someone had posted this right after I posted about my m/c, it would have made me feel even worse than I already did. Right now you are kind of making their losses about you. And it's not about you.
Please hon, do yourself a favor and if you say you are going to leave, leave. This whole coming back and commenting thing just makes you look like a douche. Yes you made a mistake, just next time think before you type ok?
Yes -- maybe you should have. Your words and sentiments are hurtful.
Yes. That would have been highly appropriate.
My Acme Box last update 3/28/11
Wow! For people to start bullsh*&$ posts like this is ridiculous. If I came off as insensitive then I am sorry for that... And if people are going to defame me, I have a right to clarify things (that's why I'm not gone!) I wasn't aware of the RULES, and as stated above I have extended my support to the ladies going through loss. I can't believe how harsh people are being and thought this was a place where I would enjoy for the next 9 months, but obviously I was wrong!!
I am sure that NOT everyone would agree that I was intentionally trying to hurt others, but seems as if no one can admit this. I am in shock right now!
With all the negative language and bad-mouthing being tossed around, you have the nerve to tell me I'm insensitive and should show respect. Again women who are going through, or have suffered losses, know that I did not mean anything negative by posting that I was taking a break.
Thanks to the few, who actually understood. I appreciated the few ladies that have made me feel welcome. Fighting on an online board is a bit much.
Someone posted one of those "I have to leave the bump because the m/c posts make me feel awful" posts right after I had my m/c in June (and yes, I was still checking the board then) and it made me feel terrible. What a tactless thing to do.
Seriously, if anyone else feels the need to take a break, just do it. No one needs to know and chances are, no one will notice. Just slip away and do your thing. Announcing it like that is so insensitive after someone has just shared the most devastating kind of loss.
m/c 6/10
yet you continue to speak.
ARE YOU FVCKING STUPID?????????????
What you said was INAPPROPRIATE, INSENSITIVE and just plain Douchey.
Stop making other people's pain about yourself. You're coming across as self absorbed, ignorant and now, just plain dumb.
Leave.
Leave now.
Go before you open your dipsh!t mouth and say something even more selfish than you already have.
There is no amount of self defense that can clear up your selfish antics.
Just because you didn't mean to be insensitive doesn't mean you weren't. I've learned that through the bump. You should take this and grow. And posting this comment and coming across as rude and defensive instead of contrite and apologetic just makes it worse. You should just say you are sorry and not assume that those of us who have suffered a loss "knew you didn't mean anything negative." Like Iris said, if I saw something like this when I was having my m/c I would have felt like crap even more. Just man up and take responsibility for your actions.
I lost my angels 07/2010, 04/2017, 10/2017
Meimsx no more
I actually give you the benefit of the doubt -- I am quite certain that your words were not said INTENDING to hurt others. But they did. We all have made mistakes and have accidentally hurt someone or a group of people. The appropriate response at this point is an "im sorry".
If you wish to stay -- stay. If you wish to go -- be well.
That goes for all of you.
I don't think you're making anyone feel better with this response (except maybe yourself?). An apology would have been more appropriate.
Please don't assume how your post would make those who have suffered a loss feel, because clearly you're wrong. I'm sure you didn't think you were being insensitive when you wrote what you did, but unfortunately it was.
OK well I see at least 4 posters in this thread who have had a loss, so you don't speak for all of us. A number of us found your post in poor taste, so maybe instead of playing the internet martyr card, you should stop to think about what we are saying. I would rather see your feelings hurt on this topic than those of someone who is losing their baby.
The bump--almost as good for personal growth as meditation
Seriously, if you can't understand what we are trying to say, the bump may not be the best place for you. You are making this all about you. And you have no way of knowing how your post will effect the women who are going through this terrible thing, or who have gone through it. Apparently there are some of us who took it offensively. There are just somethings, as my mom use to say, that you need to think before you speak, or in this case write.
And an apology was all the was needed. Lose the being a victim card, its not working for you. You may find you fit in somewhere else better then you do here, because at this point I think you just need to leave.
Ok... I was not planning on getting involved in this conversation... but you're just AWing at this point. If you're going to leave, leave. You posted you were leaving and obviously came back to check and see how many people/who was going to tell you not to go and send their T&P, etc.
Really?
Take a break, you need to and we get that, but just go ahead and do it.
And Carrie is just posting her opinion, snookums.
Sometimes you just need to get your azz kicked to learn an important lesson.
I lost my angels 07/2010, 04/2017, 10/2017
Meimsx no more