IF Testing & Treatment w/o 5.17

acleverusername

This is a place for those of us who have already started TTC, but have started infertility testing and/or treatments. You can express your thoughts, feelings, and frustrations on infertility. TTC can be a long journey naturally, then add in the difficulties associated with infertility, and it becomes a whole new ball game. The road to infertility can be lonely, frustrating, and complicated, so let's make this a place where we can vent, ask questions, and support one another. Feel free to resurrect this thread at any point in the week if you have something to say. Treat this as an ongoing conversation.

Diagnosis (if you've been):  

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  

How are things going?:  

Any questions?:  

GTKY:  Are you a Savory or Sweet kind of person? Share your favorite meal in the category. 

kiki047

Diagnosis (if you've been):  PCOS, RPL, MFI

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  4dp5dt 

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  Counting down the days until my beta next Tuesday. Follow up re: PGT is June 2nd. I am a reformed serial tester so I will not likely POAS until the weekend unless I'm somehow swayed to do so (by MH). 

How are things going?:  *TW RPL* Good, I think. Fighting that internal dialogue with my own conscience about the guilt that comes along with RPL. This is our 4th transfer (and 1st fresh) so I carry a lot of baggage about things I would have done differently, and just a general feeling like I'm somehow "causing" my losses. I know it's irrational but as a control freak, I am fully incapable of letting it go because then it feels like it was "fate" that caused all my losses, and that just plain stinks. 

Any questions?: Any thoughts on what to do with my leftover meds? My clinic has said in the past that they won't issue refunds but that they'd take it as a donation. Part of me doesn't trust them to actually pass it on so I'd kinda rather donate it to a couple in need myself. I think I'll reach out to some Canadian influencers who might have a better idea of needs. 

GTKY:  Are you a Savory or Sweet kind of person? Share your favorite meal in the category. Savoury, but I love to bake cakes for other people lol. My favourite thing to make these days is sous vide NY strip, and the sides vary. MH's favourite is the oven roasted balsamic mushroom caps that I've made a few times, but we also love it with salads, roasted veggies, etc. I've eaten at amazing restaurants all around the world but some of the most consistently amazing meals I've ever had was on a Royal Caribbean cruise. 

acleverusername

@kiki047 R e d d i t's IF community accepts donation posts and I know there are a bunch of Canadians in it. Another option is finding a local Single Mom by Choice Group on Facebook. Med Donation search url in spoiler:  

https://www.reddit.com/r/infertility/search/?q=med donation&source=recent&restrict_sr=1

[Deleted User]

@kiki047 ((((hugs))))  Oh, my heart just breaks to hear you talk like that.  I know though that pretty much no amount of rationalizing or logic can make your heart not feel how it does, and still it makes me so sad to hear you going down that path of wanting to blame yourself for your losses.

*TW*
<div class=" Spoiler">I have never had an unsuccessful pregnancy get that far along, so I can only imagine how hard that must be to think things are all going along fine and be blindsided like that.  More than once.  But I do identify with the loss feelings, and I know it's impossible not to wonder at least a little bit.  "Was there something I could have done differently," and I am here to tell you that there was nothing you could have done.  As senseless as it seems, sometimes people just get sh** luck, or get dealt a sh**y hand, and there's nothing you did to cause or deserve it, it all comes down to how you play the cards you're dealt.  That's the only piece we get a say in, and at the end of the day, I do hope that you know and truly believe you are doing the best you can.  We are all just doing the best we can. <3</div><p>
</p>

bumblebee0210

@kiki047. The losses were not your fault. There is *nothing* you could have done differently-- it probably is a combination of bad luck and some underlying tendency that you may never understand. But please, please please don't blame yourself. I know the instinct-- and in some ways that's why I hate the "do everything" mindset because I feel like the flipside is that it's somehow under your control, and by extension, your fault if it doesn't work. It has taken me a long time to let go and realize that in fact there is very little I can do beyond finding a doctor I trust and following her plan. I'm so sorry you're feeling this way-- PGAL brain is so much. I'm hoping so hard that this is the one for you and you also get good news on the other guys!

Diagnosis (if you've been):  RPL, DOR

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  WTO (Trigger tonight--ER Wednesday)

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  ER cycle #3

How are things going?:  Eh. If all goes well we can maybe get 5 good eggs out on Wednesday. Part of me is bummed we are starting at such a low number, but I also know if we can get high fert rates we can end up in he same or even a better place than the last two cycles. Sometimes when I am dealing with the roller coaster, I try to remember the story of the zen farmer. If you don't know it, I'll link to a version in the spoiler 

https://blog.mindfulness.com/meditation/are-these-bad-times-or-good-times-the-story-of-the-zen-farmer

Any questions?: Um, when can I stop doing these?

GTKY:  Are you a Savory or Sweet kind of person? Share your favorite meal in the category. I am a sweet tooth but not too sweet-- I love a dense dark chocolate tart, or the pistachio croissant at Sofra bakery in Cambridge. 

optimistgardener

@kiki047 the others have already said it better than I can, but please know that there is nothing you could have done and it isn't your fault. I'm sending a hug your way and aaaaall the good vibes for this transfer.

I'm gonna do the weekly thing here this time around even though I got nothin'

Diagnosis (if you've been):  sad ol' ovary, DOR

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  I can't help myself so even though I've been dealing with a cyst this month when I realized I was (maybe?) going to ovulate I talked my long-suffering friend/donor into helping me out again. Ovulation pain and thermal shift were both present, so I'm kinda sorta TWW but considering everything my chances are pretty slim, so still more like benched.

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  waiting for another cycle on BCs next month before trying again in July

How are things going?:  Uh, fine I guess? The job thing I was all jittery about a couple of weeks ago looks like it's going to happen. I did a bunch of calendar-gazing and realized that, barring any more disasters, I can fit in 2 cycles before fall term starts. So fingers xed that I can collect something viable with those two cycles.

Any questions?:  I'm feeling really nervous about going on BC again, even if it's a nuvaring. I totally understand why they want to downregulate me, because my ovary is obviously way too fast out the gate with the early follicles, and so obviously something needs to be done about that. Still, I'm very tempted to call my clinic and ask if they can suggest any other options. I still haven't received my updated calendar from them. I get the feeling their nurse coordinator is way overworked.

GTKY:  Are you a Savory or Sweet kind of person? Share your favorite meal in the category. If i had to choose one or the other I'd definitely go savory, but really it's the combination of the two that is where it's at, which is why I very often will opt for Thai or Vietnamese food if given the opportunity. Also South Indian... I've had a gazillion amazing meals but the one that is coming back to me right now is this restaurant I repeatedly went to when I was staying in Chennai for about a month during my fieldwork. It was a chain restaurant (Saravana Bhavan), so I guess sort of like the Denny's of South India, but omg. All their stuff was amazing but I used to mostly get an uttapam, which is a really fluffy savory pancake-like thing made from a fermented lentil and rice batter and full of onions, tomatoes, chillies. You eat it with a salty vegetable soup with a slightly sweet tamarind base called sambar, and with several chutneys for dipping. One was a creamy cilantro-based cool, green, tingly sauce. Another was a creamy coconut-based thick sauce with mustard seeds in it, salty but the coconut makes it a bit sweet, and finally a hot red chilli sauce. Each bite of uttapam (eaten with the hand, it's an important part of the experience!) is dipped in the one (or several) dips of your choice. Also I was obsessed with the restaurant's juice bar, and especially with their grape juice, which was literally like a whole cluster of concord grapes sent through their juicing machine right in front of you and delivered up all frothy and thick, deep red-purple, and intensely acid-sweet.

acleverusername

@kiki047 oh sweet friend, there's not much more I can say that others haven't already said: your miscarriages aren't your fault. In fact, and I apologize for espousing TEW teachings so freely, but I really like how she frames it; she says "the pregnancy miscarried" and not "you miscarried" or "you had a miscarriage." Of course, never having had a miscarriage, I don't know if that subtle change in terminology helps at all. As for hope, I know it's hard to have it. A few weeks ago, I heard about the Miscarriage Hope Desk. Perhaps this is something that can help you deal with the TWW following your fresh transfer and the weeks/months ahead. Perhaps this story will resonate with you / give you hope. 

@bumblebee0210 I'm sorry that you're not feeling super confident about this cycle given only 5 large-ish follicles. I hope that your theory proves right though; that less is more. So, I'm really hoping for good news for you tomorrow. And to answer your question, I hope you only need 1-2 more ERs. You got this girl! I will have to check out the Zen Farmer story; thank you for sharing. 

@optimistgardener girl, way to Carpe Diem the heck out of this cycle! Thank God for your sweet friend who's willing to "donate on demand." And who knows, maybe the combination of cyst from last cycle, total loss of hope, the prospect of a new amazing job is the "protocol" you needed to get KU'ed! In terms of asking your clinic for a different way, I am surprised that not more clinics here are doing mid-luteal phase start. That's the "go-to" protocol my clinic uses for AMA and DOR. The rationale makes a lot of sense too: when your body is producing progesterone, any natural FSH production is shut down. So, when you flood your ovaries with FSH through injections, none of the follicles had "awoken" yet. Here's an article for you to read through. If nothing else, it's worth asking both about it, and about the EPP protocol that @bumblebee0210 mentioned in last week's thread. 

Diagnosis (if you've been):  sperm-driven fertilization issue with a side of egg-quality due to AMA

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): WTO

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  mid-luteal IVF cycle #1

How are things going?:  Great! Just waiting for my LH surge, and then I start meds 5 days laters. I'm hoping the LH surge comes sometime this weekend. Right now, my calendar has me coming in for my baseline on Friday, May 28. 🤞🏻 In the meanwhile, I'm just trying to get all my ducks in order: scheduling acupuncture appointments, taking melatonin, trying to eat healthy, finding my zen through meditation and learning the piano. I'm also trying to find a functional medicine doctor to work with to get my TPO antibodies under control as they have been increasing exponentially since my Hashimoto's diagnosis last July. Oh, and this week we also have a genetic counseling appointment; this time it's with a clinical geneticist so hopefully we'll get some insights as to what diagnostic / treatment MH will need, and if we need to PGT-M test our embryos. 

I also ran the proposed protocol by Dr. Aimee and she said that for my weight/age, it's the perfect protocol. Woot! Oh, haha, and last week I also learned that the #1 doctor I had wanted to go to, that I decided not to wait for (her first appointment was Jun 29) is leaving the clinic! So, just as well that I went with option #2!

I also have an update on my "progesterone study" since I continued it last cycle (also E2 levels). I did hCG micro-dosing with 20 units (i.e. 200IU) every day from 3-10DPO and also 200mg of prometrium 3-13DPO, and it really helped keep my progesterone levels up! Then again, when I brought this up with our new RE, he did confirm that vaginally inserted prometrium / endometrin delivers progesterone locally, so it won't reflect in the blood very much. But that doesn't mean that I don't have enough progesterone in the uterus. Anyways, enjoy these graphs & charts. 

Any questions?:  Not really. 

GTKY:  Are you a Savory or Sweet kind of person? Share your favorite meal in the category. Savory all the way. My favorite cuisine has to be Lebanese/Mediterranean food. I dated a Leb for almost 6 years, and his mom made the most amazing food, all of it from scratch. One of my goals in life is to go to Beirut and sample all of the food locally. This is gonna sound gross to some, but my favorite Lebanese meal is something called kibbeh nayeh. It's raw ground beef, cured with spices, eaten with pita bread and accompanied by arak (Lebanese liquor made from anise seed). I also have a sweet spot for Armenian cuisine, which is similar in some ways to Lebanese given geographical proximity. I remember eating some delicious food when I traveled to Yerevan on a work trip in 2017. 

photographerwife

Diagnosis (if you've been):  unexplained secondary IF, one Fallopian tube,  possible DOR? More on that below 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  tww

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  Waiting for my period to start. We will do IUI with letrozole if I ovulate on my left side with my remaining tube, and just a medicated cycle if it lands on my right. 

How are things going?:  I had a second appointment with my RE today for a baseline ultrasound and to check amh and progesterone. He said based on my ultrasound it looks like I have a low reserve because of the amount of follicles he saw. I didn’t ask how many. I’m wondering if I should have now.. I’m a little blindsided by it just because of my age, (27) I mean I assumed something else was wrong but idk. I’m a little shocked, and bummed. The amh test will take about a week to come back because they send it off. This feels like the next step in our journey, but the future, beyond this seems so far off. 

Any questions?:  what prenatals are we taking now? I keep seeing different recommendations, but I’d love a good gummy rec, because I hate pills. 

GTKY:  Are you a Savory or Sweet kind of person? Share your favorite meal in the category. 

Savory food. I’m less cultured than the rest of you, a southern girl born and raised. But I love most things, especially if it’s spicy! 

@kiki047 so so many thoughts and prayers for you this cycle, and hopefully a healthy long pregnancy. I know nothing I say will erase those feelings about rpl, it’s so shitty that this has been your story so far and I pray you reach the end very soon. I think donating your meds is awesome, and I don’t blame you for not wanting to do it through the clinic. I just don’t see them actually donating them to the public. And all of your meals sound delicious, I don’t even eat mushrooms, but my husband would die over those balsamic ones. 

@bumblebee0210 sorry you’re not feeling so optimistic about the low start, but im hoping this cycle is a good one for you! 💕 if you haven’t been told lately, you are so strong! 

@optimistgardener glad your friend could help out, even if it feels like being benched. I totally feel you. I was actually just listening to a podcast today and the girls were saying how much they hated the nuva ring and how they wouldn’t do it again because it made them feel crazy, so maybe asking is not a terrible idea... 

@acleverusername fx that this cycle works for you! All of that food sounds sooo good! 

acleverusername

@photographerwife I am soooo sorry that you got what seems to be a DOR diagnosis; hopefully once you get your AMH value, it will give you more information. Did you already get your FSH tested? Also, did the RE look at both ovaries, when he did the AFC? I think that you have a good plan in place with IUI. More in spoiler because TW for LC: 

Because you already have a history of successful pregnancy, you have a lot working in your favor despite a DOR diagnosis (which is what it sounds like). So, stimulating with Letrazole and doing an IUI to help your left ovary do what it needs to do will hopefully do the trick. DOR really starts to matter when you start looking into IVF because it essentially means it'll likely take you more cycles to get the number of embryos needed for the family size that you want. Don't forget, too, that you have your young age working in your favor so, if you do end up doing IVF, you're more likely to get good-quality embryos faster. I hope this is at least somewhat encouraging. Btw, @krash_ was in the same situation and I believe it took her 2 (or 3) IUI cycles to get KU'ed with #2. The cycle that worked was when she had the follicle on the functioning Fallopian Tube side. So, have faith! 

acleverusername

@photographerwife forgot to add: we had a discussion about prenatal vitamins a few weeks back and I believe @inthewoods23 is the winner with gummy prenatal that has all the good stuff. Paging @inthewoods23 to state what brand she's taking. 

inthewoods23

@acleverusername I'm here! Lol

@photographerwife Smarty Pants gummies!! They are sooo tasty! I often buy them at Target when they're on sale and/or there's a Target circle offer for 20% off.

They have a capsule version now too for anyone interested. Percentages are pretty comparable to what they put in the gummy minus 1 or 2 things and it does have iron in it.

bows22

@kiki047 ❤️ I know, you know, and everyone who has been on TTGP with you knows that you’ve done absolutely everything you could to give every embryo/baby the best chance. Rooting so hard for you, friend. 

@o@optimistgardener I’m glad you have some kind of shot this month! And I don’t think it would hurt to ask about other options? Obviously you know more than the average patient and they may appreciate the discussion.

@a@acleverusername I’m glad Dr. Aimee is on board with your protocol! I feel like time is going so slowly until you get started, I can’t imagine how you must feel haha 

@photographerwife ugh I’m sorry for the not-great news. Hopefully when you do the bloodwork things are fine and this was just a weird cycle. Fingers crossed for left side ovulation! I don’t know if you
saw but I have to have a polyp removed so that I can do IUI so we won’t be IUI buddies, so I’ll just have to use my energy to root for you instead!

bows22

Diagnosis (if you've been): unexplained,AMA,endometrial polyps/thickening 

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA): TWW

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?) Endometrial biopsy which showed a polyp 

How are things going?: We barely tried this month which is fine. I know we are supposed to TTA with my polyp but I we had already had FW sex when I got the results so we technically have a shot but I’m not hopeful (won’t stop me from testing though). I should get AF later this week and I may not check in here much while I’m benched but I’ll definitely be reading and sending you all of the positive vibes I can muster. And you can bet if I get a call that my hysteroscopy is moved up that you guys will be the first to know!

Any questions? Nope

GTKY: can I say sweet/savory combo? There’s this restaurant near us that has this amazing creamy pasta with chicken and pistachios that I would consider sweet & savory. Or this dish I had at a restaurant in Boston that was butternut squash tortellini with a cheesy sauce. And now I’m starving haha

photographerwife

@acleverusername I did maybe a year ago with my pcp, and I think it was borderline? Between normal and getting high but then we checked t4 and it was normal. That’s the thyroid right? It’s been a while so I don’t remember the exact results. He did look at both ovaries. But he didn’t seem optimistic about the left tube picking up an egg from that right ovary, he said it’s rare. But hopefully the amh will be me a better idea of what to expect if we need to go down the ivf route. We’ll probably do 3-4 rounds of iui unless something comes up. That is encouraging, thank you. 💕  and you’re the best remembering the prenatal! I read the boards even if I don’t have time to post, but my memory isn’t that great! 

@inthewood23 thank you! I die every time I try to swallow those horse pills! 

@bows22 maybe! It would be my luck though. I just found this today and it couldn’t be more accurate. 

And I did see about your polyp. Are you scheduled for august? I hope that this time around it’s smooth sailing and you can get right back to it.  I hate that we’ve been doing this so long together. We may have not been cycle buddies anyway. He thought he say the corpus whatever on my left ovary today, so if they alternate it’ll be on the right next cycle. Constantly thinking and praying for you. 💕 

zwink1

Hi everyone.  Just dipping my toe in the water and introducing myself for now.  I look forward to getting to know you all better and participating more, but for now I want to say best of luck to you @kiki047, RPL is beyond shitty and absolutely none of this is your fault.  FX for good news @bumblebee0210 and @acleverusername.  

I'll spare everyone the in-depth breakdown on our TTC/IF/IVF history unless it becomes more relevant.  I was a regular participant on this board in 2016-2018, but much has changed since then.      

Diagnosis (if you've been):  MFI (OAT - a/k/a everything's down).  Sort of also have a partial diagnosis for an ovulatory dysfunction and potential endometriosis, but we left most of my stuff unexplored because H's diagnosis left us with IVF w/ ICSI as pretty much our only option anyway.  

Status (WTO/TWW/TTA):  Not really benched, but waiting for our initial consult with our new RE right now, so not really moving either.  

What are you doing this cycle? (Testing? Treatment?):  Just waiting.    

How are things going?:  My prior RE and her partners closed their practice and she moved out of the area last May.  She was fantastic and the idea of having to replace her knocked the wind out of my sails for a while.  One of her partners was my OB for over a decade and replacing them both has been challenging.  An acquaintance who dealt with IF and currently works as an RN in reproductive health referred me to a new RE, and despite the longish wait time I'm most comfortable moving in that direction, so we're settling in for the wait and hopefully won't experience too many delays after the initial consult given our history.   

Any questions?:  Not for me.  How are all of you doing?

GTKY:  Are you a Savory or Sweet kind of person? Share your favorite meal in the category. 
I like sweets in the form of candy, but am not much for cakes/pies/desserts, so I guess that makes me more of a savory person.  I love stuffed portabella mushrooms and am not super picky about the stuffing.  

optimistgardener

👋 Hey @zwink1! 👋 I'm newish to the board but sadly not new to struggling to conceive. Glad to meetcha.

Thanks @acleverusername, @photographerwife, and @bows22 for pushing me to call the clinic. I did today and got a call-back from their junior phone wrangler with whom I had sort of a confused conversation (she was clearly like: hey lady I don't know anything about IVF protocols I just handle the phones around here, and I was like: what are words I have forgotten what they mean), but she did promise to get their head nurse coordinator to call me soon so hopefully that convo will make more sense. 🤪

Thanks also to @inthewoods23 for the gummies rec. I'm such a weenie about swallowing pills. Facing one less pill every day would be amazing.

krash_

*lurker* 

Thanks for the tag @acleverusername

TW pregnancy @photographerwife

My HSG showed my right tube was blocked (although my OB and RE said it might not have actually been blocked) but we did two rounds of letrozole + TI. My RE said because we had proven fertility with DS and MH only had mild MFI (low morph and that is the least important sperm quality) that IUI wouldn't give us any better chance than TI and it was our choice. The first cycle I ovulated on my right and had 2 or 3 mature eggs, BFN. The second cycle I had just one mature egg on my left side (known open side) and we only got one timing in 48 hours after trigger and we were successful. I hope you are just as successful with your letrozole! My RE also had me on estridiol and progesterone but pretty low doses. Feel free to PM me if you have more questions. 

kiki047

Thanks ladies, TTCAL is hard and sometimes I forget that I have the capacity to forgive myself too, for things that are completely beyond my control. 

@BusinessWife sending you hugs right back. I can't begin to imagine the emotions that come along with knowing this is your last embie. You're so right though, we're all just doing the best we can with what we've been given.
@bumblebee0210 thinking of you today for your ER! and thank you, friend, I needed to hear those reassurances this week. Especially the part about the "do everything" fallacy. MH asked me when we quit keto if I'm going to always look back and wonder if maybe that would have changed the outcome (because he didn't want me to blame myself), and I assured him at the time that whatever is going to happen would've happened anyway. Of course I still lie awake at night not truly believing that, but it's true, plenty of people get pregnant without needing to count macros and purge the house of BPA and take 25837 vitamins and supplements, and and and... 
@optimistgardener your update sounds like things are headed in the right direction for you! Bless your on-demand donor-friend who came through for you this cycle. And that's great news about the potential job! FX!!
@acleverusername I'm so excited for you to get this stim cycle started. It really does sound like you have everything perfectly aligned, even with your choice of RE now knowing what you know about your 1st choice leaving the clinic. I know not everything is a guarantee but as a fellow type A, I appreciate and admire your approach to all of this. 
@photographerwife I'm sorry for the uncertain news you got this week. I'll be keeping my FX for your results to come back. I am not usually the type to spew inspirational stories but when it comes to DOR, I know first hand how wrong they can be sometimes. And +1 for the Smarty Pants gummy prenatals. If you like gummy candies, they have no weird after-taste and the texture is like a soft ju jube. I think the dosage is 6/day.
*TW* mention of LC

MH's ex wife was told she had DOR and was in early menopause when she was around your age. They did 2 rounds of IVF and yielded only a single egg even with stims. 3 years later, after they split up, she went on to have 2 kids within a 2 year span, spontaneously, without ART. Part of me wonders if it was just negligence on their RE's part, but I know others who have been told they have DOR but who still ovulated, and who went on to have healthy, normal pregnancies and THBs. There is still hope! 

@zwink1 thank you so much   I think I recognize you from back in 2017-2018. Welcome back! I hope everything goes well with the new RE and you're not waiting forever. 


AFM, I hope it's ok that I continue to hang out here for a bit. I do plan on taking a bit of a hiatus this weekend and next week regardless of the outcome of my HPT/beta so don't be alarmed if/when I disappear. Am always around via PM either way! 

acleverusername

@bumblebee0210 Happy Retrieval Day! Wishing you many mature eggs retrieved!

@bows22 I really hope you can get in for your hysteroscopy sooner than August! But until then, please continue to hang a with us. That pasta with pistachios sounds amazing! And lol... you’re right, the waiting to get stims started isn’t much fun. I suspect only 1 more week to go! 🤞🏻 

@zwink1 I has to look up what OAT was and holy cow that’s a long word. Lol. Say that 10x. I love that you call your embryos “snow globes” ❤️ Sounds like you’ve got a great plan in place with your new RE even if it means waiting for a few months. 

@optimistgardener I do love your way with words; hopefully the “junior phone wrangler” got the message to the head nurse and you’ll get some answers soon.

@kiki047 I love it when you hang around. So please continue to do that! And also... Type A’s unite!!! Oh, and I forgot to mention about my blood tests / AFC checks when I did my retrieval in Canada... I had no clue what was happening while going through the ER since there was no portal to refer to. And the nurses never gave me the results when they called with instructions. I was _so_ uninformed. I only found out all of this stuff 1 year later once I requested my archives from the clinic (needed those to share with clinics in the US).  

[Deleted User]

@zwink1  :) So glad to see you here.  Hopefully we will both get lucky before too very long!  I'm sorry about the stress of switching all the providers.  FX once you get face to face with everyone and the ball gets rolling everything will fall straight into place. <3


AFM: I have been throwing myself into things to keep me occupied regardless of what happens.  I DLd and updated MFP again so that I can help keep myself honest and start tracking my calories / macros again.  I lost a TONNE of weight with it before, and I know I can do it again if I put my mind to it.  I also know if this doesn't go well, it will be important for me to have something healthy like that to channel my energy into.  We have also been wanting to move for some time, but being primarily self-employed, the whole thing seemed a little daunting.  So I am getting some solid info back today on the home front FINALLY, which obviously if we can get pre-qualified, then house hunting and moving would be another really awesome distraction from sitting in what could potentially be some very hard feelings to process.  I have a bunch more little phonecalls to make here with my last day off (for the time being), and a couple errands to run out for, all before I turn into a pumpkin at 5PM, so I will just keep if brief and try to lurk as I can. <3 <3 <3

GL today!!! @bumblebee0210

optimistgardener

sending @bumblebee0210 lots of good vibes.

AFM, I chatted today with the main nurse, who laid things out as follows:

1) her top choice would be (I believe I understood her correctly) a luteal-phase start without use of bcps but using my existing drugs: menopur/gonal-f/cetrotide. However, she says that it might be hard to get the timing right on this (i'm not sure i understand the reasons why... possibly it's a timing issue for them since their clinic is pretty small and their calendar is, i sense, a bit packed).

2) a mid-luteal start using lupron plus the menopur/gonal-f but minus the cetrotide. I just did a bunch of reading on this and now i'm feeling kinda iffy about it, but on the phone she said they have had good results. But, she wants me to think hard about it for cost reasons, i.e., i've already purchased cetrotide, which i would no longer be using, but i would have to buy lupron (which is expensive).

3) the nuvaring option with the short stim drug threesome they had already laid out for me. Since they already sent me home with the nuvaring and instructed me to use it as the default plan, i'm now a little confused as to why this is the nurse's last choice on the list?? Maybe it's a case of the nurse and the doctor having different opinions about things? Sigh.

I've just sent her an email to ask for a little more clarity on option 1. Maybe with a little pressure i can make them make room for me on their calendar. I kind of hate being the annoying patient.

Regardless, she says we can wait to make a final decision until CD1, at which point the calendar may push things one way or the other.

[edits for typos]

bumblebee0210

Thanks for the well-wishes. We got 2 eggs . It’s hard not to feel like this cycle was a giant waste of time, but who knows. I had 5 follicles but the doctor said there was just nothing in the other three. I’m hoping it’s just a weird anomaly this cycle, but I’m pretty sure this will be the push we need to switch to estrogen priming.

optimistgardener

@bumblebee0210 dangit dangit i'm so sorry. i'll keep my hopes up for good results from those two eggs, though, and hopefully the estrogen priming option will treat you better next time around.

kiki047

@bumblebee0210 oh friend, I'm so sorry. I hope those are 2 of the best eggs you've ever produced, and this cycle doesn't turn out to be a total bust. FX for you!! Hope you get some rest and maybe indulge in a few of your favourite things to let your body recovery. You've sure been through a lot these last few months.   

acleverusername

@bumblebee0210 dang girl, that totally really sucks. I am sorry. Creepy internet hugs incoming. I hope the EPP protocol will give you better results. 

@optimistgardener I'm super happy you got some more options from your doctor, but yo - that sux that the protocol you were previously given was the last one on the nurse's list. Hopefully you'll get more clarity AND get on the clinic's calendar with a luteal phase start. Don't feel bad about being an annoying patient; and in fact stop calling it "being annoying." You are advocating for yourself, which, quite frankly is necessary. What's annoying is that it's necessary. Good luck!

kiwi2628

@zwink1 heyyyyy! Its good to see you again!  I'm toe-dipping here myself while waiting to start my FET cycle

[Deleted User]

@kiwi2628  Wow!!!!  It's a regular reunion over here! lol  Welcome back!

zwink1

@kiki047, I was going to say that your un sounded familiar as well, but I wasn't 100% sure.  Thank you, and I hope that you continue to hang around but totally get the need for a hiatus.  

@acleverusername, lol, yeah I gave up trying to spell all that out a long time ago.

@BusinessWife, I'm so, so happy to 'see' you again.  It's great to see how far you've come, but I understand how much further you want to go and I have all of my fx for you guys this cycle.  

@bumblebee0210, empty follicles that give you false hope suck.  That said, I am rooting hard for your 2 eggs!!

@kiwi2628!!!  I'm feeling like we're having a reunion over here or something!  Yeesh, I never expected to find this many familiar faces when I made my way back here.  ❤

Edit:  typos - I need better spell check.  

bumblebee0210

Just a quick update: this cycle was officially a bust, and we are moving to estrogen priming. I was expecting this, so I am obviously bummed about it, but I'm doing ok. It will be nice to go almost a whole 4 weeks without pumping my body full of hormones again...

acleverusername

@bumblebee0210 I am so sorry. Pardon me while I spew TEW wisdom here: she often says that if you get those kinds of results, it’s a sign from your ovaries that they need to take a break so I think your plan is on point. 

optimistgardener

ah dang @bumblebee0210 i'm sorry. that sucks. i really hope the holiday helps your system recover and that the estrogen priming option will prove to be the thing you need.

kiki047

Ugh @bumblebee0210 I'm so sorry. Sending you internet stranger hugs. I hope the break and your upcoming holiday are everything you need to get some R&R and hit the ground running again with your EPP cycle. 

kiki047

Just a quick update this morning, I had a BFN on a FRER this morning at 8dp5dt so I'm out. I think we're going to explore the RI route, there are a few clinics up here who offer some immunology services. @keikilove I think you're the only one on here who's currently working with/has worked with a reproductive immunologist? I hope it's ok if I pick your brain later... 

acleverusername

@kiki047 😭😭😭 are you sure it’s not too early though? Isn’t it true that transfers usually take a bit longer to register on HPT? In any case, it’s good to hear you have access to immunology resources in Canada. I know that @keikilove had posted a full list of testing she’s done to this thread: MHTFH / Blood Clotting thread (tried to link to it from mobile and no dice; last updated in early March).

kiki047

@acleverusername YGPM

[Deleted User]

I'm so sorry @kiki047 Sending you lots of hugs as you move forward <3 Hopefully that's all it takes is a couple tweaks to your transfer protocol. :/

keikilove

Hey friends! Doing my usual late check-in; been trying to keep up w lurking all week but too many posts to respond to until this free time. 

@bumblebee0210 I’m sorry for the bust of a cycle. It definitely seems like the right choices to take some time off to let your ovaries rest and to try estrogen priming for the next cycle. I was surprised your RE was doing truly back-to-back-to-back cycles, as that is known to often over-suppress the ovaries when dealing with DOR. I hope you will enjoy the four weeks of no meds (hooray!) and feel great once you get going on retrievals again. FX your summer plans aren’t interrupted by a little downtime from all this! 

@optimistgardener Congrats on the potential job stuff moving forward! Very exciting. And hoping that your friend coming through with his little swimmers is all that you need! But if IVF is indeed the path ahead, I second what Clever said: advocate for yourself as hard as you need to. You’re the one spending all this money and time to get your take-home baby—it’s ok to “inconvenience” the clinic to get the best plan and outcome for YOU. Like you, my instincts are NO birth control of any sort. My body clearly does not like that route. I’ve done estrogen priming for my last egg retrieval and will be doing estrogen priming in luteal phase for the next round of IVF/egg retrieval in June. I agree with your instincts that option #1 is your best bet, and the Lupron protocol is your next best. (I did that Lupron protocol for my first IVF. It was ok.) 

@kiki047 I’m so sorry the transfer did not work.😢 Seeking out Reproductive Immunologist support sounds like the right move at this stage in your experience. I’m more than happy to answer any questions or provide any support I can in that regard. I actually just saw some Canadians post yesterday about where they go in Vancouver and Toronto for RI treatment, happy to send those names along to you since RIs are few and far between. 

Going to catch up on this thread and more tags throughout the day. 

AFM: We are headed to MH’s sperm analysis, and if things finally look good we are doing one more IUI today. Long story, but they couldn’t schedule his sperm analysis in advance of today like I wanted. We’ve been benched this month, but some things are pressing us to move forward with trying some different treatments to help implantation. (Like @bumblebee0210 & @optimistgardener, summer is my best time to get this stuff done due to heavy work schedule in fall.) If MH’s sperm analysis is no good then no IUI today and endometrial biopsy next week instead. Also, I missed catching my surge this cycle (I think it happened when I slept Wednesday night) and I was awakened at 4 this morning with killer ovulation cramps. Hoping I didn’t already ovulate when we get to the appointment in a few hours. We’ll see how this goes...

optimistgardener

@keikilove just a quick note here because i'm supposed to be doing Other Important Things but thanks for your encouragement, and also SOLIDARITY on the ovulation cramps front... Mine are like a force of nature and seem to get more that way every month. My doc says it's nothing to worry about and that it can be an inflammatory response to the release of blood into the abdominal cavity with rupture, not associated with infertility. But still wtf. I used to have terrible period cramps (much much improved after my myomectomy!) but these days it's the ovulation cramps that really get me.

@kiki047 i've been thinking of ya.

optimistgardener

also @keikilove my understanding is that IUIs may be more effective when they take place a few hours after follicle rupture. So even if ovulation already happened, the timing could be great! I hope the doc agrees.

acleverusername

@keikilove how did it go today?

@optimistgardener any more clarity from tour clinic?

optimistgardener

Hey @acleverusername! No more clarity yet but I'll bug them on Monday. I hope things go well for everyone around here this coming week. I'm gonna be largely absent (my revised IVF calendar has at the very least allowed me to join my mom and her partner for some camping).