Say What?!

stlbuckeye132

Full disclosure: I stole this from May, but it sounds fun/entertaining!

This is the place to share, rant, talk about all the random annoying and/or inappropriate comments you get throughout pregnancy and how best to respond (politely) and what you wish you really had the guts to say to the person's face.  It could be something coming from a well-intentioned family member, a doctor with poor bedside manner, or a total stranger who thinks it's appropriate to advise you on your condition...  anything someone has said to you that makes your head spin, share it here!  

JessDG

This made me laugh more than angry, but I thought I would share.  I have a colleague who is around my age and is divorced and had been married to a single mom, so he ended up having 2 little kids while he was married.  
I said something in front of him about being pregnant and...

Him:  You're pregnant?  Don't you already have a kid? 
Me:  Yes, we're having another one.
Him:  Well how old is your son?
Me:  2 and a half
Him:  Ohhhhh, he's not 3 yet.  If he was already 3 you'd DEFINITELY not have another kid.  
Me: ......

Apparently his step son really left a lasting impression on him when he was 3.  haha 

meanjellybean

@JessDG lol at "don't you already have a kid?"

I don't think I've gotten anything super weird yet but when I was pregnant with DD I worked in for the state legislature and there were lots of super old, super white and male Republican electeds who loved to make comments about my belly. "I've heard of inflation but this is ridiculous!" And the ever popular "are you sure you've only got one in there?" Har har har.

modoodles

My sister was asking if we had a name picked yet and I told her no, but we were open for suggestions because I like almost nothing. So she sent a bunch of names (which I also hated) and when I didnt like the names she sent, (seriously? Huxley?! Dafuq is that?) She said I should just let DH name him since this is his first baby. I told her that no, this is just as important to me as the 1st, so now she's mad and not talking to me 😂

stlbuckeye132

I taught a Pure Barre class yesterday morning (in a fairly loose tank, nothing form-fitting), and afterwards I had a client say, "oh your baby bump is so cute! I was staring at it the whole class!" I just sort of stared at her and gave her a weird look because you guys, I still do not have a "baby bump." Yes my stomach is expanding, but I'm not at the point where someone would look at me and think I'm clearly pregnant. Also, it's super weird/uncomfortable to know you were staring at my stomach for 50 minutes straight. She then proceeded to ask me approximately 72 questions (including where I'm delivering, who my dr is, etc... dang lady, do you just want to be in the room with me?!) and conclude by saying, "oh I just love pregnant people. They're so fun." Glad I could help be your entertainment for the day.

meanjellybean

@modoodles being open to suggestions was your first mistake 

@stlbuckeye132 wtf?? That lady clearly has no chill. Also "I love pregnant people" like you're an exhibit at the zoo or something lol.

blaf322

I just love this thread @meanjellybean the inflation joke  bahahahaha... it's so bad it's funny (for me... way less funny when you're experiencing it).

I have been fortunate enough to not run into any truly dumb people... or my face just lets them know they shouldn't say dumb shit to me lol. Either way, I'm grateful and just here to read this hilarity.

bluguitarhannah

@modoodles People get mad over the dumbest things.  It's not your kid contain your emotions.  The name was one of the only things my wife has been excited about it and I ended up letting her pick.  We agreed on nothing as options. 

Pascal86

Nothing so far, but my favorite was when I was like 36 weeks pregnant with my first, a lady at the gym seeing me, then going into the bathroom stall to use the toilet while loudly telling me the horror story of what her daughter went through giving birth recently. I was like, am I supposed to stand here while you take a shit and listen to your terrifying birth story about someone else, when I’m about to give birth? No thanks.

Then when I was pregnant with my second, my favorite comment was from this guy who worked at the 7-11 right by my work. We went there a lot and always chatted with him, and his wife had recently had their 3rd kid. I think he was from the Philippines , and no idea if this was a cultural thing or not... but when I went in one time near the end of my pregnancy, he asked me if I was still driving. I said yes, and he looked shocked, and said he hid his wife’s car keys and wouldn’t let her drive in the last couple weeks when she was pregnant. 🙈😂 That would not fly in my marriage!

meanjellybean

@Pascal86 it's my personal belief that all bathroom-talkers should be rounded up and taken to an island somewhere. Maybe bathroom-talkers who tell birth stories to pregnant women should get their own island.

stlbuckeye132

@modoodles idk, I think maybe you should reconsider Huxley! lol

modoodles

@stlbuckeye132 and here I thought we would be friends 😂😂

bluguitarhannah

@modoodles Huxley is too close to Huxtable for me and then evokes Bill Cosby.  Not an association I'd want. 

modoodles

But if anyone else gets desperate, please feel free to "steal" these other names she suggested:

Slate
Cato
Gibson
Jaxtyn
Stetsyn

meanjellybean

@modoodles I'm dying at "Jaxtyn"

stlbuckeye132

@modoodles yikes.....

kristinl492

@modoodles I’m truly sorry if anyone in here is considering those names and I’m about to offend you, but I hate those so hard. Lol. Especially Stetsyn. Why not just keep the original spelling for an already ridiculous name? 

modoodles

@kristinl492 😂 I told her I dont really like made up names, or extra x or ys thrown in there. She said, "well someone had to make up everybody's name at some point!" LOL for days. 

mrsdrez

@modoodles my husband's "work boyfriend" has a son named Huxley. He's cute. lol.

When I was about 36 weeks pregnant with my first my sister-in-law got married. My husband's uncle (in law) (not that it makes a huge difference, but thought I would point that out) told me before the ceremony that he's  "always liked the look of a pregnant woman, something sexy about it" and then continued to creep me out and I avoided him like the plague for the rest of the evening. I have the heebie jeebies just thinking about it now. 

stlbuckeye132

@mrsdrez ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew

Fullhandsfullheart

I haven’t heard too many comments yet because we’ve only announced to family and I’m not really showing much (especially with a coat on while I’m out),  but I’m sure the comments will start rolling in as I get bigger. It’s my 4th so I’m already anticipating some rude questions.

 So far we’ve gotten a couple “was this planned?” And “were you trying?” I find that incredibly rude to ask.. I mean talk about nosy! One of these days I’m going to respond with, “yes we were trying. Do you want to know what position we used too?” 

kristinl492

@modoodles Same, I’m pretty big on classic names/spellings. But, I mean she’s not wrong about names being made up at some point...it’s just the names she’s making up that suck 😂

@mrsdrez EW. Whyyyyy would anyone feel the need to speak that aloud to the pregnant woman?? 

blaf322

@modoodles bahahaha... those are all TERRIBLE!

b_1029

@modoodles just gonna drop this here https://www.facebook.com/treynkennedy/videos/450706385506920/ 

modoodles

@b_1019 hahahaha "in the beginning god made that name and it was not good" 😂

mrs_sheddy

modoodles a girl doing my hair was talking about baby names to me and she said her son was Jackson and I said I love that! And she said "Yeah! It's just there are so many Jack's or Jackson's so we spell it Jaxson". I'm not a fan of the X's either... 

This weekend we announced on social media that I'm pregnant, so some coworkers were congratulating me today when they saw me. One of the ladies came up and touched my belly and said "oh, you do have a little belly going!" I was so caught off guard. I'm only 15 weeks, so there really isn't much there! This never happened during my first pregnancy, even at the very end. Also I can probably count on my hands the amount of times I've spoken to this person.

kristinl492

@b_1029 hahahahahahha 

blaf322

@mrs_sheddy I'm actually okay with an X in Jaxon. I feel like that's become more normal. The added S to go along with it makes it wrong... but just an X instead of ck doesn't bother me in this case.

bluguitarhannah

The thought of naming your child after a hat but not spelling it right gets me.  Stetsyn wtm and I'm from Texas where I could easily have a neighbor with that name.

stlbuckeye132

@Fullhandsfullheart omg please say that to anyone who asks if it was planned. That's so rude! I've not had anyone ask me this time, but apparently MH had a few coworkers ask him that.

@mrs_sheddy slap her hand if she tries that again! Or touch her stomach and ask how she likes it. Idk why people think just because you're growing a baby they suddenly have free reign to touch your body.

Pascal86

@modoodles I actually like the name Slate! Not like, to the point where I’ll use it, though. But all of those names give such a specific vibe, how could someone be offended that you’re just not into that one specific style? My mom gave me a list of baby name ideas (at my request) for DD2, and there were names like Tara, Erin, and Amber on the list. I felt bad, but it was just not a list of names that are my style at all, even though perfectly nice names. She didn’t care though, it’s just fun brainstorming with people. 

kc0711

This one goes to my mother. And I will preface this by saying that she is a nurse, a very highly educated nurse. 

“Are you still breastfeeding DD? I mean you really should stop. And are you still going to be nursing her when the new baby gets here? I need to know so I can mentally and emotionally prepare myself for that.”

...you need to mentally and emotionally prepare yourself to possibly see me breastfeed a two year old and an infant?? Uhh what?? Granted she also told me I should start weaning DD at 9 months. I’ve explained to her the importance of breastfeeding, and as a healthcare provider you would think she knows. But yes, the idea I might still be nursing my two year old is just too much for her to handle. 

knockupthestock

DH and I skyped his grandma and grandpa last night to tell them that we are pregnant and the first thing she said was "ugh, your mother fibbed to us" (we asked my MIL not to tell anyone, so she hadnt, and I guess it came up before we called and MIL "lied" for us) and then asked us how long we knew. we told her since November, and she was like "you know, you couldve called us anytime to tell us". Um, we didnt want to tell you until now....and now I'm regretting telling you now. You could at least try to be excited for your great grandchild. I know you have multiple already, but whatever, you can be mad at us for not telling you as soon as we conceived.

kristinl492

@kc0711 Should’ve told her to warn you before she says ridiculous things because you needed to mentally and emotionally prepare yourself to hear such nonsense. She should know the amazing health benefits you’re providing to your daughter! People get very opinionated about something that doesn’t affect their own lives at all 🤷🏼‍♀️

Pascal86

@knockupthestock love it when people focus on the really important things... like the timing of your sharing great news is way more critical to discuss than the news itself!

Speaking of great-grandparents, I was at my mom's a couple months ago when she shared the news that my cousin had just given birth. My grandpa's response: "well I'm glad that's over." I think he meant because she had a long / difficult labor that ended in a c-section, but that's literally all he said, and his delivery was so flat I was cracking up. And like, good to know he doesn't give a shit when the great-grandkids are born. 

rjk0427

@modoodles I think our sisters went to the same school of ridiculousness! When taking about names this weekend, we shared that we’re between Henry and Oliver but leaning much farther towards Oliver. My sister grimaced, shook her head, and then said “gross.” Seriously wtf?!  
Similarly my MIL suggested Henry not knowing it was on our list and after we said it was, she then pushed for the name half of our gender reveal and has just about ruined Henry for me now. 

nursejenn5

this wasn’t  for me but I remember at my sisters baby shower my aunt(loud obnoxious annoying) practically yells and goes “so are you gonna have him circumcised?” In front of all the friends and distant family. Poo dear great great mormon  grandma. 

I can’t want to see what comes up next for me from her cause she ha no filter. 

kristinl492

@rjk0427 chiming in here to say that we’re also in between Henry and Oliver!. Those 2 and Charlie are our top contenders. We will likely keep our final name choice to ourselves to avoid unwanted opinions 🙄

pocketrose

I've been at a conference all day and these are giving me life lol

hbird0723

This thread is awesome and @modoodles that is some list of names 😂

This pregnancy we’ve had a lot of rude comments as shared before from You shouldn’t be doing that you’re going to lose the baby to my poor husband getting how old will you be when she graduates and I guess you can only make girls 🙄 seriously! Do people not think before they speak? Anyway, I can’t think of any funny ones but I’m sure they’ll be coming! 

rjk0427

@kristinl492 great minds!! If Yoda was a girl, she would have been Charlotte called Charlie. I wish I didn’t say anything except that I honestly am out of effs to give when it comes to my sister.