Birth Plans Thread

suzycupcake

Here is the thread to share your birth plans and ask questions about birth plans! *some things taken from Nov'18

Some people think birth plans (or preferences) are only for people who want an unmedicated birth, but you can have preferences for many aspects of your birthing time that don't have anything to do with the relief of discomfort. At the very least, it's a good place to start thinking about your preferences and discussing them with your Doctor. 

1st Stage-the squeezing waves that bring your baby to you
2nd Stage- the actual birth of your baby
3rd Stage- birth of placenta
Newborn Care
Postpartum 

Here are some ideas for discussion:

What are you including in your birth plan?

Have you shared it with your Doctor/Midwife?

Anything you are especially concerned about?

Are there any areas where you and your Doctor/hospital aren't in complete agreement with your preferences or anything you think you will have to really fight for?

STM+ Anything you are changing this time around or anything you wish you had added the last time? Anything you would leave off? 

Some free resources:
Earth Mama free plan (a plan for all types of birth)
Parent 24 6 page plan
The Bump 6 page plan
March of Dimes 2 page plan in English and in Spanish 
Free Power Point file to customize your own visual birth plan
You can also use Google slides to create your own visual birth plan using these icons (save each image)

BigBadWolf12

Sweden is super awesome in terms of baby development and supporting both baby and mother as patients.  I probably won't have a recorded birth plan bc the things I care about are automatic in sweden unless there's an emergency....delayed cord clamping,  immediate skin to skin, baby stays with you always,  breast feeding support, etc. They also default to no meds unless/until you ask for them, so i don't feel like I need to prep myself to "battle" against people pushing more on me than I want during labour.  

With my last birth it was actually the opposite. ..I WANTED more assertive advice from them.  We were investigating if a vaginal birth attempt was a good idea bc baby was breech and the doctor was like "only in a true emergency should I give you advice bc there are risks both ways and it depends on the person which risks they feel more comfortable with." When I asked his opinion on cs vs vaginal.  Finally when they had all evidence collected he said "it's your choice bc there are risks either way, but I would suggest a planned cs for this baby" and i had so much relief to finally be given actual advice (but still feel in control and not forced)

They also do a home visit for baby's first appointment. Literally the nurse rode her bike here with her med bag on back like on call the midwife. 

sourlemon

Mines pretty simple if I make it to until my scheduled day. 

Show up when they tell me. 
Prep for OR.
Have a CS.
Recover. (DH goes with baby if baby had to leave the room)
Do all the newborn things. (See below)
Hate life for a few days. (They're the worst with a CS)
Go home. (Woohoo)

During the NB things and hate life phases, I'm just along for the ride. Whatever the hospital does is fine but I'm really go with the flow in this case.

The only thing we are adament on is no circumcision (which isn't automatic, but if you are having a boy you need to decide ahead of time). The other NB stuff (eye goop, bath, shots, hearing test, etc) we do at the hospitals schedule. 

zamoraspin

I need to start to think about this more seriously. Whenever I realize this baby is going to have to come out I kind of do this...



... and hope teleportation birth is invented by my due date.

lovelikestardust

@zamora_spin LMAO.

FTM here, and I've only just started thinking about this. I'm a giant wuss when it comes to pain, so I have SO MUCH respect and awe for women who give birth unmedicated, but it's not for me. Having migraines that meds sometimes won't help gives me a lot of appreciation for the power of modern medicine (UO?), and I can only imagine that giving birth will be worse in terms of pain levels, so I'll likely go with the epidural. I do know that I want DH with me and no one else unless we decide to hire a doula, but I need to talk to my OB to find out her stance on doulas at my next appointment.

Both my parents and my in laws are out of town, and DH and I haven't decided yet if we want them here for the birth (but not present at the actual delivery), or if we want some time alone with baby before throwing other people in the mix. This is somewhat complicated by the fact that hubby will most likely be back to work shortly after baby is born, so I'm a little worried about dealing with this tiny person all by myself, and maybe having my mom and MIL around will be helpful?

I'll definitely be keeping an eye on this thread to see what other mamas are planning!

(edited for formatting)

thirdtimesacharm2019

I’m with @sourlemon:

1. Show up
1b. Wait for doctor and anesthesiologist to coordinate their schedules
1c. Get really angry because I can’t eat
2. Have c-section 
2b. Hope I get to “keep” my baby after recovery (with DS2 I attempted to BF then he was very quickly taken back to special care). I know this isn’t something you can plan for, but I’m really hoping it’s more like DS1 where he’s in the room waiting for me and doesn’t have to go anywhere else. 
 

goldfishcraker

@zamora_spin 😂🤣😂🤣😂😂 omg! THAT IS SO EXACTLY RIGHT!!!! 🤣🤣😂

for me... At several close friends suggestions, we have decided to interview doulas. I'm still not sold, but I was unable to find any useful prenatal classes. I really want to do this med- free (though I won't be hard on myself if I end up needing gas or fentanyl.) So I wanted to learn breathing and pain relief massage techniques to use. But as I said, no success. So I figure my best option is to hire a doula who has a whole arsenal of techniques to try.

I do NOT want an episiotomy. 
Any other interventions are only in case of emergency. Of course I will do/allow whatever is necessary to bring this baby safely into the world.

I hope to labour at home for a while. When I'm sure it's real, call to alert my sister that she's on dog duty. She will stay at our place until we get home. She will also help introduce dog to baby (and take dog for a looooooong tiring walk before we get home haha).
Hopefully I can poop in the comfort of home before I leave, so I stress less about that haha.

I would like to BF right after delivery. But I'm aware that might not be possible.

Otherwise, we will play by ear/go by hospital schedule. I've been to enough births to know they usually don't go as planned haha. So I'm trying very hard to not get a rigid plan in my head. Trying to go with the flow...

I've had friends who planned everything out. "For 90 min, do this breathing technique. Then have a hot bath. Then move on to this breathing for 120 min. ..."
And then shit doesn't go to plan and they are devestated and thoroughly disappointed with the whole experience. So even though I'm a planner...I'm trying to remember that you can't really have a schedule for labour and  delivery. 

I'm trying to mentally prepare myself for 24+ hours of agony. Maybe I'll be one of the lucky ones who gets 'er done in only a few hours..... 🤣


I'm anxious about a few things.
1) *TW* of course my biggest fear is that something terrible happens. My PGAL brain, and medical brain keeps going over worst case scenario... End TW

2) pooping during labour. I KNOW it's not a big deal. Most of the deliveries I've attended have pooped. And it really really doesn't matter to anyone else in the room. But I'm petrified.

3) going 24+ hours without eating, getting hangry on top of the pain, and being a total bitch to my DH.

4) TW* post partum bleed. Just found out that I will be continuing the enoxaparin injections till 6 weeks postpartum. I already have a history of severe, near fatal post partum hemmorrage. I keep reassuring myself that there is a "cure" for enoxaparin. An injection that will instantly counteract the effects. I'm sure I'll be fine. But I'm still anxious". End TW

5) post partum recovery/pain. Maybe because I've always known labour and delivery is a painful brutal experience (lots of time to get used to the idea), but only relatively recently learned about the nightmares of postpartum....but I'm less anxious about pain during labour and delivery. More anxious about healing pain, "the first poop" or even peeing after. A friend gave me witch hazel spray the other day..and I've been freaking out since. Trying to take care of a NB while in pain, and sleep deprived? Oh man....

Others survive this. I can too!
Right?
....Hopefully....haha

emqbee

@chillycanadian I’ve been concerned about poop during labor too. The embarassment...omg. That said. I got to have a group class with the birth center I’m at and it includes moms to be and husbands/whoever they want to bring. That subject came up and one of the dads piped up and said, you know it’s really not a big deal. There’s so much happening and going on that you’re not really even giving your mind time to think about that. And I appreciated hearing that from a dad that’s been there before....I don’t mind that happening with the midwives/nurses whomever...it’s more because of MH. That said...I know he won’t care or make a big deal. It’s really just my mental block. 

goldfishcraker

@emqbee exactly! I bet if I poop, MH will be like.."aww man sorry guys, I farted" 😂 because he is sweet like that. He's seen it all before, and delivered several babies. But...man! I just don't wanna poop in front of him haha

newmamakt

@chillycanadian if you don’t mind me asking, why do you not want an episiotomy? 

becks68

@chillycanadian - my mh will probably make fun of me for it for years to come... but that’s our relationship  

suzycupcake

What are you including in your birth plan?
Here's what mine is so far, but we are going to try to labor at home for as long as possible:

*Please ask before touching me during each stage unless there is a medical emergency*

1st Stage- no students, quiet voices when entering, free movement, use of shower, no iv/heplock unless medically necessary, do not offer pain medication, free use of food/water, dim lights, natural membrane rupture, please be patient with the time it takes to progress, no cervical checks, intermittent monitoring
2nd Stage- no students, quiet voices when entering, free choice of position, dim lights, no directed pushing, warm compress on perineum, no episiotomy, touch head when crowning, no epidural, no pitocin, intermittent monitoring, allow my baby's body to be born spontaneously; don't pull, I will catch my baby. 
3rd Stage- leave vernix on my baby, immediate skin to skin, delayed cord clamping until it stops pulsating, partner to cut cord, no active management or controlled cord traction, no pitocin, no suctioning unless medically necessary
Newborn Care-delay exams for bonding, exams done in my presence, no eye ointment, no hep B, no PKU, no pacifier, no formula, no sugar water, no bath, do not retract my son's foreskin, no circumcision, do not force breastfeeding (we'd like to try the breast crawl)

Have you shared it with your Doctor/Midwife?
Not yet. Still working on it and about to order a visual birth plan because we heard care teams love them. Oooh that reminds me, even though we are low risk, I need to make a second plan in case of a C section. 

Anything you are especially concerned about?
Not really other than the normal anxieties that seem to come with the thought of birthing a baby. 

Are there any areas where you and your Doctor/hospital aren't in complete agreement with your preferences or anything you think you will have to really fight for?
There are probably several areas they won't be in complete agreement about, but Kaiser seems to be pretty pro- Mother directed birthing and respectful of it. I will have my husband and a Doula to help advocate for me. 

goldfishcraker

@newmamakt simply because it takes more time to heal than tearing naturally. Although that's anecdotally, and only a sample of 17 women who've had both. (As well as one OB nurse and a med student). But it's not a scientifically done study, so I can't make a recommendation from a medical standpoint. I can only use the info to make choices for myself. Though I wonder if I can find any papers on it...

(And again, I would do anything necessary to bring baby safely into the world. So if it were life and limb/death, of course I'll have them do anything necessary.)

Edit to clarify: I don't want it as a routine proceedure. Which it sounds like they don't usually do anymore anyway. But as a life saving intervention they can do what has to be done)

aecm

I’m actually feeling pretty laid back about my plans. Part of that is probably b/c all my preferences got thrown out the window during DD’s birth and it was A-OK in the end, and the other part of that is probably b/c I’ve been through it before and have a lot of faith in my OB and I LOVED the hospital where I delivered (and will be delivering again this time). 

Once again, I’m not making a hard list of demands, just a mental note of preferences. My OB is already aware and on-board with my desire to attempt a VBAC, assuming the conditions at the time are favorable. Twin deliveries usually take place in an OR in case things go south quickly, so I’ve come to terms with that. I haven’t been told that I’ll be required to have an epidural in place prior to delivery, but I know that’s another common requirement for twin deliveries...either way I’m 100% on board with that. I feel like I’m in the minority with my opinions on epidurals...but it made my birth experience with DD SO much more enjoyable. I could relax and take everything in...the time before my epidural is just a blur. So I’m probably going to be asking for it even sooner than I did last time!

I’d love to hold the twins as soon as they’re born, but since DD was whisked away immediately after delivery, I would probably be happy just getting a peek at them. If I get to try and BF within like, half an hour of birth, that would be fantastic. Honestly I’m really just hoping they won’t be itty bitty and need to head to the NICU. 

@newmamakt I would also prefer to avoid an episiotomy. I think @chillycanadian is correct about healing times being better if you “rip naturally” which is why episiotomies are not nearly as common as they used to be. 

We’ll def. be doing eye drops and the Hep B vaccination right away. Personally I don’t love the idea of circumcision by DH is adamant that it needs to happen...so I think I’ll defer to him. He clearly has more expertise in that area 🤣. I know the hospital delays the first bath until you’ve been transferred to the recovery area and are ready for a break - so usually the first time the baby gets taken to the nursery. I’m also a big fan of using the nursery at night so I can get a little sleep!

wanderlustsoul

Like @BigBadWolf12 many things I’d want is naturally done here anyways since they’re very much natural and intervention free focused in the Netherlands. 

I will do whatever is necessary for baby to be born healthy but in the best situation:

I want to avoid a c/s as much as possible. No episiotomy. I’ll labour at home as much as I can and then I want access to the birthing tub for labouring. Low lights, minimal sound, and let me do as I want.

They dont cut thé cord until it stops pulsating, baby is immediately given to you,  breastfeeding support, no pain meds unless you request, etc. They can do their newborn checks but I believe they’re done at home the next day.

You are typically released to go home within a few hours of birth and then you have a maternity nurse who comes to your house for 8 days and does all checks, cooks, cleans, and helps you just learn to be a mom and how to breastfeed. The newborn stuff is all done at home as they come to your house and the midwife comes to your home to check on you. 

zamoraspin

Can I raise questions on birth plans? I am trying to figure out what I would want and not totally understanding choices.

@suzycupcake Question on the eye ointment: what is your reason for refusing? Are you aware that almost everyone’s vagina contains bacteria/other pathogens that can cause an eye infection and blindness in your baby which can be prevented by the eye ointment? 

Episiotomy - I’ve seen a bunch of people say they don’t want one. Would love for STM and STM+ to weigh in. It is my understanding that a dr will do this when they know you will tear because the cut will heal much better than the tear. Is this not the case?

goldfishcraker

@zamora_spin I did a bunch of research on it yesterday after posting here.
Fascinating and horrifying.
The episotomy used to be routine (in North America at least) until they realized that healing rates were way longer, risks were way higher, with higher incidents of 4th degree tear, and that there is no benefit to a routine episiotomy.

Now they will do it in a few situations:
- baby is in distress, with slowing heart rate, and needs to be delivered quickly.
- mom has torn already but is tearing the wrong way (toward urethra)
- mom has torn already and it looks like it could progress to a 4th degree.  In that case, the doctor may do a diagonal episiotomy, in hopes to avoid the 4th degree tear. Diagonal cuts are less likely to become 4th degree, but are more difficult to repair, and heal slower.

Episiotomys are more likely to have complications after healing, such as painful intercourse.
A vertical episiotomy (like most normal natural tears) have a higher probability of causing 4th degree tearing, than a natural tear.
Apparently most natural tears are 1st degree, which means they are superficial, and don't even require stitches.

Basically, it sucks all around. But it definitely reinforced that I have to remember to put counter-pressure on the perenium when I'm assisting to deliver a baby! And the tiny pant-pushes when baby is crowning but head hasn't passed enough yet haha. I hope whomever is helping deliver this baby coaches me through that!

olivemomma

TTM and I’m pretty laid back on birth. I’ve never had a birth plan - I’ve always approached it as whatever is necessary to deliver baby safely I’m on board with. Lists tend to give me anxiety in already high pressure situations and the idea of checking or not checking off boxes or worrying everything is or is not going how I had it planned perfectly in my head has zero appeal to me while giving birth. To be fair, my DH works in healthcare and is incredibly informed and level headed which I think makes it easier for me to be more laid back. I can trust him to knowledgeably advocate for me in any circumstance that may arise and make the best choice for both me and the baby. I may feel differently if I didn’t have him in my corner. 

after birth I would like to hold baby as soon as possible. And yes to any vaccines, eye ointment, etc. My pro-vaccine stance starts from day 1.

@zamora_spin I had an episiotomy with DS (birth 2). His HR dropped and the cord was wrapped around his neck twice, so they cut me and suctioned him to out ASAP. Again, my approach is a safe and healthy baby regardless of what that may mean for me. However, if I could choose having had a vaginal birth with and without one, I am very much hoping to avoid it this go around. I found the recovery to be much longer and painful with the episiotomy (to be fair DS was also 1.5 lbs bigger than DD so that could have easily played a role as well).

*edited to add that I did tear and require stitches with my first birth as well so I feel a fairly decent comparison

purplg8r

Here’s what I have so far: (and all of this is if baby is safe. All can go out the window if baby is in danger)

-The least amount of people possible in the room 

-covered and draped as much as possible 

-delayed cordcutting  

-episiotomy only if necessary
-I’m not against an epidural but I don’t want it assumed I want one early 
-if I have to have a C-section, I’d like a gentle C-section (I need to check with my OB to see if they do this. ). 

olivemomma

@aecm FYI I’m also team epidural. I honestly don’t even know if I could have made it through birthing DD without one after laboring an entire day and only getting to 4cm (contractions were lasting 90 seconds at this point with about 30-40 second breaks). I still say I never knew pain until that day. I’ve thought briefly of going med free this go since it’s my third and last but I doubt I will. Being able to relax and take in my experience was invaluable to me. 

thirdtimesacharm2019

@purplg8r I had never heard of a gentle c-section (although this will be my third) until your post. I just assumed you give up the ability for skin to skin contact and delayed clamping, but it sounds like there are more options becoming available. Some of it could be because my first was so long ago and these are fairly new techniques. I’m definitely going to talk to my doctor to see if they offer these options!!

newmamakt

Thanks for the explanation ladies! Gives me something to think about. I honestly wouldn’t have thought about healing time. 

BigBadWolf12

I hadn't heard of a gentle c section either.  It sounds like what I had with my breech boy though,  minus the clear shield so I could watch (which I would have liked... they didn't even really want dh looking over the barrier bc they said too many people pass out our get squeamish but other than that,  I was not knocked out,  had free arm movement,  held DS immediately,  they didn't cut the cord right away, the nurses offered to take pictures for us, etc.

denma2015

STM here.  For my first birth we took a course called “Birthing from Within”.  It was invaluable.  Although it leaned toward natural birth it also taught you and your partner how to deal with the unexpected during a birth.  I was not against an epidural going in but I knew I wanted to see what my body could do.  Most important to me was vaginal birth, skin to skin, breast crawl.  Fast forward to my first birth.... my water broke right on 37 weeks.  It was about 3 hours after I completed a 12 hour shift at the hospital.  I went into labor exhausted.  Not to mention I wasn’t really in labor. I was 1cm and baby was practically in the north pole.  I walked for hours trying to get into a good labor pattern.  After 12 hours I hadn’t progressed so we started pitocin which is evil but effective medicine.  After 21 hours of drug free labor I was exhausted.  I had been awake and moving for over 30 hours at that point and only 4cm.  The pain was intense and I feared if I kept going I wouldn’t have the energy to actually push the baby out.  My class helped me realize this and my husband was able to help me make the decision to get the epidural.  An hour after getting it placed I was complete!  I called it the relaxadural.  I pushed for about 90 minutes and baby came out perfect 25 hours after my water broke.  Those first few hours were magical.  The hospital was totally hands off and we were never separated.  We didn’t even bathe him until 2 hours before going home.  

For this birth I plan to go in with the same mindset.  I have no idea what is going to happen but my hope is I get the same freedom to make choices about myself and my baby throughout labor.  I want to try nitrous oxide this time for pain relief.  My doctor is also a close personal friend so I know I am I amazing hands and she will support all of my wishes.  Oh and I hope to never experience pitocin again!  

peachy0709

Mine is the same as @sourlemon and @thirdtimesacharm2019

My doctor is pro gentle C when possible (my best friend got to do a lot of skin to skin after hers), but DD2 had labored breathing (I think?? I honestly was too busy throwing up) so DH went and watch her in the nursery. 

Allycat11

TTM and have always had a pretty lax birth plan. Here are my main points:
-bring on the epidural. I pushed out 1 baby with an epidural and 1 without (it either wore off or was turned off with the 2+ hours of pushing DD) I have no desire to push without one again. 
-DH announces gender
-Delayed cord clamping
-Immediate skin to skin
-Breastfeeding as soon as we can and then on demand
-No pacifiers in the hospital
-Baby will not leave the room or be out of sight from me or DH unless an absolute emergency where DH can not follow
-All guests during labor must be approved before coming in the room and MIL is not welcome until I am cleaned up after delivery. 

I am preparing for the possibility of a quick intense labor with water breaking at home. DD was a long-ish labor, water broke at home but contractions stopped after. We took our time getting to the hospital, showered, went out to lunch, etc.... With DS my water broke at 2:30 a.m. with contractions immediately 2 minutes apart, nausea, vomitting. Arrived at the hospital at 3:30ish, epidural by 5:30ish, baby here at 7:37 with only a few pushes. 

I also am preparing for the possibility of an emergency c-section. DD had shoulder dystocia at birth, which means her head delivered with shoulders stuck in the birth canal. Thankfully they got her out safely with no long term consequences, but that is not always the case. If it looks like this one is taking a long time to descend and is not moving down very well, I may opt for a c-section. But I am praying it goes as smoothly as my delivery with DS. 

mrosek91

I don't plan on having a plan. I wrote one for DS#1 because everyone told me I should, and we ended up forgetting it at home. My DH and my doula both know what is important to me, which is to try and have a med-free labor, but play it by ear.
We did write no circumcision on the birth plan because we planned a private ceremony for a few day later, and so we were told we should. It ended up being totally unnecessary, they asked us if we wanted one, we said no, and that was the end of it. 

brianalee2984

I only have a couple of specifics in my birth plan, I am kind of a control freak so I know if I created something in depth and it couldn't go as planned I might get a little frustrated (obviously anything to get the baby out safely is fine). 

-Absolutely nobody in the room during labor aside from the Father and Doctors/Nurses. This is a HUGE one for me because my Mother has threatened to come in despite our wishes (which I know wouldn't be allowed if we didnt allow it, but it's been a frustrating battle)

-Delayed cord clamping/cutting

-If my boyfriend does pass out, as he tends to get queasy pretty easily, my best friend will be the one to step in in his place

-As much peace and quiet as possible

I am hoping that at least these few things go as planned! 

cato99

I don't have anything too far off from what people have said here for my plan either! I live in a crunchy college town so my hospital is already on the low end of intervention--like, I know I won't be pushed into an unnecessary c-section just because the doctor wants to make his racquetball match with his buddy Winthorpe; they offer tubs in some of their rooms, do perineal massage with oil during the birth, let me tear naturally, skin to skin, promote breastfeeding, pride themselves and advertise their low c-section rate, etc. My last birth was really well managed even though it had a bunch of complications so I have high trust going in for the second one. 

I do have some preferences that I'll go over again with my family/husband in case I need help self-advocating, but I don't think I will prepare anything written out. I'm very lucky that (entirely by coincidence) my personal "birth team" in the room includes a doctor (my mom), a lawyer (my sister), and an insurance specialist with deep knowledge of medical malpractice (husband) so I know they'll help fight anything weird that may happen! (Honestly if I have one birth plan item I could present to the actual baby, or to fate or the universe or the deities above, it would be to come on time so that it lines up with my mom's, sister's, and husband's travel schedules so that they're there with me!). Those preferences (other than, again, all the stuff the hospital already does like skin-to-skin etc) include:

-labor at home as long as possible with my medicine ball and yoga poses, and in the soaking tub (I labored at home for 20 hours last time but the dr advised me that second births can progress a lot faster, so not to delay too much!). This part was really hard on my mom last time because she wanted me safely in the hospital like the second I had the first contraction lol
-I'm open to any and all pain medication depending on how things are going
-frequent blood pressure and blood sugar monitoring bc I've had issues with that in the past
-obviously avoid c section if possible
-if pitocin becomes necessary, then I want an epidural before the pitocin drip kicks in. Hard no on pitocin contractions!
-listen to anything a nurse has to say because last time they were the ones actually paying close attention to my baby's distress level and the urgency to start pushing, while the doctor on duty was like "yeah maybe in a couple of hours" 
-they are free to do a full check-up/bath/vaccines on baby as soon as they deem appropriate, given that last time there were some little hiccups like low blood sugar and jaundice right off the bat
-no circumcision

sourlemon

@cato99 if I wasnt having a C section, I'd totally be with you on the no pitocin contractions! With my failed induction with DD1, I was on pitocin for 36 hours before my doctor allowed an epidural. I had stacking contractions that were off the chart for 20 of those hours. No wonder sh*t hit the fan a few hours later. I hate her (the doctor).

wabash15

@chillycanadian this may be TMI but I had 24 hours of diarrhea prior to my water leaking and pretty much cleaned myself out so no pooping during labor (36+hours). also the pain post wasn't horrible. I was sore but less sore than a c-section (if a section is necessary my biggest advice is to stay on top of the pain meds and move as soon as your allowed). 

I know labor often goes its own way and not as planned... so I'm open.
   I would like low intervention/hopefully med free but like @denma2015 I had a long labor after a day of work and needed the epidural to rest/relax enough to fully dilate. 
   just husband and doula and any relevant medical folks in the room (I'm fine with students, they have to learn). 
   low lighting, music, laboring in the tub, ability to move around
I hope to labor as long as possible at home this time, walking to hospital
DH to announce the sex, skin to skin, delayed cord clamping, nursing, no paci.
  But please vaccinate the snot out of my kid

goldfishcraker

@wabash15 thank you! I'll take a bit of monkey butt before heading to the hospital to avoid the delivery poop! Haga

cato99

@sourlemon wow I hate her too (your doctor)!! 

purplg8r

@BigBadWolf12 good to know you had all those things with a regular c-section.  But the clear sheet is one of the major points to me. I am one of those people that has to see everything that’s going on. When I was little I used to have to have surgery on my toenails frequently and I would cry and scream because they would try to make me lay down and as soon as they let me sit up to watch, I would be fine. To this day I have to watch needles going in for shots and for blood draws. So to have that cover in front my face and not be able to see what’s going on would freak me out even more I think. 

heml

@purplg8r I’m the exact same way. It makes me feel more in control to watch the needles, so I will be asking my dr closer to time if a clear sheet for a potential C section is an option 

law_and_little1

Anyone else delivering at a hospital with a "no pictures or videos during delivery" policy? I'm not saying I for sure WANT pictures or videos, but I feel like it should be my choice -- and the lawyer in me just thinks the policy is only there to protect themselves if they do something wrong! 

heml

@law_and_little1 My hospital has a no photos or videos during delivery policy too “due to the unpredictability of events that may require a rapid response.” My lawyer brain also went straight to “y’all just don’t want any documentation if there are mistakes.”

lovelikestardust

@law_and_little1 @heml Hahaha as soon as I read that question my lawyer brain also immediately responded with, "what, so there's no evidence in case something goes wrong?" 

Avrilmai

Oh my @purplg8r and @heml I am the exact opposite. I don’t want watch. I turn my head for blood draws and shots. I’d probably be the one to pass out if I had to watch a c/s. My sister actually wanted me in the room for her 2nd and I said no bc i knew I couldn’t handle it. DH on the other hand is fine with all of that stuff. 

I honestly haven’t given an official birth plan much thought yet. I had to sign consent forms and talked with my doc about no episiotomy at the beginning of pregnancy.  She will give me a formal “birth plan” document to work on with DH once I’m 28 weeks or so. 
My main thoughts at this point are just DH in the room (aside from medical professionals), NO mom NO MIL. They both create a lot of anxiety. I’d like for the care team to talk to me about what they’re doing and why (as long as there is time). My hospital supports breast feeding and does skin to skin and delayed cord clamping as a routine practice so as long as baby is safe and healthy I’d like to do that. Baby will get vaccinated. My OB and I have already discussed family history of emergent c/s and will continue to have that discussion. 
Love reading this thread it’s giving me a lot to consider. I hadn’t even thought about DH announcing the sex. That would be a special moment for him. 

janele3214

Ok so question for y’all. Is anybody planing on doing cord blood banking? Or have previously done it? 

WinchesterGirl

I had a detailed but brief 1 page plan for DS1. I will likely update it to include that we are trying for a VBAC, but otherwise remain unchanged this time. My OB/Midwife practice does everything I want standard, and we will have our same doula, so really it is for the nurses who do not know you when you arrive. 

Essentially it is:
- Baby and mom safety is #1, but please discuss things with us if needed so we stay informed unless it is emergent.
-Do not at any time offer pain medication, unless in case of CS. 
- Delayed cord clamp, immediate skin to skin, etc. 
- prefer not to be attached to IV pole, or constant monitoring. I don't know that I'll have a choice on that for VBAC reasons, but it was nice last time to move freely and walk the halls, stretch, squat, etc.
- Prefer to tear over episiotomy except to preserve clitoral function.