Why our board is dead... — The Bump
June 2019 Moms

Why our board is dead...

Thoughts/feedback on this?

I’m super bummed that our June board is so dead/slow on activity. I feel cheated that we don’t have more community and I’m kinda pissed at the ladies that peaced out and started their own group a while back. 

Are there enough of us still here to salvage this?? Or should I keep creeping on July’s board?? 

I wanna boooooond with you June mommas!!

(I initially started this as an UO post but I feel like it’s a big enough topic for a separate thread.)


Re: Why our board is dead...

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  • I don’t understand why anyone would be mean to one another. This is supposed to be a community forum to get advice, share and get to know people. I came here sort of late so I haven’t experienced any negativity. This is my first child and I was looking for a support group because I am not sure what to expect. 
  • @holyboobsbatman I have to agree with you.

    The vitriol I saw sort of inhibited me from posting for quite a while, then when I finally started the board had died.

    It’s a shame that so many people were scared off by ladies that left soon afterward anyway - that makes me sad.

    I have loved the energy and vibes I’ve seen since then - no need to pounce on people who don’t post perfectly! It just saddens me that we’re so slow and so few people post. 

    I know there is still time and I do hope we (as a board) are able to form a strong and welcoming community as we get closer to baby’s due date. I just miss getting on here and seeing more posts. 

    Thanks for your thoughts, ladies. And - even if we’re slower - I think we’ve got some pretty wonderful energy going since the mass exodus. <3
  • I frankly gave up after the admins got involved...that and I hardly anybody wanna respond to u/o Thursday 🤣.

    I'm glad it worked out for those who stuck around

    Happy and healthy 9 months to y'all!
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  • I’m due May 28th but agree with what is being said about why the boards are dead. For me ;some of the rudeness has put me off from posting much. Currently having complications with my little one.. they think he might have half a heart and I’m waiting to be referred to an advanced hospital for a more detailed ultrasound but I wish I could find an active group with other high risk I’m not sure what to expect and was sad to see the boards die. Wishing all the other moms a healthy pregnancy ❤️
  • I have been pretty quiet as well but I was nervous to jump in before. It was strange seeing how cruel people were being when ladies were coming here for a community and advice. I wanted to get more involved but was afraid to post something incorrectly. I hope we can all come together for these last 4-5 months and build a community!
  • Well it seems that there are still plenty of us here that have absolutely no interest in the mean girl style boards of yesterday - and every interest in making meaningful and kind connections with the ladies that remain. 
    Let’s keep doing that <3
    @knicolea25 I’m really sorry that you’re dealing with that - I pray they’re wrong about that little heart, and if they’re right I will be praying even harder!
    Just yesterday I was told a story about a little girl who had the exact same thing - and though she had quite a few surgeries very young, she’s now healthy and happy.
    People are sharing these stories with me because I’m now high risk too - my AS showed a 2 valve umbilical cord and now I have to wait weeks for another scan.
    It’s really hard to feel the same excitement when I know something is wrong. 
    Please let me know if you find a more solid support group - and in the meantime I hope we can all be there for each other.

  • I'm high risk too. So I get it. One day at a time momma.
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  • I feel out of it, i didn't realize a people left and started their own group. If that's what they want, so let it be. I'm hoping when the group migrates to Facebook more people are involved. I'm really close with my August BMB, and I noticed once we moved to Facebook, it got better and more personable. 
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  • @ballofmeat
    I never said those who left should "only lurk" in fact what I said was "I welcome EVERYONE to continue to look/lurk, post and support, (even if you are part of other groups!) but if you've chosen to take the majority of your support somewhere else then I feel you must step away from correcting or directing others about how to post and leave that to those who use this as their primary group." 

    To me this means that if someone were to put a one-off post on the board it doesn't make sense for those who have left to get upset about this and direct people to the introduction and rules posts if those who are here don't have a problem with a few one-off posts every now and then. To clarify, I don't know that this has happened as of yet.

    Your post now is actually a perfect example of getting snarky when there is no need to be. I was nothing but supportive of those who left in my original post.
    Your desire to initiate drama is not appreciated. 
  • @ballofmeat
    I don't disagree that the use of "Mean Girls" was a form of name-calling that while might have been how the OP felt wasn't perhaps the best way to go about expressing this and as you say "poked the bear". 

    I also think your comment to me directly was an attempt at additional drama. Perhaps the use of the term "start" was inaccurate in placing initiation of drama at your feet. For that I will retract.

    I'm also not "offended" that you came back to respond. It appears to me that you are offended that people felt your actions were mean. That's on you. 
  • @gta4334 it is just slightly confusing that after we left no one from our group has been here dictating the board organization. Your comment of divesting ourselves seemed unnecessary. More than a few of us lurk this board to add our support or advice when it pertains but we have not stepped on toes or tried to mess with the current flow. 

    For all intents and purposes this board is your guys’ and has been. If you want to fault us for responding when we got called out, don’t call us out. I know I will support and offer advice when I can. There are still a few ladies here I like and lurk on when they post as well as adding my experience to a post that I can relate to. 
  • @Dcwtada
    apologies if my comment wasn't necessary. 
  • Yep, I never got into posting here much because of some of the issues raised. Nothing wrong with leaving this board to start a different one. Nothing wrong with lurking here, either. But I don’t think it’s right to pretty much check out, but then pop back in just to police others and enforce/justify rules. That’s basically ensuring that if the board won’t operate the way you want it to, it will simply stay dead. I guess we’ll see what happens the next time there’s an “errant” post...
  • Glad to hear that - guess we’ll see what happens. This thread leads me to believe it’s going to be an issue. 
  • Everyone is entitled to their feelings. whether they feel like others were being "mean girls", or if they feel they weren't getting the right support. Nothing wrong with starting a separate group. My one question is, what defines "support", I feel there were some people here who did show support, probably not daily posters, but were involved, and aren't part of this "new group".

    Regardless, for those who want to continue a support group here, we need to step up and revive the group. If others want to come back, that would be great, if not, then best of luck to them.
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