May 2019 Moms

STM+ Check In

How many kids do you already have? Ages? 

How are your other kids doing this week? 

Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?

GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?

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Re: STM+ Check In

  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? 1 ds, 2 at the end of the month

    How are your other kids doing this week? Good, he seems to be going through a developmental leap, sleep has been a little bit rough lately. This happened last year around this time too, so hopefully it’s something that only lasts a little while 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? Just working on planning his birthday party, I cannot believe he’s already going to be two. It’s crazy!

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time? I was 41 weeks, it was the morning I was supposed to be induced but as I was getting ready to head to the hospital for my induction labor started and it was fast and furious. Total time from first contraction to baby was about 2 hours and 45 minutes. Vaginal delivery, no meds. I am hoping for something similar this time, it was a little scary how fast it went but from the sounds of it that’s probably preferred to a really long labor. At least we made it to the hospital, I’m afraid this time I’ll be having a baby at home or in the car. I’m also afraid of having a much longer labor. So I think I’ll just be hoping for an exact repeat!
  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? One, 5

    How are your other kids doing this week? 
    He's doing well. We're still working on learning to read and I'm just so happy with how quickly he's learning and how much he's enjoying it. 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? None, really. Well. I do have a question, but I guess it's unanswerable. Do you ever wonder how much of your child's personality is your responsibility and how much is just their nature? My mother always took credit for my being good natured and kind and whatnot, but looking back I just feel like that was my personality. Maybe she fostered some values that helped, but I don't know. My son is so sweet and caring and I wonder how much is it me doing the right thing, and how much is just his innate personality. Maybe that's a super silly question lol, but opinions might be interesting. 

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?

    I was 40w5d. I was not induced, was schedule for that Tuesday, went into labor on Saturday. Vaginal birth with epidural. I really hope to go natural this time. I would like it to go about the same it did, but without meds. 
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  • mrsdee15mrsdee15 member
    edited January 2019
    How many kids do you already have? Ages? DD is 15 months.

    How are your other kids doing this week? Good!! She's walking all around everywhere, and now it seems like she's trying out new sounds.  Our pedi said that they kind of trade off learning motor and verbal skills, so I'm wondering if she's about to have a big verbal development phase.  

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?  She is in a food-throwing phase and that is less than fun, but last night she was pointing and talking to my belly, so that was freaking adorable.

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?  My water broke at 36 weeks (weirdly, I had been in L&D the day before for low movement - later I learned that can be a sign of impending labor).  I woke up DH and said my water broke, he asked if I was sure.  I also texted my best friend (she was in a time zone 2 hours ahead), and she also asked if I was sure.  Yes, yes I was sure.  DD was breech, so my water broke at 4:21 am, we got to the hospital at about 5:30 or 6, and my OR time was 7 for a c-section (right after a shift change, which was nice to be first rather than the last of the shift).  She went into distress when they did the spinal block so it became an emergency, and was incredibly fast.  Like, the sheet went up and I thought they were going to tell me they were going to start, and they told me she was coming out.  It was maybe a minute.  They didn't tell me about the distress until after, they were checking her and stitching me up, and I made the comment that it seemed really fast.  No one responded.  "HEY, THAT SEEMED REALLY FAST." "Oh... yeah, she was in distress."  Oh.  I was bruised, swollen, and in a lot of pain in the weeks following, so this time around I am hoping for a VBAC.  This little guy kicks up a lot, so I hope he will be in the right position.  My OB/doctor's office is very supportive of VBACs.

    ETA: @eatinwatermelonseeds Oooh that IS a tough question!  I guess my thought is that the innate personality traits can be enhanced by nurture, if that makes sense.  But I do believe that's two different sets of traits also, and personality draws from both.  
    DD born PPROM preemie at 36 weeks on 10/1/17 after over a year TI, 
    then 3 failed IUIs, and finally a successful IVF FET.

    Due with #2 5/2/19 after HIO once in my FW,
    because apparently that's how life works now. Team Blue!
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  • How many kids do you already have? Ages?  I have one DD who will be 4 next month

    How are your other kids doing this week? So far, this week is going well for her.

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? Nothing particular. I still feel waves of nausea throughout the day. It is getting OLD fast.

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?-

    I was 41w1d with DD. I was induced and it failed. I was a c-section. I went pain med-free for most of the induction but then got an epidural towards the end when it seemed inevitable that I may be going in for a c-section.

    I am going to attempt a TOLAC if I got into natural labor prior to 39 weeks. I will not do any type of interventions. I will schedule my RCS somewhere in the 39th week. As of today, the baby is breech though (I know that can change) but if she stayed breech, then we will head to the OR and not even attempt a VBAC.
    DD1- Feb 2015
    DD2- EDD 5/12/2019
  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? 
    2 girls, 6 & 8

    How are your other kids doing this week?  Pretty good. They went back to school yesterday. DD1 starts rehearsals tonight for the musical she is in. So I am chauffeur and we won’t get back till late. 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? None 

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?

    For both, I was around 38 weeks when my water broke, both med free vaginal births, my second was 3.5 hours. Hoping for something similar this time around and no complications. 
    Ivy: July 2010  |  Stella: Dec 2012  |  BFP#3: MMC at 11Wk's, July 2017 | Wyatt: April 2019 | BFP#5: Twin Girls due Sept 2020

  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? Almost 14 mo DS

    How are your other kids doing this week? Becoming more and more like a toddler. Refusing food, throwing food, etc

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time? I was 38+5, I had a membrane sweep that morning and went into labor kind of immediately but so early that I was able to finish out the work day. I didn't even start timing until later that night and we didn't go to the hospital until close to midnight. H was out with friends and I didn't want to make him come home if the contractions stopped and I had wanted to labor at home a bit anyway. I had an emergency c-section. I tried for a med free vaginal birth, but didn't make it very far. After about 10 hours of med free I asked for something to take the edge off, got a narcotic, and slept for an hour until it wore off. I continued to labor med free for another 10 hours until I got pitocin (I was 10 cm dilated but contractions too far apart). After pitocin I asked (screamed) for an epidural. After 24 hours of labor I started pushing, pushed for four, he was sunny side up and wouldn't come out, so the c-section call was made. I'm attempting a med free VBAC this time but going into it with no expectations. If pitocin comes into play at all, I'm getting an epidural BEFORE pitocin. I'm also embracing that it's highly likely I'll have a RCS. Overall, I think it will be a better experience for me being more prepared about the reality of a c-section. I knew it was possible the first time around but I didn't think it would happen to *me*


  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? 
    1 ds, 17 months 

    How are your other kids doing this week? 
    He’s great! Finally over his cold and starting to talk! He loves to scream MELMO (elmo).  And he’s starting to boss our dog River around: “riva! Up!” It’s so cute. 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?
    Heading to perinatal specialist Monday about echogenic bowels, feeling scared but better bc I can’t do anything about it anyway. 

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?  40 weeks, 6 days...was going to be induced next day.  Started contracting and bleeding!! Which freaked me out, so I called the poor doctor on call at midnight.  I went in to hospital around lunch, and labored for several hours before asking for epidural.  Always planned on medication.  I also used laughing gas, but that didn’t do much.  Epidural was great and let me sleep overnight(which was great bc baby didn’t sleep in hospital like you hear about, ugh).  However, the epidural did not help with pushing, which was surprising.  DS was 9.5 pounds and I pushed for three hours.  It hurt a lot and I wasn’t really with it.  I’m hoping DD will be a little smaller so that pushing won’t hurt as much. We will see! But I did love that epidural. 
  • Hi! I haven’t checked in here in forever. Sorry!

    How many kids do you already have? Ages? 
    DD is 2

    How are your other kids doing this week? She’s been refusing naps. I’m terrified this is the end of naps for us. She’s almost 26 months. Today was the fourth day in a row of nap refusal. This is horrible. 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? What do you even do with your kid when they stop napping? I need that measley hour to watch TV and eat junk food. 

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?

    Let’s see. I think I had a pretty textbook progression of things. I was like 0.5 cm and 10% effaced at my 39 week appt. Lost mucus plug at 39+3, went into labor 39+4, DD was born in the morning 39+5. I had heinous back labor and didn’t even notice any pain in my belly because back labor was so bad. My contractions never got regular. Right up until my water broke they were like 7 min, 12 min, 4 min, 5 min, 8 min. Just all over the place. I didn’t believe I was in actual labor because that stuff didn’t go how I was told it would, so it was kind of shocked when my water broke. I went straight into transition and had unbearable pain with every contraction and had uncontrollable shaking for the duration of each contraction. I HAD to get the epidural just to be able to rest a bit. And I really wanted to stop shaking. DD’s head circumference is and has been 99%ile since birth. Needless to say she was stuck for 2.5 hours of pushing and I had to have an episiotomy. I am hoping her giant head paved the way and this kid will slide out in like 2 pushes 😂
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  • @poshspice yup, that's about the time mine stopped napping. My friend's 5 year old still naps. I'm like wtf did I do wrong? 😂 But I don't remember what I did with him. Shortly after that, he was diagnosed with autism and I started school so our schedules got crazy anyway. Once he started preschool he did afternoon classes so he didn't disrupt naptime at daycare. 
  • @eatinwatermelonseeds I remember not napping in preschool. They made me just lie on my mat quietly while everyone else napped. It was the worst. In kindergarten I was allowed to look at books during nap time. My mom can't remember if I quit napping at 2 or 2.5, so I wouldn't be surprised if this is the end for us.  :(
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  • @poshspice ah that’s so early! Is she getting more than 12 hours of nighttime sleep? Or is her nap too early in the day and she’s not tired yet?  I’ve heard of parents still enforcing quiet time in the room instead of nap so you can still have tv time!
  • @poshspice my ds is turning 2 the end of this month and has been hardcore fighting us at nap time too. He’s obviously tired and will sleep if we go for a drive or a walk in the stroller, so I’m hoping it’s just a phase. Hopefully yours starts napping again soon!
  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? DD is almost 17 months

    How are your other kids doing this week? Good. We're working on getting her to sleep through the night again which is actually going pretty well.

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? Favorite brand of toddler shoes? DD has worn daycare's shoes once or twice when hers got wet while playing, and she can absolutely undo Velcro so I'm having a hard time finding shoes she won't take off.

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?
    39+6, nit induced, epidural with a vaginal delivery. Thinking I'll go with the epidural again and hoping for vaginal.

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  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? DS1 will be 7 on the 24th
    DS2 will be 3 in March

    How are your other kids doing this week? DS1 went back to school this week and is doing so much better lately. He had an incident at school a few months ago where he lost his temper and broke the counselor's snow globe. This was about a week after my ex forced his way into the house and began cussing out me and my mom in front of the kids.

    DS2 is working on potty training and going through a super whiney stage.

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? Bad week. Dead car battery, both kids have Dr appts Thursday, I have court on Friday, lots of contractions and headaches in spite of me drinking enough water, and an unwanted birthday. I sadly have no raves

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?
    Due to gestational hypertension, I was induced with both boys. DS1 was at 37+5 and DS2 was at 37 weeks after three months of bed rest. Pitocin and an epidural. My doctor already told me they won't let me go past 38 weeks but probably not even beyond 37. So my May baby will most likely be an April baby just like my February baby became a January baby and my April baby became a March baby.
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  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? 2 boys qges 3 and 6

    How are your other kids doing this week? Both doing good, getting back into the swing of things after a fin vacation.

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? Why do my children hate water on their faces? Makes bath and swim lessons difficult lol.

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time? DS1 I was 41+2 and I was induced. The pitocin did not really work with my body and I spent quite awhile with nothing happening. Ended up with a c section bc they broke my water and then I didn't progress quickly enough. DS2 I had a scheduled c-section at 39 weeks as they deemed failure to progress as a reason I couldn't try for a VBAC. This one will also be a scheduled C-section unless he decides to try to join us before 39 weeks!









  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? 1 DD who is 2 and about 3 months.

    How are your other kids doing this week? Lovely, except for the usual. Refusing to eat dinner. Not listening. Typical two year old stuff.

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? DH bought me a pregnancy pillow and I slept great last night.

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?
    I was 40+4 when I had DD. No induction. I was in early labor at home for 2 days. contractions were close enough to be painful and annoying (10-20 minutes), but not close enough to go to the hospital. Finally went to the hospital, got an epidural that didn't work 100%, labored for 15 (i think) more hours and then had a C-section. Yay. This time I will have a scheduled C-section because I have a medical condition that precludes vaginal birth. Not ideal, but I've heard the recovery is so much better for a RCS as opposed to an emergency CS.
    Me: 36 & DH: 40
    Married: November 2015
    DD 10/19/2016
    BFP:  8/20/2018 - EDD 5/4/2019
  • @eatinwatermelonseeds DD is super outgoing a lot of the time which is not DH or me at all. Although I did take her to story time last Wednesday when daycare was still closed and it was an all ages one - she was pretty shy there (she's 17 months anyways so not like she can go strike up a conversation with a 5 year old but still). There's a lot that seems very "her" to me and not my influence but I think what you're talking about is more applicable as kids get older. I've read it's about 50/50 nature vs nurture with regards to intelligence/school success (which are obviously different). I wonder if this would be similar. I've also heard once you have the second kid you realize that the things you thought were your influence that your second kid then lacks might just be nature in your first kid. I mentioned a dumbed down version of this to the pediatrician and she said "well you change after having your first - you're different so they'll be different" which I also thought was an interesting perspective.

    I've loved reading about everyone's births. It's amazing how pretty much all of them are different. @robyn2201 do you mind me asking how long your first labor was? I'm so curious what to expect since I labored for almost 24 hours (although only 8 at the hospital including an hour and a half of pushing). 3.5 hours just seems so short!

    @heathergirl89 sorry about the dead car battery! I saw somewhere else that you're turning 30. I'm turning 30 in March and not upset about it at all but DH is a couple years older and hated turning 30. It might just be because I've always had 2 years less than DH age-wise but it doesn't bother me and 30 is still SO YOUNG!!


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  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? 13 month old DS

    How are your other kids doing this week? So whiney! So much whining! 🤣

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time? I was induced at 40+3 but things happened really quickly. I had a vaginal delivery with an epidural. I would be happy if things went similar this time. 
  • @ibanezstarburst ignore me if this is a sensitive topic but why were you induced at 40+3? Just curious as usually I've heard about people being induced early for pre-e or low fetal movement or not until 41-42 weeks.

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  • @kvh22 I was having high blood pressure (not pre-e though) I think it was just severe anxiety over the impending birth but my OB wasnt comfortable with it. DS was also measuring quite large do she decided she was most comfortable with inducing me a bit earlier than 41 weeks (which is when she typically would induce for being overdue). He ended up being 9lbs 13 oz so I'm a thankful we didnt wait any longer!
  • @poshspice both of my girls quit napping shortly after their second birthday.  With DD1 it SUCKED!  DD2 was still a newborn, I can't remember exactly how old either of them were but DD1 would have been 25-26ish months and DD2 1-2 months old.  All I wanted was an hour or two to nap myself if at all possible and it just wasn't in the cards.  What I ended up doing was cutting out any TV for her during the rest of the day and allowing her to have some TV time during a set "quiet" time right after lunch.  I couldn't nap, but at least I could nurse DD2 in peace, sometimes get her down for a sleep and knock off a couple chores (laundry, dinner prep, etc) while DD1 was relaxing.  
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  • @eatinwatermelonseeds I think if you've got a kind, empathetic kid you can at least take some of the credit. Even if the traits are innate, they can certainly be suppressed in a negative environment. So you're doing something right!

    @poshspice My oldest stopped napping at about 2.5, which coincided with me quitting my job and also having an infant to take care of, so it was not cool. IIRC, my pediatrician actually said it was pretty normal for certain kids to quit napping at this age. I was expecting her to tell me I needed to keep up the fight, but she actually said if I'm fighting him to take them on a daily basis, it's probably just better to go with his flow. I feel like he was still tired during the day for a few months after he gave up napping, but that was it. He sleeps about 11 hours at night and never naps unless he's bored during a long car ride. DS2 is 2.5 and still likes to take a 2-3 hour nap, so there's hope for your second. I don't know how bad you're fighting putting your LO to sleep, but at least for me it was better letting it go than fighting for hours every day. As he got older, he got better at independent play and the missed naptime didn't impact me that much.

    How many kids do you already have? Ages? Two boys, almost 5 and 2.5

    How are your other kids doing this week? We're all jet-lagged from our trip to Scotland and fighting a nasty cold. 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? I think I used up all my ranting in my group check-in. I'm just hoping for some laid-back, stress-free weeks ahead, but (like @aels12) I also have a birthday party to plan; DS1 turns 5 on Feb 1.

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time? With DS1 I was 40+5. I had days of false labor, and was admitted then discharged once before coming back for the real deal. It was not induced, vaginal, and I had an epidural (actually 2 because I could still feel contractions after the first). They had to do vac-assist because they were losing the reading on his heartbeat and I had a third-degree partial tear. With DS2 I was 40+3. 2 hours from first contraction to his birth. Vaginal and unmedicated because I was too far along when I got to the hospital. I did not go med-free by choice, but when it was over I felt amazing and, if I could choose, "fast and med-free" like DS2 would be my preference. Of course, this also means I'm terrified of having a car baby. The doctor I saw last week (not my regular OB) said I could induce at 39w to avoid giving birth outside the hospital because of my previous fast birth and history of dilating/effacing really early. But I honestly don't want to induce; I feel like my kids always come out when they're ready and it will be harder for me to have the birth I want with an induction. So, I will probably end up with a car baby.
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  • @kvh22 that's a very interesting take on it from your doctor. Thank you for sharing. 

    The nature vs nurture debate has always been such an interesting one to me. As a kid, I was bullied. I was beaten up, I was teased. I remember my mother encouraging me CONSTANTLY to fight back, to hit them. I would always cry and tell her I didn't want to hurt them. Here I am a grown adult, I've hit one person (he fucking deserved it, I promise), and I still have that "I don't want to hurt anyone" mentality. But she tried hard to get me to, and the bullying didn't let up with my philosophy in place. But it's interesting to wonder if I'd been just slightly different in my way of thinking, if my mother encouraging me to hit people would've turned into me becoming incredibly violent and using that to solve all my problems. 
  • @misskimsue We can bond about our car babies in a few months 😂
  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? 2 girls, 5 & 3

    How are your other kids doing this week? Back to routine this week.  It's been good, except DD1 is really struggling to catch up on sleep after a very busy Christmas holidays.  Bedtimes have been hell and I'm just praying that each night gets her a bit closer to being caught up and back to normal.

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions?

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?  I was induced with DD1 a 41w2d.  My cervix was still hard and closed so my doctor started with Cervidil to soften it.  I had it inserted at 9 am, they monitored me for about an hour and then she sent me home.  According to the monitors I was having some mild contractions but I was feeling fine and didn't even notice them so DH and I got busy in the yard working on some flower beds.  About an hour after being home (so 11ish) I went to use the bathroom and the cervidil tampon thing fell out.  I called the hospital to find out what I was supposed to do but the doctor said that since I was due to come back in to be checked in a few hours that I shouldn't worry and they'd just re-insert a new one if necessary at that time.  When I went back that afternoon she was happy with my progress (cervix had softened and dilated 1 cm) that she told me she was ok letting me continue to progress on my own without intervention and that I would just come back the next day if still no baby.  Contractions increased a bit throughout the day, but nothing too crazy.  DH went to his baseball game and when he came home my contractions had gotten a bit more intense.  By 11:30pm I felt like they were just right on top of the other and I was seriously contemplating meds to help me relax.  Epidural wasn't an option when we arrived at the hospital (small, rural hospital and our town only had one anesthetist at the time.  When he wasn't actually "on call" he was only on-call for true emergency situations, which was not me at that time) so I just powered through.  I stood in the shower with the water pounding my back for hours.  I ended up pushing for 1.5 hours.  Her head was stuck and they had to use the vacuum to help her out.  She was finally born at 7:45am. I needed quite a few stitches afterwards and I swear that was the worst part.  The local anesthesia didn't seem to do anything at all and I was flinching and twitching and shaking so much I didn't feel like I could even hold her, so DH just paced around the room rocking DD while the doctor finished sewing up my nether regions.
    With DD2, I had requested to push the induction for convenience sake.  I didn't really want to be induced anyways but wasn't going to argue once we past that same threshold as DD1 either.  But DH had some work stuff going on that was going to make the Dr's original plan of 41w1d super inconvenient so we were waiting until after that weekend to see what happened.  I went into labour on my own at 41w2d, again worked in the garden  most of the day (beauty of June babies) and then "locked" myself upstairs in the master bedroom/bath in the evening once it started to get more intense.  I stood in the shower, rocked on my exercise ball, went back to the shower and spent a lot of time leaning over my bed.  Finally decided we should go in to the hospital around 11pm.  By the time we got organized and drove there, we arrived around 11:30-11:45ish, checked in and I went straight into the shower.  Came out briefly to be examined.  My doctor noted that while I had nearly progressed to 10cm, there was still a lip in my cervix and she hoped waiting to push would cause it to move up and out of the way (I recall her noting this same issue with DD1 but we didn't wait, I now think that her experience over those 2 years helped with her decision to have me wait to push and possibly made the delivery so much easier).  She left, I went back into the shower and not more than 25 min later I was moaning so intensely that the nurse could hear me from her station and came running in asking if I absolutely needed to push.  I wouldn’t have been able to get on the bed (in a traditional, on-my-back position) had I tried, and in that moment I didn’t want to either.  They quickly switched the bed for me and installed the birthing bar as DH hoisted me up and I pushed in 2 pushes squatting on the bed.  
    Based on my previous two, I am betting this one will also be late but probably just slightly earlier than DD2 was, so induction likely won’t be an issue.  I didn’t have a negative experience with either delivery but I definitely felt my second went better than the first.  I hope this one follows suit.  
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  • @ibanezstarburst got it. That makes sense.

    @mcewen3 I was super interested reading that. No option for an epidural...wow. I never thought about stitching up without it. I had a second degree tear (DD's head was 85th percentile although she was 39+6 so idk how that really works - that'd be smaller than 85th percentile in someone going at 41w+ I assume and only 8lbs which I know isn't small but it's not huge, either). I didn't love the stitching with the amount I could feel. I've been wondering if this next baby will come so fast I don't really have the option for the epidural and what my feelings are about that so I just want to be prepared if that's the case for what would be different.

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  • @kvh22 I was stitched up without an epidural but they applied a local anaesthetic I couldn’t feel anything while they did it. 
  • @aels12 okay great! Now that you say that and I think about it more, I kept wincing and my OB was like "can you feel this?" I said a little so she got some local anesthetic and it was definitely better after. I didn't have a super short labor anyway so I'll probably have enough time to ask for the epidural. My mom asked for one with my sister (which they did NOT give her although she might have been a bit too far along) and she was on baby #3...I don't think I'll be joining the car baby club. Actually, now that I think about it, my mom said she put off going to the hospital with my sister because she hated giving birth so she wasn't there very long. Way to cut off your nose to spite your face, mom. The way she used to tell it they refused to give it to her since she had me without meds and labored with my brother before an emergency c-section with him without meds, but now that she and I have talked about it more, I think it was too late. I was a VBAC birth almost 30 years ago for anyone hoping to do that and looking for success stories. And she did it again with my sister 24 years ago.

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  • StormiewinterStormiewinter member
    edited January 2019
    @poshspice both boys stopped napping around 2. For us that meant an earlier bedtime so I was ok with it. We also do a quiet time in the afternoon with books or a show to have some downtime. 

    How many kids do you already have? Ages? 
    2 boys 6 and almost 3 (February) 

    How are your other kids doing this week? 
    Ds1 is beyond clingy. Super anxious won’t leave our side, won’t leave the room without someone with him. He didn’t poop for 3 days because I refused to sit in the bathroom with him (I offered to turn on lights and check in, just not stand there the whole time). It is becoming a major source of frustration. I’m not sure if this is anxiety related to the pregnancy or just a phase, but I am ready for him to get over it. When ds2 is happy he keeps saying “you the best mama I ever seen” and it seriously melts my heart every time! 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? My house looks like a bomb went off and we still have our tree up. I need to find some additional energy somewhere! 

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time?

    With ds1 I was induced at 36 weeks for severe preeclampsia after a month of bed rest.  I started cervadil that night but also had to be on magnesium sulfate (it was miserable) so I couldn’t leave the bed. They started pitocin the next morning, but his heart rate would drop with every contraction. They stopped for a bit and tried again in the afternoon, but his distress was worse so they decided on a c section. Literally 3:50 they discuss csection and he was born at 4:10pm. It turns out that he had the cord wrapped twice around his neck so that was the cause of distress (so thankful the doctor decided on the c section). I still had to be on the magnesium for 24 hours afterwards so I had to stay in labor and delivery and since ds1 was low birth weight (5 lbs 7 oz) they would bring him to me to feed and then he would go back to the nursery for monitoring. Overall it was a really difficult experience. 

    Ds2, in the other hand, I was scheduled for RCs at 39 weeks (our hospital does not allow vbac). I had a totally normal pregnancy with him and no hypertension. I went into labor at exactly 37 weeks, and contractions went quickly to 2 minutes apart. Went to the hospital and they gave me fluids and labor stopped. 2 days later same thing happened, 9 pm my contractions are a minute and a half apart, dh and I go to hospital, contractions slow down so OB says they will do fluids and send me home, but an hour later contractions were back and I was progressing so ds2 was born by c section at 2:18 am. I would love to have an another uneventful healthy delivery like ds2. I am sure I will be scheduled for RCS around 39 weeks. Since I’ve never made it to 38 weeks I am also in the probably going to be an April baby, but so long as there are no complications and everyone is healthy then I am happy. 
  • @poshspice My kids still took naps when they entered kindergarten. Their school actually has nap time in kinder and sometimes DD2 complains that other kids are noisy and she wasn't able to sleep! We eventually cut them after they started school because weekends were so busy with activities and sports. I would probably just keep trying each day. But 2 is pretty young to cut out all naps. I don't really now what to recommend other than just put her in her bed everyday for a nap. Hopefully this is just a phase and it will work itself out and she will start napping again. Could you suggest a family nap?

    @kvh22 My first was 8.5 hours long. Both mine started with my water breaking and within 30 min I was having contractions every 5 min and very quickly after that less than 3 min. So no gradual build up, just kind of boom I'm in full blown labor. My last was fast and furious but I would really take that over it being longer. 
    Ivy: July 2010  |  Stella: Dec 2012  |  BFP#3: MMC at 11Wk's, July 2017 | Wyatt: April 2019 | BFP#5: Twin Girls due Sept 2020

  • @kvh22 I honestly don't know why the local wasn't working for me, or maybe it was and it was just all the adrenaline and the coming down afterwards that was making me shake.  It was quite intense.  As for the epi, I went into it knowing an epidural was not necessarily going to be available to me.  We had the choice of going to a hospital in another town if we wanted to, several people I knew had done so in the past, but it was about a 45 min drive vs. the 5 min drive we had in town.  My gut always told me I'd prefer being close to home, even if it meant med-free.  Obviously there were protocols in place and had an emergency situation occurred, the anesthetist would have come in for a c-section.  He was a doctor I knew well (was actually our family doctor when I was a kid) and had basically vowed not to retire until our clinic had a better supply of doctors and at least a couple anesthetists on staff.  I never felt I wasn't in good hands, it was just a you-might-have-to-tough-it-out kind of thing that you had to be prepared for if you chose to deliver locally.  Not having the option first time around made me that much more prepared for my second.  I had a better handle on what my body would feel and what I needed to do to help myself through the contractions.  It was SO much easier staying at home nearly the whole time with DD2 and then just getting to the hospital for the actual delivery.  
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  • How many kids do you already have? Ages?  1 DS almost one and a half

    How are your other kids doing this week? He’s been sick. Caught RS virus and had a fever of almost 103, despite which he was still trying to run around and play... 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? Nothing much since we’ve been trying to take it easy this week.

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time? I enjoyed reading everyone’s birthing stories. Everyone is so different, it really blows my mind. Anyway, here’s mine. My water broke at 3 am on 40w3d. My doc had said he wouldn’t let me go over 41w because my amniotic fluid was on the low side, so I was initially relieved. My hospital had me come in for monitoring. However contractions didn’t start and my cervix was still closed so they started me on pitocin in the morning. Long story short, it took a long time and I didn’t get to pushing until late afternoon the next day. Not sure how long I pushed, but baby became distressed so I had to get an episiotomy and vaccuum assistance, which resulted in very bad tearing. From water breaking to time of birth all told was about 38 hours. @kvh22I also didn’t have an epidural but I’m pretty sure they applied a local anesthetic for stitching. Regardless, I did still feel it and it was painful although not unbearable. What really bothered me was how long it took.

    I will be going for a vaginal birth again this time, but am really hoping it goes a little smoother (and faster!). No epidural again, and I really REALLY hope no pitocin. I do not want to be induced! Pitocin made me feel like I was fighting against my own body. Also, tbh, I’m definitely a bit anxious about tearing again because that was a hard recovery. 

    Oh, actually I do have a question. My labor was very similar to my mother’s first labor (followed almost the exact same pattern although she didn’t need the vaccuum). Have other people been similar to their mothers (or sisters, I suppose)? I’m really hoping so, because my mom says her second labor was by far her easiest, haha.

  • @mcewen3 I think if I knew going into it that the epidural wasn't an option it would have been different. I delivered at a very big hospital 5 mins away but they basically only have one (of 2 on staff) at the hospital at any given time. I definitely could have gone longer without the epidural but he was there and ready (around midnight) so I went for it since they couldn't guarantee he'd be back for another 2 hours (going into a surgery). Me and DH got some much needed sleep so it worked out for us. I hindsight I should have napped during the day when it wasn't so bad.

    @kipper-2 My mom went 2 weeks over with my brother and ended up with an emergency c-section because he went into distress after 24 hours of pitocin and she only ever made it to 5cm. I, on the other hand, went into labor naturally 2 days early and had DD 1 day early. Very different labors, but in a good way for me. I think induced vs. not can't really be compared. My mom was 3 days early with me after going 2 weeks over and having NOTHING going on at all with dilation her previous labor so I figure that's a good sign. She also had a VBAC as mentioned above

    My OB made the comment when I came in this time that my pregnancy with DD was easy but my delivery was difficult. Between meconium, the cord being wrapped around her neck, and her getting almost out after 30 mins of pushing and it taking another hour to get her that last little bit (she had a big head and I'm small down there apparently), I'm hoping for "smoother" sailing this time - or maybe just a smaller headed baby. They thought she was going to come out in 45 mins b/c everything was happening so fast and then it just stalled with movement further out. The placenta also just basically shot out right after she did with no pushing on my part - that part was great!

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  • How many kids do you already have? Ages? 1 daughter - 13 months

    How are your other kids doing this week? good! Walking about 80% of the time and making lots of new noises. LAST NIGHT SHE SAID MAMA ON PURPOSE! (So far it's only been dada!). @mrsdee15 i totally agree that it seems like one week we're going strong with verbal skills and then the next week, verbal takes a backseat to physical skills. But I also notice too that the more cool stuff she starts to do, the whinier she can be lol. It's like everything is taking a toll on them. Plus teething, ugh.

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? every night I rock DD to sleep (which I know is a habit I should get rid of soon before baby arrives) but I'm loving it lately because the baby kicks while DD is on my stomach and it's like they're touching. DD is pretty fascinated by my belly and will touch it, or blow it kisses on a few occasions, which is the cutest thing ever. I don't think she knows what's going on but maybe she does?

    GTKY: For your previous delivery(ies), how far along were you, were you induced? vaginal or c-section? pain meds or pain med free? Are you planning/hoping for the same or different this time? (great question btw) I had a vaginal delivery w/ pitocin and an epidural at 39+3. Labor started naturally at 39+1 with contractions that started off pretty irregular but as day went on, got stronger. We went to the hospital that night but I wasn't admitted because I wasn't dilated enough. So that kind of sucked. I had a horrible night of laboring at home and then went back to the hospital the next morning. Thankfully I was a little more dilated and was admitted. Spent day laboring at hospital and then had epidural around 5pm followed by pitocin/them breaking my water. Finally got to sleep a little once the epi kicked in and rested up before pushing in the morning for 2 hours. Overall it wasn't too bad and I'm hoping for a somewhat similar situation for #2 - just hopefully a quicker early labor situation. 
    Me: 33 DH: 34
    Married: Oct 2015
    TTC #1: Sept 2016
    BFP: 10/19/16 ~ blighted ovum ~ D&C 11/23/16
    BFP: 3/24/17   <3  DD1 born 12/2/17
    TTC #2: July 2018
    BFP: 8/26/18 <3  DD2 born 5/16/19



  • @peachy13 how far apart were the contractions? Mine went from 7 mins to 5 mins after a walk so I called the line to figure out if I should go in. My OB was on call and said to wait until they're 5 mins apart for an hour...then my water broke right after that so we went in right away. I was so nervous about getting sent home and was curious about those who've experienced it.

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  • How many kids do you already have? 2 DDs Ages? 6 and 2.5

    How are your other kids doing this week? DD2's sleep schedule is l messed up from winter break. She has been staying up until like 10, even after going to bed at 8... no bueno. 

    Rants/Raves? Concerns/Questions? I was miserable all evening yesterday trying to sleep off a migraine, and it has now continued into today... we're closing in on the 24-hoour mark. Tylenol helps, but nothing has made it actually go away.

    GTKY: With DD1, I was in early labor at home for like 15 hours, got freaked out by the daddy 511 app, so we went in. O was only at like a 4 and they said it was still early labor and were gonna send me home, but something funky happened with DD's heart, so I hung out, got an epidural, and labored in the hospital for like 12 more hours. She was sunny side up, so I had bad back labor, which the epidural helped with. After several more hours, then they said I was fully dilated, but DD1's heartrate was dropping with each contraction, so they said I could try to push, but they didn't want to push for too long, so they took me to the OR and let me try to push for s few contractions, but when nothing really happened, they prepped me for a c-section and sliced and diced me. All in all, noticeable contractions started at 5am on Friday, went to the hospital at 7pmish, and she was born at 1pm on Saturday.

    With DD2, I was in early labor for a few days before, having a ton of mild contractions in the evenings. When the contractions became really real, I stayed home as long as possible until it was basically unbearable, and then went in... thankfully no back labor with #2 or we probably would have gone in much earlier. I was at an 8 and they called for the epidural right away, took a nap at the hospital for like 4 hours, then started pushing. DD2's heart rate was dropping, but the nurse said to try only pushing with every other contraction, and DD tolerated that until she was born! We went in to the hospital around 1am on Thursday, DD2 was born at 6:30 that morning.

    This time, I'm hoping for basically a repeat of DD2's birth, except this time I'm hoping for no tearing for me (and hopefully no fucked up bladder afterward)!
    kids with flags
  • Thanks for all the nap advice and commiseration, everyone!

    @eatinwatermelonseeds I majored in psych in college and I'm convinced personality is heritable and pre-determined for the most part unless people experience great trauma (ala Romanian orphanages, or horrific abuse over many years, etc.). I kind of don't feel like we as parents have much to do with it as long as we're at least average parents. I mean like, maybe my kid says please and thank you while SIL's doesn't, but I don't think that necessarily falls under "personality traits." If you read the book "Selfish Reasons to Have More Kids", the author cites a bunch of studies that support the theory that we don't do much to steer how they turn out. To support this, my BFF's mom is legit a crazy woman (and was finally diagnosed with Bi-Polar disorder when we were in college) and she was a wonderful baby and child and she's so even keeled and well behaved. Not like her mother at all, and way more like her dad. Her parents divorced when she was 2 and only spent winter break and summers with her dad, so I don't think nurture can take the credit on this one. 

    @alexava2017 She's always been on the lowest end of sleep possible for her age group basically since she was born. We've even worked with a sleep consultant for her when it was bad. Right now she's only doing about 11.5 hours in 24 whether she sleeps only over night or also gets a nap. 

    @aels12 I've been dealing with DD fighting nap for about 4 months before she turned 2 (she's almost 26 months). It's been so awful lol. Good luck to you! 

    @mcewen3 Oh man, don't say that! lol. I think I might have to instate some sort of TV or ipad time just to be able to nurse the new one with DD. I just keep putting her in her crib every day and doing her nap routine and hoping she will go back to napping. After 4 straight days of refusals she took a monster (for her) 2 hour nap yesterday, but it's definitely been more days without naps than with. 

    @misskimsue yes, everyone has been telling me to just keep doing the nap routine and maybe she'll grow out of the regression! I don't ever fight with her to go to sleep. We sleep trained, so I just do the nap routine and put her down. If she doesn't go to sleep after an hour I go up and get her - so no fighting involved, just frustrating. She definitely does start getting cranky during dinner and is awful during bedtime routine on days she doesn't nap, though. PS - I am afraid of a car baby, too. I was 6 cm when I got to the hospital and was like 9 cm when they checked me two hours later, and that was my first vaginal birth. I really think if DD had been #2 she would have been born in my house or car because I waited so long to go to the hospital. 

    @Stormiewinter I've noticed on no nap days DD goes to sleep at 7:30, but on days when she naps she wont fall asleep until between 8:30 and 9:30 despite us putting her to bed by 7:45. It's pretty awful how late she stays up!

    @robyn2201 look at you living the dream with kids taking naps into kindergarten! I wish a family nap would work, but she pretty much only sleeps in her own bed unless she's utterly, utterly exhausted. If I bring her in my bed she will ask to watch a movie. 

    @kipper-2 My labor was completely different from my mom's. I had horrific back labor for hours and hours before my water broke and I went immediately into active labor. My mom's water broke in the shower (so she didnt even realize) and this was long before she was even close to active labor so they had her all set up with an epidural and I think had to give her some induction type meds. I don't think she ever even had to experience the pains of active labor lol. I came 2 weeks late, DD came 2 days early. Overall, extremely different labor stories and experiences. I guess we were both able to give birth vaginally, so there's one similarity. 

    @brie_and_almonds omg your post just freaked me out. I had a dream that I had this baby at home in my bedroom and DH had to deliver her because I kept saying "there's no back labor, it can't be real labor!" Ahhh, I hope I can recognize real labor this time even if there's no back labor! I've been having braxton hicks since 15 weeks, and had them starting at 20 with DD, so I didn't believe I was in real labor with her until my water broke.  :#
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  • @poshspice I remember also making DD a "quiet time" box, with Colour Wonder books, reusable sticker pad, play doh, I can't even remember what else (if you google or Pinterest you'll find lots of ideas).  We pulled that out if I needed some peaceful time to nurse DD2.  But once we had her lip tie issue sorted out and she got better at breast feeding, she pretty much had to learn to latch on and drink whether I was sitting calmly or moving about a bit.  I could usually nurse her sitting on the floor and do a puzzle with DD1 or DD1 would cuddle up beside us on the couch and we'd read a book while DD2 nursed.   It was one of those things that I worried a lot about ahead of time but once I was actually living it it came much more naturally and easily than I expected it to.
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