N18 Chit Chat & Updates m/o December 18 - Page 3 — The Bump
November 2018 Moms

N18 Chit Chat & Updates m/o December 18

13

Re: N18 Chit Chat & Updates m/o December 18

  • Moms who are BFing and going back to work- at what point will you introduce a bottle? With DS1, we introduced a bottle at 4 weeks. He fought it for months and it was so stressful. He ended up finally taking one but still preferred nursing so wouldn’t drink much all day when I was at work but then would nurse all night to make up for it. DD got a bottle from Day 1 since she had an immature sucking reflex and I EPed with her until she finally latched at 2 months. She went back and forth between breast and bottle with no issue from that point on. I’m nervous to try it because of my experience with DS1. This little guy is an amazing nurser and I don’t want to mess with it. But I do go back to work in 6 weeks (he’s 6 weeks now.)
    Not able to answer your question but I have one for you. How did you get your DD to latch after 2 months? I've been occasionally trying to get Sydney to latch but she screams bloody murder and it makes me feel really bad. The LC squirted some milk into her mouth while S was kind of sort of latched but she was still screaming. I'm currently trying to decide if I should keep trying or just accept that I'll be an exclusive pumper again. 
    *TW*
    Me: 31 | DH: 33
    DD1: 8/2014  <3
    TTC #2: 6/2017
    BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
    BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
    BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
    BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
    DD2: 10/2018  <3
  • @offtoneverland I can help answer your question. Ds1 was a horrible nurser until about 10 weeks old. To help with his latch, I put him on the breast at every peep. When he slept, we did skin to skin, so when he woke, he could smell my breast milk and start rooting. The big thing was a lot of experimentation with positions and patience. The more stressed I got, the more upset he got. With M, we have to do laid back nursing on the lady side for him to latch. You may just need to find a comfy way for her to latch. You can also see if she will do a breast crawl and latch on her own. You can watch a video on YouTube, it's pretty cool. The big thing that helped us was patience and time and the LC. I went to a BF support group and it went a long way to helping. See if there is one in your area. 
    booksandcoffee
  • @booksandcoffee I would say you can start introducing it now, but have your H do it. Depending on how your babe is, you may need to leave the room. Let it be your shower time! If you start now, he will hopefully take it no problem by the time you go back to work. I would also try to do the bottle when he first starts showing hunger cues. This way he is still relaxed and it's not stressful. Stop when he's over it and try again later or the next day. 
    offtoneverland
  • @offtoneverland I can help answer your question. Ds1 was a horrible nurser until about 10 weeks old. To help with his latch, I put him on the breast at every peep. When he slept, we did skin to skin, so when he woke, he could smell my breast milk and start rooting. The big thing was a lot of experimentation with positions and patience. The more stressed I got, the more upset he got. With M, we have to do laid back nursing on the lady side for him to latch. You may just need to find a comfy way for her to latch. You can also see if she will do a breast crawl and latch on her own. You can watch a video on YouTube, it's pretty cool. The big thing that helped us was patience and time and the LC. I went to a BF support group and it went a long way to helping. See if there is one in your area. 
    @offtoneverland I did just about everything above! I worked with an amazing LC and went to a BF support group weekly once a week during my leave. I joined a bunch of FB support groups for ideas to read when I was back at work too. Every day we did a ton of skin to skin. When she was relaxed and hungry- before she turned HANGRY- I would attempt to latch. I used a nipple shield sometimes too because it is a good in between from bottle to breast. For awhile she would just freak out and flat out refuse. The skin to skin helped the most, especially when she was in that sleepy in between state. Eventually we found a position she didn’t mind trying to nurse in and did that For awhile until her latch was more solid. It was an exhausting process but I was so worried about having to EP full time with a toddler at home too since it was really starting to impact him. 
    wildrainbowofftoneverland
  • @booksandcoffee I would say you can start introducing it now, but have your H do it. Depending on how your babe is, you may need to leave the room. Let it be your shower time! If you start now, he will hopefully take it no problem by the time you go back to work. I would also try to do the bottle when he first starts showing hunger cues. This way he is still relaxed and it's not stressful. Stop when he's over it and try again later or the next day. 
    yes, my husband is going to give him the bottle. I will either take a shower or take my other two kiddos outside so that he can’t smell me. And if he fusses I will immediately rush over so I need to be somewhere I can’t hear him lol. My husband is really patient luckily. 
  • @booksandcoffee I would say you can start introducing it now, but have your H do it. Depending on how your babe is, you may need to leave the room. Let it be your shower time! If you start now, he will hopefully take it no problem by the time you go back to work. I would also try to do the bottle when he first starts showing hunger cues. This way he is still relaxed and it's not stressful. Stop when he's over it and try again later or the next day. 
    yes, my husband is going to give him the bottle. I will either take a shower or take my other two kiddos outside so that he can’t smell me. And if he fusses I will immediately rush over so I need to be somewhere I can’t hear him lol. My husband is really patient luckily. 
    You've got a good plan, now you just have top implement it. I hope it goes smoothly and he doesn't fuss too much.
  • @highsteaks lo1 struggled a bit, because if her personality what helped get was giving her responsibilities around the house. This also helped this time as she stepped up her responsibilities. I am trying to figure things out with dd2 currently since she also had trouble sleeping last week and seems to just now be recovering.

    @booksandcoffee I would try in about 4 weeks, start small with one bottle a day and work up from there. All of mine have been combo fed and none experienced nipple confusion. They have all preferred nursing but accepted the bottle because my body couldn't keep up with their nutritional needs.
    highsteaks
  • @booksandcoffee we tried unsuccessfully at just under two weeks. I had a wake to attend for a former student and I couldn’t drive due to still being on pain meds and it was an hour and a half away so my amazing husband drove us and we brought a bottle I worked so hard to pump for. Well, she started fussing as soon as we got there and refused the bottle so I had to feed her in the car. I made it through the line, said my prayer, and back home we went. But my DH was trying to hastily give the bottle to her while standing in a bathroom after changing her. It was then I found out he never fed a baby a bottle before. At that point the baby was hysterically crying so we had to hightail it to the car. DH was frustrated because he thought we should have practiced (agreed but I did not realize he never fed a baby a bottle before) By the time we got home the milk was at room
    temp for over 5 hours so I had to dump it. We (meaning he lol) have since practiced and she will take it. I went to a party last week so I pumped up enough that she took 4 bottles while I was out and overnight and she happily hopped on my boob the next morning. We use the Phillips avent slowest nipple and bottle and it works for us. I anticipate she will need 1-3 bottles
    a day when I go back to work depending if she goes 2 hours or 4 hours between feedings and I’ll pump once while I’m at work. I think we got lucky- I feel like she’d suck on anything I give her but I know that could change and it’s not as easy for everyone. I hope you can easily transition but I do not recommend your first attempt being in a funeral home restroom with a rookie bottle handler!!! Other PP’s tips seem much more helpful!!
    offtoneverlandhollyeva
  • highsteakshighsteaks
    Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    member
    edited December 2018
    @booksandcoffee your comments are so helpful, thank you! i was wondering how long it took to get food out of your system, so thanks for that info. yes, i gave up after a week, and i should have stuck it out. i am drinking milk again, but i’ve cut way back on the amount—just a bit in coffee, butter when needed, no more bowls of cereal and milk  :( and the girls seem to be ok... not perfect but much better than a few weeks ago. can you elaborate on what the before and after was like?
        yea, i believe we are right around that timeframe re:dd1 honeymoon period! it’s been 9 weeks since birth, 6 that they’ve been home.  the 3yo emotions are explosive. i’ve never seen dd1 so intense. i’m emotionally drained. drinking all the wine now.

    @offtoneverland that’s amazing that you’ve gotten Sydney to latch twice! go you!! definitely progress. just fyi, you can still continue to progress, but every so often she could refuse or even seem to forget how to do it; don’t let that frustrate you, it’s just part of the process. keep it up! and i bet being more relaxed and happy since seeing the lc is probably helping your supply too! yay, so excited for you!

    @arieselle i would have cried after having to dump milk when you worked so hard to pump for it. you are amazing for doing all of that and getting out of the house with a newborn to pay your respects.

    @hollyeva the sleep disturbance! she was so good about sleeping in her own bed by herself, but now she’s crying and pleading every night to sleep with us so we “chase the bad dreams away.” breaks my heart. it’s hard to deny her with those waterworks.
    offtoneverlandhollyeva
  • @highsteaks oh goodness, dd2 is doing that with us as well. LO was good about sleeping in her bassinet last night and dd2 ended up in bed with us last night. She's had a lot of temper tantrums lately, trying to head them off by giving her special mommy time with just us. I think she misses having me to herself, meanwhile dd1 has been amazing with helping (sometimes too much, lol) and stepping up her Independence.
    highsteaks
  • Well, I'm done. The kids have officially driven me crazy. Is it bedtime yet? I'm about to crawl in the corner and cry.
    hollyeva
  • @hollyeva i think dd1 is missing all the attention now too. making a concerted effort to focus on her more, but mustering the energy is tough.

    @wildrainbow oh sweet sweet bedtime. what are the kiddos doing to you?

    i am going through 15+ years of photos on the computer to thin them down for transfer to the new computer. seeing pre-kid pics, man i looked so much more rested and freespirited. and tan. i miss being tan.
    hollyeva
  • @highsteaks it's been a full day of tantrums from the toddler terrorist and crying from M. I'm beyond touched out. Also, I miss being tan too. Having a red head with practically translucent skin does not allow a lot of outside/sun time. It looks like M may have my more olive skin tone, which will be nice. Ds1 and H (who is also super pale) can hang inside and M and I can enjoy the outdoors. I really can't wait. 
    highsteaks
  • @highsteaks before cutting out dairy and soy and adding the reflux meds, DS1 was my grumpy baby. So much fussiness, stretches of crying despite all my best attempts to soothe, lots of acting uncomfortable (gulpy, gaggy, sounded congested, wiggly at all hours- not just during the MOTN like many babies.) It was rough. 

    Im sorry the kids were beast mode yesterday. I hope they’re kinder to you today. My DD is struggling with the adjustment. She loves her baby brother but has major feelings with me. Lots of meltdowns, doing negative things for my attention, refusing to comply. It’s freaking exhausting. 
    highsteaks
  • My husband took DS1 and DD so that I could nap with the baby but if the baby lets me put him down, I’m showering. I smell like milk, hot flashes (anyone else getting hot flashes when they sleep? I wake up a sweaty mess even if it’s only an hour stretch between feedings), and exhaustion. 
    wildrainbowofftoneverlandhollyeva
  • @booksandcoffee +1 to waking up sweaty. also getting out of bed for the early morning feeding is brutal. almost wonder if just staying up after the 4am feed would be less harsh.
    wildrainbowofftoneverlandbooksandcoffeehollyeva
  • @booksandcoffee +1 to waking up sweaty. also getting out of bed for the early morning feeding is brutal. almost wonder if just staying up after the 4am feed would be less harsh.
    All of this. The 4 am feed is the hardest one for sure!
    booksandcoffeehollyevahighsteaks
  • M had his 2 month appt today. I really hate the shots. He was 7lb5oz and 21.5 inches long. The dr wants him on the growth chart for weight in the 5th percentile by 6 months. I'm really tired of hearing about his weight. He freaking gained 3 oz in 5 days!! He is growing exactly like ds1. We are keeping him on Zantac, and adding probiotics. We may be referred to a pediatric pulmonologist if he keeps having obstructive apnea episodes. I feel like we keep taking one step forward and two back. Hopefully, in two months we won't have to worry about it. 
    hollyeva
  • M had his 2 month appt today. I really hate the shots. He was 7lb5oz and 21.5 inches long. The dr wants him on the growth chart for weight in the 5th percentile by 6 months. I'm really tired of hearing about his weight. He freaking gained 3 oz in 5 days!! He is growing exactly like ds1. We are keeping him on Zantac, and adding probiotics. We may be referred to a pediatric pulmonologist if he keeps having obstructive apnea episodes. I feel like we keep taking one step forward and two back. Hopefully, in two months we won't have to worry about it. 
    I’m sorry is was a frustrating appointment ;( some babies are just smaller- it’s frustrating that the doctor is focused on that especially if it’s typical for your babies to be smaller. He’s growing!
  • @booksandcoffee +1 to waking up sweaty. also getting out of bed for the early morning feeding is brutal. almost wonder if just staying up after the 4am feed would be less harsh.
    All of this. The 4 am feed is the hardest one for sure!
    I go back to work in 6 weeks and will probably just stay awake after the 4 am feeding since I have to start getting ready at 5. 
  • ^ I want to cry just thinking about going back to work. 
    offtoneverlandlurvleybunchococonuts
  • @booksandcoffee Yeah, he seems to be just like ds1, tall and skinny. Ds1 isn't even 3 and almost 40 inches and barely 30 pounds. They take after their father, he's also tall and skinny. It's times like this that I'm sad our old pedi retired. She was amazing and understood that all kids grew differently. 
  • ^ I want to cry just thinking about going back to work. 
    Me too.  :'( I go back it work in 4 weeks. I should have already been back to work 2 weeks ago if not for everything that happened to S. Not looking forward to it one bit.

    @wildrainbow The same thing happened to a friend of mine with her little boy. He was teeny tiny and wasn't meeting the doctors expectations so they referred him to all sorts of specialists just to determine that he's small.  :| she was really frustrated. 
    *TW*
    Me: 31 | DH: 33
    DD1: 8/2014  <3
    TTC #2: 6/2017
    BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
    BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
    BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
    BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
    DD2: 10/2018  <3
    booksandcoffee
  • @wildrainbow got the same problem in the opposite end of things. P was born huge, and 2 weeks later she's not back to her birth weight so I have to keep going in for weight checks. She's sleepy when she eats and doesn't want to eat more than a 2.5 oz. supplement at each feeding. The doctor wants her to have 3, but I can't keep her awake enough to get it in her. She's also been sitting up like crazy. She's not ridiculously under weight though so I am trying really hard not to panic about it.
  • I just read 45 replies and can't hardly remember what I read. It's been hard to get on a computer lately especially with Christmas coming up! I feel like I spend half my time nursing a baby and then have to take care of DS1 and everything else the rest of the time. 

    @wildrainbow - I'm glad his heart checked out ok! That is frustrating about the doc, but hopefully after a bit of time they'll see that's just how he grows. We're at the other end of the spectrum. My 4 year old's BMI is apparently high (he's 43lbs and I think 41 inches tall, I don't remember the height for sure). He's always been 90something percentile for weight and if you actually look at him he looks fine! 

    Hope you ladies are doing well and as always I will try to check in more. Hope everyone has a happy holidays! 
    *TW*
    Me:32 DH:32
    Dx: PCOS - on metformin
    DS born 11/2014
    TTC #2
    5 failed IUIs
    1 IUI ending in mc & d&c at 9.5w - girl with trisomy 16
    Pursuing IVF with CCRM - ODWU done - IVF set for May-June
    Surprise BFP 3/5 - Rainbow baby due 11/9/18 - Team Green


    wildrainbowhighsteaks
  • life’s crazy over here too. can’t seem to find a moment to actually type out anything. but nothing exciting to update you all with, anyways. i was able to find another ENT doc for the girls’ tongue and lip ties, but the earliest we could get a consult is jan 7. then we’ll have to wait a bit longer for the actual procedure since apparently it has to be done at the hospital according to the receptionist. so excited to have to wait another month to fix emilia’s bad latch. also, elise has started clicking while nursing so i wanted the specialist to give me a second opinion.

    so, what is everyone doing for christmas? we’re staying home, probably doing a nice but small dinner. dh wants to attempt to drive around to look at xmas lights at some point. we’ll make cookies for santa on xmas eve. i did manage to get to a few stores yesterday and do a little xmas shopping. i am so not looking forward to wrapping. the twins are getting a floor mirror for tummy time and a rattle set.
        
    hollyevamockingjay1
  • highsteakshighsteaks
    Seventh Anniversary 500 Love Its 1000 Comments First Answer
    member
    edited December 2018
    i just remembered two questions that have been on my mind lately.
         what are everyone’s post baby body aches and pains like? i’m 10 weeks out and my lower abdominal muscles still feel painfully weak and my hip twinges with pain when i cross my legs. 
         and how often are you feeding overnight? the pedi still doesn’t want us going longer than 4 hours between feedings, but according to kellymom the girls fit the criteria to stop waking to feed overnight. i want to follow the pedi’s recommendation but... i also miss sleep. dd1 didn’t sleep well for months, so i sorta feel foolish for not taking advantage of how well these two are currently sleeping at night. i had an unusually long day yesterday, and accidentally overslept for the 1st motn feeding tonight: the first of the girls woke me to feed about 5.5 hours since the last meal. she wasn’t crying with desperation or anything. a 5 hour block of sleep—i feel pretty well rested at the moment  :D
    eta—of course it seems like emilia is also feeling well rested at the moment because she won’t go back to sleep! 3:30am is not playtime, love.
    hollyeva
  • @highsteaks I am feeding Penelope every 3 hours at night and almost every 2 hours during the day. She just got back to birth weight yesterday (plus one more ounce) at one day shy of 3 weeks. I have been a lunatic about getting her to eat more at each feeding. There's been a lot of harassing a sleepy baby involved, which just isn't fun. I do feel like all my time is spent nursing or preparing to just (and pump, and bottle feed) which doesn't happen as much when DD1 and DD2 are home. Our Christmas plans are similar, going to attempt to get Santa photos done and baking cookies on Christmas Eve. We also have a ton of Amazon boxes we have to open and put under the tree from family. I figure whatever we don't get done this weekend will have to wait until Christmas Eve. 

    Merry Christmas all!
    highsteakswildrainbow
  • @highsteaks I am still pretty tender, especially around my scar. My hips hurt a lot too. I'm giving myself 4 months PP and slowly walking as exercise to see if things get better. If not, then, I am calling my Dr and asking what is going on. As far as feeding goes, M goes no longer that 4.5 hours. I feed him on demand. I'm super jealous of your 5 hour block of sleep. Like....i would secretly hate you, but I like you to much kind of jealous. 

    @hollyeva I'm glad P got back to her birth weight. Ds1 took 6 weeks to get back to his. My niece took about 3 weeks. Some babies just take a while to get adjusted. 

    AFM: We still have zero christmas decorations up. In my defense, today is H's first day off since Thanksgiving, so today the tree will go up. Better late than never! I think M is going through a leap. He's been extra cranky and has been waking every 2 hours to eat. I'm over it and super tired. Ds1 has been extra as well. He's over the baby and often wants me to put him down, usually when I'm feeding. I'm glad H is home so that he can keep him entertained. They are going to see Santa today or tomorrow. It sucks M can't go, but that is just asking him to get sick. We will spend Christmas in prison, I mean home. After a while the house starts to feel like a prison. Not being able to go anywhere sucks monkey balls, and I feel guilty for it since it's the one thing keeping M healthy. Ugh, mom guilt is the worst. 
    hollyeva
  • @wildrainbow sounds like you're making the best decisions for the health of your family. I (foolishly) took P with MH and DD1 & 2 to a kids holiday party yesterday and started bleeding heavier after things had started to clear up. I am taking it easy now, and it was really nice to go and see friends but was very much a risk to poor P and myself. It really does feel isolating though when there's all this holiday stuff going on and the best choice is to stay home.
  • @hollyeva Ugh, the bleeding sucks. I was still spotting until 2 weeks ago. I hope P doesnt get sick from her outing. I know how hard it is to be confined. We are in isolation until flu/RSV season is over because M is at such high risk because of his lungs. I hope y'all stay healthy and you can enjoy at least some Christmas fun. 
  • @hollyeva & @wildrainbow cold and flu season totally sucks. the girls caught their first cold from dd1 the day before they turned 2 months. no fever, but they got stuffy noses. lasted about 2-3 days. assuming that breastfeeding helped stave off something longer lasting or more miserable, so thankful for that. staying isolated does feel like self imprisonment, but with M’s lungs, you can’t be too careful with him. but absolutely take the chance when your dh has the day off to duck out and take a few hours to yourself and go do something. a happy mom is also good for everyone else. 
    wildrainbowhollyeva
  • To answer questions from above:

    For Christmas we are having my parents come for a few days, then DH's dad and his wife will come for a day, and then MIL and SIL and her DH will come for a day (all spread out). It's nice that we aren't traveling anywhere. We've got the tree and stockings up and lights on the house but otherwise no other decorations. 

    As for feedings we're feeding on demand and have been for over a month. Spence has gone 4-8 hours (usually 5-6 hours) between the last feeding of the night and the MOTN feed so he's up 1-2x a night. He eats every 2-3 hours during the day. He's over 5 pounds above his birthweight now weighing over 13 pounds. 

    I'm feeling pretty good from my c-section finally. No more shooting nerve pain or incision pain. I am 7 weeks pp. I really need to start eating better and working out to some degree. 

    @wildrainbow - I'm sorry you guys are cooped up. It sucks even though it's for good reason. 
    *TW*
    Me:32 DH:32
    Dx: PCOS - on metformin
    DS born 11/2014
    TTC #2
    5 failed IUIs
    1 IUI ending in mc & d&c at 9.5w - girl with trisomy 16
    Pursuing IVF with CCRM - ODWU done - IVF set for May-June
    Surprise BFP 3/5 - Rainbow baby due 11/9/18 - Team Green


    wildrainbowhighsteaks
  • merry christmas, ladies and babies!
    offtoneverlandwildrainbowariesellehollyeva
  • @hollyeva That pose kills me! 

    How was everyone's Christmas? Any fun gifts? My most favorite gifts were my new necklace with both girls' birthstones and a Happy Baby Carrier! The carrier is amazing and I'm already getting a ton of use out of it around the house. Hope you all had a great Christmas! 
    *TW*
    Me: 31 | DH: 33
    DD1: 8/2014  <3
    TTC #2: 6/2017
    BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
    BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
    BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
    BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
    DD2: 10/2018  <3
    mockingjay1hollyevalurvleybunchococonuts
  • @highsteaks Me too! I also didn't get a picture of Sydney on Christmas day. I felt really bad. It's hard with tiny babies though. They just kind of lay there, so it slipped my mind. I at least got a pic of the girls in front of the tree a few days before Christmas, so I can pretend it was Christmas day.  :p

    How did your oldest like ice skating? I'm sorry your husband didn't get you anything. :( I can understand that being disappointing. I laughed at you wrapping up a box of pop tarts for him. Haha! 
    *TW*
    Me: 31 | DH: 33
    DD1: 8/2014  <3
    TTC #2: 6/2017
    BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
    BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
    BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
    BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
    DD2: 10/2018  <3
    highsteaksmockingjay1lurvleybunchococonuts
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