We had a top ten list for #1, we knew she was a girl. I ended up picking a name that wasn't even on the list. As soon as they placed her on my chest, I knew her name. I think my husband went with it after my ridiculous labor!
@DuchessOfCambridge no shame here, at first I was hoping for a boy bc it'd be easier financially since we can reuse everything & all, but now I want a girl too bc I know this is my last baby. DH reeeeeally wants it to be a girl bc he wants one of each, but I know we'll be thrilled either way too. Arya is so pretty, it was high on our list bc it's so elegant and we're big GOT fans!
@nopegoat James is my favorite boys name and I've always loved Everett too!! I couldn't use James though bc it's "reserved" by my sister lol we fought growing up over who'd get to use it bc it was always her fav boys name too. Then she married one, so that pretty much sealed that debate since they want a Jr.😆
In my last BMB there were certain people who would flame the heck out of others for saying things like that because we should be grateful for a baby at all (we were!) and sex should never matter and we should never wish for one or the other. So I automatically went on defense. Glad others have felt the same!
In my last BMB there were certain people who would flame the heck out of others for saying things like that because we should be grateful for a baby at all (we were!) and sex should never matter and we should never wish for one or the other. So I automatically went on defense. Glad others have felt the same!
I think having a slight preference is a natural thing. Being "devastated" or "disappointed" once you have found out seems ungrateful and flammable to me.
Wife. Boy mom x6. Expecting #7. Wannabe homesteader. , 💙💙💙💙💙💙
@nopegoat Agreed 100%. And I get more irritated by parents who already have a kid, who know how much they (hopefully) love that kid, who are devastated by the sex of subsequent babies.
On the other hand, I find the statement "I just want a healthy baby," which is usually said in response, to be completely condescending. Because yeah, pretty sure everyone wants a healthy baby.
ETA: My MIL once admitted to me that when MH was born, she started sobbing because she'd wanted a girl so badly. In the hosptial. With a newborn. He was boy #3. WTF?!
@nopegoat I love the name Everett too! FFWC: I will definitely be disappointed (only for a moment) if this baby is not a girl. I have always envisioned having a daughter and had so many dreams about it, so it will be a little heartbreaking if that doesn't become a reality, but of course I will still be thrilled to have a child.
*TW*
Me: 32 │ DH: 35 Married 8/16/13 BFP#1 DS 11/13/16 BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18 BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
I think it's okay to be disappointed you won't get to experience having one or the other if it's your last baby or something. I also think sometimes you can't control the feelings like if you've always wanted a boy and you will now never have one, or you have three girls and got used to that idea but are now having a boy, that can be sad and take time to process. But, to all the women I've seen that happen to, by the time their babies are born they are beyond ecstatic and couldn't imagine it any other way. I don't see it as disappointment of having a girl for ex, but rather disappointment of not having a boy. If that makes any sense. I don't know, I get really entrenched in empathy!
Devastated is a bit much, though. And agreed @ruby696 that is one of the most annoying phrases ever.
ETA: Also not saying I will be disappointed one way or the other. I'd like a girl and might be a little like oh darn but having DS has been great (he'd be so cute with a baby brother!) and I truly am just excited to be pregnant and have another baby.
@DuchessOfCambridge Thank you! I’ve been hung up on that name for over 2 years now haha I don’t see her to be the type to care at all, but I absolutely do know people that would. I love Aria. So hard finding names you both like that someone doesn’t have someone or something attached to the name. I also don’t see anything wrong with hoping for one sex over the other. My husband was really hoping for a boy our first time, but he always said he would love having either and being healthy is most important. I assume in general, most people feel the same.
@vivereidescent I was thinking the same about having another boy being convenient to have all of my son’s cute clothes and might would have a closer relationship in the long run. My husband and his brother are so close, and neither one are very close with their younger sister. BUT, I would also be excited to have a girl too since this will more than likely be our last baby. I’ll be excited regardless. I’m just ready to find out. I could never have the patience to be team green! Haha
@DuchessOfCambridge I think it's okay and even normal to be disappointed about the loss of the experience of parenting a specific sex, however, I draw the line at allowing those feelings to color how you feel about or treat your child.
Agreed @nopegoat! It's still exciting and wonderful regardless. @ruby696 it makes me so sad that any child has to experience that! Being sad about missing out on an experience you always wanted is one thing, but taking it out on your child is so low and despicable!
*TW*
Me: 32 │ DH: 35 Married 8/16/13 BFP#1 DS 11/13/16 BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18 BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
@ruby696 I think having 4 boys already I'm a bit more sensitive to that kind of stuff but yea.. That kind of makes me sad.
I mentioned in another thread that I'm a total freak show when I go out into public with all my boys. Everyone wants to stop and comment. I can't tell you how many times people have said "I'm sorry" when I tell them yes they are in fact all boys and are all mine. Dude. Why are you sorry??! I love being a boy mom!
Wife. Boy mom x6. Expecting #7. Wannabe homesteader. , 💙💙💙💙💙💙
@nopegoat One of my best friends has two boys, which is exactly what she wanted. She's thrilled to be a boy mom and had her tubes tied when they did her c-section. She adores her boys and has no regrets.
I probably have some feelings on this because of my MIL. She was not a good mom to MH for the first year of his life because of her disappointment. MH and BILs are awesome and I think she's damn lucky to have such wonderful sons.
-James Mathieu (Mathieu is pronounced Matthew and is a family name. Since my H goes by James he goes by Mathieu) -Everett William -Charles Gregory -Russell Albert
We are trying to stay away from any repeating initials.
I really like all of your kids names! They all sound like such good strong names. i see why its so hard to think of a good boys name now.
You could always go for a Daniel!
Pregnancy #1 DD 08.30.2007 Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014 Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015 Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019 Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@DuchessOfCambridge I think she meant the van was on empty. Also, if it helps, Arya is hands down the best and most badass character in GOT.
I just finally realized what @DuchessOfCambridge was referring to and laughed my butt off! If @psychobutthead 's husband is doing drugs, too, she's so screwed! Hopefully not!
Names are so hard! Since DH is French, we have to make sure any name can be pronounced in both languages without being totally butchered. We’re team green this time around, so we’ll have to come up with two. Already dreading the arguments.
After dealing with DH childish crap and DD babyish is tantrum over no new dress I put in my prenatal workout dvd.
Ds did it with me the whole time lol. His little toddler booty was in childs pose and downward dog . That kid can really hold a plank.
He also did squats with me and kept trying to get me to lay on a pillow during the on your back stretches.
He stole my gatarode though.
Pregnancy #1 DD 08.30.2007 Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014 Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015 Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019 Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
Not gonna lie, I'm a little weirded out about a newer member in this group. If anyone has seen the intro thread recently you prob know who...I'm all for being an inclusive, supportive group - but something tells me this person is going to try to make a lot of things on here all about her & fill it with unnecessary drama. Just a gut feeling. Might be wrong & I hope I am. I just feel like anyone who feels the need to put actual names/details of others out there - I just don't feel comfortable sharing some things with people like that bc it seems so immature. I don't know if there's a polite way to tell them that there are hundreds of other women on here, so please don't think you're the only one who has had an interesting past etc... this, to me, is not the place for that. That's what therapists are for imo. Anyone else have thoughts about it?
Names are so hard. I think that there is a girl’s name that DH and I both agree on but boys names are so tough. Plus a bunch of names we like are taken by family/friends.
@expandcontract Me too!! I used to have the vocabulary that could rival a trucker and a sailor, but had to tone it down after DDs began to parrot everything back.
When you want to cuss so badly, and screaming out "Cheese and crackers!!!" just doesn't cut it...
We are fostering a pair of baby squirrels (under the watch and advice of a registered rehabber). They are seriously the sweetest things ever. They are bottle fed every 4hrs. Nice reminder of what's coming in a few months.
ETA: the other cutie in this pic in my Everett 😉
Wife. Boy mom x6. Expecting #7. Wannabe homesteader. , 💙💙💙💙💙💙
@nopegoat I really do love being a boy Mom too! And stoppp it!! Those baby squirrels are too sweet all cuddled up with each other! 😍 I’m such an animal person. It warms my heart to see people acting kindly to animals.
@expandcontract Also a part of the potty mouth club. 🤭 I’ve got to do better with a 2 year old that is repeating everything though!
I'm loving all my profanity filled sisters! Surprisingly, i actually do real well to mir swear in front of DD, MIL, or at work. I guess that's why i swear so much everywhere else. Gotta let it out!
@nopegoat OH. MY. GOD. My eyes can't decide whether to look at the squirrels or your son! Too freaking adorable!
@nopegoat that is the cutest picture!!! How long do you have to bottle feed the squirrels? Are they realeased back into nature or remain with you guys? your farm just seems pretty awesome to me
@nopegoat that is the cutest picture!!! How long do you have to bottle feed the squirrels? Are they realeased back into nature or remain with you guys? your farm just seems pretty awesome to me
@nopegoat my BIL and SIL have 5 boys and they have always been my parenting role models. Their kids are all older now (the youngest is in grade 2) but even when they had babies and toddlers, they made parenting even their wildest look natural - not necessarily easy, but they are always so steady and calm. Seriously, my heros.
As for the gender disappointment conversation... I do have difficulty with people who are disappointed with one sex or the other because they genuinely think one is superior to the other. Mainly, I see this among friends still deeply entrenched in patriarchy who believe they need a son to pass their name and all their patriarchal power on to. Otherwise, I recognize that you can't always control your emotions.
Also, DH and I secretly both want a third girl because I love the idea of having a house full of girls. On the other hand, maybe it would be nice to have a boy so I can experience getting peed in the face while changing a diaper?
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe DD2: October 2016 DC3: coming May 2019
@nopegoat my BIL and SIL have 5 boys and they have always been my parenting role models. Their kids are all older now (the youngest is in grade 2) but even when they had babies and toddlers, they made parenting even their wildest look natural - not necessarily easy, but they are always so steady and calm. Seriously, my heros.
As for the gender disappointment conversation... I do have difficulty with people who are disappointed with one sex or the other because they genuinely think one is superior to the other. Mainly, I see this among friends still deeply entrenched in patriarchy who believe they need a son to pass their name and all their patriarchal power on to. Otherwise, I recognize that you can't always control your emotions.
Also, DH and I secretly both want a third girl because I love the idea of having a house full of girls. On the other hand, maybe it would be nice to have a boy so I can experience getting peed in the face while changing a diaper?
I have a problem with people who are so deeply disappointed too by not getting the particular gender they hoped for.
My BIL anand his wife are that way. With their first they went on and on how they wanted a boy. They went on and on about a boynand what name they wanted. They never had a girl name picked out. Then they found out it was twins. So they told everyone they wanted boy girl or boy boy twins. Guess what twins where both girls.
Fast forwars to be being pregnant with my son and just learning the sex. They where pissed and had nothing to do with him. They started telling everyone they where going to start trying for a boy, not a baby that December.
Well they got pregnant this past summer. And its a boy. They pay no attention to their twins now. The kids look like hobos since they dont buy them clothes in the size they are in and are throwing all their money into prepping everything for a boy. New everything that is boy oriented. Mean while their five year olds are wearing size 3t dresses as shirts.
Pregnancy #1 DD 08.30.2007 Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014 Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015 Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019 Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@nopegoat Completely agree with that statement. Also agree that kids are much cuter when they go to bed haha!
@k2k2tog Little boys are pretty amazing, and surprisingly enough, I’ve probably only gotten peed on a couple of times! I’ll be happy with whatever we get, but I’d be completely fine with being a boy mama.
@nopegoat my BIL and SIL have 5 boys and they have always been my parenting role models. Their kids are all older now (the youngest is in grade 2) but even when they had babies and toddlers, they made parenting even their wildest look natural - not necessarily easy, but they are always so steady and calm. Seriously, my heros.
As for the gender disappointment conversation... I do have difficulty with people who are disappointed with one sex or the other because they genuinely think one is superior to the other. Mainly, I see this among friends still deeply entrenched in patriarchy who believe they need a son to pass their name and all their patriarchal power on to. Otherwise, I recognize that you can't always control your emotions.
Also, DH and I secretly both want a third girl because I love the idea of having a house full of girls. On the other hand, maybe it would be nice to have a boy so I can experience getting peed in the face while changing a diaper?
I have a problem with people who are so deeply disappointed too by not getting the particular gender they hoped for.
My BIL anand his wife are that way. With their first they went on and on how they wanted a boy. They went on and on about a boynand what name they wanted. They never had a girl name picked out. Then they found out it was twins. So they told everyone they wanted boy girl or boy boy twins. Guess what twins where both girls.
Fast forwars to be being pregnant with my son and just learning the sex. They where pissed and had nothing to do with him. They started telling everyone they where going to start trying for a boy, not a baby that December.
Well they got pregnant this past summer. And its a boy. They pay no attention to their twins now. The kids look like hobos since they dont buy them clothes in the size they are in and are throwing all their money into prepping everything for a boy. New everything that is boy oriented. Mean while their five year olds are wearing size 3t dresses as shirts.
That is so sad! But so common. I have an aunt and uncle who always treated their eldest son like royalty and the rest of their kids (two girls and another boy) like second class citizens. He grew up to be an egotistical jerk and the rest just wanted to escape their parents' house as quickly as they could.
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe DD2: October 2016 DC3: coming May 2019
@k2k2tog its very sad. When we tried for a baby thats what we tried for. We didn't care if it was a boy or girl. DS just happened to end up with a penis. But we didn't try for a particular sex. Hes 3.5 and they have never had anything to do with him still. They even refused to come to the hospital when he was born.
Pregnancy #1 DD 08.30.2007 Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014 Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015 Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019 Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
Re: Randoms 9/17
, 💙💙💙💙💙💙
@nopegoat James is my favorite boys name and I've always loved Everett too!! I couldn't use James though bc it's "reserved" by my sister lol we fought growing up over who'd get to use it bc it was always her fav boys name too. Then she married one, so that pretty much sealed that debate since they want a Jr.😆
@ElleJDubs that gif made me lol! So crazy!!!
I think having a slight preference is a natural thing. Being "devastated" or "disappointed" once you have found out seems ungrateful and flammable to me.
, 💙💙💙💙💙💙
On the other hand, I find the statement "I just want a healthy baby," which is usually said in response, to be completely condescending. Because yeah, pretty sure everyone wants a healthy baby.
ETA: My MIL once admitted to me that when MH was born, she started sobbing because she'd wanted a girl so badly. In the hosptial. With a newborn. He was boy #3. WTF?!
Married 8/16/13
BFP#1 DS 11/13/16
BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18
BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
Devastated is a bit much, though. And agreed @ruby696 that is one of the most annoying phrases ever.
ETA: Also not saying I will be disappointed one way or the other. I'd like a girl and might be a little like oh darn but having DS has been great (he'd be so cute with a baby brother!) and I truly am just excited to be pregnant and have another baby.
@nopegoat Love your names!
@vivereidescent I was thinking the same about having another boy being convenient to have all of my son’s cute clothes and might would have a closer relationship in the long run. My husband and his brother are so close, and neither one are very close with their younger sister. BUT, I would also be excited to have a girl too since this will more than likely be our last baby. I’ll be excited regardless. I’m just ready to find out. I could never have the patience to be team green! Haha
, 💙💙💙💙💙💙
Married 8/16/13
BFP#1 DS 11/13/16
BFP# 2 MMC dx @ 13w 10/30/18
BFP# 3 Preemie DD born at 38w (IUGR) on 8/28/19 weighing 5.5lbs. Our little miracle
I mentioned in another thread that I'm a total freak show when I go out into public with all my boys. Everyone wants to stop and comment. I can't tell you how many times people have said "I'm sorry" when I tell them yes they are in fact all boys and are all mine. Dude. Why are you sorry??! I love being a boy mom!
, 💙💙💙💙💙💙
I probably have some feelings on this because of my MIL. She was not a good mom to MH for the first year of his life because of her disappointment. MH and BILs are awesome and I think she's damn lucky to have such wonderful sons.
You could always go for a Daniel!
Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014
Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015
Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019
Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@expandcontract I felt so dumb
After dealing with DH childish crap and DD babyish is tantrum over no new dress I put in my prenatal workout dvd.
Ds did it with me the whole time lol. His little toddler booty was in childs pose and downward dog
He also did squats with me and kept trying to get me to lay on a pillow during the on your back stretches.
He stole my gatarode though.
Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014
Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015
Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019
Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
Married: 8/10/13
BFP- 12/18/15, D&E- 4/8/16 @ 21w5d- confirmed Thanatophoric Dysplasia
BFP- 11/7/17, M/C- 11/18/17 @ 4w6d
BFP- 8/25/18 ~ EDD- 5/9/19 ~ DD born 5/2/20 *Lillian Hazel*
BFP- 10/9/20 ~ EDD- 6/21/21
It's a stress reliever for me and its so refreshing.
When you want to cuss so badly, and screaming out "Cheese and crackers!!!" just doesn't cut it...
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ETA: the other cutie in this pic in my Everett 😉
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@expandcontract Also a part of the potty mouth club. 🤭 I’ve got to do better with a 2 year old that is repeating everything though!
@blessedinmt my vote is on the squirrels at the moment. The kid will be much cuter once he goes to bed LOL!!!
, 💙💙💙💙💙💙
@nopegoat OH. MY. GOD. My eyes can't decide whether to look at the squirrels or your son! Too freaking adorable!
As for the gender disappointment conversation... I do have difficulty with people who are disappointed with one sex or the other because they genuinely think one is superior to the other. Mainly, I see this among friends still deeply entrenched in patriarchy who believe they need a son to pass their name and all their patriarchal power on to. Otherwise, I recognize that you can't always control your emotions.
Also, DH and I secretly both want a third girl because I love the idea of having a house full of girls. On the other hand, maybe it would be nice to have a boy so I can experience getting peed in the face while changing a diaper?
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe
DD2: October 2016
DC3: coming May 2019
My BIL anand his wife are that way. With their first they went on and on how they wanted a boy. They went on and on about a boynand what name they wanted. They never had a girl name picked out. Then they found out it was twins. So they told everyone they wanted boy girl or boy boy twins. Guess what twins where both girls.
Fast forwars to be being pregnant with my son and just learning the sex. They where pissed and had nothing to do with him. They started telling everyone they where going to start trying for a boy, not a baby that December.
Well they got pregnant this past summer. And its a boy. They pay no attention to their twins now. The kids look like hobos since they dont buy them clothes in the size they are in and are throwing all their money into prepping everything for a boy. New everything that is boy oriented. Mean while their five year olds are wearing size 3t dresses as shirts.
Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014
Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015
Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019
Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020
@k2k2tog Little boys are pretty amazing, and surprisingly enough, I’ve probably only gotten peed on a couple of times! I’ll be happy with whatever we get, but I’d be completely fine with being a boy mama.
, 💙💙💙💙💙💙
DD1: June 2014 - VBM4lyfe
DD2: October 2016
DC3: coming May 2019
Pregnancy #2 Natural Miscarriage at 6 weeks 03/2014 Due date 11/9/2014
Pregnancy #3 DS 02.23.2015
Pregnancy #4 Missed Miscarriage at 11 weeks 11/2018 Due date 5/22/2019
Pregnancy #5 Positive test 12/11/2019 Due Date 8/17/2020