My bitch for the day is kinda long. So I had my check up last week and I'm still upset over it. To some it may seem silly but I'm still really upset over it. So first, im really hoping for a Vbac this delivery. My first cesarian was pretty traumatizing and afterwords I didn't have help taking care of ds because hubby couldn't get leave yet from work. The help my mother promised didn't happen because she bailed on me and went back to SC, I live in GA because dad was ready to leave. Anyways because of this id like to avoid a cesarian. My doctor is willing to let me try for a Vbac because my cesarian was due to a breech baby. Today we had an indepth talk about it and she told me I had to go in to labor on my own, and she would not induce me due to unteran rupture risks with induction. This really upset me because I was 41+3 when I had my cesarian, and up to that point I had no contractions at all. So I assumed if my body didnt go into labor, my last ditch effort for a vbac would be induction. I know its silly and I should be happy for a healthy baby no matter how he comes out, but unfortunatly due to the trama of my first birth experiance and recovery I cant help but feel very anxious about another csec. Bitch number two is, I haven't gained any weight this pregnancy thus far. So I go to my appointment and I've gained 4 pounds. So I'm like cool i guess ill start gaining weight now. I talk to my doctor and before the appointment is over she mentions to me that I need to watch my weight gain. Now I'm confused and I ask her what she means seeing as this is the first weight gain ive had. She tells me she doesn't want to increase my risk of high blood pressure and diabetes and that I should gain no more the 4 pounds by my next appointment. So I left very upset because I felt like at the first sign of weight gain i got a talking to, even though im almost in my third tri and just started to gain weight. I know I'm overweight, that's no secret. Im uber sensitive when it comes to my weight and my body, and I am someone that unfortunately can obsess over it at times. And thankfully this pregnancy I haven't been worried about my weight. Now after one conversation I feel like I'm cycling into that behavior again when I desperately dont want to. Also a pound a week weight gain in pregnancy is normal and healthy. So that whole conversation was very upsetting to me. Side note I actually only gained one pound, I had not number 2d in three days so I was very backed up at that appointment. I had just started to actually go that day, so by the next morning when I weighed id only gained 1 pound not 4. But even if I had I dont think I should have been made to feel bad about it. Anyways I'm sorry if this is all over the place, I just needed to vent.
@lavenderlisa I'm sorry you're having a hard time today! I'd be upset over the VBAC vs. C-section talk as well! I bet that you'll go into labor on your own though. If you're worried about it, start researching natural methods to help bring on labor sooner that you could start around 39 weeks. Who knows if they actually work, but there is something to be said for the placebo effect. Walking, sex, acupuncture, eating dates and eggplant, raspberry leaf tea, etc. None of those are proven to actually help, but there's a lot of anecdotal evidence that says that it might. Also, re: the weight gain - that was very insensitive of your doctor! 1 pound a week is certainly healthy and, if you haven't gained anything yet, don't worry about if it's even a bit more than that (no matter where you started.) Hopefully your day will get better from here on out. Hugs!
@lavenderlisa I'm sorry you are having a hard time. Maybe the VBAC will work out on its own. Just because you didn't go into labour on your own the first time doesn't mean it won't happen this time.. Maybe your body knows what to do now. Keep positive! As for weight gain, I think that's crazy. 4lb could even be water weight. I know it's harder to let that type of thing go if you are already sensitive to that, but I would just try to brush that off. I mean, eat healthy (get lots of protein and vitamins) and don't let your doctor worry you about 4lb like that..
@lavenderlisa I’m sorry you had a frustrating appointment. I hope you have a chance to try for your vbac, but what your Dr said makes sense too. And I totally understand about weight counseling- too much, too little - are all super stressful to moms who are trying our best. I got counseled at an appointment and came here to complain too a couple months ago.
@lavenderlisa I'm sorry about your appointment. I had to get talked to about my weight at my last appointment (I had gained 11 lbs in 4 weeks ) I don't even know how that happened. Luckily I'm not still on that track of gaining, BUT I will say you can only do so much in regards to weight. Try to make healthy choices and stay moving, but your body will do what it wants. Hugs
Thank you @Jens_Hoes@Activebaby@ab_canada@omnommer. I know I'm stressing about things that are mostly out of my hands. I'm a very emotional overly sensitive person on a regular day. It's so much worse being pregnant lol thanks for the support ladies.
@lavenderlisa I'm so sorry about your appointment. I can imagine taking all of that in was tough. Hopefully, since this is the second time around, your body will be more willing to go into labor, especially if LO is in the correct position! As for your weight, some doctors are just programmed to talk about weight. You aren't doing a thing wrong. Try to put it out of your head and keep doing what you've been doing!
Thank you @texas_t I took the weight gain talk to heart, when im certain my doctor was just giving me the same talk she gives everyone, and not meaning to pick on me. I'm trying not to obsess, key word "trying". Now that im thinking over the csec talk again, I know I also got upset because I was told at 32 weeks we will schedual a csec and ill get my vbac if i happen to go into labor before. Its upsetting because I feel like a csec it what we are ultimately planning for. Setting a date makes a csec to official for me. My doctors office wants you ready to have a baby by 41weeks. I plan on scheduling the csec as far out as i can to give my body a chance to go into labor. Sorry im saying "csec" alot lol
@lavenderlisa With my DS I was induced at 41w3d I hadn't dilated or effaced at all. I ended up with a c-section. I talked to my OB about a vbac and they told me the same thing as your OB. They'd schedule a c-section for 41w3d and if I went into labor, then cool, if not, no extraneous measures because their is too much risk. I ultimately decided on a repeat c because my babe wasn't breech, my body just didn't wanna birth a baby. Just keep repeating to yourself that, what ultimately happens, is for the well being of your and baby. You are more aware what recovery entails, so you can at least be more prepared.
@texas_t thanks for checking in. Still kind of muddling through today, doesn't help that I got at most 5 hours of sleep last night - too much on my mind, and I've been having a lot of contractions/tightness in my belly, so it was hard to relax. It'll probably be better tonight, just because I'm too tired to fight it anymore.
@lavenderlisa I'm sorry you had a shitty appointment. As far as the c-section, I'd try not to worry about your body going into labor or not. There's not a lot you can do about it, and worry now just means you're suffering even more. This is very, "do as I say, not as I do" advice, because Lord knows my days are preoccupied with what's going to happen in the next three months, but you might be happier just spending 10 minutes every day envisioning your body going into labor and having the birth you want, and trying to push all the negative thoughts out. As far as the weight, I don't even know what to tell you. I'd probably bring that up as a concern at my next appointment, because there's no reason for you to be worried about your weight gain at this point.
@lavenderlisa Ugh, I am so sorry. I had a very similar experience with my previous OB. They have a stick up their butts whenever a pregnant woman gains any weight. Guess what -- we're pregnant. We're going to gain a little weight.
Thank you for the support ladies. I know I can't do anything about how I deliver. So I'm doing my best to focus on the baby ill get In the end, while also really preparing myself for another csec. I know, no matter how I deliver, recovery will be easier this time around because my husbands will have 4-6 weeks off when baby comes, depending on how I deliver. So I will have help with no chance of abandonment like last time. Sharing my fears and frustrations has made me less tence about the situation with you ladies support though, thank you.
@lavenderlisa I completely understnad your fear re: VBAC or repeat C. I ended up with a c-section last time due to failure to progress and fetal distress. I would love to VBAC this time, but I completely understand their reasoning in not inducing due to concerns about uterine rupture. My doctor is totally supportive about me trying to VBAC, but recommended scheduling a c-section "just in case', so that if it comes to that I can have the doctor I like and it will be easier for H to plan ahead at work and for childcare with DS. Good luck! I hope you are abe to VBAC!
@lavenderlisa I'm sorry the appointment went so crappy I hope that your doctor was having an off day & doesn't continue to be tough on you about weight. You're doing WONDERFUL & I noticed in HDBD that your legs & arms look like they are so thin! If you haven't gained at this point, you've actually lost weight.. so shame on your doctor for making you feel apprehensive about future gains.
@omnommer hah! I'm sure they wouldn't like that, but they didn't tell me not to? She just said to make sure I keep some high protein snacks with me wherever I go and to be sure to eat something light every hour to help keep my blood sugar up.. I guess it can get worse/more concerning the bigger I get so she just said to be aware of how I'm feeling when I'm driving/moving around a lot. It definitely makes sense with how exhausted and hungry I feel all the time!!
@lavenderlisa I'm so sorry you had such a rough appointment. I don't know anything about VBAC's but from what I do, thats pretty standard procedure to not induce. Sending you good thoughts that you'll be able to go into labor on your own and have your VBAC! As for your doctor's rude comment, big hugs! 4lbs is not a big deal at all and you should be way proud of that!! Hopefully they keep their mouth shut from here on out.
Thank you @temmetime@orangecrush29 my family have been commenting that my limbs look much smaller than they normally due, so its funny you say that lol. I could cry you ladies are so supportive!!! Seriously *wipes tears* you make me feel like I'm not crazy lol
@orangecrush29 sorry about the hypoglycemia. Definitely keep snacks with you, especially if you start feeling faint or dizzy!
@runrinserepeat sorry you're having such a rough time. Hoping you can at least get some restful sleep.
@lavenderlisa What a bummer you had a crappy appointment today. I think your doctor probably wasn't aware that you hadn't gained weight yet because why else bring up weight gain? And even if you HAD been gaining, 4 lbs is healthy and normal in 4 weeks. Not to mention, my weight can fluctuate more than 4 lbs in one day! I'm sure it was a significant overreaction, keep doing what you've been doing, and don't give it another thought. You've got this!
As for me, ultrasound today went well! Baby looks healthy and active as ever, so that was a relief! She was stubborn but this tech was MUCH better than the last one. Gentler, skilled, and more patient. She thinks we FINALLY got the pictures we needed of baby's heart and hands. Plus I got a bonus profile shot Will share in the US thread for AWing.
@lavenderlisa I am so sorry your appointment felt so crappy. I had similar experience with my first. I lost weight in the beginning, was questioned about my eating habits because I wasn’t gaining the first few weeks of my second trimester and then gained 4 lbs between monthly appointments. My OB freaked out and had me to my glucose tolerance test the next day and I ended up having GD. She said after not gaining four lbs is considered a rapid gain. I went into the appointment so proud to have finally gained and then felt like I was treated like a criminal for endangering my baby. It’s maddening because gaining weight during pregnancy is expected but if it was really only a pound I doubt you have anything to worry about!!
@scaredunprepared unfortunately she knew id not been gaining. Her exact words after I asked what she meant by watch my weight gain, since id not gained weight until now was, "yeah you were down a pound, so your only up three so far. I just dont want to increase your risk of high bp and diabetes. Try not to gain more than 4 pounds by next appointment and that will be fine." But yeah im trying not to dwell on it. @LLynde5 she didn't mention anything about gd. I'm schedualed for a regular glucose test I the 26th, but everytime they have checked my sugar its been fine. But thank you for the encouragement, yall make me feel sane.
2 weeks ago DH and I brought out a crockpot full of soup, fresh baked rolls and a bag of energy balls for B&SIL who had a baby on August 10th. While we were out there they didn't even thank us at all which I thought was ridiculously rude, but he's one of the entitled acting people (insert eyeroll) & she obviously just had a baby so whatever. Well, I guess we left a sippy cup with powerade/water in it & an outfit that DS peed through while we were there (oops - don't ever forget diapers ya'll, just don't) SIL left a bag in our door yesterday with the STILL WET peed on outfit in a knotted bag & the juice still in the cup. I opened the bag and of course it completely ranked of ammonia. Why the hell would you wait two weeks and give us back dirty things? I didn't even realize we left them there and it just seemed odd & a little rude. If someone leaves something at my house, I return it in good condition.. so I would just think it's common sense to not put a full of pee outfit in a airtight bag & leave the sippy full of anything but water. (Thankfully it wasn't milk) WWYD? Just toss both? I don't see mold in the sippy, but ....bacteria. Tell me if I am being a brat.
@temmetime how rude to not even say thank you, when you went out of your way to bring them food. I can't stand people are ungrateful or have entitlement issues....... and if my family left that i would have washed the cup and clothes before returning them. You never know when you will be able to get that stuff back to someone so why let it sit and ruin. Just saying thats what I would do...
@temmetime wow, super rude of her. I'd probably toss because I'm lazy and frankly don't need one more thing turning my stomach against me at this point.
@temmetime yikes. Not exactly the picture of gratitude you'd expect. Sorry about that. I'd wash/ sanitize both (extra hot water and vinegar). And then I would politely mention it to them, about how this upset you, and you were trying to do them a favor and left your items by mistake, only to have them returned to you still soiled. Or maybe mention it in passing how last time they left something at your house you washed it for them . Maybe they'd get the hint?
@scaredunprepared I am strongly leaning towards tossing them both & if I get the opportunity I'll lightly chuckle & say oh yea thanks - we just tossed them both they were pretty gross after the pee incident! I don't LOVE that sippy anyway because the base of it is too wide to fit in most cup holders..which to me is a serious design flaw. Just what the actual F. Every time I feel like I'm gaining some progress toward a nice relationship with SIL she does or says really stupid shit. She's the same one who started talking crap about her 'friend' because she sent her child to daycare over the summer & she's a teacher... which lead into talking shit about working moms in front of me. How stupid can one be?
First my iphone randomly stopped connecting to cellular or wireless signal so I was without a phone most of the day. One phone call, two trips to Apple, and 12 hours later, I have a new phone. Thankfully still under warranty or I would be without a phone while they fix it.
I had to deal with 3 more layers of beaurocracy on top of the literally more than a dozen people whose I approval I had to get for some minor project.
Then I had to do my GD screening, nearly puked (if you do, you have to repeat the whole thing), and then found out I failed it and have to do the 3 hr.
I am overwhelmed at work and overbooked (again) tomorrow, still feeling reflux-pukey, and my parents (who are wonderful) are arriving late tomorrow night and the house isn’t ready.
Also I have been so busy at work I haven’t had time to keep up here, and the board has totally blown up with activity this week and I even feel overwhelmed about trying to skim or catch up, let alone respond. So my apologies for not being around much this week and not tagging/responding right now.
Man @Katzalia I'm sorry. That's just a sucky day right there. Take a break from whatever you need to, even if it's us I hope you get through tomorrow ok and can have a relaxing weekend.
@Katzalia I’m sorry about your rough week and not passing your GD test. Good luck with the 3 hour! Fx you pass! Enjoy your parents’ visit. Please don’t allow this board to add any stress to your life. It has been crazy this week!
@Katzalia Ugh, I'm so sorry about your crappy day and failing the one hour. I am also similarly unable to keep up w the board right now due to work craziness but I think everyone I should understanding about ebbs and flows due to life stuff.
AFM, work is still crazy and they still haven't replaced anyone who left so I probably won't be able to post much outside of weekends until I wrap in 3 weeks. And, new bitch: found out both my husband's car and my car need about 1k of repairs, each! Not my favorite week! We were planning on replacing one of our cars before baby, but certainly not both and repairing the one we have to keep will take a chunk out of the down payment for the new car, which is already not as large as I had hoped. Ugh.
Thanks @hannelorre I’m anticipating a fun — but maybe not relaxing — weekend.
Thanks @maureenmce I think my board overwhelm is a combination of being way too busy at work to follow/post during the week + so.much.activity on the board this week that I didn’t know where to start jumping back in. I’m sorry to hear things continue to be crazy at work for you too, with no reprieve coming for the duration of the project. And that completely sucks about both cars needing $1k repairs! LA is not exactly a place where you can reasonably function without a reliable car.
Re: Bitchin' - week of 9/2
Bitch number two is, I haven't gained any weight this pregnancy thus far. So I go to my appointment and I've gained 4 pounds. So I'm like cool i guess ill start gaining weight now. I talk to my doctor and before the appointment is over she mentions to me that I need to watch my weight gain. Now I'm confused and I ask her what she means seeing as this is the first weight gain ive had. She tells me she doesn't want to increase my risk of high blood pressure and diabetes and that I should gain no more the 4 pounds by my next appointment. So I left very upset because I felt like at the first sign of weight gain i got a talking to, even though im almost in my third tri and just started to gain weight. I know I'm overweight, that's no secret. Im uber sensitive when it comes to my weight and my body, and I am someone that unfortunately can obsess over it at times. And thankfully this pregnancy I haven't been worried about my weight. Now after one conversation I feel like I'm cycling into that behavior again when I desperately dont want to. Also a pound a week weight gain in pregnancy is normal and healthy. So that whole conversation was very upsetting to me. Side note I actually only gained one pound, I had not number 2d in three days so I was very backed up at that appointment. I had just started to actually go that day, so by the next morning when I weighed id only gained 1 pound not 4. But even if I had I dont think I should have been made to feel bad about it. Anyways I'm sorry if this is all over the place, I just needed to vent.
I'm sorry you are having a hard time. Maybe the VBAC will work out on its own. Just because you didn't go into labour on your own the first time doesn't mean it won't happen this time.. Maybe your body knows what to do now. Keep positive!
As for weight gain, I think that's crazy. 4lb could even be water weight. I know it's harder to let that type of thing go if you are already sensitive to that, but I would just try to brush that off. I mean, eat healthy (get lots of protein and vitamins) and don't let your doctor worry you about 4lb like that..
@runrinserepeat How are you doing today?
@orangecrush29 Man! I guess you have to keep snacks with you, huh?
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
*Rainbow 8/2015*
*Expected Rainbows 12/2018*
*Loss of Twin 5/2018*
@lavenderlisa I'm sorry you had a shitty appointment. As far as the c-section, I'd try not to worry about your body going into labor or not. There's not a lot you can do about it, and worry now just means you're suffering even more. This is very, "do as I say, not as I do" advice, because Lord knows my days are preoccupied with what's going to happen in the next three months, but you might be happier just spending 10 minutes every day envisioning your body going into labor and having the birth you want, and trying to push all the negative thoughts out. As far as the weight, I don't even know what to tell you. I'd probably bring that up as a concern at my next appointment, because there's no reason for you to be worried about your weight gain at this point.
DS: 12/20/16
EDD: 11/29/18
@lavenderlisa I'm so sorry you had such a rough appointment. I don't know anything about VBAC's but from what I do, thats pretty standard procedure to not induce. Sending you good thoughts that you'll be able to go into labor on your own and have your VBAC! As for your doctor's rude comment, big hugs! 4lbs is not a big deal at all and you should be way proud of that!! Hopefully they keep their mouth shut from here on out.
@runrinserepeat sorry you're having such a rough time. Hoping you can at least get some restful sleep.
@lavenderlisa What a bummer you had a crappy appointment today. I think your doctor probably wasn't aware that you hadn't gained weight yet because why else bring up weight gain? And even if you HAD been gaining, 4 lbs is healthy and normal in 4 weeks. Not to mention, my weight can fluctuate more than 4 lbs in one day! I'm sure it was a significant overreaction, keep doing what you've been doing, and don't give it another thought. You've got this!
As for me, ultrasound today went well! Baby looks healthy and active as ever, so that was a relief! She was stubborn but this tech was MUCH better than the last one. Gentler, skilled, and more patient. She thinks we FINALLY got the pictures we needed of baby's heart and hands. Plus I got a bonus profile shot
@scaredunprepared I’m so glad the follow up a/s went well! That must be a huge relief!
Well, I guess we left a sippy cup with powerade/water in it & an outfit that DS peed through while we were there (oops - don't ever forget diapers ya'll, just don't) SIL left a bag in our door yesterday with the STILL WET peed on outfit in a knotted bag & the juice still in the cup. I opened the bag and of course it completely ranked of ammonia. Why the hell would you wait two weeks and give us back dirty things? I didn't even realize we left them there and it just seemed odd & a little rude. If someone leaves something at my house, I return it in good condition.. so I would just think it's common sense to not put a full of pee outfit in a airtight bag & leave the sippy full of anything but water. (Thankfully it wasn't milk)
WWYD? Just toss both? I don't see mold in the sippy, but ....bacteria.
Tell me if I am being a brat.
DS: 12/20/16
EDD: 11/29/18
my MIL or mother would save them. I would throw them out because I'm too lazy to put in the effort to clean them. And what a bitch.
Second of all, I’d wash them both with vinegar and baking soda and they should be good as new!
DS: 12/20/16
EDD: 11/29/18
First my iphone randomly stopped connecting to cellular or wireless signal so I was without a phone most of the day. One phone call, two trips to Apple, and 12 hours later, I have a new phone. Thankfully still under warranty or I would be without a phone while they fix it.
I had to deal with 3 more layers of beaurocracy on top of the literally more than a dozen people whose I approval I had to get for some minor project.
Then I had to do my GD screening, nearly puked (if you do, you have to repeat the whole thing), and then found out I failed it and have to do the 3 hr.
I am overwhelmed at work and overbooked (again) tomorrow, still feeling reflux-pukey, and my parents (who are wonderful) are arriving late tomorrow night and the house isn’t ready.
Also I have been so busy at work I haven’t had time to keep up here, and the board has totally blown up with activity this week and I even feel overwhelmed about trying to skim or catch up, let alone respond. So my apologies for not being around much this week and not tagging/responding right now.
AFM, work is still crazy and they still haven't replaced anyone who left so I probably won't be able to post much outside of weekends until I wrap in 3 weeks. And, new bitch: found out both my husband's car and my car need about 1k of repairs, each!
Thanks @maureenmce I think my board overwhelm is a combination of being way too busy at work to follow/post during the week + so.much.activity on the board this week that I didn’t know where to start jumping back in. I’m sorry to hear things continue to be crazy at work for you too, with no reprieve coming for the duration of the project. And that completely sucks about both cars needing $1k repairs! LA is not exactly a place where you can reasonably function without a reliable car.