My mother passed away a little less than two years ago. My dad has been dating his current girlfriend for about 16 months. I don't really know her well, but I suspect that she and my dad would expect that she would get an invite to my baby shower. I can't see any way around there being drama from one source or another, whether I invite her or not.
I don't have anything against his girlfriend personally, but I would really strongly prefer not to invite her to my baby shower. It's going to be a relatively smallish group (probably less than 20 people), and I feel like anytime I see this woman, it's just going to be a painful reminder that my mom isn't there. Additionally, I think my grandmother and aunt on my mom's side might find her presence a painful reminder as well.
On the flip side, my gram (dad's mom) understands my reasoning, but is fairly confident that me not inviting dad's girlfriend would result in all sorts of drama. It would probably hurt her feelings not to be invited, and I can definitely see my dad getting pissy about it too. It would probably be my gram, brother, and SIL who would bear the brunt of this drama, since they live a lot closer to my dad and see him and the gf much more often.
Yes to hating forced hugs. MIL picked DD up last time she was here to try and get her to cuddle and DD freaked out and yelled and was trying to get out of her arms. MILs response was ‘oh I just saw you give your mommy love so I’m going to steal some’. UHM, NO! If my 1 year old is yelling and wiggling to get away from you, put her down. Do not force affection.
Me: 28 DH: 26 Married: November 2015 TTC#1: January 2016 BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16 BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17 DD Born 06/23/17 TFAS: April 2018 BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19
- 2 showers. One with your dad's side and one with your mom's. (Sorry for your loss) invite a mix of friends to both, you could even do co-ed to include more people.
- not invite her and tell your dad that her presence reminds you too much of the loss of your mom, it's not personal but would appreciate it if they understood. Sometimes honesty is the most effective
- invite your dads girlfriend and expect everyone to act like adults because it's about this baby and you need everyone united.
@AshVA I'm right there with @galactickates, with your three options. If I were in your situation, I would invite her. I can't imagine what it must be like to not have your mom there - something I definitely take for granted, but I'm also one to "keep the peace." I'm sorry for the loss of your mom.
As for touching the belly: I am not a touchy-feely person at all. I don't like kissing people hello or goodbye. I'm always the first one to let go when someone wants to hug. I've been called stoic, but that's just how I trained myself. I've mentioned this before but my MIL touched my stomach twice last pregnancy and I about gagged. She actually rubbed my belly. There was no asking. I was pissed. My mom asked if she could feel my stomach when the baby moves. I reluctantly said yes. I just don't want my stomach rubbed or touched. My husband doesn't even do it unless I tell him the baby is moving, and then I ask him if he wants to feel it. If anyone attempts to touch me, I will kindly ask they don't. I've also learned to place my arm across my belly if someone wants to hug me as to block them. I've also used a cold RBF when all else fails and I feel like a simple no doesn't resonate.
@AshVA gosh that's a tough situation. You wrote you would strongly prefer not to invite her, I say go with that if it's truly what you want. It's your shower hopefully your dad will understand. If people don't understand, too bad. Sounds more harsh than intended. Like you said there may be drama either way, if so you may as well stick to what you want. Hopefully being honest about your reasoning will help soften any hard feelings. My mindset lately has been to be more selfish and true to myself, given my nature that's not as easy as it sounds.
@AshVA I’m sorry for the loss of your mom. And I can definitely see why having your dad’s girlfriend there would be difficult. I agree with the options above with maybe some tweaking of option two.
I think no matter which option you choose, you should have a conversation with your dad and his girlfriend about how you are feeling. Let her know it isn’t anything personal against her, but that sometimes she serves as a reminder that you don’t get to share this with your mom. Maybe offer to do a different thing with the girlfriend if you choose not to invite her to the shower? Maybe mani-pedis and some shopping for the nursery?
married 7.11.09
Me: 31 DH: 36
DD (14) and DS (11) adopted from US Foster care December 2016 BFP April 24, 2018 | EDD December 29, 2018
Thanks @galactickates and @CoastieGirl79. I'd been doing ok for a while, but the pregnancy has definitely brought the pain of not having my mom around back to the forefront. (Side note: if she was still here, I'm sure she would be driving me crazy with the same unsolicited belly touching and baby talking that others have mentioned on this thread)
The two showers option isn't really feasible in my case, as I have few close female relatives on both sides. Even in a single shower, there would probably only be 3-5 blood relatives from both sides combined. Also, my work always throws a big shower for new parents, so the thought of adding a third shower to the mix seems excessive lol
I'm thinking of a middle ground that might involve inviting her, but asking my dad's mom and a few family friends to run interference so that hopefully she and my mom's side of the family don't have to interact much.
ETA: Thanks also to @ers7924 and @DLpanda08. I didn't see your posts before I posted this one.
Found out on Monday that baby 2 is a boy! I had 2 daughters pictured in my head, so I have to mentally adjust a bit, but I'm happy that everything is going well and baby is healthy. I'm already planning on knitting miniature grandpa sweaters. DD is excited about baby brother.
Other news this week - my friend was admitted to L and D today at 35 weeks because of low fluid. They are giving her lots of IV fluids and will check her levels again in the morning. Fingers crossed for higher amniotic levels tomorrow so she can go home.
Re unwanted belly touching - my resting bitch face usually keeps people away, lol.
Re awkward shower situation (@AshVA) - I think your plan sounds good. 3 showers does sound intense, and if you have relatives who will help you run interference then that might work well. Good luck!
Oh, also, I troll the "real questions", too. I feel like most the old drive by type stuff goes there now. Except for the real dedicated knotties who still post drive bys on BMBs.
@AshVA I just wanted to say that I’m so sorry for your loss and what you are feeling is completely understandable. I hope you’re able to work this out with your dad and come up with something that involves the least drama. It’s a tough situation to be in but remember that it’s also really hard on you if you try to make everyone happy. Oftentimes, you are reminded just how unhappy you are in the process and it will wear you out. Hugs.
@luckymay2x I am right there w you. Pictured two girls. Named our second DD only to find out it’s a boy. A week and a half in, I am finally getting around to the idea of having a boy. This is going to be a fun adventure for the both of us! I say that in a good way.
@AshVA I'm so sorry for the loss of your mom. I would invite her because I have a huge guilty conscious and I would feel bad hurting her feelings. I understand your desire not to invite her, but I think it'd be kind to include her if she's part of your dad's life.
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
ALSO the thing where people "force" their kids to give/receive hugs from people. None of that! Learning about consent starts so early.
I HATE this. I remember always having to put up with people hugging me because I got in trouble for being rude if I tried to avoid it. I have made it really clear to my MIL that I don't like hugging/cheek kisses but she always does it anyway. I kind of hate that I put up with it so as not to be seen as rude or bitchy. My in-laws definitely push the hugs and kisses and my DH believes it is very important for DD to give his family hugs and kisses. So far DD is pretty into it so it hasn't been a big issue and I've been able to deflect when she isn't but it is a major source of contention between DH and I.
This is a big deal to me, and luckily DH agrees with me on this. It may be because I was sexually abused as a child by my step-grandpa and I feel like the grooming all started with me feeling pressured not to get in trouble or be rude by turning down hugs that made me uncomfortable. I talked to my family and in-laws about this before our oldest was born. I explained to them that I had no concerns that anyone in our families would abuse my kids, (though frankly, you really never know) but that I felt it was very important for them to know that their personal boundaries would be respected, especially with adults. Because of this, I asked them to please ask before giving hugs or cuddles and to respect it if my kids pulled away or didn’t want to be hugged. And to do so without guilting the child or making the child feel bad. If a child learns that their parents (and ideally other trusted adults) will respect their boundaries and stand up for them and their boundaries to other adults, they will be more likely to feel comfortable and confident asserting their boundaries if they ever are in an unsafe situation, both as a child and as an adult.
@AshVA I’m sorry for the loss of your mom! Losing a parent is always tough, especially when those special moments comes around. Personally, I wouldn’t invite her. It’s your day and you shouldn’t have to worry about your emotions and your families emotions. I do think a conversation with her and your dad may be a good idea to share how you’re feeling. I would also maybe suggest another baby related activity just you and her, maybe some shopping.
This is a big deal to me, and luckily DH agrees with me on this. It may be because I was sexually abused as a child by my step-grandpa and I feel like the grooming all started with me feeling pressured not to get in trouble or be rude by turning down hugs that made me uncomfortable. I talked to my family and in-laws about this before our oldest was born. I explained to them that I had no concerns that anyone in our families would abuse my kids, (though frankly, you really never know) but that I felt it was very important for them to know that their personal boundaries would be respected, especially with adults. Because of this, I asked them to please ask before giving hugs or cuddles and to respect it if my kids pulled away or didn’t want to be hugged. And to do so without guilting the child or making the child feel bad. If a child learns that their parents (and ideally other trusted adults) will respect their boundaries and stand up for them and their boundaries to other adults, they will be more likely to feel comfortable and confident asserting their boundaries if they ever are in an unsafe situation, both as a child and as an adult.
I completely agree. It’s DH’s hill he’s willing to die on despite all my efforts to get him to understand. His family are physical affection = love people so he feels that refusing to hug her grandma means she’s rejecting her. I’ve at least gotten him to respect her boundaries himself, and I can stand up for her when I’m there.
@AshVA sorry for your loss. I can't imagine what it must be like to lose your mom so young. I'm with what others have said.. open conversation with your dad and dad's GF, and maybe do something else to include dad's GF if you end up not inviting her to the shower. Good luck!
On an unrelated note, my good friend is being induced this morning! She really wanted to do a low intervention birthing center, but she is now 42 wks and even the midwives recommended that she be induced. I think she is disappointed to not get the experience she had pictured, but hopefully she has an uncomplicated induction and will get to meet her little boy soon!
@AshVA I'm really sorry for your loss. I'd speak to your dad's gf and who knows, she may be understanding and not require an invite.
It's so bad here they've started voluntary evacuations in some areas and the rain continues for basically the next week. DH just left for a month so I really hope things calm down soon. @kns1988 are y'all ok where you're at?
@ladystout08 Try FlexJobs. You get a free trial, but they have tons of work from home, flex schedule jobs, especially for the tech sector. That is where I found my current work from home job four years ago! My husband has had success with the site too.
@oldiebutgoodie80 I will! Thank you! I did some hunting yesterday and applied for a virtual assistant position that said you can start out with a few hours and work your way up. I was really surprised I could find anything with Dell/HPE/etc.
@ladystout08 Yes! Check it out. And they have some legit jobs there. I am an online teacher, and I have a super flexible full time job. I also do at home test grading.
My 13 month old daughter just keeps staring at the window in our basement crying and saying ‘birdie’. She’s mad that there’s no bird there. There was only ever a bird there one time. When she learned the word birdie. So I guess I know what kind of day today is going to be.
Me: 28 DH: 26 Married: November 2015 TTC#1: January 2016 BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16 BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17 DD Born 06/23/17 TFAS: April 2018 BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19
I'm starting the process of doing my continuing education for one of my professional certifications and it makes me want to poke my eyes out. SO boring and I hate online training.
My 13 month old daughter just keeps staring at the window in our basement crying and saying ‘birdie’. She’s mad that there’s no bird there. There was only ever a bird there one time. When she learned the word birdie. So I guess I know what kind of day today is going to be.
That's so precious! Do you have a fake bird that you can put there to appease her?
@jgil85 oh that’s a good idea. I wish I thought of that. We did look at pictures of different birds on my phone and that seemed to make her a bit happier! We’re going to see my BFF and her 8 month old daughter later so that will make DD happy. She looooves her little friend.
Me: 28 DH: 26 Married: November 2015 TTC#1: January 2016 BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16 BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17 DD Born 06/23/17 TFAS: April 2018 BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19
Had Chipotle for lunch. Stopped by my friend’s to play w her 3 month old. Came home just now to telework and I feel like taking a nap. Soooo sleeeeeepyyyyyy
Oh man, we saw a moth at our neighborhood park once and every single time we went back for like 6 months DD would talk about “moth gone” and we would have to go check to see if it was there. She would even bring up randomly throughout the day. I was so over that stupid moth.
We got confirmation that baby is a boy today and I want to just text everyone, and my mom is coming over today for a bit and I'll tell her in person. DH is like, "what?? Aren't we having individual get togethers with each of our families to tell them??" I don't have the energy or desire right now to do a get together lol
Aside from our parents, i don't mind jsut sending people the pictures or something
I'm a little salty because I'm rolling over an old 401k to my IRA and I have to get a notarized permission slip from my husband giving me consent to move the money. He wasn't even listed as a beneficiary on this account. Meanwhile, my husband is car shopping right now and is able to trade in MY car (I'm the only one on the registration/title) without so much as a signature from me.
@kaf1788 I'm not an ERISA lawyer (thank God), but my very general understanding is that spouses generally have rights in retirement accounts regardless of who the named beneficiaries are. There are probably exceptions to that rule, but it explains the general requirement for a spousal signature acknowledging the move. It works both ways - DH needed my signature when he rolled over a retirement account a few months ago, even though that account predated our marriage and therefore (probably) didn't name me as a beneficiary.
It's so bad here they've started voluntary evacuations in some areas and the rain continues for basically the next week. DH just left for a month so I really hope things calm down soon. @kns1988 are y'all ok where you're at?
The creeks are overflowing at the camp, but we're okay so far. A tree fell down yesterday on the property and knocked the power out for 6 hours, but we have it back now. I hit so many road closures on the way home. It was wild. Also, anyone else live in the country and have to put up with "road closed" signs but no posted detours? You're just supposed to figure out your own way around. It drives me nuts!
Me: 29, DH: 31 Married: October 2014 Began TTC: April 2015 BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w) BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w) BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17 BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
We’ve had 20 days straight of 100+ degree weather with no end in sight. It’s supposed to be 108 tomorrow. And there’s a huge fire burning in the mountains near Yosemite right now sending tons of smoke our way. It’s icky.
Anxiously waiting for my Gap and Old Navy orders to get delivered today! I bought some maternity jeans bc those bella bands did not work last week. My pants kept sliding down and I looked like I was walking around w sh*t in my pants. I am in desperate need for some good mat jeans. Hoping these are it! Will update later.
*SNIP* @snackheart I am a touchy/cuddly person too but this is just too weird when people (family) are already touching my belly! It's hard to separate that desire to understand that our families are excited too with the notion of the fact that no one has the right to touch your body without your consent, even if it's just to rub a pregnant belly. We don't think of consent as extending into this area but it is so important! Similarly, I've read about a lot of parents struggling with people coming right up to their infants and touching them. ALSO the thing where people "force" their kids to give/receive hugs from people. None of that! Learning about consent starts so early. You have every right to shift behaviors/actions you may have let go in previous pregnancies. It can be as simple as saying "hey, I'm don't feel comfortable with that this time around." It won't feel comfortable to say, but by saying something clearly and saying it is how you feel, it's the best you can do. And then you can go back to it if they ignore it/give you issues and talk about how you need your personal space to be respected. Remind yourself it's YOUR body and your pregnancy. AND DON'T FEEL THE NEED TO APOLOGIZE FOR THIS - because you DO NOT!!!! They get to cuddle the kid when it's out of you; you get to control it while it's in you. I would and will say exactly that to anyone whose touch/actions I do not like during my pregnancy. I am sure we're not alone in this!!
Stupid Bump didn't give me a notification that you had tagged me! But I just want to say PREACH and you are so right. Thank you
It's so bad here they've started voluntary evacuations in some areas and the rain continues for basically the next week. DH just left for a month so I really hope things calm down soon. @kns1988 are y'all ok where you're at?
The creeks are overflowing at the camp, but we're okay so far. A tree fell down yesterday on the property and knocked the power out for 6 hours, but we have it back now. I hit so many road closures on the way home. It was wild. Also, anyone else live in the country and have to put up with "road closed" signs but no posted detours? You're just supposed to figure out your own way around. It drives me nuts!
Today the rivers are supposed to crest. They say the main river won't flood so hopefully things will calm down soon. The poor creeks and little side branches of the river just couldn't handle it all. Everything is supposed to start receding by Saturday. FX!
I just lost my mind on my candidates campaign manager. I manage social media content and I have a schedule and a plan for all the content that gets posted. So WHY did he decide to just publish a bunch of stuff I had drafted all at once? Like, do you want my job? Have it.
I just lost my mind on my candidates campaign manager. I manage social media content and I have a schedule and a plan for all the content that gets posted. So WHY did he decide to just publish a bunch of stuff I had drafted all at once? Like, do you want my job? Have it.
That is super annoying!!! Ugh. I don’t blame you at all. I would have lost it too.
Re: Weekly randoms 7/23
My mother passed away a little less than two years ago. My dad has been dating his current girlfriend for about 16 months. I don't really know her well, but I suspect that she and my dad would expect that she would get an invite to my baby shower. I can't see any way around there being drama from one source or another, whether I invite her or not.
I don't have anything against his girlfriend personally, but I would really strongly prefer not to invite her to my baby shower. It's going to be a relatively smallish group (probably less than 20 people), and I feel like anytime I see this woman, it's just going to be a painful reminder that my mom isn't there. Additionally, I think my grandmother and aunt on my mom's side might find her presence a painful reminder as well.
On the flip side, my gram (dad's mom) understands my reasoning, but is fairly confident that me not inviting dad's girlfriend would result in all sorts of drama. It would probably hurt her feelings not to be invited, and I can definitely see my dad getting pissy about it too. It would probably be my gram, brother, and SIL who would bear the brunt of this drama, since they live a lot closer to my dad and see him and the gf much more often.
Thoughts? Advice?
Edit: I can't spell today
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17
DD Born 06/23/17
TFAS: April 2018
BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP
BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19
- 2 showers. One with your dad's side and one with your mom's. (Sorry for your loss) invite a mix of friends to both, you could even do co-ed to include more people.
- not invite her and tell your dad that her presence reminds you too much of the loss of your mom, it's not personal but would appreciate it if they understood. Sometimes honesty is the most effective
- invite your dads girlfriend and expect everyone to act like adults because it's about this baby and you need everyone united.
What does your gut say?
As for touching the belly: I am not a touchy-feely person at all. I don't like kissing people hello or goodbye. I'm always the first one to let go when someone wants to hug. I've been called stoic, but that's just how I trained myself. I've mentioned this before but my MIL touched my stomach twice last pregnancy and I about gagged. She actually rubbed my belly. There was no asking. I was pissed. My mom asked if she could feel my stomach when the baby moves. I reluctantly said yes. I just don't want my stomach rubbed or touched. My husband doesn't even do it unless I tell him the baby is moving, and then I ask him if he wants to feel it. If anyone attempts to touch me, I will kindly ask they don't. I've also learned to place my arm across my belly if someone wants to hug me as to block them. I've also used a cold RBF when all else fails and I feel like a simple no doesn't resonate.
My mindset lately has been to be more selfish and true to myself, given my nature that's not as easy as it sounds.
I think no matter which option you choose, you should have a conversation with your dad and his girlfriend about how you are feeling. Let her know it isn’t anything personal against her, but that sometimes she serves as a reminder that you don’t get to share this with your mom. Maybe offer to do a different thing with the girlfriend if you choose not to invite her to the shower? Maybe mani-pedis and some shopping for the nursery?
BFP April 24, 2018 | EDD December 29, 2018
The two showers option isn't really feasible in my case, as I have few close female relatives on both sides. Even in a single shower, there would probably only be 3-5 blood relatives from both sides combined. Also, my work always throws a big shower for new parents, so the thought of adding a third shower to the mix seems excessive lol
I'm thinking of a middle ground that might involve inviting her, but asking my dad's mom and a few family friends to run interference so that hopefully she and my mom's side of the family don't have to interact much.
ETA: Thanks also to @ers7924 and @DLpanda08. I didn't see your posts before I posted this one.
Other news this week - my friend was admitted to L and D today at 35 weeks because of low fluid. They are giving her lots of IV fluids and will check her levels again in the morning. Fingers crossed for higher amniotic levels tomorrow so she can go home.
Re unwanted belly touching - my resting bitch face usually keeps people away, lol.
Re awkward shower situation (@AshVA) - I think your plan sounds good. 3 showers does sound intense, and if you have relatives who will help you run interference then that might work well. Good luck!
@luckymay2x I am right there w you. Pictured two girls. Named our second DD only to find out it’s a boy. A week and a half in, I am finally getting around to the idea of having a boy. This is going to be a fun adventure for the both of us! I say that in a good way.
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
On an unrelated note, my good friend is being induced this morning! She really wanted to do a low intervention birthing center, but she is now 42 wks and even the midwives recommended that she be induced. I think she is disappointed to not get the experience she had pictured, but hopefully she has an uncomplicated induction and will get to meet her little boy soon!
It's so bad here they've started voluntary evacuations in some areas and the rain continues for basically the next week. DH just left for a month so I really hope things calm down soon. @kns1988 are y'all ok where you're at?
DS 05/29/2013
M/C 02/14/2017
M/C 06/05/2017
C/P 03/01/2018
BFP 05/17/2018 EDD 01/27/2019
DS 05/29/2013
M/C 02/14/2017
M/C 06/05/2017
C/P 03/01/2018
BFP 05/17/2018 EDD 01/27/2019
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17
DD Born 06/23/17
TFAS: April 2018
BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP
BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19
DS 05/29/2013
M/C 02/14/2017
M/C 06/05/2017
C/P 03/01/2018
BFP 05/17/2018 EDD 01/27/2019
Married: November 2015
TTC#1: January 2016
BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17
DD Born 06/23/17
TFAS: April 2018
BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP
BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19
Married: 8/11/2007
DD: Born 2/3/17
BFP#2: 5/3, EDD 1/10/19
The car trade in, however, makes no sense to me.
Married: October 2014
Began TTC: April 2015
BFP #1: 9/18/15. EDD 5/18/16. MC 10/26/15. (9w)
BFP #2: 2/27/16. EDD 11/7/16. MC/D&E 4/20/16 (11w)
BFP #3: 9/22/16. EDD 5/29/17. DS born 4/24/17
BFP #4: 5/20/18. EDD 1/23/19.
Dating: 10/3/08 | Married: 12/27/14
TTC #1: August 2015 | BFP: 2/3/16 | EDD: 10/7/16
DD: 10/5/16
TTC #2: September 2017 | BFP: 4/28/18 | EDD: 1/7/19
DS: 1/9/19
*~* DS Jan.'15 *~* DD Nov.'16 *~*
*~* DS Jan.'15 *~* DD Nov.'16 *~*
DS 05/29/2013
M/C 02/14/2017
M/C 06/05/2017
C/P 03/01/2018
BFP 05/17/2018 EDD 01/27/2019
DS 05/29/2013
M/C 02/14/2017
M/C 06/05/2017
C/P 03/01/2018
BFP 05/17/2018 EDD 01/27/2019