Bookmark this article for after the baby is born. My husband and I both read it numerous times and it helped us help our son adjust after our daughter was born. We will be referring to it again this fall:
I’m worried about being able to be the mom I want to be and dividing my time between three kids. And working.
Im the most worried about how my 5 year old will adjust. My 8 year old son adores babies and is very sensitive. My 5 year daughter is my barnacle and has been the baby for five years. She’s very attention-seeking already. It’s going to be a rough transition.
@iheartbooks my DD was struggling with night time as well until this year. She turned 4 in January and I was just done with the diapers. We had other behaviors we wanted to work on with her, so I made a reward chart with one of the tasks being “Waking up Dry.” She had a few missteps when we first started with the chart, but after she did it one night and got the reward sticker the next morning, it was like it finally clicked and she was dry from that point on. Now I know that won’t work for every child, but hey, it’s always worth a try! It makes me think she was capable, but was almost being lazy about it. I just tried it by chance and it ended up being the last push she needed to be completely diaper free.
@iheartbooks Your doctor is right — night time dryness is hormonal and developmental, NOT something that is trainable. Not something to sweat or stress about, at least!
Does anyone have any advice on how I can get my DD4 to stay in her bed/stay asleep through the whole night? I’m at my wits end. DD used to be such an easy sleeper. I could lay her in her crib/bed and after some books and snuggles and kisses, I could leave the room and she’d fall asleep on her own. The past month has been hell though. She refuses to fall asleep unless I sit outside her door. And then almost every night, she wakes up between 2-4am and comes in our room. We don’t allow her to sleep in our bed, never have, unless she’s sick. She wakes me up, not crying or anything, just taps me. I walk her back to her room and cover her back up and she falls back asleep. The past week she has been doing the 2-4am wake up, and now she’s waking up again at like 630am when she’s used to getting up around 8am. We have one of those clocks that turns green when she is allowed to get out of bed, and she used to follow it, but now she doesn’t pay it any mind. I’ve tried stickers and rewards with it too, and it’s not helping. I’ve tried putting her to bed earlier, later, taking away privileges, offering special rewards, started our nighttime routine earlier.... nothing is helping. It’s like as soon as she wakes up a little in the night she immediately jumps out of bed and runs in to our room. How do I break this habit?!
@pink_polkadots I just dealt with a little regression. My 22 month old is normally an excellent sleeper and for nearly two weeks he was taking a really long time to fall asleep and/or waking up in the middle night.
I tweaked his schedule a little and it solved the problem. The two things I always look into is how much daytime sleep is he getting, and how long is his awake window between nap and bedtime (so he’s not under tired or over tired) Obviously depending on the age this could change, since sleep needs decrease as babies/toddlers get older.
In my situation he was sleeping for 2.5hrs during the day (12:45-3:15) Then bedtime was at 7:45/8. I moved his nap to 1:00pm and wake him up at 3:00pm (even if he’s still sleeping). This way he’s only napping for 2hrs and has a full 5hrs of awake time before bedtime (which is age appropriate for him).
I’m really into learning about sleep/sleep development and very strict with schedules. 30 minutes for us can be the difference between him going to bed really easily and sleeping a full 11hrs at night or having bedtime/nighttime struggles.
Does she still nap during the day? How long is the nap? I would also consider gating her room.
@BabyBoyH92016 she won’t take naps anymore. She used to nap like your son, from 1-3 everyday. But after she turned four, she would just toss and turn in her bed. I try to make sure she gets some quiet down time during the day. Her bedtime has always been 8pm, and she would sleep through til about 730-8am. We had a gate and she would just climb it. Took it down for safety reasons.
@pink_polkadots Hmmm since my son is much younger I’m not familiar with what is developmentally going on with a 4 year old.
Do you think some music would help? We play like 45 minutes of soft soothing music at bedtime. We’ve been doing it since was a baby, and I think it helps him relax.
Ive heard of giving a child one free pass (creating a physical pass) that a child can turn in to you after bedtime for one extra book, song, hug, etc. Once she gets her one “extra” thing that’s it. After that it’s a silent return to sleep. If she leaves her room, you quietly with no extra interaction return her to her bed. You do this over and over. This sounds exhausting to me but it might be worth a try for a few nights. Once she learns that you will not talk/interact with her in any way shape or form, and negotiating is not possible, she may give up.
You can also try a mix of positive and negative reinforcement. She stays in bed, her door stays open, she leaves her room, you return her her bed and the door gets shut. She leaves her room again, you return her to her room and the door gets locked/barricaded. Next evening is a blank slate with door open. I know you said you removed the gate for safety reasons, but look into other options. There are door knob covers, door monkeys, ect... Obviously her room should be completely hazard free. I treat my sons room like a big crib. He has a floor bed and some items that used to be in his crib like his lovely, blanket, and stuffed animal. I leave out one board book. We removed all furniture. He has no toys, and the things I use to change his diaper get put in his closet at bed and nap times. The closet is then locked. It’s low stimulation and boring, and I think that’s also key for him to wind down and fall asleep.
Good luck! You will get back to where you were. I always freak out when we have regressions, but they are completely normal and always end up passing.
@iheartbooks Have you tried putting her in underwear at night time and seeing what happens? Maybe after a few nights of wet sheets she'd learn to get up and go potty while she's sleeping? That might not work at all. Admittedly, we had a pretty easy time night training DD, so I might not be the best to give advice, but it might be worth a shot. If she's not ready, definitely don't push it, but I wonder if she might be capable of it but she just doesn't know it yet. @pink_polkadots We've been dealing with something similar. DD thankfully doesn't wake up in the middle of the night, but she used to fall asleep SO easily and quickly, and the past maybe 6 months or so, she stays up in her room for a long time. I think we kind of made it worse by going up and talking to her and helping her, so we've been trying to be better about saying "sorry, it's bed time, I can't help you." IDK if you're religious at all, but we started praying every night for angels to come keep her company at bed time and she loves it. It seems to help her sleep, at least a little bit. Admittedly, it's a little weird, but...whatever works. Sorry I don't have any advice. I wish I did. @highsteaks We had a very similar experience in a rest stop bathroom during a long road trip in December. It was terrible and DD was crying and I was grouchy and tired, but I just wanted her to pee so bad. Hahaha.
On the potty training topic, agree with everyone else that you can't push potty training. We tried when DD was maybe 2.5 and it was a disaster. Even though she'd shown interest in it and was able to communicate when she had to go to the bathroom, it didn't work at all. We waited a few more months and she took to it really easily after that.
I need advice about birthday parties! DD's 4th birthday party is in mid-August and I'd like to plan a "real" party for her this year. Her last birthday parties have all been very small with just family or few close friends. I'd like to invite some of her school friends because I think she'd really like it, but I'm not sure what to do. Do I have it at our house? We don't have people over very often and it makes me nervous to have a bunch of toddlers running around while trying to entertain them. Anyone have any fun ideas for a 4-year-old? There's a pottery painting place near us that does birthday parties for kids. It's $150 for up to 8 kids. They have story time parties where they paint an item that goes along with a story. That sounds kind of fun! Or maybe a park? I'm terrible at these things and I don't know what to do.
@offtoneverland my mom takes DD and her other 4 granddaughters to paint pottery around Easter every year for an Easter gift. DD loves it! We’ve never done a party but we have been to the one off of Rt. 40 several times. I even took a group of preschoolers there for a field trip a few years ago before I had DD when I was teaching. The kids loved it!
ETA: theres also that new indoor playground off of Snowden River Parkway that does birthday parties. I’m not sure the price, but we’ve been there once and it’s really awesome inside!
@offtoneverland i have heard of a successful 5yr bday party where the family rented out a movie theater (like, one room) and they watched a movie and had popcorn and maybe cupcakes and pizza. it was a smallish local theater so it wasn’t terribly expensive.
@highsteaks That sounds like fun! None of the theaters near me are small though so I'm not sure if they do that. I will definitely look it up though. @pink_polkadots Thanks! I'm leaning towards the pottery painting place. DD loves it there and I bet she'd have so much fun doing it with her friends. However, I'm hesitant for these reasons: 1) The only timeslots they have are 10:30am. Is that too early? 2) It's only 1.5 hours long with 1 hour to paint and 30 minutes for the birthday stuff at the end. Since it's around lunch time, we'd probably need to have lunch, right? Toddlers can't eat lunch and cake in 30 minutes! Would it be lame to just have fun snacks and cake and no lunch? I have no idea what I'm doing.
@offtoneverland Is she a doughnut fan? I’ve seen kid parties in the morning do fun doughnuts! But I think you could totoally do snacks and cake at that time. Little kids probably wouldn’t eat a full lunch and cake in that short of a time.
Thanks everyone for the thoughts on night training. We tried putting her to bed in underwear and she doesn’t even wake up when she pees. I guess I should feel lucky I have such a fantastically deep sleeper? Haha. We have a few months till baby still so maybe her body will magically catch up and the night time pees will stop before baby gets here. I can hope, I guess.
@offtoneverland I have been to so many park parties for DD’s friends (she’s 4) and they’re awesome. Pizza, cake, and the kids can run around and burn off energy without anyone worrying about stuff getting broken. I think it’s perfect! Low stress, and running around is pretty much every 4/5 year ild’s favorite thing anyway, lol!
@offtoneverland The pottery painting sounds like so much fun! Could you have the food there for them to graze on throughout and then do the cake/singing during the final 30? A half hour of entertaining sounds like an eternity to me but I know in reality it speeds by and you’re probably right about it not being sufficient time for both lunch and cake. You could also do a cupcake tower instead of a full cake because it would eliminate the time it takes to cut/plate individual slices!
@runningyogimama OMG I will cry if she’s in diapers until 7. I really shouldn’t complain bc she was a dream to day train but ugh. I’m so over it at this point.
@pink_polkadots oooooh that’s tough. I would probably start by consulting a sleep book for ideas on what is supposed to work. I know everyone is different but it can be a jumping off point. Same with asking the pediatrician. I like a lot of @BabyBoyH92016 ideas, and tbh I would seriously consider a locked door as part of the process. Our bedtime routine has gotten so much longer than it used to be - delay delay delay but eventually we just leave, bedtime is nonnegotiable. Luckily she can’t get out of her room yet, I’m dreading the day when she can.
@offtoneverland I think 1030 is a nice time for 4 year olds. Everyone is usually in a good mood that time of day and almost ready for lunch! I think 1.5h will probably be plenty, it’s hard to keep a group entertained for long. The place might cut and plate the cake for you to save on time. I would think 30 min would work if everything is already plated - ie they sit and sing the song, pizza is served and 20 min layer cake is served. We are doing a big party for DD turning 3 in August! Like you our others have just been family but I wanted to do something special since it’s her last as an only child. We are just doing out backyard though - hopefully the weather holds or idk what’s gonna happen!
@offtoneverland 10:30 is perfect! Some of her guests will still be nappers, so this gives gem a chance to come to the whole party too. We did DD’s 4 year old party and our house and it was great. We have a big yard, sonthe kids ran wild in our playhouse. We also hired Wonder Woman to come and do a superhero training class. Kids loved it and it was cheaper than renting a place out. We served pizza and lots of snacks. Have fun planning and don’t stress! She will feel special having all her friends celebrating her.
Thank you everyone for your help and advice! I was getting really confused trying to figure out what to do. I have a whole new skill to learn now that DD is old enough to have real parties. We thought about having it at our house, but I've heard a ton of parents say it's so much easier to have it elsewhere so you don't have to worry about cleaning up or having toddlers break things. Haha. @wannaflickone I love your idea of hiring Wonder Woman! DD would LOVE that. I'll have to see what's available in our area. @lifesabeach85 I didn't think about how it's her last birthday as an only child. I think it's a great idea to have a big, fun party so they feel super duper special. @runningyogimama Doughnuts are a great idea too! Thanks!
I'm a little concerned about DD not wanting a new baby but we're trying to just ease her into it I guess. I mean, he's coming no matter what lol. We talk about her baby brother in my belly and I show her clothes for him. I'm also going to have her baby brother give her a gift when he's born and vice versa. And I'm going to buy a big sister book.
Friends of ours gave us a crib and dresser that we're going to use for the baby. I was originally going to move DD to a big girl bed but now I'm kind of glad she doesn't HAVE to give up her crib. She still uses pacifiers at night and last night I suggested giving them to the baby and she was not keen on that idea lol. She's mostly potty trained and that recently happened so I don't want to rush the pacifier thing quite yet.
We have a weird situation with DD's old crib and her big girl bed. Her crib is the only thing set up in the nursery right across the hall from her bedroom; it is also the only place she will nap. At night she goes to sleep no problem in her bedroom but for nap time, forget it. She will only sleep in the crib in the nursery. So far I haven't done much to transition her back to nap times in her room but I suppose I better hurry up.
I'm also dreading having to take her paci away next month when she turns 3. We only allow it at sleep times but her dentist said it's starting to affect her teeth and that 3 is the latest she should be allowed to have it. We've tried weaning her off of it in the past but nothing ever stuck. I'm in awe of toddlers who just lose interest if you poke a hole in the paci nipple. DD got pissed when we did that
We have a weird situation with DD's old crib and her big girl bed. Her crib is the only thing set up in the nursery right across the hall from her bedroom; it is also the only place she will nap. At night she goes to sleep no problem in her bedroom but for nap time, forget it. She will only sleep in the crib in the nursery. So far I haven't done much to transition her back to nap times in her room but I suppose I better hurry up.
I'm also dreading having to take her paci away next month when she turns 3. We only allow it at sleep times but her dentist said it's starting to affect her teeth and that 3 is the latest she should be allowed to have it. We've tried weaning her off of it in the past but nothing ever stuck. I'm in awe of toddlers who just lose interest if you poke a hole in the paci nipple. DD got pissed when we did that
Ha, we were one of those lucky ones I guess. Shortly after DS's 2nd birthday we cut the tip off his pacifiers and showed him. His heartbroken face was so sad and he said "bwoken?" teared up and that was the end of that.
*TW*
Me:35 DH:35 Dx: PCOS DS1 born 11/2014 DS2 born 11/2018 3 previous losses Rainbow babydue 12/2021 - Team Green
@MouseMama817 Do you have a toddler rail or something that will make her bed feel more enclosed? A travel crib that you could put in her room for nap time? Will new baby be in a bassinet for a while? I'm such a nap time stickler I feel your concern.
Not a question but I had to take DD to my dr appt today and I was worried it was going to be a disaster but she behaved really well and was so excited to hear the baby’s heartbeat!
@MouseMama817 DD was OBSESSED with her paci and we dreaded taking it away when she turned 3. (Or was it 2? It seems like so long ago, I can't remember.) We had already planned a weekend away at the beach where we were staying at a hotel, so we decided on a whim to just leave the paci at home. I thought it would be a disaster, but we tired her out at the beach and kept her up really late, so by the time we got back to the hotel, she passed out in bed and didn't even ask for a paci. She honestly never asked about it again after that, except a few times when she saw another kid with a paci, but she never threw a fit about it. Maybe you could plan some sort of trip out of the house, or at least try to get her REALLY tired out before you try taking away the paci again. I'm not sure if we just had amazing luck or what, but it worked.
I never really felt the “nesting” urge with either or my prior pregnancies, and I don’t think I’d bought anything by this point with DD1 (with DD2, didn’t need anything other than an extra crib since they were almost exactly a year apart, haha). But this time, I’ve been nesting like CRAZY! Like I’ve been getting rid of stuff around the house left and right for months, sold almost all of the baby and toddler girl clothes between a garage sale and listing on FB the last 2 weeks, and I’ve also already bought (second hand) everything we need in NB and 0-3 month size, including sleep sacks/swaddles, zutano booties,and a coming home outfit, all for well under $100. I just feel like I need to get things done before the school year starts for DD1, because then I’m sure time will fly!
She had my pregnancy pillow for a long time in her bed and I know that made her feel closed in. She would still hop right out of bed at naptimes. I think because her toys are in her room (we don’t have space for a playroom) and she knows it’s daytime. There are strangely no windows in the nursery so it’s totally pitch black. Her bedroom has blackout curtains but she’s not fooled. I could try putting the pack n play in there and see how that works out. LO will be in our room for at least several weeks so it’s not like I have to hurry to transition DD by November, I’m just so nervous that I’ll have zero capacity for parenting a toddler while sleep deprived. @offtoneverland That’s almost too good to be true! We are taking her to Disney for her birthday so that should tire her out pretty well. I’m going to try taking it away at nap time to start and hopefully by next month she’ll let it go more easily.
does anyone have any experiences about montessori schools that they care to rant/rave about? we are making the decision on where to send dd to preschool soon, and while i was initially ready to write off the montessori option, i actually felt like it was a better fit than anticipated when we toured this morning. but i don’t fully understand the benefits/downfall of that kind of experience, so not sure if it’s worth the extra cost and inconveniences.
@highsteaks I'm going to come at this from an "academic" level. I have a background in early childhood development and Montessori is probably thebest option for preschoolers. The main reason is that they met a child where they are at. They examine how the child learns. Most preschoolers are kinetic learners, meaning they learn through movement. Montessori supported that and encourages a child to learn at their pace and in the way they learn. Traditional classrooms tend to put to much structure in preschool classrooms. It's a huge debate among developmental psychologists of the best way for children to learn, etc. Montessori allows a child to express themselves while still following a loose structure. They still learn what they need to, but at their own pace and in their way. This allows them to come and appreciate learning and tends to provide an overall better experience for them as they grow. I. E. They seem to enjoy school and learning as well as do better.
I'm not disparaging traditional preschools, they are great too. I'm saying in my experience, working with kids from birth to 5, those that were allowed to learn in their own way and their own time, tended to be much happier and more adjusted. I dunno if any of that made any sense, it's a bit to put it all in writing, when most of it isn't something that can be quantified.
@wildrainbow thank you so much for taking the time to explain all that. i have to relay everything to my dh tonight, and that’s a really good concise way to explain the program and benefits.
@highsteaks I don’t have first hand experience yet, but my son is signed up for preschool in the fall at a Montessori school. I based my decision on my sons personality. He is very task oriented, so I think he would enjoy doing the “work” stations they have set up vs free play. Personality aside, I like that they focus on learning everyday basic skills (this will be helpful when Baby comes). Also, he is super high energy (like doesn’t stop moving...ever) and I like that Montessori is less stimulating then the play based schools we visited. Not that stimulation is bad, but i think he personally would benefit from a calmer environment. We took a parent/tot class at the Montessori school over the winter and spring, and I was surprised to see that he did have calmer demeanor.
As @highsteaks pointed out, they meet the child where they are at. Not only will my child be the youngest in his class, he is also slightly speech delayed so I was concerned about the structure and expectations of a traditional preschool. My speech therapist was really happy when she found out we were sending him to Montessori, and thought it was the best fit for him.
He will be two in September, and after the twos classroom the classes are mixed in age. I wasn’t sure how I felt about this, but I got a chance to sit in on the mixed classrooms as well, and it wasn’t segregated by age or chaotic like I expected. The children were socializing regardless of age. Their theory is that is more like the real world. Most of the time siblings are different ages and out in the real world you are among people of different ages. The littles really look up to the older children and want to learn from them, and the older kids have a responsibility to be mentors to the little ones. This builds their confidence. Since my son is my first, I think this will also benefit him since he will have the responsibility of being a big brother.
Montessori is very intriguing to me, so I decided to go for it, as I felt it really will fit my sons personality best. I will see how the first year goes and reevaluate if it’s something I want to continue.
Any tips on natural diuretics other than prune juice? DD hasn’t pooped in three days (her first time in the preceding three) and it was small. Green vegetables are unlikely also.
I have a call into the pediatrician but it’s saturday so who knows when I’ll hear back.
@BabyBoyH92016 sorry for taking too long to thank you for writing out your response to my montessori, but i did read out what you and @wildrainbow said that night to my dh, and i think you both were really helpful to convince him. thank you!
@lifesabeach85 dd doesn’t like prune juice either, but she loves to eat prunes (that i slice into bite size pieces). when i had to take dd to the pedi for her constipation, the doc said to increase water, decrease milk, get her to eat apples with the skin on, limit cheeses and rice. also, coconut water (not coconut milk) is suppose to be a helpful diuretic. if she won’t drink it straight up, then maybe mixing it into a smoothie or making popcicles? that’s all i got.
@lifesabeach85 I once mixed in a powder probiotic into my sons milk and that did the job too well. We really didn’t use it after that, but next time I would try half the amount or maybe even a quarter.
@BabyBoyH92016 my experience with night training was that she was potty trained for so long but always wet in the morning. I kind of thought it would just happen but it wasn’t so at 3 I decided to night train. I read “oh crap” and followed that method. I took away the diapers and got up to put her on the potty at certain times during the night. She had an accident one time but t helped me figure out when she was going. After about a week the time got close enough to morning that I let her go all night and she made it. We haven’t had accidents since and she rarely wakes up asking to go potty. I also limited fluids towards bedtime(the book talks more about that’s)
I'm curious about people’s plans with their older children when we go into labor. My family is 2-3 hours away. Between the grandparents, someone can probably come and might even plan on coming my due date week because it’s thanksgiving week. The birth center is 30 min away. We have friends, but no offers so far except a friend 40 minutes away. I could bring her but she’s so high maintenance I don’t want to take care of her while in labor. What about the middle of the night, how will you or how did you plan for this? Also, I had a 3 day labor last time so it might be a big ask for someone to watch her.
Re: STM+ Chat - Month of July
https://www.janetlansbury.com/2013/04/helping-kids-adjust-to-life-with-the-new-baby/
Im the most worried about how my 5 year old will adjust. My 8 year old son adores babies and is very sensitive. My 5 year daughter is my barnacle and has been the baby for five years. She’s very attention-seeking already. It’s going to be a rough transition.
I tweaked his schedule a little and it solved the problem. The two things I always look into is how much daytime sleep is he getting, and how long is his awake window between nap and bedtime (so he’s not under tired or over tired) Obviously depending on the age this could change, since sleep needs decrease as babies/toddlers get older.
In my situation he was sleeping for 2.5hrs during the day (12:45-3:15) Then bedtime was at 7:45/8. I moved his nap to 1:00pm and wake him up at 3:00pm (even if he’s still sleeping). This way he’s only napping for 2hrs and has a full 5hrs of awake time before bedtime (which is age appropriate for him).
I’m really into learning about sleep/sleep development and very strict with schedules. 30 minutes for us can be the difference between him going to bed really easily and sleeping a full 11hrs at night or having bedtime/nighttime struggles.
Does she still nap during the day? How long is the nap? I would also consider gating her room.
Do you think some music would help? We play like 45 minutes of soft soothing music at bedtime. We’ve been doing it since was a baby, and I think it helps him relax.
Ive heard of giving a child one free pass (creating a physical pass) that a child can turn in to you after bedtime for one extra book, song, hug, etc. Once she gets her one “extra” thing that’s it. After that it’s a silent return to sleep. If she leaves her room, you quietly with no extra interaction return her to her bed. You do this over and over. This sounds exhausting to me but it might be worth a try for a few nights. Once she learns that you will not talk/interact with her in any way shape or form, and negotiating is not possible, she may give up.
You can also try a mix of positive and negative reinforcement. She stays in bed, her door stays open, she leaves her room, you return her her bed and the door gets shut. She leaves her room again, you return her to her room and the door gets locked/barricaded. Next evening is a blank slate with door open. I know you said you removed the gate for safety reasons, but look into other options. There are door knob covers, door monkeys, ect... Obviously her room should be completely hazard free. I treat my sons room like a big crib. He has a floor bed and some items that used to be in his crib like his lovely, blanket, and stuffed animal. I leave out one board book. We removed all furniture. He has no toys, and the things I use to change his diaper get put in his closet at bed and nap times. The closet is then locked. It’s low stimulation and boring, and I think that’s also key for him to wind down and fall asleep.
Good luck! You will get back to where you were. I always freak out when we have regressions, but they are completely normal and always end up passing.
@pink_polkadots We've been dealing with something similar. DD thankfully doesn't wake up in the middle of the night, but she used to fall asleep SO easily and quickly, and the past maybe 6 months or so, she stays up in her room for a long time. I think we kind of made it worse by going up and talking to her and helping her, so we've been trying to be better about saying "sorry, it's bed time, I can't help you." IDK if you're religious at all, but we started praying every night for angels to come keep her company at bed time and she loves it. It seems to help her sleep, at least a little bit. Admittedly, it's a little weird, but...whatever works. Sorry I don't have any advice.
@highsteaks We had a very similar experience in a rest stop bathroom during a long road trip in December. It was terrible and DD was crying and I was grouchy and tired, but I just wanted her to pee so bad. Hahaha.
On the potty training topic, agree with everyone else that you can't push potty training. We tried when DD was maybe 2.5 and it was a disaster. Even though she'd shown interest in it and was able to communicate when she had to go to the bathroom, it didn't work at all. We waited a few more months and she took to it really easily after that.
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018
There's a pottery painting place near us that does birthday parties for kids. It's $150 for up to 8 kids. They have story time parties where they paint an item that goes along with a story. That sounds kind of fun! Or maybe a park? I'm terrible at these things and I don't know what to do.
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018
ETA:
theres also that new indoor playground off of Snowden River Parkway that does birthday parties. I’m not sure the price, but we’ve been there once and it’s really awesome inside!
@pink_polkadots Thanks! I'm leaning towards the pottery painting place. DD loves it there and I bet she'd have so much fun doing it with her friends. However, I'm hesitant for these reasons: 1) The only timeslots they have are 10:30am. Is that too early? 2) It's only 1.5 hours long with 1 hour to paint and 30 minutes for the birthday stuff at the end. Since it's around lunch time, we'd probably need to have lunch, right? Toddlers can't eat lunch and cake in 30 minutes! Would it be lame to just have fun snacks and cake and no lunch?
I have no idea what I'm doing.
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018
@offtoneverland The pottery painting sounds like so much fun! Could you have the food there for them to graze on throughout and then do the cake/singing during the final 30? A half hour of entertaining sounds like an eternity to me but I know in reality it speeds by and you’re probably right about it not being sufficient time for both lunch and cake. You could also do a cupcake tower instead of a full cake because it would eliminate the time it takes to cut/plate individual slices!
@offtoneverland I think 1030 is a nice time for 4 year olds. Everyone is usually in a good mood that time of day and almost ready for lunch! I think 1.5h will probably be plenty, it’s hard to keep a group entertained for long. The place might cut and plate the cake for you to save on time. I would think 30 min would work if everything is already plated - ie they sit and sing the song, pizza is served and 20 min layer cake is served. We are doing a big party for DD turning 3 in August! Like you our others have just been family but I wanted to do something special since it’s her last as an only child. We are just doing out backyard though - hopefully the weather holds or idk what’s gonna happen!
@wannaflickone I love your idea of hiring Wonder Woman! DD would LOVE that. I'll have to see what's available in our area.
@lifesabeach85 I didn't think about how it's her last birthday as an only child. I think it's a great idea to have a big, fun party so they feel super duper special.
@runningyogimama Doughnuts are a great idea too! Thanks!
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018
I'm also dreading having to take her paci away next month when she turns 3. We only allow it at sleep times but her dentist said it's starting to affect her teeth and that 3 is the latest she should be allowed to have it.
Dx: PCOS
DS1 born 11/2014
DS2 born 11/2018
3 previous losses
Rainbow baby due 12/2021 - Team Green
Maybe you could plan some sort of trip out of the house, or at least try to get her REALLY tired out before you try taking away the paci again. I'm not sure if we just had amazing luck or what, but it worked.
DD1: 8/2014
TTC #2: 6/2017
BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!
DD2: 10/2018
LO will be in our room for at least several weeks so it’s not like I have to hurry to transition DD by November, I’m just so nervous that I’ll have zero capacity for parenting a toddler while sleep deprived.
@offtoneverland That’s almost too good to be true! We are taking her to Disney for her birthday so that should tire her out pretty well. I’m going to try taking it away at nap time to start and hopefully by next month she’ll let it go more easily.
I'm not disparaging traditional preschools, they are great too. I'm saying in my experience, working with kids from birth to 5, those that were allowed to learn in their own way and their own time, tended to be much happier and more adjusted. I dunno if any of that made any sense, it's a bit to put it all in writing, when most of it isn't something that can be quantified.
As @highsteaks pointed out, they meet the child where they are at. Not only will my child be the youngest in his class, he is also slightly speech delayed so I was concerned about the structure and expectations of a traditional preschool. My speech therapist was really happy when she found out we were sending him to Montessori, and thought it was the best fit for him.
He will be two in September, and after the twos classroom the classes are mixed in age. I wasn’t sure how I felt about this, but I got a chance to sit in on the mixed classrooms as well, and it wasn’t segregated by age or chaotic like I expected. The children were socializing regardless of age. Their theory is that is more like the real world. Most of the time siblings are different ages and out in the real world you are among people of different ages. The littles really look up to the older children and want to learn from them, and the older kids have a responsibility to be mentors to the little ones. This builds their confidence. Since my son is my first, I think this will also benefit him since he will have the responsibility of being a big brother.
Montessori is very intriguing to me, so I decided to go for it, as I felt it really will fit my sons personality best. I will see how the first year goes and reevaluate if it’s something I want to continue.
I have a call into the pediatrician but it’s saturday so who knows when I’ll hear back.
@lifesabeach85 dd doesn’t like prune juice either, but she loves to eat prunes (that i slice into bite size pieces). when i had to take dd to the pedi for her constipation, the doc said to increase water, decrease milk, get her to eat apples with the skin on, limit cheeses and rice. also, coconut water (not coconut milk) is suppose to be a helpful diuretic. if she won’t drink it straight up, then maybe mixing it into a smoothie or making popcicles? that’s all i got.
I'm curious about people’s plans with their older children when we go into labor. My family is 2-3 hours away. Between the grandparents, someone can probably come and might even plan on coming my due date week because it’s thanksgiving week. The birth center is 30 min away. We have friends, but no offers so far except a friend 40 minutes away. I could bring her but she’s so high maintenance I don’t want to take care of her while in labor. What about the middle of the night, how will you or how did you plan for this? Also, I had a 3 day labor last time so it might be a big ask for someone to watch her.