Between my siblings and I, we were baptized into different religions based on the time of my mom's life we were born. I was baptized Methodist as my family was actively involved in a Methodist church (which my grandma still is). Growing up we went to different churches, mostly Baptist due to my mom's first husband. My "older" sister was baptized Baptist around 12 or so, when she chose to be. My mom converted to Catholicism when she married my step-dad, and my 2 siblings from that marriage were baptized Catholic.
"Parents may choose a person or persons to serve as a godparent. However, godparents are not required in The United Methodist Church.
The United Methodist Book of Discipline uses the term "godparent" along with the word "sponsor" and does so because in different regions and different churches one or the other of the terms is familiar and comfortable. Both derive from the ancient practice of the church of a mature, reliable Christian serving as a mentor and encourager of persons coming into the Christian life in baptism, whether adult or child. In all infant baptisms, the parents or other family member serve as the primary sponsor, and in many churches another Christian or two are named as "godparents" - sponsors and encouragers for the child. In the case of adults, the sponsor walks with the person on a journey of conversion, until the day they are baptized - perhaps weeks or months after having learned and experienced the way Christians live and think. When it is a child or infant, the sponsor/godparent and the parents walk with the child on a journey of conversion until they claim the way of Christ as his or her own at confirmation or some other profession of faith."
I grew up Methodist and was baptized as a baby but have no godparents. MH didn’t think we should baptize babies and they should be baptized when they are old enough to know what it means. It was chaos with new twins who didn’t sleep for months so I never fought for it. We also didn’t belong to church, nor attend and I didn’t want them baptized in the same church I was because of some things the pastor had said that made me stop going to begin with (because it was pretty hateful and definitely not what the Bible teaches about loving your neighbor). Since then we have found a new church, and they don’t baptize babies. I was a bit upset about it for a while, but after seeing people that were baptized as babies get baptized again and they all said they wanted to make the choice for themselves instead of something their parents decided, I feel better about not baptizing them.
Several denominations do God Parents, I know Methodist do. However, I know in Catholicism you have to be Catholic to be named a God Parent in a Catholic baptism. I don't think it matters for Methodist. I think you just have to promise to help raise the child to follow God.
Actually only one God Parent must be Catholic. Both must be Christian and baptized themselves, but only one must be a "Catholic in good standing"
The godparent thing was a major source of stress for a while but finally we got it worked out, which is great.
I am Catholic, DH is Episcopalian, but not very religious so we're baptizing the baby in the Catholic church. We're not super religious but it's a sacrament I feel strongly about giving our baby. We're also both only children, so we don't have any siblings and don't really have strong relationships with any extended family.
DH chose his best friend to the godfather, and while he was raised Catholic, has since become an Atheist. I think it's fine because to us the godparent's role is more like a mentor in baby's life instead of a strictly religious role, and his friend's lifestyle is very different from ours so giving our LO an alternate perspective and an opportunity to question what faith means to him and what he believes is an important opportunity for him.
I asked my best friend to be the godmother, we've been friends since middle school and I was the maid of honor in her wedding, and it just felt right. She is much more traditional and will be the one to stand up in the ceremony in the church (you only need one practicing Catholic in good standing for the ceremony). We will invite DH's friend to attend the ceremony if he'd like to, but I don't want to pressure him into being involved with something he's not comfortable with.
For both we met with our friends individually and asked, super casual, no real gifts or anything. I'm so relieved both accepted because honestly if it wasn't for them I have no idea who we would end up asking.
As far as legal guardianship, that's something I can't even think about for more than 5 minutes without feeling panicky. We are not assuming the godparents would be the legal guardians and have made it clear to them when asking.
Several denominations do God Parents, I know Methodist do. However, I know in Catholicism you have to be Catholic to be named a God Parent in a Catholic baptism. I don't think it matters for Methodist. I think you just have to promise to help raise the child to follow God.
Actually only one God Parent must be Catholic. Both must be Christian and baptized themselves, but only one must be a "Catholic in good standing"
Thanks for the clarification. I don't think my parents looked into non-Catholic god parent options when my siblings were baptized.
Me: 35 DH: 34 Married 07/2012 DD born 07/2014 DD2 born 10/2018 DS born 10/2022
IF history: TTC #2 since January 2016 June-Aug 2017: 3 IUIs w/Clomid = BFN Sept 2017: Dx w/Endometriosis Oct 2017: IUI w/Letrozole = BFN Nov 2017: IUI w/Letrozole = BFN Dec 2017: pre-IVF testing Jan-Feb 2018: IVF--17 eggs retrieved, 13 fertilized, 9 frozen and 1 transferred on 2/10 = BFP on 2/19!!! EDD 10/29/2018 FET Oct 2021: BFP on 10/31! MC at 5 weeks FET Feb 2022: BFP on 2/15! EDD 10/29/22
I was raised Catholic but haven't been religious in many years. My H is not religious in the slightest. We didn't pick godparents or baptize DD and won't for this baby either. Surprisingly we got no push back from my religious family.
As far as guardians, we haven't talked about it at all and don't have written wills. That's one thing that I completely forgot about until this discussion. Looks like I'll need to get on that. Pretty sure we would leave both kids to my little brother. We are super close and he is one of my best friends. DD absolutely loves him, too.
@SawyerRichardson I was kinda surprised my mom was okay when I told her this baby won't be baptized. she reminded me my sister wasn't until she was older and agreed with my reasoning (DH isn't religious and we do not attend a church.) I think it'd be difficult for me to get DH to go to church for a baptism. I couldn't get him to go for my siblings first communion.
We're both Christian though H was raised Catholic. We didn't baptize DS because life was chaotic. By the time we figured things out we had left that church and joined another. I have nothing against the first church, just veered in a way I didn't want to go and has been growing as lot over the last 5-10 yrs. I was missing the small church feel. The one we joined is an offshoot of my other and is just starting. So I don't think they've even thought about baptisms yet. I wouldn't mind baptizing both, but I see it more as a commitment on MY/OUR part to raise them to know God. They have to make their own decisions later, which is when they would choose to get baptized on thier own.
Eta: so we likely wouldn't choose anyone. It's about our commitment.
@sammierose464 - I guess I am weird then... I was baptized Methodist, but as far as I am aware, I do not have godparents. I honestly don’t remember it being a thing at our church, but it is worth noting that I stopped attending when I was 12 or so.
@knottieamusements I *thought* I didn’t have godparents too buuuuut fun story - my mom had me secretly christened as a baby because she was Christian and my dad was Jewish and she didn’t think he’d understand (and thought he’d want a Jewish naming ceremony if she got to do a christening and she didn’t want to do that because I wasn’t being raised Jewish). So I had a big christening and party and everything thrown by my mom. And my dad always worked weekends growing up (plus my mom told everyone it “wasn’t his thing”) so there were no questions even asked about his lack of attendance! I just found out about all this a few years ago and my dad still has no idea. #familyinsanity haha
Me: 33 DH: 31 Location: Castle Rock, CO DD: 10.13.18 baby #2 due: 7.14.20
We gave my brother and his gf shirts today, his had Cosmo and hers had Wanda from The Fairly Odd Parents and waited till the figured it out. Emily looked at it and smiled saying "I don't get it" my brother said "its because we're the fairy God parents" and she screamed lol his next question was "which one do we get" it was fun and I'm glad they're both so excited about it!!
Re: God Parents?
So we're a weird hodgepodge!
"Parents may choose a person or persons to serve as a godparent. However, godparents are not required in The United Methodist Church.
The United Methodist Book of Discipline uses the term "godparent" along with the word "sponsor" and does so because in different regions and different churches one or the other of the terms is familiar and comfortable. Both derive from the ancient practice of the church of a mature, reliable Christian serving as a mentor and encourager of persons coming into the Christian life in baptism, whether adult or child. In all infant baptisms, the parents or other family member serve as the primary sponsor, and in many churches another Christian or two are named as "godparents" - sponsors and encouragers for the child. In the case of adults, the sponsor walks with the person on a journey of conversion, until the day they are baptized - perhaps weeks or months after having learned and experienced the way Christians live and think. When it is a child or infant, the sponsor/godparent and the parents walk with the child on a journey of conversion until they claim the way of Christ as his or her own at confirmation or some other profession of faith."
https://www.umc.org/what-we-believe/do-i-have-to-choose-godparents-when-i-have-my-child-baptized
I am Catholic, DH is Episcopalian, but not very religious so we're baptizing the baby in the Catholic church. We're not super religious but it's a sacrament I feel strongly about giving our baby. We're also both only children, so we don't have any siblings and don't really have strong relationships with any extended family.
DH chose his best friend to the godfather, and while he was raised Catholic, has since become an Atheist. I think it's fine because to us the godparent's role is more like a mentor in baby's life instead of a strictly religious role, and his friend's lifestyle is very different from ours so giving our LO an alternate perspective and an opportunity to question what faith means to him and what he believes is an important opportunity for him.
I asked my best friend to be the godmother, we've been friends since middle school and I was the maid of honor in her wedding, and it just felt right. She is much more traditional and will be the one to stand up in the ceremony in the church (you only need one practicing Catholic in good standing for the ceremony). We will invite DH's friend to attend the ceremony if he'd like to, but I don't want to pressure him into being involved with something he's not comfortable with.
For both we met with our friends individually and asked, super casual, no real gifts or anything. I'm so relieved both accepted because honestly if it wasn't for them I have no idea who we would end up asking.
As far as legal guardianship, that's something I can't even think about for more than 5 minutes without feeling panicky. We are not assuming the godparents would be the legal guardians and have made it clear to them when asking.
Married 07/2012
DD born 07/2014
DD2 born 10/2018
DS born 10/2022
IF history:
TTC #2 since January 2016
June-Aug 2017: 3 IUIs w/Clomid = BFN
Sept 2017: Dx w/Endometriosis
Oct 2017: IUI w/Letrozole = BFN
Nov 2017: IUI w/Letrozole = BFN
Dec 2017: pre-IVF testing
Jan-Feb 2018: IVF--17 eggs retrieved, 13 fertilized, 9 frozen and 1 transferred on 2/10 = BFP on 2/19!!! EDD 10/29/2018
FET Oct 2021: BFP on 10/31! MC at 5 weeks
FET Feb 2022: BFP on 2/15! EDD 10/29/22
As far as guardians, we haven't talked about it at all and don't have written wills. That's one thing that I completely forgot about until this discussion. Looks like I'll need to get on that. Pretty sure we would leave both kids to my little brother. We are super close and he is one of my best friends. DD absolutely loves him, too.
I wouldn't mind baptizing both, but I see it more as a commitment on MY/OUR part to raise them to know God. They have to make their own decisions later, which is when they would choose to get baptized on thier own.
Eta: so we likely wouldn't choose anyone. It's about our commitment.
Me: 33 DH: 31
Location: Castle Rock, CO
DD: 10.13.18
baby #2 due: 7.14.20