STM+ thread w/o 4/9 - Page 3 — The Bump
September 2018 Moms

STM+ thread w/o 4/9

13

Re: STM+ thread w/o 4/9

  • We don’t do showers at all. I was shocked at how many gifts we received after DS was born. I expected nothing. DD got gifted quite a few nice things but we just purchased everything else we needed ourselves. We also equaled out their savings accounts because we were able to (they are small sums) and that’s added into our list of to do for baby. I can’t tell you not to have a second shower but I can tell you I probably wouldn’t attend one. 
    spottedgingerDanyTargaryen
  • shaybug12 said:
    I am going to exchange an old car seat for a coupon at Target this weekend for a double stroller. Anyone have one they recommend (my little girl will be 3 in September)?
    I'm looking at the contours options tandem. It's more affordable than the city select ... which I'd love but don't have $1200 laying around. 
    shaybug12
  • edited April 2018
    shaybug12 said:
    I am going to exchange an old car seat for a coupon at Target this weekend for a double stroller. Anyone have one they recommend (my little girl will be 3 in September)?
    I'm looking at the contours options tandem. It's more affordable than the city select ... which I'd love but don't have $1200 laying around. 
    Same. Unfortunately I have to go out of town to a Buy Buy Baby to try one out first, though. I did get an email from them about the Joovy Qool, which looks awesome, but is closer to City Select pricing. 

    @mrsman2018 The City Select (2016 version, though) is only $575 on Amazon including the second seat. I would scoop it up, but I’ve heard the Contours has more leg room, and DS is giant at 13 months. Of course, that doesn’t count the add ons you inevitably have to buy...the CO has add ons as well that I plan to buy (snack trays and Chicco adapter)...
    which is why I’m going to BBB to try them out myself. If the CS is worth the extra dough by my opinion and not too confining, Amazon has been running this deal periodically and I’ll ask them to price match or just order it through them. 
    shaybug12
  • Ugh. Pretty sure DS has conjunctivitis, not sure of the cause though. He's had a cold for a week and a half with on and off yellow/green snot, so I'm kind of leaning toward allergy related. He's off from daycare this week so I'm not worried about that, but can't decide if this is urgent enough to go to urgent care or if it can wait until Tuesday when I can get him to the doctors.... if anyone has any persuasive advice I'd appreciate it!

  • @nlc8424 I'm an NP, and I work in a hospital with adults only where I seldom have ever treat conjunctivitis. However, in basic peds/primary training that I took, the principle differences between allergic/viral/bacterial conjunctivitis are if one or both eyes are involved, what the discharge looks like, and if there is itching. Here's a handy chart:

    *TW? gross eye pic and I'm not sure how to do spoiler boxes or I would!*










    (Not a substitution for actual medical care, obviously, but this can at least help you decide if it's worth a Saturday visit to a kid's clinic....aka HELL on earth)
    nlc8424pourmeamocktail
  • @Wishilivedinflorida I was hoping you'd respond haha. Thank you for that chart, I appreciate it! Based on that info, I'm fairly confident it is allergy related. My gut feeling combined with the fact that it doesn't seem to be bothering him makes me lean toward waiting until the week to do anything unless it gets worse.

    EErin86
  • @franklynns if you’re inviting family people that didn’t come to the first one or wouldn’t be offered by a second shower then go for it. I would guess your mom wouldn’t suggest it if it wasn’t ok in your family. Unless your mom is awful and super self centered 
    EErin86nlc8424Wishilivedinfloridastothi
  • spottedgingerspottedginger
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    member
    edited April 2018
    @franklynns I would still need more convincing and info- was your mom not able to host but still attended a shower? Would most of the guest list have attended a shower for your first? If you register, are you going to ask for things that you received as gifts for your first and got rid of? If I was coming to the second shower and saw a gift on the registry that I’d previously bought for you needed to be replaced because you got rid of it, I would be pretty hurt and angry, no matter if you were family or a close friend. 

    Eta: not so much pissed that you got rid of it, but that you got rid of it and then expected someone else to buy it for you again. 
    BostonBaby1stothinlc8424DanyTargaryen
  • @nlc8424 when buddy had pink eye the doc said most of the time they don't even treat it any more and they consider it like a cold on the eyes and that it just needs to run its course. If it were my kid I would wait until next week and get him in to see the regular doc just to rule out anything that actually needs treatment, but wouldn't worry about trying to get him in to a urgent care unless he starts having other syptoms.


    *I'm so obviously not a doctor and not qualified to give medical advice, so I'm only presenting my non expert opinions. My opinion is that it's not an urgent condition.
    nlc8424
  • stothistothi
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its First Anniversary First Answer
    member
    edited April 2018
    @franklynns I think if your Mom wants to throw a shower/sprinkle/whatever and knows people who want to attend, then go for it. I would caution to not be upset if some people decline, because some just don't like second showers and that's ok. Just enjoy the people who do come.
    I agree with @spottedginger to make sure to not re-register for anything someone already got you, unless it's a consumable item like diapers or something. Like I was gifted a fancy infant tub with my first that we gave to a friend when buddy outgrew it. I would NOT put another baby tub on my registry this time and would just go to the store myself to replace it.
    spottedgingerBostonBaby1DanyTargaryen
  • mrsman2018mrsman2018
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    edited April 2018
    Wishilivedinflorida I still have to test drive the double strollers before I make a decision. I am in Canada, so even on Amazon with the extra seat, it's around $1200. 
  • Help with clothing amounts! DD is two. How many shorts/shirts/pants/other items do you keep or would be ideal?? I order DD’s spring and summer clothing from various stores the other weekend and my mom also ordered stuff. Uhhh I think we went over board now that it’s arrived. In my defense there were decent sales! Trying to decide what if anything to return. 
  • @Lcardinal04 My DD also has approximately one million of everything. Potentially more clothes than I do. From my experience, it seems like she didn't grow as quickly between ages 2-5, which meant she could reuse clothing from a year prior (i.e. she is 5.5 and still has some 3T summer shirts that fit her!) However, I still see cute things I want to buy her and she gets gifts, which has resulted in an overflowing closet and needing to buy more hangers. :# I agree with @stothi that it probably also depends how often you want to do laundry! 
    Me: 32   DH: 32
    BFP #1: 1/23/2012  DD: Born 9/20/2012  <3
    BFP #2: 12/30/2017  DS: Due 9/10/2018  <3


    Lcardinal04BostonBaby1
  • @stothi @southernlady07 thank you! There are like 12-15 shorts, and 15 or so tops so that doesn’t sound tooooo crazy, taking into account what you said. Only one bathing suit though so I need at least one more, and socks.

     I feel like her winter wear was so limited that I was washing every few days and her clothing was wearing out super fast. Thanks ladies for responding with the thoughts!!
    stothiEErin86southernlady07
  • @Lcardinal04 that sounds like a good amount to me! No washing mid week and you can mix it up so she isn't wearing the same exact 7 outfits on repeat.
    I definitely vote for 1-2 more swimsuits depending on how often you go swimming/play in the water.
    nlc8424
  • I just lost at least half an hour of our morning to dd tantrumming... it started as nuisance whines and constant fussing so I sent her to her room “to play until you’re happy voice comes back”...she took it to a full blown screaming disaster. It backfired because her barbies were not in there, they usually distract her. I understand she has no idea how to calm herself, but that is why we do this, to work on it, I gave her lots of suggestions, she would stop long enough to listen for me doing things, or ask who was messaging me... *so many eyerolls here* 

    after it was finally over she says “Sometimes I’m just like this when I miss daddy, and sometimes I’m not”... he’s at work, normal day, he was home early last night and they had special “daddy-kid” time while i went to a meeting. She is not daddy-deprived by any means. 

    I have no idea how to parent this!

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"

    bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis

    bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"

    **Psalm 139:16**

  • @jhjocelyn I’m sorry but her comment about missing dad made me laugh!
    DS had a tantrum last night when I told him he had to eat dinner at the table with me. When he finally calmed down I asked why he was so upset. His answer was “because I was crying”. 
    jhjocelynnlc8424EErin86BostonBaby1
  • jhjocelynjhjocelyn
    Long-Lasting Membership 1000 Comments 500 Love Its Photogenic
    member
    edited April 2018
    @nackie I was mostly amused the whole time, I watched her on her video monitor. I kept texting dh updates. He hates knowing she’s crying, but also has never witnessed this. He offered to facetime her...um no. I am not opening that door until the screaming is over! 

    Edit to add: it ended about 40 min in when she found a barbie to play with....but then messaging daddy made her all sad again. She continues to instantly react w tears rather than the usual go w the flow... it’s gonna be a lonnggg day

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"

    bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis

    bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"

    **Psalm 139:16**

    nackienlc8424
  • @franklynns My son will almost be seven when this one comes.  I wanted to do a shower because of a couple different reasons.  1. We didn’t keep anything from my son’s infancy—we honestly thought before last year we would only have one (due to fertility issues.)  2. Last fall we miscarried our second.  I felt like this one deserves a rainbow baby celebration.  3. I’m just very excited?!?!

    However my family only does showers for the first...I was told it was inappropriate to have a second shower.  So instead we are doing a “gender reveal bash to start a diaper stash.”  We already started hitting yardsales for stuff....I can’t afford all new things.  I think if you want to have a shower then do it.  If your family doesn’t support it, then they won’t come—simple as that.
  • In my circle, most people do "small things" like clothes for a first shower. I got a pack-n-play from my mom, and a diaper bag from my mom's best friend, and a few big things from the inlaws, but everyone else really just gave little toys/clothes/books/etc. So for us, a "sprinkle" doesn't make a lot of sense, since that's basically what people do for the first shower! I did go to one second shower in our circle, but it seemed to make sense--they had one kid, but then were having twins. They also don't have a lot of money, which for some reason makes it make more sense to me. I have more money than most of our families, so it seems weird to essentially ask them for gifts. 

    I'm really interested in double-stroller suggestions! We make DD (almost 2!) walk most places we go. Like, we never bring the stroller to the zoo, for example. But we do use the stroller when we're walking TO places, like going out to ice cream a half mile from our house. I saw a woman with a Graco Ready2Grow Click Connect the other day, and was asking her about it. It's less than $200! That's the brand car seat we have, so it's interesting to me. She loved it. I'm only worried about it being terrible on rough sidewalks, but if I can save myself like $400 and just deal with it for the amount I expect to use it, I think it'll be worth it. I also like that I can put DD in the front so she can see everything, and have the infant seat up near where I can see it. 

  • Am I the only STM who gets anxiety attacks about double strollers?  It only happened the once, but the first time my husband sent me a link for a double stroller I about died. Just hit me like a ton of bricks that we were going to have two soon!!! I'm going to be out numbered!!! Ahhhhh!!!! I never had a single ounce of anxiety about caring for my first baby. I know babies and kids. I ain't sc'rd. Or at least I wasn't. For some reason I'm super intimidated by this whole infant and a toddler scenario.
    nlc8424spottedgingerBostonBaby1
  • @stothi I’m also pretty terrified of the infant/toddler combo. I think I’ve got the stroller thing mostly sorted out though. 
    stothiBostonBaby1
  • @jhjocelyn ; Those tantrums are just fun!!  My 6 year old throws them too!   Sometimes it seems there is a reason and sometimes it seems not and is just life and female emotions and growing up and ....   Not much help though.  

    One thing she may be going through as the pregnancy gets more real to her is the new baby coming so it may be worth it to have a chat with her about it at some point in time...
    Daughter #1 - Feb 2012
    Daughter #2 - Oct 2014
    Daughter #3 - Nov 2016
    Baby #4 - Sept 2018
    jhjocelyn
  • I just keep my fingers crossed that DD won't have a meltdown every time I'm holding the new baby. Double strollers are exciting... I just wish I would have thought of that when buying gear for #1. Also I saw soooooo many side by side double strollers at the zoo on Sunday and they looked soooooo wide
    stothispottedgingerBostonBaby1
  • edited April 2018
    Tl;Dr crib sleeping toddler should camp in packnplay or queen size air mattress alone?

    So...going camping super pregnant and with a toddler, a group of non-kid people, and two dogs. :) Hopefully most of that doesn't matter.

    Last year he was 1 and we coslept at home, so that's what we did camping, worked great.

    This year he's 2, and won't cosleep at home if he's sick and exhausted even. We luckily have a two room tent, so yay. He is accustomed to sleeping in pack and play. It will fit in there fine, but getting him in and out will be...something my husband does due to head clearance and belly. Or, we could invest in another air mattress for him. It literally is the exact size of the tent floor, have had tent for years. I figure the mesh sides of the pnp are similar in feel to the tent sides anyway. It'll be a lot of space though and a different feel of the mattress. But...easy to get him in and out of, and if he needs us overnight at least we can get in with him.

    I've got no idea which is easier to cope with. Anyone camped with a toddler who loves his crib?

    Sorry for length...

    Going to be fun anyway though, I'll just pee outside a lot. 
    Me: 31
    DH: 30
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    BFP 1/1/18, due 9/7/18 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
    EErin86nlc8424BostonBaby1sarah-ruby-21
  • @pourmeamocktail I have no advice, but good luck!  I love camping but am not brave enough to try it with a toddler or while pregnant, let alone both!
    pourmeamocktail
  • nackie said:
    @pourmeamocktail I have no advice, but good luck!  I love camping but am not brave enough to try it with a toddler or while pregnant, let alone both!
    Thanks! Upside is dad is high energy and toddler loves playing outside and his carrier, plus large group of aunts/uncles to play with him. Might end up short on sleep, but toddler will be super entertained. They can always go hike and I'll sit in my swim suit, dowsing myself in water to stay cool readying a book at the camp site, potentially alone. I'm excited actually. 

    He was 13 months last time, had a ball even though he missed msot of his naps and was an hour or two short on sleep every night, lol. Still totally fun. 
    Me: 31
    DH: 30
    Married 7/18/15
    1st born at 35+4 on 6/6/16
    Team green turned BLUE!
    BFP 1/1/18, due 9/7/18 Team Green

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    Pregnancy Ticker
    BostonBaby1EErin86
  • As an aside, we used our double stroller for the first time a couple of weeks ago, for  those stressing about the double (I know I did.) It actually does fir through doors but living in a cold climate, I won’t add a boogie board until next spring. Baby wearing the littlest is easy enough. 

    @pourmeamocktail No experience but my instinct would be pack n play. Good luck! 
    spottedgingerpourmeamocktailstothi
  • Lcardinal04  I tried to not get too much for DD. She had about 20 sleepers because those are what she lived in as infant. As she has gotten older, I keep it to around 10 pairs of pants, 10-15 tops, 3 pairs of pjs, a few coats, hats and shoes. She does not have any dresses at the moment because it's not summer but in the summer she will likely have the same - 10 each of shirts, shorts and dresses or rompers. 
    Lcardinal04
  • mrsman2018mrsman2018
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    member
    edited April 2018
    stothi  My life is consumed with finding the right double stroller. I chose the City Select as "The One" but my husband will not spend the money on it. There is a way cheaper one but I hate how the seats do not recline. 
    stothiBostonBaby1
  • @BostonBaby1 What double do you have? I’m sorry if you already mentioned it. 

    I’m still leaning towards the Contours Options Elite but not til I test drive other tandems at a BBB to compare. If I think one is worth the extra $$ I’ll pony it up. 
    BostonBaby1
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