STM+ thread w/o 4/9 - Page 2 — The Bump
September 2018 Moms

STM+ thread w/o 4/9

24

Re: STM+ thread w/o 4/9

  • @jhjocelyn It sounds like she did a great job. It they cannot take loud crying or screaming then they shouldn’t work with pediatric patients. DH works in medicine and I have never one heard him complain about a child. Just feeling bad that they have to go through it in the first place.

    RE: car seats. Our infant seat is in the middle and toddler is behind the passenger seat. It’s really okay. We put the infant seat down on the empty seat before positioning to get DD clicked in. We don’t give DS blankets or anything loose that could have been an issue. It works well and gives enough room for the driver. It was fine even post c section.
    jhjocelynspottedgingerstothi
  • @jhjocelyn spending a day with dad helped a little bit with the clinginess! Just a little, but I'll take it lol.

    Glad your DD got through some of the first part of her appointments. I'm sure she does a fantastic job of handling all of her medical appointments. Having empathy for patients is lacking in many areas in healthcare, I'm sorry you've had less than great interactions in the past. Truthfully she probably has more appointments than any of the practitioners have themselves.

    jhjocelynBostonBaby1EErin86spottedginger
  • Ssooo miss amazing dd who flew through her xrays and blood draw so smoothly.... also just lied to my face and then got offended and cried when I told her she was lying!!  I texted dh “i have no idea how to parent this” and he came and she mostly confessed. He brought me back in so she could aplogize and she said “daddy says I did it, so I need to say I’m sorry” ... if it weren’t for the fact that there is clearly a blue marker drawn A where there wasn’t this morning, I would totally have believed her...

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"

    bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis

    bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"

    **Psalm 139:16**

  • Yikes @Wishilivedinflorida! Glad all is well! Hopefully it’s a quick recovery.  :) 

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    bfp#1-10/29/12,EDD: 7/3/13. nothing found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 12/10/12. "Bean"

    bfp#2-5/10/13! EDD: 1/18/14. "Peanut" Arrived 1/13/14. Diagnosed with Cystic Fibrosis

    bfp#3- 9/26/14. EDD: 5/7/15. no heartbeat found @ 1st u/s, natural mc 10/23/14. "Little Bug"

    **Psalm 139:16**

    WishilivedinfloridaBostonBaby1
  • Glad all is well @Wishilivedinflorida. How scary 
    WishilivedinfloridaBostonBaby1
  • Take it easy for awhile @Wishilivedinflorida! That must have been scary!
    WishilivedinfloridaBostonBaby1
  •  @Wishilivedinflorida Scary. Glad all is well now. 
    Wishilivedinflorida
  • @Wishilivedinflorida glad everything is okay! I hope your back feels better soon, so hard not to pick up our little ones often.

    WishilivedinfloridaBostonBaby1
  • @Wishilivedinflorida How frightening :( Hopefully the contractions are all gone and rest/water/Tylenol can help your back heal. 
    nlc8424Wishilivedinflorida
  • Mamas- question... I got a breast pump when my son was born with insurance, I have the Medela Pump in Style Advanced.. I liked it, didn't love it but it worked just fine for the year I was breastfeeding. Anyways I have heard good things about the Spectra pumps and although it seems like such a waste since my pump isn't very old, I am wondering if I should get a different one for this babe? I think insurance will cover it but not 100% sure. Thoughts?

    Me: 28, DH: 30 Married July 2014  DX: Severe MFI- 3 failed IUI's, IVF #1 Egg retrieval June 4th 2016, 5 day transfer- BFP Baby Boy! EDD 2/25/2017. Our sweet miracle Carter Bennett arrived 2/12/2017 6 lbs, 2 oz 19 inches. <3 Surprise BFP!!! Baby Girl due 10/1/2018.


  • @chicandbubbly - Assuming my insurance will cover another one, which I believe it's one per pregnancy so they should, I will definitely be getting another one. Pumps die so I'm not going to pass up the chance to get another in case something happens.

    I actually have both a Medela and a Spectra already. I got the Medela through insurance then the Spectra from a mom on my BMB from DS. I kept the Medela at work and used the Spectra at home. I liked that you could personalize the settings on the Spectra, but since I already had a ton of Medela accessories I kept the Medela as my main pump.

    I really didn't have a preference between my pumps and since the Spectra has been used much less so far I'll probably get another Medela.
    _______________________________________________________________________________________________
    MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
    DS born 9/13/16
    BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
    chicandbubbly
  • @chicandbubbly I agree with @DanyTargaryen form what I've read the pumps start to degrade after a year. I had the Spectra last time and liked it. I will likely get another one and then leave the new one at work where I will mostly be pumping and have the old one at home in case I need it. Lugging a pump to and from work every day was a pain for me. Your insurance shouldn't take into consideration that you already have a pump
    DanyTargaryenspottedginger
  • Thanks for the feedback @DanyTargaryen - Definitely lots to consider! I found out there is a piece you can buy for using the Medela flanges with Spectra pump which is interesting! I use a smaller size flange not available with the Spectra.

    Me: 28, DH: 30 Married July 2014  DX: Severe MFI- 3 failed IUI's, IVF #1 Egg retrieval June 4th 2016, 5 day transfer- BFP Baby Boy! EDD 2/25/2017. Our sweet miracle Carter Bennett arrived 2/12/2017 6 lbs, 2 oz 19 inches. <3 Surprise BFP!!! Baby Girl due 10/1/2018.


    DanyTargaryen
  • @chicandbubbly - There are also third-party adapters available to make the Medela bottles work with the Spectra pump. My least favorite thing about the Spectra was the bottles so that may be helpful to look into if you go Spectra. I hated how few threads there were to screw the Spectra bottles into the connectors.
    _______________________________________________________________________________________________
    MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
    DS born 9/13/16
    BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
  • So some insurance plans have different qualifications as to when you can get another (eg: one per pregnancy, one per calendar year, one per 36 month period), so definitely call your insurance and check. 
    EErin86BostonBaby1
  • nackienackie
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary 5 Answers
    member
    edited April 2018
    I’m really hoping I can get a second. Lugging that pump to work and home every day sucked. My insurance covers a new one every three years. DH thinks it’s three years between the birth of the children, but I’m hoping it actually three years between purchases since I got my pump when I was still in second tri last time, so I’ll hit three years before my maternity leave is up. 
    I had the pump in style too and it was ok. I’ll probably get another just so I don’t have to deal with two sets of parts
    *edit: typos 
    EErin86
  • If anyone gets screwed in regards to another pump, I scored a second PISA, complete with bag and cooler pack for $160 from amazon last time I delivered. That way I had a pump for home and one for work. Totally worth the extra money to me to not have to unpack a pump every day, since I pumped every day at home before work as well. I feel like there are good deals pretty often, so it might be reasonable affordable to pay OOP if needed. My plan is to replace my work pump with the new PISA I get this time through insurance and continue using my old home pump at home since it has less mileage. 
    southernlady07nackieDanyTargaryen
  • @Wishilivedinflorida That is good to know! I'm not sure why I never thought to buy a second pump with my first because it was a PITA to haul it back and forth to and from work. I had a PISA last time and am planning to buy a Spectra this time around (my insurance will only pay for a manual pump-insert all the side eyes) and may keep an eye out for a good deal on a second Spectra or PISA to keep at home, because I still have all of those parts.
    Me: 32   DH: 32
    BFP #1: 1/23/2012  DD: Born 9/20/2012  <3
    BFP #2: 12/30/2017  DS: Due 9/10/2018  <3


  • @southernlady07 I’ve heard the Spectra is even less expensive OOP; not sure if that’s true or not. I’m sticking with the PISA since I have all the parts and it worked fine for me. 
    southernlady07
  • @Wishilivedinflorida Ohh that is good to know! I'm waiting to hear back from Aeroflow right now; hoping I can at least get a discount or something through insurance. If not, that's fine and I can at least use HSA funds to pay for it.
    Me: 32   DH: 32
    BFP #1: 1/23/2012  DD: Born 9/20/2012  <3
    BFP #2: 12/30/2017  DS: Due 9/10/2018  <3


    Wishilivedinflorida
  • My mom’s friends got me the PISA last time off my registry and I got an Ameda pump from insurance which was nothing fancy but all they covered. It was really nice to have one at home so I only had to bring my PISA home on the weekends. My insurance will cover another one so I guess I’m getting another Ameda? It didn’t work well towards the end so I will have lots of extra parts to use with the new one. I just hope my PISA lasts.
    Wishilivedinflorida
  • @jhjocelyn - Yay for her handling the appt so well!! Sorry about the funky bloodwork and having to re-do it.
    _______________________________________________________________________________________________
    MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
    DS born 9/13/16
    BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
    jhjocelynpourmeamocktailBostonBaby1
  • Hi! Any advice on the current thoughts or etiquette on having a baby shower for your second child?

    We gave most of our stuff away as our DS was done with it because we were so sure we only wanted one. Well here we are two years later and #2 is on the way!!

    Just not sure the right thing to do about a shower/sprinkle. I don't want my family to feel obligated.

    And this has been on my mind and just yesterday my boss asked me if they had to throw me a 2nd shower at work. Of course I said no - just the way she worded it made it clear she thought it was a bad idea. 
  • spottedgingerspottedginger
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    member
    edited April 2018
    I am not a fan of showers or sprinkles for subsequent children, even of opposite sex. It isn’t a thing in my social group and I give t the side eye. I’ve made a private registry for this (my second) child of things that I will purchase just for the completion discount. If you are asking the actual formal etiquette, the answer is not to. 
    Eta: I don’t give women from other regions the side eye bc expectations and social norms are different. I would side eye people in my friend group who did. I had a friend hint at me giving her a sprinkle less than two years after I threw her an expensive shower. I looked her dead in the eye and didn’t respond. 
    EErin86nlc8424BostonBaby1mrsman2018
  • @franklynns I think it totally depends on what’s typical with your family/friends. It’s very normal where I live and I have been to several showers/sprinkles for second babies. I have gone back and forth about this a lot because my babes will be six years apart, opposite sex and I have had multiple friends ask when my shower is going to be. However, I really do not want to have a typical shower/sprinkle with the expectation that people bring gifts. I do want to celebrate this baby and know my family/friends do too, so I’ve shared that I’d rather do something like a low-key brunch with some fun games/activities and a nice “no gifts please” message on the invitations.

    We did save a decent amount of stuff from DD and have already started buying things to fill in the gaps. I know family and friends who are planning to buy gifts will do so anyway, and I can share our registry with those who ask for it and we can buy the rest with the completion discount. 
    Me: 32   DH: 32
    BFP #1: 1/23/2012  DD: Born 9/20/2012  <3
    BFP #2: 12/30/2017  DS: Due 9/10/2018  <3


    nlc8424
  • I am going to exchange an old car seat for a coupon at Target this weekend for a double stroller. Anyone have one they recommend (my little girl will be 3 in September)?
  • @franklynns I think it’s a completely geographical and social group/family specific question. I got side eyed from my sister for having one shower, and there is no way a second would ever happen. Other areas/families every baby is celebrated with some form of a party. 
  • This topic has me thinking I want to host a BBQ in August as a sort of “last hurrah” before the new baby, but I’m very hesitant because I do not want it to look like a gift grab at all. I think we will just call it a casual cookout and leave it at that. In our area some people do have sprinkles for second kids, but mine will only be 17 months apart. There’s no way people should buy me anything! I’m ok with new outfits when the baby is here (that’s a typical norm for subsequent kids in my circle), but that’s it. 
    EErin86
  • @franklynns - Opinions are definitely family/social group specific.

    In my circle you get one shower. It was a huge deal (not in a good way) when a cousin got married for a second time and got her mom to throw her a second bridal shower. So much frustration from other family members about even being invited and people definitely blew it off, which my cousin was pissed about but that's her.

    This is our second baby and if for some reason someone were to offer to throw me a shower, I would thank them and decline. Even if I didn't have everything saved from DS, it is no one else's responsibility to replace all the stuff I got rid of.

    As for your statement that you don't want your family to feel obligated, the easiest way is to not bring up a shower. If you don't ask about one, maybe it will never come up. If someone offers, it is ok to say no.

    Some circles are all about celebrating every baby, but in mine that would not fly.
    _______________________________________________________________________________________________
    MMC 8/5/15 at 8 weeks
    DS born 9/13/16
    BFP 1/13/18 - EDD 9/20/18 - It's a boy!
    spottedgingermrsman2018
  • @Wishilivedinflorida I think the easiest way not not make them feel obligated/ wondering whether to bring a gift is to just host a big bbq or party without mentioning the baby or “last hurrah” at all. It being associated with you being about to have a baby is how the waters might get muddied. 
    EErin86southernlady07
  • Thanks for all of your advice on the shower/sprinkle. My Mom is the one that asked if she could throw me a shower this time around. She was not able to last time and that may be why.  Thanks again!!
    EErin86DanyTargaryen
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