TTCAL w/o 12/4 — The Bump
Trying to Get Pregnant

TTCAL w/o 12/4

This is a general trigger warning that CP, miscarriage / spontaneous abortion, selective abortion due to medical complications, and / or stillbirth may be mentioned.** 

Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc.

Status:

How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R?

Any testing coming up/any recent results?

GTKY: What was your first job?
DD - August 2015
TTC #2 - April 2017
BFP May 13, 2017 - NMC June 5, 2017 (dx blighted ovum)
BFP August 6, 2017- CP August 17, 2017
BFP October 14, 2017 - NMC November 5, 2017
BFP February 1, 2018 - CP February 3, 2018
BFP May 25, 2018 - Due February 5, 2019


BusinessWifetinjp78
«13

Re: TTCAL w/o 12/4

  • @meatballs37 Welcome, but I'm so sorry that you're here in the first place. Your post brought tears to my eyes. My sister had TTTS several years ago with her identical twin boys, with a different outcome than yours, so I remember the hospital stays, surgeries, endless ultrasounds, and just waiting to see what would happen. I'm so so sorry that you're going through this. It's such an awful condition and I wish that no one had to go through that. So many hugs to you, not that it helps, but I'll be thinking about you.  <3
    *TW*
    Me: 31 | DH: 33
    DD: 8/2014
    TTC #2: 6/2017
    BFP 8/3/2017 | CP 8/4
    BFP 10/16/2017 | CP 10/21
    BFP 12/18/2017 | CP 12/28
    BFP 2/15/2018 | EDD: November 2nd | It's a girl!  <3
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
    Nov 18 July Siggy Challenge: Summer Movie Scenes

    BusinessWifezamora_spin
  • @offtoneverland thank you. TTTS is such an awful disease. I wish they knew what caused it. I think that’s the most frustrating part is that they don’t know. I’m also sorry your sister had to go through it all too even though her outcome was different. It’s a stressful pregnancy. 



    offtoneverlandBusinessWifezamora_spinemmasemm
  • @starla I remember your screen name on feb. I’m so sorry for your loss as well. :( 



    starlaBusinessWife
  • Multiple posts because everything I type keeps disappearing!

    @meatballs37, I am so incredibly sorry for your loss.  I can only imagine what you are experiencing.  Are you doing well from the infections?  It is great the your OB is being so attentive.  I too am trying to use the long term bench time to get my self healthier physically and mentally.  

    @ChloandCoco, that's great that things went well with the acupuncturist!  I have been considering trying to go too.  

    Me: 30 DH:32

    DD 3/11  

    MMC 2/12

    DS 1/13

    TTC #3 since 2/17.  Malignant molar missed miscarriage 8/22/17

    ChloandCocomeatballs37BusinessWife
  • @holly321 I really hope they let up on that 5 month bench. What's the reasoning, is it the chemo ?
    @starla Sorry for your loss, Good Luck with all the test.
    @offtoneverland YAY for O day!
    @CraftyG I get the "dipping your toes in" thing. My first month off the bench I had to just go with it because I was still processing things and wasn't ready to dive right in. 
    @meatballs37 I'm so very sorry for your loss. Take your time and be kind to yourself. I know as others have said those words don't mean much after a tragedy like this but I want you to know i'm here for you.
    @ChloandCoco hopefully AF gets here soon!

    Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc.
    MC 8/2017

    Status: TWW

    How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? I'm doing well overall. BFN yesterday sent me into a spiral of why I'm here and pregnant and all that. I also checked out a website that has a chance of conceiving calculator and it told me i'm at 30% change naturally conceiving. So that wasn't the best thing to add to what I was already feeling. So now i'm trying to change my mind set and focus on getting healthy so when it does happen i'll be in a healthier overall state.  

    Any testing coming up/any recent results? If AF isn't here i'll POAS again tomorrow. 

    GTKY: What was your first job? I started babysitting for a family friend when I was 13. But, my first real job was as a CNA summer after HS. I was to a technical skills HS in the afternoons my junior/senior years and graduated certified. 
    Me: 34 DH: 45
    July Fourth Outfit fails


    DSS: 19

    DSD: 16

    DS: 3(Nov'14)

    MMC:8/17

    MC: 1/18

    meatballs37starlaofftoneverlandzamora_spin
  • @kindbytealikat , no with methotrexate, the newest research says that 1 ovulation cycle is fine.  I have to wait because they have to be sure the cancer won't come back, and since the way to know if it has is a rise in HCG, I can't get pregnant.  But the odds of regrowth are less than 1% after being negative for 1 month.  Then it is like .2% at 3 months and about .17% at 6 months.  I can't remember the real percentages (the real percentages are probably lower) but my point is, is that there isn't really a difference between 3 and 6 months, so why the long wait?   
    FX for you tomorrow.  I am sorry about the odds from that website, why were they so low?  And as much as I shouldn't, I now plan to go do the same....

    Me: 30 DH:32

    DD 3/11  

    MMC 2/12

    DS 1/13

    TTC #3 since 2/17.  Malignant molar missed miscarriage 8/22/17

    offtoneverlandgalactickatesCraftyG
  • @holly321 my guess is it’s low because I’m obese and over 30, but under 35 
    Me: 34 DH: 45
    July Fourth Outfit fails


    DSS: 19

    DSD: 16

    DS: 3(Nov'14)

    MMC:8/17

    MC: 1/18

  • @galactickates, I was back and forth about saying anything, but considering my situation, and what i have read, I feel like I have to. if you were to get pregnant, and then have a rise in your HCG at your next draw, they may think it is persistent EP and might push for MTX, so, I would be careful until your HCG is back to normal.  Unfortunately, EP is one of the causes of GTD.  Have you taken a home test?

    Me: 30 DH:32

    DD 3/11  

    MMC 2/12

    DS 1/13

    TTC #3 since 2/17.  Malignant molar missed miscarriage 8/22/17

    offtoneverlandstarlaBusinessWife
  • galactickatesgalactickates
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Name Dropper Photogenic
    member
    edited December 2017
    @holly321 I did take an Home test  yesterday morning it was a BFN. I was going to take another one today and for the next couple days. I have the big pack of tests from Amazon so it's not that big of a deal for me to test as much as I want

    Eta I did do a lot of reading about why they want you to wait.  And for reasons like that.  I guess my heart is hurting so much I just want to try again so badly.  But I know it will be so much worse for me if I get a BFP before the 6-8 weeks for the exact reason you are saying. I think I mentioned it because I needed a little reality check.  
    Me:33 & DH:35 - Married 
    TTC 1 since Aug17
    BFP 1- 10/20 ended with EP Lap and left tube removed on 11/20 at 9 weeks.


    offtoneverlandholly321starlaBusinessWife
  • @galactickates *hugs*. I completely understand where you are coming from. I keep having very similar feelings, I just want to say screw it and start trying.  fortunately/unfortunately I was "made" get the depo shot (I didn't want it, but after talking to my doctor, agreed it was best.) 
    You could try now and chances are everything would be perfectly fine, but the worry would be the worst.  TW, I was a wreck for a large part of my pregnancy with my son that was within months of my first loss. End TW

    Me: 30 DH:32

    DD 3/11  

    MMC 2/12

    DS 1/13

    TTC #3 since 2/17.  Malignant molar missed miscarriage 8/22/17

    galactickatesBusinessWife
  • @meatballs37 - I'm so sorry for your loss.  I was so wrapped up in me me me. I can't believe I didn't even see your post and all the responses.  I feel so awful and embarrassed.  I can't even imagine the heart ache you are going through. We are all here for you.  These ladies are all so amazing and supportive even while going through their own difficult time.  ((So many hugs))
    Me:33 & DH:35 - Married 
    TTC 1 since Aug17
    BFP 1- 10/20 ended with EP Lap and left tube removed on 11/20 at 9 weeks.


    starlameatballs37
  • @BusinessWife - I'm sorry about your DH. I completely disagree with your husband.  I know how badly you want/wanted that LO. To get that BFP and then to lose it is just awful.  Men can be really insensitive. They don't day dream like we do about our future children.  One of my best friends (also neighbor) TTC for 3 years.  At beginning of the year she got a BFP but lost 4 days later.  It still really upsets to her. I understand why.  We've both cried a lot,  with and for each other.  It just hurts. 
    Me:33 & DH:35 - Married 
    TTC 1 since Aug17
    BFP 1- 10/20 ended with EP Lap and left tube removed on 11/20 at 9 weeks.


    BusinessWife
  • @BusinessWife, I am sorry about your DH, mine can be the same way.  With this pregnancy, I started to bleed at 5 weeks and my hcg/progesterone was really low, so DH and my mom kept saying I should not have tested so early, I would not have known/been worrying.   I want to shake them so bad, I took clomid and had ovulation confirmed, so I kind of had to test once my period was late.  And I am sorry your friends you reached out to did not respond.  I know it is hard to find the words, but it still hurts when people don't acknowledge what is going on.  Literally everyone knows my situation, and several "friends" have not said a word.  

    Me: 30 DH:32

    DD 3/11  

    MMC 2/12

    DS 1/13

    TTC #3 since 2/17.  Malignant molar missed miscarriage 8/22/17

    BusinessWifeofftoneverlandstarla
  • Omg I just don't get it!  How hard is it to say hey, how's your day going?  Thinking of you, I'm here if you want to chat etc.  I mean Rully ppl lol
    Me: 34 | DH: 41 ~ Married / TTC since May 2015
    5/16 - Began Creighton Method CM Tracking / Napro Fertility Medicine | Progesterone + various abx cycles - all BFNs
    8/16 - SHG: ute good, at least one tube open | 10/16 - MFI Azoo dx confirmed. No known genetic cause. Vas tubes absent.
    3/17 - DH started Clomid to prepare for MESA/TESE | 4/17 - Initial RE Consult for me. | 7/17 - Successful retrieval for DH!
    9/17 - Two BTB IVFs  | 10/17 - Polypectomy  |  11/17 - 1st FET ended in CP | 12/17 - 2nd FET ... BFP!!! <3 EDD: 09/09/18

    Our little miracle is on the way...


    offtoneverlandgalactickatesdpjennifer
  • Or a simple "I'm sorry."

    Me: 30 DH:32

    DD 3/11  

    MMC 2/12

    DS 1/13

    TTC #3 since 2/17.  Malignant molar missed miscarriage 8/22/17

    BusinessWife
  • @meatballs37 I am so sorry for the loss of your boys. Thank you for coming here and sharing with us. You need and deserve all the support you can get, I hope we can all help to support you. 
    @holly321 Are you feeling less crampy? AF is annoying but would it mean things are getting back to "normal'?
    @starla I'm sorry about the breakouts. Zits suck especially when you are an adult. Is the tea tree stuff new for you? I have started experiencing a crazy level of acne that I think is hormone related. TW the first time it happened was during my most recent pregnancy end TW, and then it happened at about 4 or 5 dpo this cycle (benched so it must be progesterone). I get dozens of tiny pimples, mostly at my temples but also in other spots. It takes them a while to go away, like 10 days or so at least. 
    @offtoneverland I hope this is your sticky bean cycle. What a great Christmas present that would be. 
    @craftyg "Comparison is the the thief of joy" and while that is so true it's hard to stop comparing yourself to others. It sounds like you doing amazing things for yourself and for the family you have now and the family you will have. I hope your BFP and sticky bean are right around the corner. 
    @BusinessWife I'm sorry YH is not getting it. It's not unusual, unfortunately. I think some of the things that are hard for others (including sometimes our partners) to understand are (1) that baby was and is real, even from the first moment you saw that BFP and (2) a pregnancy loss is also a loss of a status you have been yearning and working towards, that of mother. Please know that you are still a mom, no matter what happens from here on out. As to testing early, get that out of here. Whatever. We test when we want. You still would have had a positive blood test even if you hadn't tested early, and your hopes still would have been up. 
    @galactickates I get it. It's hard to wait. I did not receive clear instructions from my RE about when we were allowed to try again following my d&c and I strongly considered trying this cycle (I was told we could try right away after my first two mc's, but there was no surgery with those). A fellow loss mom pointed out to me that if I got ku this cycle and then something bad happened, I would probably wonder whether it was because I tried too soon. Lady, you had some intense surgery, I think you gotta give it a rest. The fact that your cycle is returning is a good sign that you will be on track to try again next cycle when you are in better health. 
    Me: 36 | DH: 35 
    BFP #1 5/14/17 (EDD 1/24/18) MMC Confirmed 6/13/17
    BFP #2 8/12/17 ended in CP 8/20/17
    BFP #3 10/12/17, EDD 6/27/18, hCG drop and no fetal development at 6w, D&C 11/3/17
    BFP #4 4/21/18, EDD 1/3/19, mc due to Trisomy 22 after HB stopped at 8w 


    offtoneverlandgalactickatesBusinessWifemeatballs37
  • Ok, posted too soon and I know tags don't show up if I edit so: 
    @kindbytealikat I hope you get your BFP, is it still early? It's hard not to spiral when you see that BFN. Honestly, odds don't mean much re conceiving and to be in a 30% range is actually really good. My RE told me at my age my chance each spontaneous cycle is 15% of getting ku, which doesn't mean a damn thing because I beat that on the regular. 
    @ChloandCoco What do you have going on this weekend? Lots of parties? 


    Me: 36 | DH: 35 
    BFP #1 5/14/17 (EDD 1/24/18) MMC Confirmed 6/13/17
    BFP #2 8/12/17 ended in CP 8/20/17
    BFP #3 10/12/17, EDD 6/27/18, hCG drop and no fetal development at 6w, D&C 11/3/17
    BFP #4 4/21/18, EDD 1/3/19, mc due to Trisomy 22 after HB stopped at 8w 


    offtoneverlandChloandCocoBusinessWifekindbytealikat
  • @BusinessWife I'm really sorry your DH acted that way and it's true, guys just don't get it. They don't have that instant connection and hope because they aren't the ones carrying the baby. I found it helped to tell my DH that I was not only grieving the loss, but also the loss of announcing, planning, and the dreams of what that baby  could've been. As for people texting, after my third loss (people don't know about my second cp), only 2 of my friends texted and checked in with me. And if I didn't have the ladies on this board, it would've been a lot harder to go through. People just don't talk about miscarriages and therefore have no idea what to say or how to act around someone who is going through a loss. 
    @zamora_spin I'm going out for a fancy dinner with my DH on Friday, then a birthday dinner with my side of the family on Saturday, and on Sunday I'm hosting a cookie exchange. So super busy!
    DD - August 2015
    TTC #2 - April 2017
    BFP May 13, 2017 - NMC June 5, 2017 (dx blighted ovum)
    BFP August 6, 2017- CP August 17, 2017
    BFP October 14, 2017 - NMC November 5, 2017
    BFP February 1, 2018 - CP February 3, 2018
    BFP May 25, 2018 - Due February 5, 2019


    BusinessWifestarla
  • @zamora_spin I've been using tea teee oil for years. It does work, but I think I'm using it too much. I'm trying to exfoliate and moisturize more now. I don't usually break out like this, only a couple zits around AF. These are white heads that are kind of deep and very red. It makes them hard to get rid of. I don't know what's going on! I haven't changed anything in my routine. :(
    Me: 34 | DH: 33
    Married Aug. 2013
    TTC #1 Sep. 2016
    ***TW***
    BFP Jan. 15, 2017; MMC Mar. 4, 2017 at 10w6d
    BFP Jun. 5, 2017; MMC Aug. 2, 2017 at 11w6d
    BFP Nov. 20, 2017; ended in CP
    All the tests. Everything normal except treated for ureaplasma and DH potentially has high DNAF.
    BFP Dec. 25, 2017; EDD Sep. 5, 2018
    My chart: https://www.fertilityfriend.com/home/63f71d
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker


    zamora_spinBusinessWife
  • @starla I did that 30 day challenge over the summer and it was so great for me! I really should do it again actually.
    @galactickates I completely understand where you are coming from. We technically don't need to wait to try again, but I am forcing myself to wait this month out because if we got pregnant and had another loss, I would always wonder if it was because we didn't wait. I have to keep reminding myself that having a baby one month later than I wanted is probably not going to matter long term. 

    Introduce yourself and anything you think is important: number of loss(es), when you had the loss(es), diagnosis / conditions surrounding loss, etc. 
    TFAS. We had a NMC last week at 8 weeks. 

    Status: TTA/Self-Benched? Sorry. I'm new. Be gentle with me.

    How are things going? What is something that you are struggling with this week? What is going well for you this week? R/R? I've been through a lot of emotions this week. I went from completely devastated last week to guilt over whether I did something to cause this to guilt over actually feeling ok with our loss when it's only been a week to guilt over being excited to try again and hopefully get the baby I dreamed of. 

    Any testing coming up/any recent results? I have to take a HPT at the end of the month to make sure it's negative. Being the responsible adult that I am, I bought the giant box of tests off Amazon so I can allow myself to test earlier when we are unbenched. 

    GTKY: What was your first job? I worked at an ice cream shop! It was actually a really great first job. 
    BusinessWifestarlaofftoneverland
  • Y’all - AF was due today and started experiencing cramps this morning. The cramping has gotten worse and worse to the point where I have gasped a few times from the pain. Definitely worse than anything I have experienced before. Ibuprofen has done nothing. A bath helped me a little. Weirdest thing is I’m still not bleeding.

    Anyone experienced this first cycle post d&c? Can’t tell if I should be worried.
    Me: 36 | DH: 35 
    BFP #1 5/14/17 (EDD 1/24/18) MMC Confirmed 6/13/17
    BFP #2 8/12/17 ended in CP 8/20/17
    BFP #3 10/12/17, EDD 6/27/18, hCG drop and no fetal development at 6w, D&C 11/3/17
    BFP #4 4/21/18, EDD 1/3/19, mc due to Trisomy 22 after HB stopped at 8w 


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