Weekly Questions - week of 11/13

canucklehead123

Hey all - thought I'd get a weekly question thread started as I've seen on other BMBs. Post any and all of your questions! 
EDIT: Just noticed this was supposed to be posted on Sunday but hope you will all forgive this small slip! 

mrsj1215

Good books for first time moms to read? I'm a big reader and would love to know some good ones!

canucklehead123

@mrsj1215 I just bought a book called "How to Grow a Baby and Push It Out" by Clemmie Hooper - she is a midwife from the UK and has four children herself... I bought it because I love her and her husband's Instagram feeds (yes I am that person lol), and I thought the title was cute!  I haven't read it but I plan on cracking it soon!

ajsanders-2

@mrsj1215 - I am currently reading 'what to expect when your expecting,' and I did also read 'The Baby Bump: 100s of secrets to surviving those 9 long months,' I've got a list somewhere as I am a reader myself, but that list is at home. 

catftm2018

@mrsj1215 and @ajsanders-2 I’m also reading what to expect when your expecting. But am also an avid reader so I’m completely open to any and all suggestions!! 

ajsanders-2

Anyone make travel plans prior to getting KU?
We were planning a trip to Cancun in March with friends, but now I don't know if I'll be able to go. We haven't told our friends yet that we are expecting. Only DH and I currently know. Parents are getting told on Thanksgiving. Waiting to hear back from the NP that I see on the 28th if she has any good insight. I kind of have the feeling that they'll tell me it is probably not a good idea to go.

amylu914

@ajsanders-2 we were planning a Mexico trip for July but luckily had not booked yet. Is Zika still a thing? I think Mexico might be on that list. 

mrsj1215

We usually go on a family vacation every year, but it's usually in June or sometime around then so I'm not sure about mine either! 

lucky13mama

Last pregnancy we went to Puerto Vallarta in January so I was maybe 10 weeks pregnant @ajsanders-2 - it was actually January 2016 and we were there on vacation when the big Zika scare exploded on the news. My doctor hadn’t been concerned when I had asked and it literally got news coverage as we were there. When I got home and went to the doctor they even said if they had known they wouldn’t have been super concerned as long as I wore bug spray and kept covered if I noticed mosquitoes. I got bit a bunch but nothing came of it. It’s your choice though if your doctor says it’s okay but you’re still worried.

runsomewhere

@ajsanders-2 is Zika still a risk? If not I would go. I went to Jamaica at 17 weeks w/ my DD and would totally travel while pregnant again.

Question for you moms, I have a 2 year old DD, she will be a few months shy of 3 when #2 is born. Do I need a double stroller? We're a pretty active family (parks, events, outdoors etc.) However, I feel like we rarely put DD in the stroller anymore. I assumed we wouldn't need a double but now I'm having second thoughts.

ajsanders-2

@amylu914, @runsomewhere, @lucky13mama - to be honest I don't know it is still a thing. When the nurse from my doctors office asked if we traveled to or plan to travel to a location with Zika. I looked it up yesterday and Mexico is on the list.

acunamatada

@runsomewhere I think we're leaning towards just having one stroller. I still put DS (2yo) in a stroller occasionally- he's just so high strung. I hoping by the time he's 3 he'll calm down a bit, plus I have a Tula that I'm more than excited to start using again. I've also seen cool attachments to strollers, I don't remember the name, but they're like little skateboards for toddlers to stand up behind the stroller while you push.
Worst case, we could buy a stroller in the future if we need it, but I don't plan on buying one ahead of time. 

ajsanders-2

Got a message back, looks like Mexico is out. Guess we'll have to plan a different trip! Which is okay with me.

Since Mexico is an area of concern for Zika the CDC recommendations are to avoid travel to this area (for both you and your partner) during the entire pregnancy.

I've included the CDC link below if you want more information.

www.cdc.gov/pregnancy/zika/protect-yourself.html

FilmFreak933

I read "Baby 411" cover to cover with my first to create my registry. It's a bunch of reviews and rankings on everything you could basically need for baby. 

ajsanders-2

@FilmFreak933 - that's going on my list!

MrsMCBMar2014

I know it’s early to worry about this but how does one prepare a 2.5 year old (who will be 3.5 by the time the baby comes) for the baby? When we had DD, I didn’t have to worry about my 13 year old because he was used to helping with his cousins. 

Can anyone give me some advice/tips? 

canucklehead123

@ajsanders-2 oh sorry you have to cancel your trip!  I'm travelling on Friday to Palm Springs which is Zika-free - it might be a nice alternative (super sunny/warm and not too long of a flight)?

ajsanders-2

@canucklehead123 - Yeah I am kind of bummed, but it will be okay. We'll probably plan something else instead. 

mrsj1215

@canucklehead123 @ajsanders-2 @catftm2018 @FilmFreak933 can't wait to get these books!! So far I've just been googling stuff, but books are so much better to me!

acunamatada

@MrsMCBMar2014 my son is 2 and still not very verbal, he's too young to understand right now but I'm hoping he'll get it when I start showing. Something that I think is helping is he has his own baby dolls that he loves to take care of.
There's also a STM+ thread that this post would be good for, someone mentioned classes that they found for young kids to prepare them for birth/siblings. Might be something to look into? 

MrsMCBMar2014

acunamatada said:

@MrsMCBMar2014 my son is 2 and still not very verbal, he's too young to understand right now but I'm hoping he'll get it when I start showing. Something that I think is helping is he has his own baby dolls that he loves to take care of.
There's also a STM+ thread that this post would be good for, someone mentioned classes that they found for young kids to prepare them for birth/siblings. Might be something to look into? 

Oh my girl is VERY verbal. Just have to pick and choose what we tell her.  I will have to look for that thread. I hope I can find it.

KFrob

We're going to Scotland in 26 days!  No Zika worries for us haha.  I'm just hoping to get some energy back by then and not have a case of the barfies.  So far I've only traveled with DH while I've been pregnant.  

millpe

@ajsanders-2 We are cancelling our trip to Jamaica  my ILs are trying to get us to go to Europe with them in April, but we will see how I feel and I will chat with my Dr about how long I can travel. 

amylu914

@ajsanders-2 boo, I am sorry you have to cancel your trip! Better safe than sorry. Mexico without tequila wouldn't be as fun, anyways. 

ajsanders-2

@MrsMiller8588 & @amylu914 - I am bummed! So we are basically going to tell our friends this weekend. Thankfully we haven't put any money down on the trip. Europe would be fun, but that's a long flight. Agreed better safe than sorry or an all inclusive wouldn't be as fun either!

mamaabc

@runsomewhere I’d skip the double stroller if I were you. We bought an expensive double stroller when my second was born and hardly used it. My oldest was 12 months at the time, so for that first year I’d often tandem wear the kids. In your case though you probably won’t want to wear your oldest, but he might prefer to walk at that point. I know my 4 year old and 3 year old will not let me stroll them since they think it’s too babyish. 

runsomewhere

abcdmommy said:

@runsomewhere I’d skip the double stroller if I were you. We bought an expensive double stroller when my second was born and hardly used it. My oldest was 12 months at the time, so for that first year I’d often tandem wear the kids. In your case though you probably won’t want to wear your oldest, but he might prefer to walk at that point. I know my 4 year old and 3 year old will not let me stroll them since they think it’s too babyish. 

Thanks. That's what I was thinking. DD usually just walks with us or we put her in a shopping cart when shopping. My only concern is that I'm a runner and while I was on maternity leave with DD I logged a lot of miles walking and running with her in the Bob. I'd like to do the same when #2 arrives. I'm someone that loves to get out and get moving but I'm not sure about longer walks or runs w/o DD in a stroller, even though she will be close to 3. 

adventuresawait1

Any suggestions for more pregnancy-safe cleaning products for bathrooms? I am a big fan of Clorox spray - all that disinfecting power! But we have small enclosed bathroom and my sense is that maybe I shouldn't be using lots of stuff with chemicals. Or is it okay...?

zande2016

So my husband is taking me away this weekend for my birthday, and hinted that he wants to book a massage for me. I'm not sure if I'm 100% comfortable unless I know they're certified in prenatal massage (if he can find a place willing to do 1st trimester massage). I don't really have a midwife/ob to ask because I'm between doctor's and haven't seen anyone yet this pregnancy. Has anyone discussed this with their doctor or have any knowledge about what is/isn't safe? 

christycalifornia

@mrsj1215 I read What to Expect, of course, and also really liked Expecting Better and Debunking the Bump, because I like science and numbers over fear during pregnancy. I'm actually reading them again, because it's been awhile and apparently I don't remember what I wasn't supposed to eat four years ago. I'm a voracious reader, so if you need recs for more specific topics as things go on - breastfeeding, birthing techniques, for example - let me know!

christycalifornia

@zande2016 From what I've read, the likelihood of anything happening from a massage is almost nothing. Most places that are reputable won't do it in the first trimester, though, for fear of lawsuits because if anything DID happen, it would be easy to blame the massage studio. And any reputable place would only do it with a certified prenatal specialist. I'd be wary of any place that didn't, again, not because anything's likely to happen, but because you'd want a place that is on the up and up. I don't know if you've had a prenatal massage before, but the main thing is they massage you on your side to avoid you being on your back (which isn't a huge concern for us at this stage) and avoid certain trigger points that have been known in rare cases to trigger labor. I don't know, if it were me and I could find a good place willing to see me and my doc ok-ed it, I would get a massage in a heartbeat. 

acunamatada

@adventuresawait1 I'm sure there are safer cleaning supplies, but I'm all about the chemicals. I just get it done quickly, crack a window and avoid the bathroom for a couple hours. 

christycalifornia

@runsomewhere I've been driving myself crazy about strollers, too! I'm veering towards what @acunamatada
said, because I literally never use a stroller with my three-year-old any more except on days we'll be out all day, like at the zoo. But I'm worried because when I have the stroller at the zoo, she wants to be in and out of it ALL THE TIME. I'm worried she'll see the baby in the stroller and want to be in it just because it's there. But I still have a BOB I love and an Uppababy umbrella stroller, and I don't want to be the crazy mom with a million strollers, but already the infant seat I want isn't compatible with my BOB and is with a new double stroller, which I know we'll need because the next baby shouldn't be too far after this one..... like I said, I've been driving myself crazy lol. I think I'm going to try the single for now and get a kick-board for my big kid, and get the double early if I HAVE to. I learned last time that spending money early to meet needs you might have just leads to waste. That being said... if you've got someone willing to buy a double FOR you... I'd take it lol.

mrsj1215

christycalifornia said:

@mrsj1215 I read What to Expect, of course, and also really liked Expecting Better and Debunking the Bump, because I like science and numbers over fear during pregnancy. I'm actually reading them again, because it's been awhile and apparently I don't remember what I wasn't supposed to eat four years ago. I'm a voracious reader, so if you need recs for more specific topics as things go on - breastfeeding, birthing techniques, for example - let me know!

I'll definetly have to read those! Thank you.. I have had to google the right things to eat a few times& still worry about if I'm doing/eating all the things I should be(or shouldn't be). And I will definetly get with you later on some more topics.. I have a feeling there will be a lot of things I want to read about and research before this baby gets here!

canucklehead123

How are we all replacing our evening glass of wine? 

michelle_bird

My favorite pregnancy book, by far, was Do Chocolate Lovers Have Sweeter Babies? As someone else mentioned, it's all about science and scientific studies. I found it very interesting! I also liked the Girlfriends Guide to Pregnancy. 

kburg15

@mrsj1215 I love any book by Ina May Gaskin—I can’t remember the one I own, but I felt like she personally got me through labor and delivery (birth center/midwife water birth). 

@zande2016 do you have a massage therapist you usually see? I’ve been going to one specific woman for several years now and she massaged me all through my last pregnancy. Once you start showing or wouldn’t sleep on your stomach, they do the massage on your side. I’m not aware of any first trimester concerns when it comes to massages, though. I personally wouldn’t think twice about it and would just enjoy relaxing

stillziggysmom

acunamatada said:

@MrsMCBMar2014 my son is 2 and still not very verbal, he's too young to understand right now but I'm hoping he'll get it when I start showing. Something that I think is helping is he has his own baby dolls that he loves to take care of.

That's what we did too and it's already helped a lot. My son is obsessed with cars and motorcycles and does NOT slow down or play make believe. I got him an inexpensive baby doll that cries and laughs and gurgle hen you press it's tummy. At first he was confused by it, but now he hugs and kisses it and even tries to share his water bottle with it. The other day I want to his room only to find that he'd gotten out of bed in the night to go get it and sleep with it. It's helpful for us to be able to show him how to hold a baby, too, even though he doesn't greatly get it, he tries. I also just tend to point out every single baby we see to keep them as a constant thought in his little head. 

acunamatada

@d_marie_23 DS has been fascinated with every baby he sees in public. He walked up to one in the lobby of my doctor and just said "oh wow." It was too precious. Getting the doll has definitely helped, and it's sweet seeing him give his babies kisses and put them to sleep. 

izzyp25

@canucklehead123 I like to drink my la croix with a splash of juice (oj, cranberry, grapefruit) in a wine glass. Followed by passing out immediately after my daughter is asleep. 

christycalifornia

@mrsj1215 I can tell you're a reader after my own heart. Any time I need to learn anything or face a new challenge I'm like, ok, what can I read?!