FTM Questions for STM+ - November

MJDsquared

MJDsquared

So, I'm obviously going to wash LO's clothes/blankets/swaddles etc before use. I'm also going to wash fabric covers on anything we got used.

My question is, should I also be washing fabric covers on anything we bought new? Should I be washing any stuffed animals we got new? I'm planning on washing crib sheets, but what about the mattress covers that go under the sheets? Should those be washed before the first use?

flowerpower5838

MJDsquared You may get different answers from others, but beyond their clothes, sheets and blankets I didn't wash anything. I honestly can't remember if I washed the mattress pads or not? Certainly wouldn't hurt. I know I didn't wash stuffed animals. As far as fabric covers, ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ personal preference I guess? I don't think we washed anything that wasn't used.

babybison

Regarding newborn weight, did you weigh your baby at home, or go to a weekly check-in, or just monitor the food/diaper situation? 

skc040512

I just washed clothes/blankets/sheets before use. Most of those are treated with chemicals (to be flame resistant), and it can irritate LOs skin. Washing them breaks the surface chemicals down to lessen the possibility of skin irritation, but the textile fibers remain protected. As far as I know, stuffed animals & the like aren't treated. Unless it's an older item and is dusty, I'd skip. 

Also, pro tip: if you have stuffed animals that need to be washed because they've been in storage but you're afraid it might damage them, put them in a large Ziploc bag and put them in the freezer for 48 hrs (make sure you get most of the air out to prevent crystals from forming). Then you can toss them in the dryer on a low cycle - dust mites are killed via freezing, and the dust is picked up in the dryer!

flowerpower5838

babybison DS lost a bit of weight in the hospital - just under the threshold that allowed him to be released with no issues. He was eating and making the "right" amount of wet diapers at home. We were back at the pediatrician every few days for about 2 weeks I think? Specifically because of the initial weight loss and he was a little jaundiced. Then weekly until a month I think. You didn't ask but here's the rest of the schedule. It does vary from practice to practice I think: 6 weeks and then 2 months, 4 months, 6 months, 9 months, 12 months, 15 months, 18 months, 24 months

splsmama2016

I washed everything except stuffed animals. I can't stand the packaged smell, so it was necessary for me. 

As far as weight goes, we were told to keep an eye on her diapers and the amount she was eating.

tmk0325

Same as @splsmama2016 said.  I washed bedding, clothes, bottles, covers, but didn't bother with stuffed animals since they weren't going to be using them anyway.  Also @skcobb thanks for the tips on the animals, I never knew that! 

anewadventure

@MJDsquared i think partially it is personal preference. even unrelated to baby stuff, i am ADAMANT about washing new things. it blows my mind that people buy clothes and just...wear them. no. wash wash wash. 

so for us, as you might guess, i wash all that stuff..stuffed animals that won't be ruined included. mattress pads, changing table covers, bibs, burp cloths, swaddling blankets, you name it.  

i'm not this way, however, with sterilizing things. do your first-time sterilization for baby products that SPECIFICALLY recommend you do so, like bottles, and then carry on. soap and water. i do recommend those microwave bags (medela makes them for pump parts) as they are handy for bottle nipples, pacifiers, and things you decide need a good zap after a while. 

whiska

Sorry if this has been asked before - do you recommend bringing your breastfeeding pillow to the hospital?  Part of me feels like it's overkill and a FTM dead giveaway, but on the other hand I want to be comfy and would like to learn to nurse with it.

flowerpower5838

@whiska I brought the boppy last time and plan on bringing it again!

anewadventure

@whiska i didn't bring mine last time because i felt stupid about it and that was a mistake. definitely bring it. you're trying to learn how to make BF work and get a good latch whilst under the supervision of a lactation consultant - it helps to have all your "tools" with you. for that matter, have your pump handy so you can get tips on that setup, too!

failuretofly

just catching up on this thread and I say basically ditto for everything @flowerpower5838 said. 

Wash the basics, meh about everything else. And for us DS saw the midwife 3x in the first week, then at 2 weeks, 4 weeks & 6 weeks, then we moved on to our GP for 3 months, 6 months etc every 3 months until 15 months PLUS public health visits at 2, 4, 6 12 & 18 months for check up and immunizations... then I gave up hahahahaha I know I am a terrible mom but whatever, I trust that I know what's going on with him. I'll take him in at 2 for a check up.

cait5413

babybison said:

Regarding newborn weight, did you weigh your baby at home, or go to a weekly check-in, or just monitor the food/diaper situation? 

Just monitored diapers, though I definitely had anxiety about this. When bfing it is really hard (for me at least) to feel sure baby is getting "enough." DD never had a weight problem though. 

ashtynmo

Our baby seems to be quite active. Does the baby continue to move the same amount during the entire laboring process? Can you tell that the baby is moving during contractions?

skc040512

@ashtynmo DD was super active, but began to slow down in the last couple weeks of pregnancy, since she was running out of room. I vaguely remember feeling her move while I was in early stages of labor, but once the contractions are coming close together, the contractions are really all you feel. 

Edited for clarity

failuretofly

@ashtynmo Yup baby moves throughout labor! I remember wondering this too and my midwife asked me regularly throughout if I was feeling baby move. 

whiska

This feels like an incredibly stupid question, but is there a proper technique for sneezing at this point?  I'm starting to have pain again, especially at the top of my bump (or maybe that was baby kicking/stretching there from being startled?)  

babybison

@whiska I try to hold the bottom of my bump when I sneeze, but earlier I mistimed it mid-sneeze and basically judo chopped my belly. And it helps if I'm sitting up instead of reclining. 

kaylawing

@whiskaI didn't have my boppy with my last time and I have already packed it for the hospital this time.  As others have said, you might as well have everything you need to help you learn and make it comfortable. 

kyrwyn

@whiska I don't know the proper protocol but I've noticed I sort of squeeze everything down there as double protection against snissing and then also hold the bottom of my bump, like @babybison mentioned.

splsmama2016

Anyone else having pains under their breasts but above the bump? My dr said it was the skin stretching, but its not the skin, it feels like the muscle. What about leaky boobs? This shit is annoying.

I've given up hope in not snissing at this point. I broke out the panty liners a couple weeks ago because of it, but I still find myself clenching and crossing my legs (as best as I can haha) when sneezing. 

I doubt I'll bring the boppy unless DH wants it. 

When is everyone starting red raspberry leaf tea, if you're drinking it? I can't remember when I started with DD1.

skc040512

Leaky boobs over here. It's getting annoying as crap because it's so little, it doesn't leave any spots, but I can feel it so I'm super self conscious about it

shellac835

@splsmama2016 I started drinking red raspberry leaf tea after I hit 20 weeks, but not a super strong brew. Tomorrow (36 weeks) I'm planning to start drinking it daily and at a much stronger brew. Gotta get my uterus in shape! 

STM's, if you got stretch marks when did they show up? I know this is just a vanity question, but if I don't have them at 36 weeks am I probably in the clear, or could they still pop up at this point? I'm feeling some anxiety about my post-partum body and am hoping that's one thing I can comfort myself with.

anewadventure

@splsmama2016 i had that pain REALLY BAD last pregnancy, not as bad this time around. it's not your skin. my doc and my physical therapist both said it was your connective tissue at the base of your ribs getting stretched out by your growing uterus. there's nothing you can do about it. mine actually got so bad that one of the upper muscles in my abdomen would detach and curl up. it happens regularly even three years later and it hurts SO BAD. FX you get through without that added joy!

@shellac835 it's definitely still possible to get them right at the end, since you're still getting bigger. however, as a person who is prone to pregnancy stretch marks (you'd never believe what my abdomen looks like ), mine started very very early and continued to appear throughout. so it's a good sign for you that you don't have any yet. 

blueskies17

@splsmama2016 I had similar under breast muscle pain a couple of weeks ago. It went away after I switched to a bigger bra that doesn't have underwire! Haven't gone without underwire since high school, but desperate times call for desperate measures.

Tennis11785

@splsmama2016 yeah I'm so over the leaky boobs. I can't go braless around the house anymore or I have these huge spots on my shirts. I've got like 5 sets of bamboobies and I want to order 20 more so I'm not constantly washing them. 

skc040512

@shellac835 I had gotten away with minimal stretch marks this pregnancy until last week (33/34 weeks) LO has made herself comfy on my right side and I'm constantly visibly lopsided. I noticed the other day I've got a new group of marks right where her butt is, all the way up into my ribs. whomp whomp

whiska

@splsmama2016 I had that really bad around 33-34 weeks.  It felt like muscle stretching because the tissue was so strong and thick - I could follow it with my fingers coming off of my chest wall on either side of the lower sternum (where it's supposed to be!) and stretching away down toward the bump.  It was really taut.  It feels a lot better this week (35 weeks yesterday).

On this note I'm starting to make a lot of modifications during yoga; baby's getting heavy and everything feels like it's stretching faster than my body can keep up!  

failuretofly

Can anyone guess what I'm going to suggest @splsmama2016 do about her snissing?? 

elcd458

@shellac835 Good question! I've been wondering the same thing! I've been the stretch mark queen since puberty but haven't seen any preggo-related ones on my abdomen yet and I'm just praying they'll stay away.  The woman in the birthing video we watched last week had horrible huge angry red stretch marks and I was like 

cait5413

@shellac835 I didn't get any new stretch marks with DD until the last week of my pregnancy. I was pretty annoyed I made it so far and then still got them!

@whiska I brought the boppy--just left it in the car til DD was out and we were breastfeeding regularly. 

babybison

@shellac835 I had the same question because right now they're only on my boobs and my boobs are going to get all funky regardless. Every day I check on my bump, but I can't see underneath. 
DH has them on his hips/butt from a growth spurt he had in 5th grade and it makes me laugh to see stretch marks on such a skinny guy. I don't want him to laugh at me 

shellac835

@cait5413 Ahh, that's what I'm worried about! Good to know I shouldn't bank on not getting any at this point, but I'll cross my fingers.
@babybison Lol, It seems more acceptable to make fun of him for 5th grade stretch marks than for him to laugh at your for pregnancy ones, so hopefully if you end up with them he's kind (and hopefully you just don't get any!)
@skcobb Mine has also been very settled in on my right side and his bottom is constantly pushing out up by the right side of my ribs.  Super lopsided but fortunately no marks yet...here's hoping!

elcd458

How can you guys tell what body parts of baby are where? I have always had pregnant friends be like "oh, there's his butt" or "I feel her foot right there" but I have no clue what sort of lumps and bumps are what.

MJDsquared

@elcd458 I'll be over here waiting for that response like:

My guess is the large lump I can see/feel that makes my bump lopsided a lot is her butt, but I really have no idea.

skc040512

@elcd458 I usually say "butt" because it's near where I feel "kicks" rather than "punches". For all I know, it's her head 

failuretofly

I know baby's butt is in my ribs because my midwife has confirmed at the last 3 appointments that she's head down... plus you can feel it! It's kind of pointy and boney whereas her head down low is round and hard

shellac835

@elcd458 and @MJDsquared that's a good question! I'm a FTM and am quite certain of his position but it's hard to explain how I know. I guess I know he's head down because my midwife confirmed it, and there's always this obviously large part of his body that protrudes out by my right rib.  I don't feel kicks or smaller parts on that side but I do on the left, so I can deduce that he's laying head down on the right and facing to the left.  The amount that he pushes his bottom out makes it hard to not know what it is, but occasionally he'll shift into a position and I can't quite identify what's where.  I've heard of Belly Mapping (haven't done it) which is supposed to help you figure out the position based on different movements, so maybe you could try that? 
https://spinningbabies.com/learn-more/baby-positions/belly-mapping/

whiska

@elcd458 I have been googling this since like week 25!  I guess that it's feet I'm feeling at the top of the bump because they're so much stronger than any other jabs, but it's seriously just a guess!  Like @MJDsquared I am over here like: STMs, 

elcd458

LOL, glad it's not just me then.  I keep waiting for the creepy alien foot protrusions and whanot but I have an anterior placenta (and I'm chubby!) so I'm starting to think that won't happen.  As long as she's moving, I'm good.  I haven't had any kind of US or pelvic exam in months, so who knows where she is! 

Side note: she's way more active during the night than during the day. Does that mean she's likely to have her days and nights mixed up when she's born?