Heartbroken to be here, again

40momma · October 2017

This part really really sucks. I really wish I could come back here to join your grad board with a successful story and offer you ladies hope. But sadly that's not the case.
After 3 losses, how do you ever find the strength to try again. Or when do you simply give up. After my first loss I knew I still had a good chance of being successful. After my second I figured I simply had really bad luck. But after my third, I know that this will never be easy for me. And how much heartbreak can one couple take. I'm now struggling with wondering if the two of us will ever be enough.

pumpkinpancake · October 2017

Oh @40momma I’m so sorry that you’re back here. There are no words that can really help when you have to deal with another loss, but you have whatever support here that you need. Unfortunately I don’t have the answers to your questions, but I hope that things can get better for you. Thinking of you.

leahcimmichael · October 2017

@40momma I’m so sorry that you’re back. It’s just not fair! Were here for you.

Mack2342 · October 2017

@40momma I’m so sorry to see you back here.

amberruka · October 2017

@40momma I'm so heartbroken for you. That is so incredibly unfair. Big squishy internet hugs. We're here for you to vent, anytime.

Kath525 · October 2017

Oh no @40momma ! I'm so so sorry for your loss... It's all so unfair. You are in my thoughts.

fishee333 · October 2017

Oh no, my heart broke when I saw you posted. I am so so sorry. I don't have the answers, but I'm here for you.

MelissaMay82 · October 2017

@40momma I am so sorry for your loss.

jchpg · October 2017

@40momma I was so sad to see your name on this post. My heart aches for you. I’m so sorry. We’re here for you.

tosh24 · October 2017

Oh I'm so sorry to see you back here

Multiple losses are so unfair. We're here for you.

vlagrl29 · October 2017

I hate to see you come back here again

I'm so sorry. I would get testing done if you haven't regarding the losses to see if they can find anything.

40momma · October 2017

Thank you ladies. As much as it sucks to be back here, its comforting to know there's a great group of ladies here that can understand and provide support. Before I got pregnant this last time I had an appt for a hysteroscopy to check my uterus for abnormalities but we didn't get to it yet. I'll go back to request this again. I've had a number of blood tests (all fine) and DH and I both had chromosome tests done (won't find results for some time). DH and I have had a few really great talks about where to go from here. He feels we haven't explored all of our options yet (mainly getting any answers from the hysteroscopy) so he hasn't given up hope yet.

vlagrl29 · October 2017

It's good to have a plan @40momma - glad you have that

cassafrass15 · October 2017

@40momma I'm so sorry to hear about your loss. I am also a RPL sufferer, as are too many of us on this board I think, so please know that we feel your pain and share in your frustration. Sounds like you have a supportive husband and a plan - let those things ground you.

sprkls8506 · October 2017

@40momma I am so sorry for your loss. I hope you are able to get some answers.

honeybeebub · October 2017

@40momma I am so heartbroken to see you back here and so sorry for your loss. As someone with RPL myself, it is devastating and rips all the trust and happiness out of things. I am hopeful for you that the hysteroscopy will give you some answers with a clear path forward. Maybe it will end up being the septum, which has really good outcomes once removed. By the way this is msstephanielynn - I had to update my UN with Bump issues.

ELeighMay · October 2017

@40momma My heart hurts for you today. I'm so sorry you're back here again, and am very sorry for your loss.

dpjennifer · October 2017

40momma I'm so sorry. I understand what you're going through, as I felt similarly. The first MC was "well, this actually happens a lot and doesn't mean anything." The second was "Well, 2 in a row doesn't necessarily mean there's a problem." The 3rd was upsetting, but at least I knew I'd qualify for testing. The 4th was devastating to me.
Are you looking at doing any more testing? It's hard when all of the 'easy' stuff is ruled out, since after those tests, most of the time RPL is unexplained. It's a giant shite sandwich.
Please take some time for yourself. Also, I know it helped me to look at what my life without babies would be like. This was incredibly hard for me at first, but once I pictured a happy life even without kids, I was better able to face that as a possible reality without sobbing every 5 seconds. Knowing that I could travel and do a million amazing things, that hopefully my sister will have kids and I could use my maternal instincts to be the best aunt in the entire world, that I have my dog/son that is the most amazing collie in the world and he is like my son to me... these things all help me to cope. (As does my AMAZING therapist... )
girl disney hug adorable pixar GIF