Any STM+ taking any classes? We are on the fence about it. We want to take my 5 year old to a "big brother" class, but we're also thinking of refresher courses for us. The problem is that they are at really bad times for having other kids. We have no family nearby and *confession time* we have never used a babysitter. My husband is dead set against having a stranger in the house when we are not home. Is it worth it going to a refresher as a STM?
I opted to do the Hypnobabies home study course with my second, and enjoyed it, though I was already very familiar with a lot of its philosophy. I didn't use the hypnoanesthesia during labor/birth, though I was prepared to if I thought I needed it. A traditional childbirth course wasn't anywhere on my radar. My fifth was my husband's first and we were planning another homebirth. I made sure to provide a lot of information and education throughout the pregnancy, and he attended a few of my midwife visits that last 45-60 minutes, on average. For being new to it all, he set up the birth tub and got everything ready. He knew what to do. I wouldn't have texted my midwife when I did had he not really encouraged it, since I was pretty skeptical and in denial.
"Maybe you should let R know you're having contractions."
"Nah. They're like BH, not painful or regular, so it's probably nothing like before."
"But your water has been broken since last night (started leaking), so maybe it's something. You've been 5 cm for a week."
"It doesn't feel like labor at all."
I was especially hesitant because it was Thanksgiving and hated the idea of burdening her when I wasn't convinced anything was happening yet. But I texted her letting her know I was feeling what felt like prodromal labor, but nothing to get excited about. She and her apprentice came over just in case it turned into something. Still felt fine even after I got into the tub. It definitely felt nice and took pressure off my pelvic floor since she was at 0 station, but I wasn't "laboring."
But he was right, I guess, because 35 minutes later my midwife checked me and found out, to our shock, that I was 8 cm and +2. Surprise! She was born maybe five minutes later. I barely noticed contractions at that time (were mild and irregular), but felt pressure at times, but my midwife could feel them.
But I'm high risk this time and will be induced at the hospital, so we're going to do a tour at some point because I'm planning another med-free birth and want to get a feel for the environment and their options.
G 12.04 | E 11.06 | D 11.08 | H 12.09 | R 11.14 | Expecting #6 2.16.18.
I don't know if this is a symptom, a need to bitch, or something else, but I need to vent so I'm putting it here... I am SO irritable today and overwhelmed today. It is totally hitting me how much we need to do to get ready for this baby and I don't know if DS is handling it better than me, if he's in denial, or if he's just focusing on work this week because he has a big deadline today. I could start to take care of it all myself (because as @eggplantface said, stepping up when we need to is what women do), but I feel like a) I would be setting a bad precedent of not including DH in certain decisions and b) he will just be totally overwhelmed when the baby gets here if he is not part of the process. I also have a ton of paperwork to get done for work that I am struggling to stay on top of before it gets out of hand. Unfortunately, the midnight grading sessions just aren't an option any more because I'm so freaking tired.
@babybro218 I'm irritable this week too. Just NOT feeling it. However, this is our first baby, and we've done absolutely nothing to prepare aside from a registry because I have a baby shower this weekend. I'm not sure what I'm supposed to have done by now, but I haven't done any of it either. You're not alone!
@babybro218 I know a first baby is overwhelming but trust me when I say as long as the baby has a place to sleep, you have a plan for feeding and changing and clothes. Your fine. My first didn’t even go in his nursery for the first 4 months. Maybe to change him but realistically we used the bed, floor, or couch. It really depended on where I was and what I was doing. It will come together
@babybro218 I know a first baby is overwhelming but trust me when I say as long as the baby has a place to sleep, you have a plan for feeding and changing and clothes. Your fine. My first didn’t even go in his nursery for the first 4 months. Maybe to change him but realistically we used the bed, floor, or couch. It really depended on where I was and what I was doing. It will come together
Thank you, @SunflowerMama428 . I needed to remember that. We're not having a shower, but my family (ok, my mother and my aunt) keep telling me I need to start a registry just to make purchasing everything easier afterwards. What I really need is to tune out the noise of family and co-workers.
@babybro218 when I was pregnant with DD I had this urgency to get everything done and DH was more like "we have time". I also wanted him to care about things like the crib and the nursery theme etc. It really frustrated me that he didn't seem as in to it as I was and I worried about what that meant when baby came. At the end of the day none of it mattered. He loved her the second he saw her and all the things I had gotten frustrated about seemed SO silly because like @SunflowerMama428 said we changed her wherever, not always on the changing table I stressed about. She slept in our room for 2 months, not in the adorable elephant themed nursery I agonized over. They just do and come to things in their own way.
@babybro218 I know a first baby is overwhelming but trust me when I say as long as the baby has a place to sleep, you have a plan for feeding and changing and clothes. Your fine. My first didn’t even go in his nursery for the first 4 months. Maybe to change him but realistically we used the bed, floor, or couch. It really depended on where I was and what I was doing. It will come together
Thank you, @SunflowerMama428 . I needed to remember that. We're not having a shower, but my family (ok, my mother and my aunt) keep telling me I need to start a registry just to make purchasing everything easier afterwards. What I really need is to tune out the noise of family and co-workers.
I have an amazon registry stuff we’re already going to have to buy. I figured I might as well get the completion discount.
Because it “inhibits others from being able to enjoy the site.”
So does blatantly not caring about others and what they are experiencing as well as trivializing their losses.
So I guess the powers that be only want complete newbie a-holes on here. Those are the ones they seem determined to protect while punishing the established regulars who follow the g-d rules.
****TW Signature****
DD born 04/28/2002 Married DH 03/25/2017 1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017 BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
Because it “inhibits others from being able to enjoy the site.”
So does blatantly not caring about others and what they are experiencing as well as trivializing their losses.
So I guess the powers that be only want complete newbie a-holes on here. Those are the ones they seem determined to protect while punishing the established regulars who follow the g-d rules.
Apparently so. Let’s protect someone who is clearly inflicting wounds on a lot of women on the boards with her words and give anyone who said trying to her a warning.
Here's the thing: TB wants to not drive newbs away. I understand that. What i dont think they understand is that by protecting those who refuse to follow the rules they are protecting people who will NEVER become longtime community members. Those ones who post AW or stir up crap and never heard from again? They didn't GBCB because we called them on it. They were never going to be a part of this anyway. Maybe we just need to start reporting their posts. (Then we'd get dinged for reporting things that aren't violations.)
****TW Signature****
DD born 04/28/2002 Married DH 03/25/2017 1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017 BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
@TattoosandLace I'm mad they removed what you wrote, because it explained so perfectly what needed to be said. And I've come to the conclusion that people who have no empathy in these situations are plain ignorant. And they aren't worth wasting time on. The only thing that might make them understand is experiencing it first hand, but I obviously wouldn't wish that on anyone.
*TW* Spoiler
Me: 33 DH:30 DD: Aug '16 10/2017: Twins confirmed with TTTS at 22 weeks. 10/10/17 Twin B passed after in utero surgery 11/2/17 Twin A & B born 11/26/17: Twin A passed after 24 days fighting in the NICU Benched 6 months BFP: 6/28/18 MC:7/16/18 BO BFP: 10/2/18 EDD 6/15/18
It’s all about the newbs and getting more members so they can tell advertisers X people use the site and therefore give them money. Nevermind there’s a difference between registered users and actual community members who come back. Maybe they want the “unique” page clicks more than volume.
Me: late 30s | H: early 30s TTC #1 since April 2015 RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016 IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal Polyp removed May 2017 FET May 2017 - BFP! Baby boy born 2/2/18
@neener*neener* praying for you! @TattoosandLace what did you say? I’ve been checked out all weekend and am behind. What’s up with June and the craziness?!
Hey Ladies- Thank you all SO MUCH for the support/prayers/comments. It brightened my evening reading your messages.
I called my doctor today and left a message with the nurse. They called me back this afternoon to say that at 22 weeks there is no proof that bed rest helps and that I did all of the right things (laying on my left side, resting, drinking water etc... etc...). I am also supposed to call back if anything gets worse and go to L&D if it happens again and I can't stop it by using the steps mentioned above. I am glad that she didn't just rush it and put me on bed rest if not needed BUT if it happens again I will insist that she do an internal check to make sure I am not dilating.
I feel a lot better today. Still have had BH on and off. I had my students come to me today and did a lot of teaching from my rocking chair.
Thank you again for the support. You ladies are awesome!
@neener*neener* , hugs, friend! I hope you get some good news. I agree with the others that the way healthcare and maternity leave work is so frustrating at times. I can imagine that the stress of balancing taking care of the baby and also financially preparing for the baby is a lot.
@meatballs37 , it's nice to see you again. I've been thinking of you, and keeping up on the blog.
@neener*neener* yay, so glad you weren't put on bed rest and that you're feeling better! Hope your Braxton Hicks let off soon.
My random, I've been looking forward to my prenatal massage yesterday for the past 2 weeks. It's this traditional Chinese masseuse who just opened her practice in our town and everyone's been raving about her, so I was really hoping she would be able to help my sciatica and shoulder pain. Even though I had told her previously that I was pregnant, she waited until I was on the table to tell me that she couldn't apply much pressure because I was pregnant. She may as well have just touched me with a feather for the full hour, and I may have silently cried into the massage table. The weirdest part is, she also tucked my underwear into a wedgie and proceded to massage my butt for 10 minutes. Is that normal in traditional Chinese massages??
@neener*neener* glad to hear you are feeling better i hope the BH ease off and you are able to keep working. Bed rest is honestly my biggest fear, for the financial stress alone.
Re: Random week of 10/16
"Maybe you should let R know you're having contractions."
"Nah. They're like BH, not painful or regular, so it's probably nothing like before."
"But your water has been broken since last night (started leaking), so maybe it's something. You've been 5 cm for a week."
"It doesn't feel like labor at all."
I was especially hesitant because it was Thanksgiving and hated the idea of burdening her when I wasn't convinced anything was happening yet. But I texted her letting her know I was feeling what felt like prodromal labor, but nothing to get excited about. She and her apprentice came over just in case it turned into something. Still felt fine even after I got into the tub. It definitely felt nice and took pressure off my pelvic floor since she was at 0 station, but I wasn't "laboring."
But he was right, I guess, because 35 minutes later my midwife checked me and found out, to our shock, that I was 8 cm and +2. Surprise! She was born maybe five minutes later. I barely noticed contractions at that time (were mild and irregular), but felt pressure at times, but my midwife could feel them.
But I'm high risk this time and will be induced at the hospital, so we're going to do a tour at some point because I'm planning another med-free birth and want to get a feel for the environment and their options.
DD born 04/28/2002
Married DH 03/25/2017
1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017
BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
I am SO irritable today and overwhelmed today. It is totally hitting me how much we need to do to get ready for this baby and I don't know if DS is handling it better than me, if he's in denial, or if he's just focusing on work this week because he has a big deadline today. I could start to take care of it all myself (because as @eggplantface
said, stepping up when we need to is what women do), but I feel like a) I would be setting a bad precedent of not including DH in certain decisions and b) he will just be totally overwhelmed when the baby gets here if he is not part of the process. I also have a ton of paperwork to get done for work that I am struggling to stay on top of before it gets out of hand. Unfortunately, the midnight grading sessions just aren't an option any more because I'm so freaking tired.
DD born 04/28/2002
Married DH 03/25/2017
1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017
BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
ETA: That was the thread right?
in all seriousness it really pisses me off that her comments are still there and nearly all the responses were removed for “TOU Violations”.
DD born 04/28/2002
Married DH 03/25/2017
1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017
BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
DD born 04/28/2002
Married DH 03/25/2017
1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017
BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
DD: Aug '16
10/2017: Twins confirmed with TTTS at 22 weeks.
10/10/17 Twin B passed after in utero surgery
11/2/17 Twin A & B born
11/26/17: Twin A passed after 24 days fighting in the NICU
Benched 6 months
BFP: 6/28/18 MC:7/16/18 BO
BFP: 10/2/18 EDD 6/15/18
TTC #1 since April 2015
RE Dx: Fibroids, surgery Jan 2016
IUI #1 and #2, Nov/Dec 2016, BFN
IVF March 2017: ER - 5R/3M/3F, 1 PGS normal
Polyp removed May 2017
FET May 2017 - BFP!
Baby boy born 2/2/18
Can't wait to tell DH he's "Customer Man".
DD born 04/28/2002
Married DH 03/25/2017
1st MMC 08/13/2016 2nd MMC 02/14/2017
BFP 06/16/17 Rainbow DS Born 02/05/2018
I called my doctor today and left a message with the nurse. They called me back this afternoon to say that at 22 weeks there is no proof that bed rest helps and that I did all of the right things (laying on my left side, resting, drinking water etc... etc...). I am also supposed to call back if anything gets worse and go to L&D if it happens again and I can't stop it by using the steps mentioned above. I am glad that she didn't just rush it and put me on bed rest if not needed BUT if it happens again I will insist that she do an internal check to make sure I am not dilating.
I feel a lot better today. Still have had BH on and off. I had my students come to me today and did a lot of teaching from my rocking chair.
Thank you again for the support. You ladies are awesome!
@meatballs37 , it's nice to see you again. I've been thinking of you, and keeping up on the blog.
My random, I've been looking forward to my prenatal massage yesterday for the past 2 weeks. It's this traditional Chinese masseuse who just opened her practice in our town and everyone's been raving about her, so I was really hoping she would be able to help my sciatica and shoulder pain. Even though I had told her previously that I was pregnant, she waited until I was on the table to tell me that she couldn't apply much pressure because I was pregnant. She may as well have just touched me with a feather for the full hour, and I may have silently cried into the massage table. The weirdest part is, she also tucked my underwear into a wedgie and proceded to massage my butt for 10 minutes. Is that normal in traditional Chinese massages??