Tw*twaffle Tuesday 10/10

lund

Who's the vagina pastry in your life today???

lund

*prefaced to say that this is totally FWP, and I know that it's my fault for asking for people to guess

Anywho, before we announced the sex on FB and Insta, I posted a pic of the sex reveal golf ball that had blue and pink question marks on it with the caption "Anyone want to take a guess?"  It was fun, a ton of people guessed, yadda yadda yadda. 

When we posted the sex reveal, most people were great - just saying "congrats" etc. but of course there were the handful of people who had to say "I KNEW it!" or "I was right!!!" Again, totally my fault for opening myself up to it and asking everyone to guess, but cool, make the sex of my child about you. News flash cocky people, you had a 50/50 chance of being right. Calm down, you're not Nostradamus. 



I have no idea why this bugs me so much

angiek1

I am on a call with my AE and if he tries to get my team to work on a client pitch with a set budget one more time I might scream. Dude, do your job. A client can’t be serious about a project without a real budget set. Makes me want to scream. 

MrsF1017

@lund that would irritate me too. I'm currently dealing with the "well, you have to try for a girl one more time" and " man, I was really hoping you were finally having a girl". It's bad enough I've had to help myself through the feeling of disappoint of having another boy. Which I'm mostly ok with now. But seriously??? Who gives you the right to tell me that I have to try for a girl again. First of all, everyone knows we're done. There's not going to be another one.  Second of all, are you going to help support a fourth child? Because there is a reason we are stopping at 3. Kids are expensive. Also, we'd probably just end up with another boy. And then What? Are you going to tell me to have a fifth child because you wanted me to have a girl. 

It's mostly family saying these things. My niece (who is 23) was the last girl to be born in my family. I'm sorry but obviously I'm not the only who had a problem adding another girl to the family. 

End of rant.

BarefootContessa

I just want to vote my MIL off the island... Can I do that?

scuba_chic

@lund I'm totally waiting for people to say that too.  Whats funny is EVERYONE has guessed boy, so the person/persons who says "I knew it" and it happens to be "right" is not going to have much bragging rights because EVERYONE "knows" its a boy lol.  

scuba_chic

Everyone who is sick is the TW in my life today and my office is full of them.  I know its not their fault but I seriously do not want a bug.  I got the flu shot last week, but supposedly it takes 2 weeks for it to start shielding me. I need a bubble to walk around in for a while. 

bchalm

@lund @MrsF1017 I'm with y'all! When I told my MIL we were having a girl, her reaction was oh ok, I have to go make dinner now. LIKE WHAT??? then throughout the pregnancy swore the blood test was wrong. She also was convinced I was having twins until literally I had given birth. Both DH's parents have said if this one isn't a boy we have to have another, yeah ok. Are you carrying and taking care of this extra child? So that's another reason we are team green. I literally could care less and I don't want to deal with the reactions.

Dumbgurl04

@lund that is so frustrating. We are having a gender reveal party so I kind of want to let people guess and whoever is right give them all a cookie.  Cause that is usually my response when someone brags about being right.   I also hate when people tell me they hope I have a girl and she is super girly.  I'm not very girly so for some reason they find this hilarious.  

lund

@Dumbgurl04 LOLOLOL at the cookie idea. I should just post that everyone who was right gets to buy baby and I an extra gift or something. 
People who have an opinion about what sex you "should" have or that they "hope" (@mrsf1017) you have should have to help pay your medical bills. 

MrsF1017

@lund yes!! They act as if I have control over it. Sorry you're disappointed I'm not having the sex you wanted me to have. How about you go have another baby. 

whatabout2ndbreakfast

My MIL already told me she wants a girl. There's other layers to this but basically my SIL's boyfriend has a daughter, and MIL is always buying her clothes - like every holiday she gets her a new holiday outfit. She doesn't buy DS clothes ever and I'm not sure if it's because she doesn't like boy clothes or if she really just favors girls? I don't know.

My tomato soup is a TW because I spilled it all over my hand and burnt myself

lanieg81

@BarefootContessa I'm going to have to agree with you on this one except not my MIL yet but my boyfriends mom and well sister too. I. Just. Can't. with them!

ngolimento

@lund I get where you are coming from.  My in-laws played the "I knew it!" game with my first kid, and got all weird about it.  Like, they then pronounced when the kid would be born, down to the hour.  They honest-to-god believed they has psychic powers or some crap.  The absolute most grating part is my MIL's prediction was for DD to come early. why the hell would you wish for that?  She like to Yammer on and on about how all her babies were early and oh so small (yeah, you smoked like crazy, you stupid twat).

It was an excellent consolation prize to go waaaaay over my due date just to stick it to her.  And this time they all declared with their mystical powers I would have a boy.  In your face, in-laws!!

lund

ngolimento said:

@lund I get where you are coming from.  My in-laws played the "I knew it!" game with my first kid, and got all weird about it.  Like, they then pronounced when the kid would be born, down to the hour.  They honest-to-god believed they has psychic powers or some crap.  The absolute most grating part is my MIL's prediction was for DD to come early. why the hell would you wish for that?  She like to Yammer on and on about how all her babies were early and oh so small (yeah, you smoked like crazy, you stupid twat).

It was an excellent consolation prize to go waaaaay over my due date just to stick it to her.  And this time they all declared with their mystical powers I would have a boy.  In your face, in-laws!!

Oh I would've killed your ILs!  My mom pulls this kind of crap too, and she also legit believes that she's somewhat psychic .... which is a whole other can of worms. So, I totally get the smug satisfaction when they're wrong.

Maybe the most infuriating part is when anyone else thinks that they have some sort of magic connection to my kid or my body.  Like nope, you're just crazy and delusional. Keep your self proclaimed spidey senses away from me and my baby. 

ekendall09

+1 to the crazy mom/MIL list.  My mom has "premonitions" about the sex of our babies (my siblings too).  And also wishes things like I hope you're over a week late so we can have the same birthday.  I cannot.

lindsye

@MrsF1017 I hated that stuff from people too. When we were pregnant with #3 the nearly universal response from people who did not know us well was "oh, trying for a boy?" People are now completely befuddled about why we're having a fourth kid (for a number of very rational reasons, ha) but we've already gotten a couple "why do you need another one? You already have a boy and 2 girls" or "oh, trying to even the score?" 

Dude. There are people who want another kid because they want another human being in their family regardless of sex, so just stop it.

ngolimento

@ekendall09 what is up with people wishing that kind of stuff just for a stupid date?  This baby is due close to my BILs birthday, and everyone is pushing for us to go late to hit it, and to name the baby after him (before we knew the sex).  Since BIL is named after FIL, which is an insanely awful person, I would rather cut off a toe than attach his name to my kid.

whatabout2ndbreakfast

@ngolimento my MIL predicted DS would be huge and I'd need a c-section. Also, why would you wish for that? I did not need a c-section and DS was moderately large but not huge

kaymaroo

Everyone who knows I'm pregnant thinks this baby is a girl. Tbh I think so too, but I know it's a 50/50 shot of being right. My mom is the only one who thinks it's a boy. If she's right she will 100% believe God told her I'm having a boy (she tends to believe God tells her things about the future). I'm seriously hoping it's a girl just so I don't have to hear "I KNEW it!" for the rest of my life.

ekendall09

@ngolimento makes zero sense.  Apparently getting pregnant opens you up to all sort of opinions you never knew you wanted.  

kaymaroo

The TW in my life is, as usual, my ex-husband. DH and I had planned a family vacation to the apple orchard next weekend and I told my ex we were going to be out of town. He then told me he was planning a vacation with his wife's family to the exact same place that same weekend and my son would be going with them and not us. I refuse to budge because he does this EVERY time I try to take a vacation with DS and if I let him get away with it we would never be able to go anywhere.

Legally he has no right to keep DS from going with us and he knows it, so aside from whining and asking me to change my plans every day, there's nothing he can really do. But while DS was with my ex this past weekend DS called me very upset that I was "taking him away" from his dad and his cousins. My ex plans things on my weekends all the time and I tell DS it's okay and he'll have fun with his dad and we'll make it up to him, etc. etc. But when it's the other way around my ex pulls DS into it to try to manipulate me to give in to what he wants.

Sorry for the novel. Upsetting DS on purpose to get his way is just too much for me to handle.

BarefootContessa

@kaymaroo that sucks. I'm so sorry you have to deal with that.

ekendall09

@kaymaroo do you all have a custody and vaction schedule?  

I only ask because ours is very detailed and leaves nothing in question.  Each of us can ask for 2 vacation weeks a year that go through the other parents days.  Outside of that we can ask the other parent for a day that theirs to go to special events but legally don't have to say yes.  We try and stay civil so DD can attend events and be able to spend time accordingly with both sides of the family.

irenejean

@kaymaroo That's awful and I'm sorry you have to deal with that. I'd be so upset in your shoes too.

stalkinghorse

@kaymaroo using a child's emotions to get back at you is unreal selfish and immature. I am so sorry. No one should have to be managing a pregnancy, a tiny human and an asshat masquerading as a grown man. Hold your ground and have the best time in his honor...what a jerk. 

kaymaroo

@BarefootContessa @irenejean @stalkinghorse Thanks guys. I can live with it but I hate it for DS.

@ekendall09 Yes, thanks to a ridiculously contentious divorce we have a really detailed agreement. We can each use 10 vacation days (during the other parent's custodial time) per year. We alternate years on who can "veto" requests and this year is my year. Last year was his and I didn't get a single vacation day because of it. I've already let him have a bunch of days this year, but now he's saying I can't use any vacation days this year either (even though he has no legal right this year to say that). Legally it's all very cut and dry, which is why he's resorted to using DS to get his way.

lindsye

That sounds absolutely heartbreaking, @kaymaroo. I'm so sorry you and DS have to go through that nonsense regularly.

ekendall09

@kaymaroo add me to the ugly divorce hence the extreme detail.  I'm so sorry he's using DS against you, that is awful for him and of course you.  

kaymaroo

@lindsye Thank you. The sad thing is that after 5 years of this BS I'm used to it by now. I only really lose it when it hurts DS.

@ekendall09 I'm sorry you've been through the wringer too! It sounds like you guys are trying to get along for your daughter and I think that's awesome. We're in  court-ordered coparenting therapy right now because it got so bad, but it's not really helping. It's like the more I give in to his requests and try to compromise, the more he demands. The only thing that puts an end to it is refusing everything, but I hate doing that to DS.

ekendall09

@kaymaroo it doesn't sound like he puts DS in front of feelings toward/dealing with you.  I hope for DS sake he figures it out and stops making you do all the compromising, it's supposed to go both ways!

Dumbgurl04

@kaymaroo that is disgusting that he is using DS against you like that.  I understand sometimes ex just can't get along but when they drag their kids into the mess that's just hurting the kids.  Sorry you have to watch your DS be put through this. 

okayrunner

@kaymaroo, that is awful. I'm sorry you and your DS have to go through that. 

@MrsF1017, I can relate to how you feel. Everyone keeps telling me they hope I'm having a girl. Given DH's history, it's likely we will have another boy. My DS is amazing and I think another one would be great, but it feels like I'll be letting people down and it makes me feel like I don't want to tell anyone when we find out if it's a boy again and just wait until he arrives.

@ngolimento, that would annoy me too. I remember when I was pregnant with DS, everyone would comment "you'll never make it until May." I guess because I was so huge. But it upset. Why wish prematurity on someone like that?!

bettyvonsomethingstein

On the topic of sex predictions, I had a man approach me yesterday when I had my two boys in tow and say, "Oh, wow, three boys!"  I just looked at him mystified, and he pointed to my belly and said, "That's a boy, right?  Or is that leftover from the last one?  I can tell it's a boy."  **disclaimer, I'm not sure of the correct term to use, but this man obviously had some kind of awkwardness to him that made me think he has some kind of autism.  Anyway, it was such an odd encounter.  I wasn't upset by it, just, like truly mystified.  I mean, he was right, and he was super confident that he was right.  But how????

ngolimento

@bettyvonsomethingstein, how awkward!  Statistically speaking, he is right though .  The more you have of the same sex, the more likely the next baby is the same.  Either that or he has x-ray vision.

lesliegolem

@lindsye oh I know those comments drive me crazy! When we told people we were having a 3rd especially my in laws said "oh hopefully you get your boy this time" or "you better have a boy to pass on our last name." Of course when we found out its a boy they're acting like I'm having the second coming. Its frustrating. Of course my MIL recommended that we could name the baby after my husband's deceased father the day we announced the pregnancy so what did I expect?

I agree there should be someway to vote the in laws off the island or at least make one for themselves.