April 2018 Moms

Questions week of 10/9

pghrenpghren member
edited October 2017 in April 2018 Moms
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Re: Questions week of 10/9

  • Ok I keep seeing carseat covers that seem to entirely cover an infant bucket seat ... what is their purpose? 
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  • @allowachick I *think* they're to keep baby warm while outside in really cold weather (insulating/keeping cold air frI'm direct contact with sensitive skin), but I'm not positive.
    TW
    Me: 33 DH: 32
    Started Dating: 2003 Married: 2013
    Started TTC August 2016
    BFP: 2/1/17 MC: 2/8/17
    BFP: 3/8/17 MMC: 5/1/17
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  • I got confused by the title on this since it says 8/9 instead of 10/9! :-)  It made me rethink what month it is lol.

    I have a non-pregnancy question for everyone.  Have any of you refinanced your home?  We took out an FHA loan and our home value has gone up, so now I am wanting to see about refinancing in order to get rid of the PMI.  But have never refinanced before, so not sure on how it works, how much it typically costs, etc.
  • I got confused by the title on this since it says 8/9 instead of 10/9! :-)  It made me rethink what month it is lol.

    I have a non-pregnancy question for everyone.  Have any of you refinanced your home?  We took out an FHA loan and our home value has gone up, so now I am wanting to see about refinancing in order to get rid of the PMI.  But have never refinanced before, so not sure on how it works, how much it typically costs, etc.
    I've refinanced before and it was pretty smooth.  Usually they come in and appraise it again (I think I paid for usually a few hundred).  In terms of fees, there is a fee to refinance (I think almost in all cases).  I was trying to get my VA loan into a conventional so I could reuse my VA loan again.  Financially at the time I had nothing to give to it and we rolled the fees into the mortgage (not the best option but it worked at the time).  I think it was 5k or less.
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  • I got confused by the title on this since it says 8/9 instead of 10/9! :-)  It made me rethink what month it is lol.

    I have a non-pregnancy question for everyone.  Have any of you refinanced your home?  We took out an FHA loan and our home value has gone up, so now I am wanting to see about refinancing in order to get rid of the PMI.  But have never refinanced before, so not sure on how it works, how much it typically costs, etc.
    You would need to ask your lender about what their terms are.  My lender requires a year of good payment record, 30% equity on your home, and that your market is healthy.  Some lenders require an appraisal to prove the amount of equity, and some require other things.  So you definitely have to chat with them about it.
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  • @sparklingdiamond - I have no advice, but I'm following along because I'm also interested in refinancing.  Not sure if it is something I'm willing to undertake right now though...it sounds like a lot of work!

    I have a slightly baby-related question that I'd love some advice on.  SO and I are eloping in a week and a half!  We are inviting our immediate family out to a fancy restaurant the next night to break the news.  We chose to elope for many reasons:  mostly because it's my second marriage (BTDT with a big wedding) and we wanted to save money.  I'm worried that my parents are going to insist on having some kind of reception with extended family.  

    Here is my question:  is it tacky to have a joint wedding reception/baby shower "celebration"?  I'm considering renting space in a brewery, buying some booze and having a catered, low key open house thing.  We'll only register for baby stuff because we don't really need anything for our home.  My cursory internet search shows that many people do in fact think this is not the proper way to do things so I'm curious about what ya'll think.  Thanks in advance for your two cents!
  • @keeksie84 I wouldn't combine them.  Each event puts an onus on attendees to bring gifts, so everyone who comes will think that is expected of them, and that could get financially overwhelming.  I think you could theoretically spread the word about maybe only wanting on gift (maybe baby only?), but it could get really tacky and presumptuous really quickly to be so dictatorial about what people are to give you.
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  • @ngolimento, thank you.  Just thinking out loud here - what if I included a card with my baby-only registry on it that had a "gifts optional" message on it.  I REALLY don't want to be tacky or presumptuous...I just want to make things easier for everyone by having only one party.  
  • @keeksie84 Your shower plans sound really fun! Is there any reason why you'd want to bill it as a wedding/baby shower? Also, when would you do it? On the surface, it doesn't seem like there should be any problem with it, but I think it could be a little confusing for guests. I'd say if you were doing the event closer to the wedding, I'd call it a wedding shower/party/celebration, but if it was closer to you're due date, I'd call it a baby shower. On the other hand, if a good number of your guests will be traveling a long distance for the event, and they'd want to be at a wedding celebration and a baby shower, this would really simplify things for them. I think if you're clear that you don't want any wedding gifts, just baby stuff, it's not tacky.
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  • @keeksie84 I would still be worried people would think they have to bring two gifts each.

    I would maybe just say it is a wedding reception only, but your registry only has baby items on it?  Still a tad confusing, but less stressful to your guests.
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  • @keeksie84 if a wedding reception is something your parents want i'd say just keep it straight baby shower.  I don't see a reason to combine, if you wanted a reception I'm guessing you'd go the more traditional wedding route to begin with.
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  • Sorry for failing at dates! Changing title now! 
  • I asked this on PGALs checkin but anyone find out they have a SCH later in pregnancy? I’ve had 3 ultrasounds before today and they just found one. Wondering if it’s been there all along or if it’s new? I’ve had one with DS that was much larger and bled that caused me to be on bed rest so I’m little anxious about another. No bleeding thus far this time.
  • keeksie84keeksie84 member
    edited October 2017
    @irenejean thank you.  I'm hoping it could be fun.  I wanted to do a two for one because I don't really like a lot of attention and having two big parties about me in the span of 5 months or so seems like a lot.  It also seems selfish to ask people to come to two parties with two presents.  I'm unsure about the timing...it will be sometime between November and April.

    @ekendall09 thanks for your input.  We'll see what they say.  The goal for me is to keep it as simple for everyone as possible. 

    Edited for spelling.
  • Creeping from May because due date is May 3rd...and maybe you ladies who are further along can help. I'm curious about if any of you ladies used a home Doppler and if so when you found the heartbeat? I'm 10.4 today and would love to use mine but don't want to worry if it's too early!
  • @allowachick the full covers are to keep the baby warm during the cold weather.  Since you don't want to put them in a heavy coat.  You could use blankets but when it's windy ass hell fighting to keep it on is a pain as you are carrying it.  


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  • Creeping from May because due date is May 3rd...and maybe you ladies who are further along can help. I'm curious about if any of you ladies used a home Doppler and if so when you found the heartbeat? I'm 10.4 today and would love to use mine but don't want to worry if it's too early!
    I found his when I was 11w 3 or 4d. Even then it was fairly faint and I could only get a hold of it for a few seconds at a time, but I found it within 30 seconds. 
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  • @keeksie84 we had some friends who invited family and friends to a baby shower, and when guests showed up it was actually (also) a pop up wedding. They had wanted to get married without planning a big thing or spending a ton of money. In your case it won't be the same event, but I personally don't see anything wrong with a dual-purpose celebration. Everyone will be happy to celebrate these big life events with you.
  • Creeping from May because due date is May 3rd...and maybe you ladies who are further along can help. I'm curious about if any of you ladies used a home Doppler and if so when you found the heartbeat? I'm 10.4 today and would love to use mine but don't want to worry if it's too early!
    I found baby's heartbeat for the first time at 9.5, and again today at 11w. I didn't use it in between those dates because I had an ultrasound anyway. Just make sure you keep the Doppler really low on your abdomen (close to your pelvic bone/hairline), and use a lot of the Doppler gel or aloe vera. Also, don't be afraid to look off to the sides- baby may not be exactly in the middle. Every time I have found this baby, he/she is off on my left side a little farther. If you don't find it yet, do your best not to worry! Some doctors won't even use the Doppler until 12 weeks because baby is still pretty small and can hide behind your pubic bone!
    BabyFetus Ticker
    Mama to Rowan Sebastian and baby boy coming in April!

  • Ok I keep seeing carseat covers that seem to entirely cover an infant bucket seat ... what is their purpose? 
    It is to keep the baby protected from the weather elements. I highly recommend getting one. Plus it is advised to not put thick coats on baby so there are really think outer covers that are great in the winter time. There are also lighter weight covers that protect from UV rays in the summer. 
  • Thank you for the tips! I read up online and watched a video and was able to find it just above the pubic bone! So exciting!  :):):):)
    Yay!!! Glad you were able to find it!!!!
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    Mama to Rowan Sebastian and baby boy coming in April!

  • @keeksie84 congratulations! My husband and I also eloped! I say go for the two-in-one party. The fun in eloping is that you get to shirk tradition and do whatever works for you. I like the idea of having one registry with both home and baby items. Im guessing most guests would rather attend only one event—and it’ll be loads easier on you guys. Good luck!
  • kmallskmalls member
    edited October 2017
    @keeksie84 super late to this party, but I agree with @lindsye! I think if you clearly communicate that it's a party with more than one event to celebrate (but with ONE registry), it should be totally fine. Plus I know in my family a few phone calls would be all it takes to clear up any confusion. I say do the combined party and have a great time! 
  • mcb2016mcb2016 member
    edited October 2017
    How far along were you when they started using the Doppler at drs appts?  Of coarse I love hearing the baby. But last pregnancy even at 36 weeks and over 7 pounds the nurse would sometimes have a hard time locating the baby. I have a weird body shape with  flabby skin from losing a lot of weight which I think makes it more tricky. 


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  • @mcb2016 mine uses the doppler at every appointment starting at the 12 week one. I don't know what they do if they have difficulty finding the baby though since that just didn't happen with me the first time
  • ^^ same. They start at 12 weeks but also make a point to say they might not find it and that's not a reason to panic. 
  • @mcb2016 mine starts at 10 weeks
  • @mcb2016 mine started at the first Appt (8w4d) but warned me that it's not unusual to not find it that early so not to freak out. It took a little while but she did find it wayyy down by my pubic bone. My OB does it at every appointment from then on. 
    Me: 31  DH: 32
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  • Thanks guys! I'm trying to prepare myself for what to expect next week at my appt.


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  • My doctor does an ultrasound at every visit so no Doppler.
  • @mountainsmama, @lindsye, @rmmorris, @kmalls thanks so much for your input.  I'm hoping that a combined party will meet everyone's needs/wants without having too many parties.  
  • Oooh that's nice @julzy! I'm a little jealous you get to see baby everytime haha
  • @mcb2016 my doc started it at about 10 weeks, but I got the same warning that she might not be able to find it yet (which is fair since the booger is like 2 inches long at that time).  With my DD1, my doc had a bit of a goose chase.  But with my DD2, every U/S and Doppler check she has cooperated like a dream and has been super quick.
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  • With my history of GD, I had my 1 hour glucose early. Well, I failed. Now I'll be going in for the 3 hour. My last pregnancy I failed the 1 hour so bad they didn't bother with the 3 hour and put straight to a high risk dr. Can anyone give me some insight of what to expect with the 3 hour? How bad is it in comparison to the 1 hour?? 
  • MrsF1017 said:
    With my history of GD, I had my 1 hour glucose early. Well, I failed. Now I'll be going in for the 3 hour. My last pregnancy I failed the 1 hour so bad they didn't bother with the 3 hour and put straight to a high risk dr. Can anyone give me some insight of what to expect with the 3 hour? How bad is it in comparison to the 1 hour?? 
    I think @Dumbgurl04 should have some advice! 
  • Anyone else's toddler afraid of Halloween? The daycare teacher told me DS cries when they read Click Clack Boo. We were watching a Halloween themed Thomas the Train episode the other day and he asked me to turn it off. I don't really like any of the scary parts of Halloween either. The daycare teacher said they are going to keep reading the book occasionally since the other children ask for it. I don't want to be that parent so I didn't say anything, but isn't that a little mean?
  • @MrsF1017 In comparison to the 1 hour the 3 hour just sucks. It's a long wait and you will get blood drawn 4 times and you have to drink more of that awful drink.  With how you will feel it really depends on how bad your one hour numbers where.  I know with mine with this pregnancy the 1 hour numbers were just a little high so only the first hour into the 3 hour was terrible for me. With my last pregnancy the last hour was the worst for me cause I crashed too fast so it really just depends on how your body is reacting this time around.  Also you will get very hungry bring some small snacks so the second you are done you can eat something and don't eat it too fast or you will vomit (learned that the hard way the first time).  

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  • How long did it take for you ladies to receive your NIPT results? I know they told me up to 10 days but I'm wondering if anyone actually had to wait that long? The wait is killing me and I have this irrational fear that the longer it takes the more likely it is bad news. 
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