TTCAL Check-In Week of 10/2 - Page 2 — The Bump
TTC After a Loss

TTCAL Check-In Week of 10/2

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Re: TTCAL Check-In Week of 10/2

  • @msstephanielynn your temp will also stay elevated until right before AF and then it will drop back to pre O temps or if you are pregnant it stays elevated so if you can stand it and not get BSC it can save some money on whether you should actually take HPT or not.  

    @ELeighMay I like FF for adding my temps.  I also use Ovia   I like to put info into both and compare. Crazy I know.  
    ELeighMay
  • @MooFish2364 I’m sorry that you had a crummy day Sunday. Good on you for setting boundaries! The people that support and respect that are invaluable. The people that don’t get it can suck eggs! 

    Me: 34   DH: 36
    Married: 12/2016
    TTC #1: 8/2016
    MC: 11/2016 at 8w
    CP: 7/2017
    BFP: 11/2017
    EDD: 8/5/2018


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  • @MooFish2364 I'm sorry you're having a rough go, but fully support your need to put up boundaries to protect your heart and mental health. People who haven't been through it just don't understand and never will (even the ones who try to be supportive). My sister is still mad at me because I'm essentially ignoring her newborn, and my dad called me on the weekend because he's worried and wants me to use the family as my "support system". Sure, let me rely on a bunch of people who have never suffered through a pregnancy loss, let alone multiple losses and infertility. It is not my job to educate them at the moment - my job is to keep myself healthy and focus on building my family. And I don't need to apologize for that, and neither do you!   
    Me: 35 I DH: 38
    *TW loss and children mentioned*
    DD:2006 | Dx: Unexplained Secondary Infertility | DS: 2011

    TFAS since 2012

    Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C
    Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
    May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
    Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
    Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
    Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
    Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
    Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen  
    Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
    Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201  Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715 U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125!
    EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
    My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019 <3 

    leahcimmichael
  • One more thing to throw on my plate.   I had mammogram a week ago right after I stopped progesterone.  My right side leaked when it was squeezed and she asked me about nursing I said my sons 2 and I stopped at 7 months but have since been pregnant twice and just stopped progesterone.  She said that could be reason for discharge.  But she wrote on my sheet that I have discharge.  I never had any before so now I have to go back for US and they also found micro calcification on my left side so they want to get better images. They had appt today so I'm going.  I just don't need anymore to worry about 
  • tosh24tosh24 member
    edited October 2017
    @Mack2342 I hope it's nothing and it's just a result of toying with your body's hormones for all these months. FWIW, I remember my mom saying that she could squeeze her boobs and get discharge until my youngest sister was like 10 (she BF all of us), and she's never had any breast scares. FX!
    Me: 35 I DH: 38
    *TW loss and children mentioned*
    DD:2006 | Dx: Unexplained Secondary Infertility | DS: 2011

    TFAS since 2012

    Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C
    Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
    May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
    Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
    Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
    Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
    Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
    Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen  
    Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
    Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201  Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715 U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125!
    EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
    My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019 <3 

  • @tosh24 that's good to know.  I can't squeeze and get it.  It was only when machine did the squeezing 
  • temping will confirm O while OPK will indicate LH surge.  I tend to O 2-3 days after OPK surge is detected.  I'm only temping this month until confirmed O then I'm packing it away again.  Something about getting out the BBT really annoyed me that I was doing it again.  I'm starting to feel totally done with all this stuff mentally speaking.  It's kinda starting to get in the way of my clear mind I had going on.
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  • @Mack2342- hope its nothing.  When my mom was going thru the change they put her on hormones and she kept getting cysts from them and kept having to get them drained.  Sorry I know it's a different situation but I do believe messing with hormones can affect your body in different ways.
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  • @40momma you will love it in san francisco! the weather should be still nice when you are here (summer is the coldest season here, and there is a nice indian summer in fall). so many restaurants and parks to go to!!! you guys have to go to dolores park with a picnic during a weekend!

    @MooFish2364 All of it stinks big time! My advice: ignore people who are not supportive, they are simply too egoistic or too stupid to understand your situation. They are not worth your time and your attention. As to the party, I am extremely assertive person so I would just tell them to shut up about ttc, or just make sure to initiate conversations about other topics. Also you can try to be super late to a party, to make sure that you miss any KU announcements and also not hurt your MIL feelings by not showing up at all. Good luck! 

    As to the temping, it was too stressful for me and actually it was also stressful for my DH (he only told me that when i stopped doing it). I understand how it might be very helpful when you have long or irregular cycles, but mine is 28 days with a peak opk at day 15-16, so my OB said to just use OPK and when the time comes (hopefully it won't), we will verify my ovulation with US.
    Also internal body temp (mouth or vagina) should be more consistent and not influenced by external factors (which could easily change the readings for skin temperature).
  • I agree @aga31 -  I think it's a great tool for people with irregular cycles.  The only reason I'm doing it this month is for an accurate prog test.  My cycles are about 30 days with O happening somewhere between days 17-19 and if we BD EOD then I don't see the point of temping.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • Again still trying to catch up !!

    @Mack2342 I have a cyst on one side and calcifications on one side. I go every 6 months for a mammogram and u/s. I hope they find everything to be normal and it’s one less worry for you!! 
  • I'm having a biopsy on Friday.  Doctor said he thought it was benign but couldn't say 100% said he recommended biopsy to make sure.  The discharge turned into a non issue after I told them about pregnancies and progesterone. They still did US which showed nothing. 
  • @Mack2342 I had to have biopsies on both sides. At least they got you in fast!! Get it done and make all of it a non issue. 
  • Mack2342 Wow, that's quick to get you in. Hopefully it'll be a non-issue and you'll have one less thing to worry about.
  • Thanks ladies.  I called RE to see if I should keep IUI for Thursday and they said yes that Friday will not impact anything 
    vlagrl29ELeighMay
  • 1. Introduce Yourself Not new
    2. Status? Waiting to O. Should be any day now. 
    3. R/R I feel like life is racing by and I really want it to slow down! How in the world is it already October?! Fall always seems to go by the quickest. Back to school then Halloween, and then it's Thanksgiving and then Christmas! I guess I'm feeling stressed and maybe I took on to much this season. Or maybe I just need be better organized and grab my planner and write down all my commitments so I don't feel so anxious. And then I start thinking about how we are ttc and adding a baby will just make things more crazy. Deep breathes, haha.
    4. GTKY. If you had a fire in your home and had time to grab 5 things, what would they be? The computer hard drives (photos on there) and the cat. Honestly there isn't much I would be devastated to loose. I already wear my engagement ring and my grandmothers ring everyday. 
    Ivy: July 2010  |  Stella: Dec 2012  |  BFP#3: MMC at 11Wk's, July 2017 | Wyatt: April 2019 | BFP#5: Twin Girls due Sept 2020

  • 1. Introduce Yourself Semi-New. 
    2. Status? Waiting to O.
    3. R/R Got my bill for the d&c. Such bs. I cannot handle the news anymore. It is all just so sad. Every day it's something new. My rave is that AF is gone and I am hopeful for this cycle. I jumped on the temping train and it's already driving me crazy. Fall is here and I'm loving the cooler temps. 
    4. GTKY. If you had a fire in your home and had time to grab 5 things, what would they be? Assuming my family was safe I would grabs my dogs, our old coin collection, my laptop and chargers, clean underwear, and ID's...
  • 1. Intro: newish to the board, but not IF
    2. Status: WTO, first cycle post-loss (ugh)
    3. R/R: Rant - Tom Petty! I've been listening to his music all day in memorial. Rave - my new pumpkin spice candle. Yum!
    4. GTKY: assuming all living creatures are safe, my grandmother's photo albums, grandmother's jewelry, purse, phone and computer.
  • @Mack2342 Fingers crossed for you that this is nothing! Glad IUI will remain on track. 

    @aga31 Definitely something to consider, since I pulled out my OPKs (just trying to understand my cycle at this point since I'm technically benched) and hubs said  ohhhh, the pee stick time again? :|

    @robyn2201 I feel the same way. We're already booked all of October and most of November... although I'm quite happy for it to be November since I will be off the bench!

    @rasco12 *TW* I remember this from my D&C. I can't believe that this is not a covered procedure, since everything in pregnancy seems to be covered. So painful too when I received the bill for an "abortion" - like I chose this, ugh I was livid and completely feel your pain. *End TW*
    And I definitely laughed at clean underwear - good one! 

      




  • @Mack2342 hopefully they don’t find anything! 

    @robyn2201 tell me about it with time going by quickly. I really can’t believe that it’s October already, and the holidays will be here before we know it!

    @Racso12 sorry for your bill. I felt exactly the same after I got the bill for my D&C. It’s like, the pain of losing a baby isn’t bad enough, they have to make you pay an arm and a leg for it on top of that too? Hugs to you and GL this cycle!!
  • The day before my d and c the hospital called to ask how I would be paying! 
  • ugh @sprkls8506 - respond with my fist up your @ss lol  - not sure how I would handle that.

    @Racso12 - I'm pulling out my temp for the final time this month.  My OB agreed with the 7dpo blood draw so I'm going to get an accurate date with the O then put it to bed.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
  • @sprkls8506 mine did that too which I now actually appreciate because there was no follow up bill months later. I paid it on phone day before so it was done 
  • robyn2201robyn2201 member
    edited October 2017
    @cassafrass15 I've been sad about Tom Petty as well! My first concert was his at 17 and someday I wanted to see him play again but that's not going to happen now. :( 
    Ivy: July 2010  |  Stella: Dec 2012  |  BFP#3: MMC at 11Wk's, July 2017 | Wyatt: April 2019 | BFP#5: Twin Girls due Sept 2020

  • Ugh that really sucks that some of you had to pay for dnc, it's an additional punch on top of the horror of loosing a baby. It is unbelievable for me that insurance wouldn't cover it in cases of missed mc, it's not an elective procedure for god's sake! 
    My health insurance is the only amazing thing that keeps me working in academia, because it's not like you get rich from working at university. 
    I am posting here A LOT today, because I am waiting for a biopsy from a patient that was late several hours. Not cool! But I need those samples for my research, so I am just waiting here in a hospital corridor, full of crazy germs!!
    ELeighMay
  • aga31 I end up here during the day too, a lot of what I do is hurry-up and wait unless there's an injury, or training to conduct. Hospital germs, ick. What are you looking for in your biopsy? I think that would be such an interesting profession. 

    I got lucky and what very little medical coverage I have covered my D&C.
  • @aga31 yeah, it’s pretty horrible that many insurances don’t cover it. I have fairly decent insurance coverage, and I still had to pay almost $1000 out of pocket for my D&C.  And ditto the ick to the hospital germs... I work at a hospital and am constantly walking through different areas of the hospital, so I’m always leery of what germs might be around... 
  • @robyn2201 Sadly, I never got to see him in concert. But I wanted to marry him when I was kid because I loved his music so much!
    robyn2201
  • Ya I have sucky insurance, and had to pay $4700 out of pocket once I got all the bills! Insane. Added soooo much stress on top of all my feelings of despair and grief. I'm still super upset about the charges, gets me all riled up.

    1. MC and D&E August 4th

    2. Somewhere in the TWW. We didn't really try much this month, but didn't prevent. But after our memorial service last week I feel more closure and very ready to get pregnant again, so I kind of wish we tried more but oh well. Ready to start next cycle since I'm probably out this month, but will still POAS until my period gets here.

    3. I went out with some friends last night which felt great, except for the conversations about getting/being pregnant :( I was silent during those and felt awkward and sad. OH but I did get an aquarium and some fish so that's some exciting new thing in my life lol.

    4. GTKY.  I'd honestly freak out too much to grab anything other than my family/pets. But, if I was calm and rational, I would like to grab my purse, my wedding ring, my husband's wedding ring (we usually don't wear them and have them at home), my photo albums, and my daughter's favorite stuffie. 




  • Racso12Racso12 member
    edited October 2017
    Ugh!! I can't believe so many of us had to deal with the sh*ttiness of paying for the d&c. I must have crap insurance because it's $5200. It includes the dating ultrasound and the quick office visit after the u/s with my ob to discuss my options. All things that had my pregnancy resulted in a living child would have been included. But I've been told d&cs are classified as abortions. How freakin awful is that?? 

    @fishee333 Those situations are awkward. I'm sorry you had to sit through that especially so recently removed from it happening. No one knows I had a mmc. So I get asked a lot when I'm going to have a baby and that I should start working on it. I know they come from a good place. But it's rude and insensitive. You never know what someone is going through. Heck, maybe it isn't even in someone's life plan to have kids. It's rude to put them in a position to feel like they're doing something wrong by not wanting to have kids. If I were blunt I would fire back. But I just smile and giggle along with them. 

    @vlagrl29 Does that mean you're getting a blood draw to find out when you actually O? I'm sorry I'm not familiar. 
  • I'm blown away that you have to pay for the D&C. It makes me so mad and yet feel incredibly fortunate that I live in Canada. Just went to the obgyn and he ordered blood tests and a hysteroscopy and I have to admit, the cost of it never crossed my mind as it's covered here. That being said, he did mention the idea of possibly IVF in the future (oop) and the cost made me gag. My heart goes out to all of you ladies in the US that get kicked from the healthcare system when you're already down. 
  • vlagrl29vlagrl29 member
    edited October 2017
    @Racso12- it's the 7dpo prog test check to make sure it's still in a good level.  I'm going to temp and OPK to make sure I get a really good accurate number.  Temping is really the only way I will know the exact date you O.
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    Racso12
  • @fishee333 Ugh, those conversations are so hard. I feel you. ***TW I'm really open about my struggle to get pregnant and about my losses. Even so, today a co-worker announced his wife is pregnant with their 5th child and, afterward, felt the need to comment to me that he was sorry for my recent loss (9/17) and that it's "funny" how hard it is for some people when he and his wife "hardly have to try." I mean I'm not about to get fired by physically assaulting lunatics at work, but I definitely punched him in the throat with my mind.
    ELeighMayvlagrl29tosh24
  • @cassafrass15 wow. That is such a terrible thing for a co-worker to say!! Well for anyone to say!! So insensitive.
  • @cassafrass15 No. No. No. What is wrong with this guy? In what world is this being sorry? I'm sorry - it would have been better for him to not say anything! 
  • Had a rough go in the last 24hrs. I'm going to *TW* this whole messy post. 

    *TW- child/birth/loss/pregnancy*


     
    Yesterday afternoon, on my way home from the train, I drove by the hospital where I delivered my son (it's in my town and on the way) and looked up and saw the room that I gave birth in. The memories just flooded back to me, on how happy it was to be locked up in that room with a newborn, and how naive I was in that time, how easy it was for me to get pregnant on the first try and have a healthy baby. I'm scared for myself because the 3 following miscarriages have changed me. I'm worried that I'll never be able to enjoy that again - either being in the delivery room at all or being there, but just being so damn thankful and relieved that nothing bad happened again after years of worry. 

    I'll just never be the same again. I cried most of last night and while talking about it to my Hubs he asked when we would be done trying because it's coming up on a year since we started TTC. I said I wasn't sure that there was a time, but more rather when/ how many miscarriages we go on to have. I'm just not sure how many times I can continue to put myself through this emotionally. And he said that he's not sure how long either because I've changed and he hates to see me go through all of this. So while I am so excited to get off the bench, it's this looming fear coming over me of what if this surgery didn't fix it, what if that wasn't the issue and I'm going to go through this again. Nothing seems easy from this point forward even if I do get that BFP. I just feel broken and of course none other than a beautiful 9 month pregnant chooses my row for the hour train ride into the city this morning. My seat was already ticketed so I was stuck just adding insult to injury.
  • @msstephanielynn I'm sorry for the bad day. I have similar feelings.  I have a healthy son and it was so easy the first time.  Two losses since and I worry if it happens and if it does will it stick but yet I'm not ready to throw in the towel.  DH has these same thoughts and worries that the next one might break me.  I assured him it wouldn't but that I might still be a mess for a bit. 


    @cassafrass15 that's horrible and rude.  a girl I work with said something insensitive too. She just had twins after telling me she just wanted to be a good mom to her son which I took that to mean I wasn't a good mom because I wanted to hurry and have another one mainly because I'm over 40.  Anyway the other day (which she knows about losses) she asked how things were going with fertility which I hated that she asked as it's not her business and I just said we keep going and she replied I guess we are just so lucky that we are so compatible as if my DH and I aren't.  I said well it has more to do with my age than anything else and walked out the door. Pissed me off.  Made me not like her even more! 
  • @msstephanielynn I’m sorry for the rough day. I agree-things will never be the same after a loss. Sending hugs ur way for a better day today. 

    @Mack2342 I don’t know why people have to be so rude. I’m sorry you have to work with someone like that. 
  • @msstephanielynn The universe is just so cruel sometimes. *TW* We have a DS and I look at him and wonder how we got so lucky to have him. It was so easy with him from beginning to end and everything went just as the majority of PG's do. I have his newborn pics pop up in my FB 'On This Day' thing and as much as it makes me heart explode with love for him it makes me sick to know that he should have a little sister coming, and she's not. I completely understand about the hospital. It's all so bittersweet.

    cassafrass15 Throat-punching is my thing too. :wink: I'm so sorry your rude co-worker would feel it was ok to make any comment even closely related to what he said. I swear people don't think before the word vomit begins.
  • I'm sorry for all of that @msstephanielynn - what kind of surgery did you have and what is is supposed to fix?
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