TTC After a Loss

October TWW

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Re: October TWW

  • I guess this is the appropriate thread to say hi in, since I’m 6 DPO. In May 2016, I miscarried at 13 weeks and needed a D&E. After letting my body recover, we’ve been trying since, except for a couple months after I started a new job. 

    Now I’m finally scheduled for my Day 3/infertility  bloodwork to see if there’s been a problem, and it’s been a rough wait. It would be nice if I get a positive this month, but I’m not especially hopeful. 
  • @lin0442 Welcome and I'm so sorry for your loss. Good luck with doctor appointment and testing. The IF road can be overwhelming at times. I hope you are able to find some answers and move forward with hope for welcoming your rainbow baby. 
    Me: 35 I DH: 38
    *TW loss and children mentioned*
    DD:2006 | Dx: Unexplained Secondary Infertility | DS: 2011

    TFAS since 2012

    Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C
    Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
    May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
    Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
    Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
    Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
    Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
    Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen  
    Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
    Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201  Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715 U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125!
    EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
    My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019 <3 

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  • tosh24 I am have everything crossed for you that you get a spot in the event you don't get KU by then. That's great news!

    @vlagrl29 Good luck at your appointment, I hope it goes well.

    fishee333 ME TOO! I'm going on two years of this, and I can't believe Google doesn't block me from looking that stuff up by now. The info isn't going to change,  but I do it every cycle like I've forgotten. Good luck, I hope this is your month!

    I'm 10dpo and BFN this morning. I convince myself I'm out and just as soon as I do I develop a new symptom that sucks my brain back in the game. I'm not due for AF until next Monday or so, so I still have time and am hoping that my BFN is too early, but in all honesty this isn't likely my cycle. I don't know why I can have a completely rational thought on the topic and still be BSC with hope at the same time. It's bizzare.


  • @lin0442 welcome and so sorry for your loss. 

    @tosh24 hope you get a spot quickly!!!
  • @tosh24 - I'm sure your DH was just having a small moment of panic. I  think I would as well.  I hope all goes well with that and you're able to get that testing you want from  your RE.

    Sorry for all the BFNs.  I think ya'll test way too early :)
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  • @sprkls8506 @tosh24 Thank you. I was active on the board months ago and it’s really a wonderful group of women here, but I had to step away from it for a while.

    It’s scary- I got pregnant so easily the first time, I’m worried my surgery messed something up. Better to know than not, though. 

    Fingers crossed for all of you.
  • @tosh24 Thank you. I am feeling human today. No fever, no vomiting. Still can't eat but I'll totally take that over what I've been dealing with this week! I hope you're feeling better too! I'm sooo rooting for you to get one of those spots! But hopefully you don't even need it! Hopefully your DH's cold feet warm up real quick!

    @lin0442 Welcome and I'm so sorry for your loss. Hopefully you find some answers soon. I hope your stay here is short and you can move to a BMB!

    @ELeighMay I test way early too (I once tested at 6 DPO whhhhat?) and always convince myself I'm not KU'd. I think I do it so I don't get my hopes up (or at least that's what DH tells me ha). Hopefully you're staring at a BFP in a couple days!
  • lin0442 Welcome, and I'm sorry for your loss. 

    Kath525 With my MMC I tested two days after AF was due and still had a super faint line, so I'm not sure why I think I have to have a glaring BFP at 10dpo or I'm out. I don't think that I'm trying not to get my hopes up, I think that I legitimately KNOW that I'm likely not KU, but there's that little twinge in the back of my mind that says "not everyone has symptoms before their BFP, THAT COULD BE YOU! TEST! TEST! TEST!". I'm seriously POAS and at that same moment telling myself how dumb it is that I'm wasting a test. I swear, I'm schizophrenic at that moment. I'm also in a serious panic with our stop TTC date being in December. That's our last month so I'm freaking out a bit on that front. I don't want a BFN to be how this story ends, but it's entirely possible and frankly quite likely. I really hope some ladies get some BFP's this cycle. That glimmer of hope is so amazing. 
  • @ELeighMay Every woman here deserves a BFP but extra hoping for you with that deadline coming up for you. I'm sure that creates so much anxiety. I'd be a wreck. We definitely need some more BFP's this cycle. Feels like it's been a while. So we're due for a few!
  • Guys my new doc said to come on in today. She has plenty to discuss even though not all my labs are back .....
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  • Last month for ttc @ELeighMay don't let that stress you it could make it worse. I just realized last week I still need to keep my path even if we see RE next year. 
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  • vlagrl29 Hopefully you get some good news at your appointment! My last month TTC is actually December, but I'm trying so hard to keep the stress level down. That's a hard thing to do.
  • jchpgjchpg member
    edited October 2017
    @lin0442 I’m sorry for your loss- welcome.

    I was hoping for some good news ladies with the little explosion of new massages on here!

    I'm still TWW- I guess I Od late this month and I’m predicted to have AF Saturday after a 32 day cycle... I’m obsessively peeing on sticks morning and night ... all negative so far. I only had one positive with my loss and it was after AF was four days late so I have no idea if I can even turn a test early- I’m really hoping I have a chance still. My temps staying up.... no matter what happens next Tuesday- the 31st is ganna be tough- it’s the EDD of my loss. I’m hoping to hold it together. 


    edited because my finger slipped and posted too early!! 

  • will you see a specialist then @ELeighMay ?  I tell you I was pulling out all my tricks starting in sept and just last week I realized it's making me miserable.  I've been feeling so much better again like a weight has been lifted.
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  • @vlagrl29 Good luck today!

    @jchpg I thought the same thing when I saw all the new messages. I was like "YES"!!! We need some BFPs up in here. 

    Me: 35 I DH: 38
    *TW loss and children mentioned*
    DD:2006 | Dx: Unexplained Secondary Infertility | DS: 2011

    TFAS since 2012

    Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C
    Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
    May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
    Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
    Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
    Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
    Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
    Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen  
    Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
    Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201  Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715 U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125!
    EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
    My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019 <3 

  • vlagrl29 Nope, no specialists. We have no insurance that covers any IF treatments of any kind., so we're just done after that. :( DH is adamant about ending our journey at the two year mark.
  • I understand @ELeighMay just don't feel you have to be stressed to get it done in 2 months.  We don't have coverage with but I'm willing to pay oop for a few clomid cycles. But I want an end too soon. 
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  • @jchpg I hope you are able to distract yourself on the 31st. I found out on Nov 1st last year that I would miscarry. I plan on keeping myself busy. 

    @ELeighMay I hope you get your BFP! 
  • sprkls8506 Thanks, I do too. In the meantime you'll find me wandering Wal-Mart with a cart full of HPT's I fully intend to pee on over the course of the next couple months if nothing else. Those milestone dates are a hard thing. I'm not looking forward to my birthday next year, that's when I found out I miscarried. Hopefully landing on a weekday will make the day go faster for you. *hugs*
  • @ELeighMay I didn’t even buy any cheapies this month. I should have. Will have to buy real ones to test Tues. Milestones are so hard. I feel like I’ve been a grouch all month because I found out last yr in Oct that I was pregnant. And I’m still not pregnant! Yes 
  • Understand the milestones... was losing my crap earlier this month with the late AF, stupid job, and realization that a few days ago was the 2 year anniversary of my first MC (D&E). Super depressing realizing I've been at this for over 2 years with nothing but 4 MCs and serious mental issues to show for it.

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.

    FET #1: June 3, 2024 (failed)

    Lupron Depo June 2024. Benched 3 months again before next FET.

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • tosh24tosh24 member
    edited October 2017
    I'm sorry @dpjennifer. Milestones are tough. The one year anniversary of my baby's death date is coming up in November and I know I'm going to be a complete wreck that day. Especially since I don't have a rainbow baby or one on the way. I'm taking a compassion day at work and staying home that day. I know I will not be able to function in any capacity.

    Another stark white BFN today at 12 DPO (could be 11 DPO). And now I've started cramping on and off. AF is due either today or tomorrow. When she gets here (CD 1) I have to call to book my hysteroscope for sometime between CD 5-CD12 since I asked my new RE to look in my ute and make sure everything is OK. She's also going to take a biopsy to make sure there's no infection from everything that's happened in the last year (D&C, IUIs) or remnant fetal tissue. And then, hopefully an IVF cycle. FX. 

    ETA: I must have called her out with my post. AF is here so I guess I'll be making plans for my next cycle. 
    Me: 35 I DH: 38
    *TW loss and children mentioned*
    DD:2006 | Dx: Unexplained Secondary Infertility | DS: 2011

    TFAS since 2012

    Oct 16: Spontaneous BFP | m/c @ 9w1d (massive SCH) | D&C
    Apr 17: IUI #1 = BFN
    May 17: IUI #2 = BFN
    Jun 17: IUI #3 = Late BFP (18 DPO) | NMC 17Jul17 @ ~6w
    Aug 17: IUI #4 = Cancelled due to premature ovulation | TI = BFN
    Sep 17: IUI #5 = Cancelled due to overstimulation (10+ follies)
    Nov 17: IVF #1 = Cancelled due to non-IF related health issue | TI = BFN
    Dec 17: IVF #1 = Puregon 200, Menopur 75, Orgalutran, Suprefact trigger due to OHSS risk | 22R, 18M, 16F, 10B frozen  
    Feb 18: FET #1 (medicated) = BFN
    Mar 18: FET #2 (natural cycle) = CP (beta 1: 54; beta 2: 0)
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = cancelled due to missed ovulation
    Apr 18: FET #3 (natural cycle) = BFP! Beta 1: 201  Beta 2: 585 Beta 3: 3254 Beta 4: 9715 U/S 19May - one bean measuring on track with a HB of 125!
    EDD: 07Jan2019 Team Green
    My Rainbow Baby Boy born 03Jan2019 <3 

  • @tosh24 Hugs! It's always a mess to cross milestones. Actually, I find that I usually freak out coming up to them, but am not too bad the day of. This whole thing just sucks!

    MC #1: D&C Oct 23, 2015 (7.5 weeks)
    MC #2: July 1, 2016 (5.5 weeks)
    MC #3: October 17, 2016 (CP)
    RE #1: RPL testing November 2016-January 2017
    MC #4: Feb. 28, 2017 (CP)
    RE #2: Additional RPL testing March-November 2017
    MC #5: January 2019 (6.5 weeks)

    RE #3: More testing 2023. 
    Egg Retrieval Sept/Oct 2023, 2 good embryos after PGT-A testing.
    Surgery for endometriosis January 2024
    Lupron Depo March 2024.  Benched 3 months.

    FET #1: June 3, 2024 (failed)

    Lupron Depo June 2024. Benched 3 months again before next FET.

    #BitterHagPartyOf1

  • My 1 year of loss will be the last week of December.  It's been very important for me this year to really enjoy the holidays w/o stress and worry.  So far so good.  I just really want some happy memories this christmas and new years.
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  • @dpjennifer sending hugs your way. Milestones are rough, so take the time you need to try to feel ok. 
  •  @tosh24 @dpjennifer @sprkls8506 sorry that those milestones are here for you. My first loss EDD is next week as well. Seems like there's a bunch of us hitting some rough dates. Hoping we all find some peace these next couple of weeks.
    @vlagrl29 i love your attitude on this ❤
  • Milestones are hard.  I’m right with you all...my 2nd loss EDD is 11/12 so it will be here before we know it.  I too found I stressed way more about it leading up to that day.  I planned for a lot of activity that day so I didn’t really think about until I laid down for bed and then of course sobbed.  I guess I subconsciously planned for this one too as my mom and sister are coming into town that wkd to do some Christmas shopping.  Hoping that helps again.  Hugs to you all
  • I’m so sorry so may of us have though milestones coming up. My EDD Tuesday is going to be extra hard now that AF arrived  :'(

    Good luck to you ladies still in TWW.
  • @jchpg Sorry about AF.

    And sorry all you ladies with milestones coming up, I  dreading mine as well. My first milestone is in January (my EDD) and I have several friends with babies due then as well. Whether I'm pregnant by then or not, it's going to be hard. 

    Sorry I don't have time to respond to everyone, I'm working all weekend which will help distracted from my own TWW, but I will check in when I can!
  • I'm sorry and big hugs to all with milestones...it truly, truly sucks. 

    @vlagrl29 how did the appointment go?
    Me: 39 DH: 39
    CP 1/25/16 4.5 weeks, developed Graves' disease
  • It went awesome @amberruka I wrote about it on the weekly check in. My blood sugars are low I have hypoglycemia which I figured and my t3 and t4 are low. So I'm on a crap ton of supplements now.
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  • @vlagrl29 sorry I missed that...great news! :-)
    Me: 39 DH: 39
    CP 1/25/16 4.5 weeks, developed Graves' disease
  • I think that I am 3 Dpo. I started using FF and temping at the start of this cycle.
    Me: 38, DH: 37
    Married: 8/10/13
    BFP- 12/18/15, D&E- 4/8/16 @ 21w5d- confirmed Thanatophoric Dysplasia
    BFP- 11/7/17, M/C- 11/18/17 @ 4w6d
    BFP- 8/25/18 ~ EDD- 5/9/19 ~ DD born 5/2/20 *Lillian Hazel*
    BFP- 10/9/20 ~ EDD- 6/21/21

  • @amberruka it can't hurt right. Have no idea if this will help but if nothing else I'm becoming more healthier lol.
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  • Light spotting started today so AF shall be here in a day or two
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  • 10 DPO. Annnnd the BSC SS begins.....
  • I think I'm here for about another day. I haven't POAS since Friday, which was BFN of course so I'm just waiting for AF to arrive so I can start all over again. 
  • 8 DPO and I POAS with a BFN result of course. It's DH's bday so I thought a BFP would be a nice bday gift. Oh well. I'll try and hold off 2 more days before I test again. 
  • 11 DPO. BFN. Feeling frustrated that I'm still squinting at sticks, trying to desperately see lines that just don't exist. Sucks.
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