April 2018 Moms

STM+: Let's talk about judging other parents...

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Re: STM+: Let's talk about judging other parents...

  • @ngolimento I certainly don't mean you are the most likely person in the room to do it. You are contemplating it and thinking about it which is a lot more than a lot of people do. I think a good portion of people hear about it and, are immediately disgusted and dismiss it as something they would never do. That is what scares me.

    When I say if could happen to anyone but you have to stay on guard and alert I mean be aware and take measures to prevent accidents from happening. The article has a good point for example about teaching older kids to honk horns and such and making sure they can get out of their seat belts to do so. My 4 year old can get her chest clip undone but is not strong enough to undo the lap belt. If she were to get trapped I know she would just panic. My car has child locks on the back doors so I've had to tell her to try the front doors. I've had to teach her how to pull her arms out after undoing the chest clip to give enough slack to be able to wiggle out and get to the horn. With my husband because I am aware something could happen if routines are off I try to make sure to call him or have him call me when there is a weird drop off scenario. I always check the backseat of my car even if I know I am alone just in case, etc... I know a lot of people that put their purse in the backseat as a reminder. I had a friend who puts one shoe in the backseat. Its not easy to leave your car without your shoe.

    Again, I certainly don't mean to insult you or say you're the most likely one to leave your kid, but I do think that some people believing they could never do it makes it less likely they will take active precautions against it happening which could make it more likely. Like I said, I know someone personally who did do it. She never thought it would happen to her either.
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  • @Lalala2326. Ok that makes more sense to me.  I see what you are saying.  I like your ideas in teaching your kids about how to get out of the car.
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  • I would judge mothers at stores when their kids would throw tantrums.. Now my almost 2 year old almost always throws a tantrum in public. Its embarrassing.. And I'm the one probably being judged. Lol. 
  • @Lalala2326  I see what you're saying, but still feel there's a difference and am not going to get past it.  I KNOW that I will never do this.  It's just impossible for me.  I am almost never alone and always have my son with me.  When I have 2, I'm not going to forget I have 2 kids. I was also never really sleep deprived or have hormone issues.  In your friend's case, it clicked very soon after, just as my example with having turned the wrong way and realizing it right away.  For someone to forget them long enough to die...just, no.  And in the article, I didn't see that as the mom forgetting him in the car.  She knew what was going on and what he was going to do, but what happened was really an accident.  She didn't just leave the car and forget him in it. 

    All that said, the idea of teaching them how to get out of the car is awesome and something I haven't thought of in case of some kind of accident.  I will have to do this.  I'm just afraid that when he's taught, he will try to use the "being able to get out of his seat" while I'm driving if he wants something.
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  • hlynn5 said:no 89mm
    I used to humorously judge my brother and his wife for lying to their kids about what they were eating, just to get them to eat.  For example, they said peas were green corn.  And when the kids would only drink chocolate milk, they started giving them "white chocolate milk" (which was just regular milk).  Who knew a few short years later I would be serving my son mashed potatoes telling him to eat his "warm ice cream."
    That made my day
  • maureenmcemaureenmce member
    edited August 2017
    Oh that is a good one @tgortney !  I judged that too and now I pretty much only use months and not years.
  • @hlynn5 lmao @ warmed ice cream!


    DS: EDD, December 19th, 2014. Born, December 19th, 2014!
    DD: EDD, July 18th, 2016. Born, July 19th, 2016!
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  • I also used to judge moms that made separate meals for their kids. But, as revenge, I have a toddler that refuses anything that's not mac'n'cheese, scrambled eggs or yogurt. Occasionally grapes. 

    Me: 35, Hubbie: 33
    Married DH: 2013
    DD: Dec 2015
    BFP 8/14/17 --> Due 4/27/2018

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  • I have to admit I'm guilty of the character clothing. What changed my mind was an article written by a teacher talking about the pride the kids get from showing things that are important to them on their clothing. My dd has tons of cute clothes and very little character clothing but I try not to let it bother me as much. It's her way of showing her interests. (That girl can rock a tutu and tennis shoes like nobody's business, too!)
  • @riversdoctor Now that DS is in kinder I see him and the other boys comparing tee shirts at drop-off and talking about which characters they have. It totally is a pride thing and now a bonding thing too. Makes it hard for me to keep hating it.
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  • we didn't buy anything that said princess on it for DD @ngolimento.  I'm still haven't bought any tutus or dresses for DD but that's because she hasn't said she wants any of that.  But if she ever does I will but so far she seems pretty happy with just shirts and pants

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  • I did too @ngolimento, then my SON decided he loved all things pink and frilly... so now our house is covered, mostly at his request lolololol

    DS: EDD, December 19th, 2014. Born, December 19th, 2014!
    DD: EDD, July 18th, 2016. Born, July 19th, 2016!
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    Baby #3: EDD, April 16th, 2016
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  • @tgortney  Yessss. Now I say "almost 2" but that's because 21 months sounds kinda funny.

    @fishsticks-n-custard Those are all LOs favorite foods! ;)
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