Weekday Randoms! 6/26-30 - Page 4 — The Bump
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Weekday Randoms! 6/26-30

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Re: Weekday Randoms! 6/26-30

  • wait, also, @LoveInDC made March's pinned threads (which have been pinned), but it's been less than 24 hours, so now they can't edit or fill anything in or change anything? wtf? TB gods are sort of screwing March, no? 
    Me: 30 // DH: 30
    TTC #1: July 2016
    BFP - Sept 2016 // MC - Sept 2016
    TTC #1 (version 2.0): May 2017
    BFP - Sept 2017 // EDD - June 2, 2018 // DD born June 6, 2018
    lurvleybunchococonutskiki75vflux33bethennyfrankel
  • @doxiemoxie212 Yup... March is definitely off to a rough start
    Me: 33 DH: 33
    Married: June 2016
    TTC: Oct 2016
    Dx: PCOS
    Nov. 2017: 2.5 mg Letrozole + TI = BFN
    Dec. 2017: 2.5 mg Letrozole + TI = BFP Jan.25, EDD Oct. 10


    vflux33bethennyfrankel
  • Loading the player...
  • @beanship I was scrolling thru your GIFs and literally snorted out loud on the last one 
    purplepelicanvflux33bethennyfrankelleekat14
  • Message to BumpAdmin sent. I think @doxiemoxie212 is right about not feeding the trolls. Report it and move on.
    Me: 29 | DH: 29
    Married 12/2016
    DSS born 01/2016
    TTC since 01/2017
    Letrozole + TI = BFP 01/30/2018 | EDD 10/11/2018
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
    lurvleybunchococonutsbethennyfrankelhedgepig
  • Holy crap. I'm away for a few days and we have an awesome grad announcement and that same member gets banned. WTAF?  @LoveInDC was nothing but supportive and dedicated to TB and the ladies here on TTGP. I didn't see the full post after stuff was removed, but seriously @BumpAdmin? Not cool. Not okay. I'm sad. 

    On another note I agree with @doxiemoxie212 & @pebbledam a little direction gentle flaming, but if we give the AW posts all the attention they'll just keep doing it. 
    Me: mid 30s DH: early 30s
    TTC 10/2016

    "Some days are diamonds, some days are rocks,
    some doors are open, some roads are blocked" 
    pebbledambethennyfrankel
  • @avrilmai The "rule follower" in me is going crazy with all of these one-off posts. I want to be nice to the ones who recently had a loss because I get what they're going through and it's horrible. At the same time though I want to make sure that they know that one off posts are generally frowned upon. I'd hate for them to do another one-off post, get flamed for it, and then be upset because they had done one before with no problems. I feel like if I say anything though I sound like an inconsiderate B.
    Me: 30   DH:32
    Dating: 2/2007   Married: 4/2011  
    TTC #1: 9/2016
    *TW*

    BFP #1: 11/26/2016 - MC: 12/6/2016
    BFP #2: 3/9/2017 - CP: 3/10/2017
    08/2017: DH's SA = normal
    08/2017: Low progesterone (4.6) all other BW normal
    11/2017: HSG Clear; Pelvic Ultrasound Normal; and AMH, FSH, and Estradiol normal
    12/2017: 1,000mg Metformin
    12/2017: 50mg Clomid + TI = BFN
    01/2018: 100mg Clomid + TI = BFN
    01/2018: RE Consult
    03/2018: 5mg Letrozole + 50 units Gonal-F + 500 μg Ovidrel + IUI = BFP #3: 4/1/2018 - CP: 4/4/2018
    04/2018: 5mg Letrozole + Gonal-F + Ovidrel + IUI = BFP #4: 5/2/18
    Pregnancy Ticker
    pebbledamvflux33Sailing_Mama
  • I'm not going to say anything because I'm on double secret probation, but I think the best course of action is to let them know that we feel for them and want them to join in, and the best way to do that is by joining the dailies/weeklies so we can get to know them. 
    Me: 28 DH: 29
    Married: 6/2016
    TTC #1: 12/2016
    Benched due to deployment- Off the bench 8/8/17!


    KariAnn323Sailing_Mama
  • I don't think that not flaming will change their actions but I think it will prevent more of us from being banned. 
    Me: 30 // DH: 30
    TTC #1: July 2016
    BFP - Sept 2016 // MC - Sept 2016
    TTC #1 (version 2.0): May 2017
    BFP - Sept 2017 // EDD - June 2, 2018 // DD born June 6, 2018
    Augusta108vflux33Sailing_Mama
  • @zwink1 I mean sure, we can complain about how TB is run from an admin perspective, but 1) then we should really set our sights even higher because a lot of this stems from UX issues on this site (the sticky posts don't stand out if you're new to forums, the language at the top doesn't stand out and isn't even present on mobile, the mobile app site seems like it might just be a weird Q&A site if you're new, etc), 2) we can't control the actions of others but we can control our own, 3) i agree @LoveInDC banning was unwarranted, but I would still guess that if we stopped flaming drive bys it wouldn't have happened. 
    Me: 30 // DH: 30
    TTC #1: July 2016
    BFP - Sept 2016 // MC - Sept 2016
    TTC #1 (version 2.0): May 2017
    BFP - Sept 2017 // EDD - June 2, 2018 // DD born June 6, 2018
    bethennyfrankelpetethecatSailing_Mamafishsticks-n-custard
  • snip
    antoto said:
    Also, I exchanged a few PMs with kierstenvictoria and she definitely wasn't trolling because of how we reacted - she was just too self absorbed to realize she was doing anything wrong.  And that's what it is most of the time.  They do stupid things because the just burst in and don't bother looking around before posting.  There is absolutely nothing we could have done differently that would have changed her actions. 
    I had a feeling that might be the case after I read some of her stuff. Hopefully she'll tread more carefully and try to be a little less obtuse in the future. Cause wow, that is like reality TV levels of self-absorption. @LoveInDC was so diplomatic in how she handled March18. I read through the TOU and couldn't understand her ban at all :( 
    pebbledambethennyfrankelpetethecatSailing_Mama
  • zwink1zwink1 member
    500 Love Its 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary Name Dropper
    @doxiemoxie212, I guess that is where I disagree with you. I don't think it's worthwhile to complain about the overall admin or site issues, and I also don't think it's worthwhile to change our behavior.

    At the end of the day, I don't think that we truly flame that many people. Most of the people who just don't read the rules (for whatever reason - site issues or otherwise) are redirected and encouraged to stay. There's value in redirecting people and there's value in calling people out on shitty behavior.

    My point up above was more that TB has clearly laid out user rules, including what content in posts will get them removed for a TOU voilation and will result in a warning. We can't control how other people react, so even if we respond in a polite manner, there is still the possibility that they report (as happened here) and it's on the admins to stick to their own written rules and fairly assess the situation. That is literally their job, and it is worthwhile to call them out on it when it's not done correctly.
    Me: 30 H: 34
    NTNP: 03/2015-05/2015
    TTC #1: 06/2015...
    Dx: MFI, ovulatory dysfunction
    IVF ER: 11/2017 - 6 on ice
    FET: 01/2018 = BFP - EDD 10/5









    vflux33bethennyfrankelpebbledamkmalls
  • I just don't understand why reporting people who are in violation of TOU and then writing one word (if you must comment), "reported," is not a better way to handle MUD posts, pee stick posts, etc. I agree that clueless people should be politely redirected. I also think it's pretty easy to tell the difference. I think making a huuuuge deal about posts that are clearly nonsense or have already been addressed by like 20 people is clearly not worth it. 

    And my point wasn't that we should complain about the UX, it was that it is dumb to complain about how admins deal with bannings. At the end of the day this is a forum site, and the admins are likely some 22-year-old random fool with 500 other job responsibilities. 

    Obv everyone can make their own decisions, but we talk a lot about treating this board like friendships and conversations in real life, and if some crazy person came up to you and 50 of your friends with a weird question IRL, maybe 5 people would respond, max. It would never be a tidal wave of, "me too, me too, I'd like to ALSO explain how you've wronged me." 

    I get that kiersten whatever might have been clueless, but there have been so many in the past few days that are cllleeaaarrrllllyyy MUD. The more people comment, the more the thread stays alive. Report. Comment on something else and push it off page 1. 
    Me: 30 // DH: 30
    TTC #1: July 2016
    BFP - Sept 2016 // MC - Sept 2016
    TTC #1 (version 2.0): May 2017
    BFP - Sept 2017 // EDD - June 2, 2018 // DD born June 6, 2018
    petethecatizza2
  • @doxiemoxie212 - While I agree that we may be fanning the flames too much sometimes, I completely disagree that it's dumb to complain about how the admins apply the TOU. Why even have a TOU if they aren't going to apply it fairly?
    Me: 29 | DH: 29
    Married 12/2016
    DSS born 01/2016
    TTC since 01/2017
    Letrozole + TI = BFP 01/30/2018 | EDD 10/11/2018
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
    vflux33bethennyfrankelizza2zwink1
  • @pebbledam yeah, TOU are like dress codes for country clubs; they're much less likely to be a means of decorum maintenance and much more likely to be a means of discrimination. But what exactly are they discriminating against? Established members vs newbs? TTGP grads? @loveindc specifically? 
    Me: 30 // DH: 30
    TTC #1: July 2016
    BFP - Sept 2016 // MC - Sept 2016
    TTC #1 (version 2.0): May 2017
    BFP - Sept 2017 // EDD - June 2, 2018 // DD born June 6, 2018
  • vflux33vflux33 member
    2500 Comments 500 Love Its Second Anniversary Name Dropper
    edited June 2017
    @doxiemoxie212 Yes I believe the favoritism is for newbs as opposed to established members. They know we are already going to stick around here giving their ads clicks and they want more people to use the site everyday and give their ads clicks. It's just like any other site. 

    ETA I don't personally click on the ads and I'm sure many of you don't either, but you know what I mean--they get more money from advertisers when their # of daily users increases. 
    Me: 34 H: 37
    Dating: 2003 Married: 2010
    TTC #1: Started April 2016
    Dx: Unexplained Infertility  Dx: NIR PCOS
    Twin boys born by unplanned c section 2/22/18


    purplepelicanpebbledamizza2kiki75
  • @vflux33 Holy crap, that's an excellent point about the ad clicks. I never thought of that. Makes total sense. 

    Me: 35, Hubbie: 33
    Married DH: 2013
    DD: Dec 2015
    BFP 8/14/17 --> Due 4/27/2018

    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker

    vflux33purplepelicanpebbledamizza2
  • One thing is for certain, @doxiemoxie212 and I come from very different socioeconomic backgrounds. You really couldn't have picked a worse metaphor for me, but I kinda get what you are saying.

    Ultimately, if I think someone is getting unfairly banned, I'm going to say something because that's my perogative. I also plan on officially reporting more violations of TOU. 
    Me: 29 | DH: 29
    Married 12/2016
    DSS born 01/2016
    TTC since 01/2017
    Letrozole + TI = BFP 01/30/2018 | EDD 10/11/2018
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
    vflux33bethennyfrankelizza2KariAnn323
  • @pebbledam haha to be clear I've never been a member of a country club, or ever been in the position to be. It's just a talking point for a lot of racial discrimination so it's memorable for me. And DH gets super mad about the partners in his law firm who are members of private clubs in NYC who require jackets or say no jeans (but essentially let white guys get away with it but not minorities, etc). 
    Me: 30 // DH: 30
    TTC #1: July 2016
    BFP - Sept 2016 // MC - Sept 2016
    TTC #1 (version 2.0): May 2017
    BFP - Sept 2017 // EDD - June 2, 2018 // DD born June 6, 2018
    vflux33izza2KariAnn323
  • @doxiemoxie212 - Yeah, I don't even know anyone that is a member of a country or private club. That is how far removed I am from your metaphor. The closest I've come to a country club is watching Gilmore Girls. 
    Me: 29 | DH: 29
    Married 12/2016
    DSS born 01/2016
    TTC since 01/2017
    Letrozole + TI = BFP 01/30/2018 | EDD 10/11/2018
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
    nitnat007izza2AvrilmaiKariAnn323
  • Also, again, if you're going to complain about someone getting banned maybe consider the systemic issue which is that this site is not built well from a UX perspective. We'd have fewer clueless drive bys if it were built better. And thus less to complain about. And thus nothing to get banned over. That's all I'm saying. I think it's pointless to complain bc they obv DGAF, but I think it's nice everyone is rallying for @loveindc. I'm just talking about moving forward. 
    Me: 30 // DH: 30
    TTC #1: July 2016
    BFP - Sept 2016 // MC - Sept 2016
    TTC #1 (version 2.0): May 2017
    BFP - Sept 2017 // EDD - June 2, 2018 // DD born June 6, 2018
  • @doxiemoxie212 - The people that run admin and the people that design websites aren't the same. UX engineers aren't something that many companies spend a lot of money on. It would be nice if admin could do their job instead of passing the buck. It would also be nice if TB paid for a better web design, but that is a much more involved process. 
    Me: 29 | DH: 29
    Married 12/2016
    DSS born 01/2016
    TTC since 01/2017
    Letrozole + TI = BFP 01/30/2018 | EDD 10/11/2018
    Babysizer Cravings Pregnancy Tracker
    bethennyfrankelvflux33izza2
  • @pebbledam ah yes, my parents thought it would be fun to send me to private school when they could barely afford their mortgage so I grew up surrounded by wealth though not able to participate in it. I live in manhattan now so much of the same, though admittedly DH's family does have money. 

    @vflux33 half Jewish, half black. Ain't no country clubs for DH! Lol (I laugh... but yet... sigh) 
    Me: 30 // DH: 30
    TTC #1: July 2016
    BFP - Sept 2016 // MC - Sept 2016
    TTC #1 (version 2.0): May 2017
    BFP - Sept 2017 // EDD - June 2, 2018 // DD born June 6, 2018
    vflux33Sailing_MamaKariAnn323
  • @doxiemoxie212 I so feel you on the private school thing. My dad was a doctor but they divorced when I was young. Grew up solidly middle class. Went to an expensive private school on a full academic scholarship and those kids tortured me for being "poor". It was an awful experience. I begged her to put me in public school for HS and she finally relented. 

    Me: 35, Hubbie: 33
    Married DH: 2013
    DD: Dec 2015
    BFP 8/14/17 --> Due 4/27/2018

    Babysizer Geeky Pregnancy Tracker

    doxiemoxie212
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