IVF with donor eggs

JamieH2000

@laurad75- o thats a great gift for her! and it will mean so much since she specifically commented on decorating! I can't wait for her to get stimming! I found that part really stressful, despite the numbers being really good. I think most are pleasantly surprised with how many eggs for a donor, vs unpleasantly surprised when you have DOR and get less than they expect. I feel like when they have lots of follicles, they don't measure them all super carefully (it is probably hard to measure 15-20 or more). Anyways, hang in there- we are here for you!

radmom27

@laurad75 I love the idea of giving her an ornament and card.  I was struggling with thinking about what to do for my donor.  I wrote her a card but may give her a little gift too.  
@JamieH2000 Good luck at your hysteroscopy!!

AFM, my donor retrieval is Wednesday!!  I heard she has 30 or so follicles so I'm really hoping to get at least 20.  I haven't been nervous up to this point, but now I'm definitely nervous.  

JamieH2000

@radmom27-omg that is so soon and it sounds like she has a ton of follicles!! How many eggs/embryos did she get in any past cycles? Remind me, are you synced up and doing a fresh transfer?! So excited for you this week!

laurad75

@radmom27 Tomorrow!  Oh my gosh, that's so exciting.  Good luck and keep us posted!!

radmom27

@JamieH2000 I think there were 7-8 that made it to Day 5 on her previous retrieval.  I think she initially had between 20-30 eggs.  We are doing a freeze all cycle with PGS testing and then a frozen transfer 12/5.  Luckily, I only have to wait until PGS testing is done and then we can transfer so I'm kind of synced up but synced for frozen.  I'm SO NERVOUS!!
I'll let you all know the news when I get it tomorrow.  I'm hoping for a nice pre-Thanksgiving gift   

JamieH2000

@radmom27- I can't wait to hear your results today!! I am so excited for you and it sounds like a great donor!!! These next 5/6 days were so hard for me... but for once the odds are in our favor for GOOD news! Please keep us posted! That is  great they could sync you up and your transfer should be so soon!!

@laurad75- your donor starts today right?! Do you know when her first monitoring/update will be?!

AFM- Hysterscopy went fine yesterday. She said there wasn't as much to remove as she thought, so sounds like there just a few small ones. They did an endo scratch too. I am planning to stop BC after friday, and hopefully have a bleed before Wednesday so I can have a baseline on Wed before the long Thanksgiving weekend here. They did say they needed a pre-auth to come in before I start stimming, so now I am worrying about that and trying to get ahold of the finance department. Always something!!!

laurad75

@JamieH2000 - always something for sure. Yes, my donor starts stims tonight and I will start getting updates on the 21st.  I went in for the ultrasound today and she said everything looked fine so we are full steam ahead.  

radmom27

@JamieH2000--I'm so glad your hysteroscopy went well!  I'm so glad there were no surprises!!
@laurad75 Yay for your donor starting today!!!  Glad your US went well.
I JUST got the egg report.  My donor had 33 eggs retrieved with 26 mature.  They are being fertilized using ICSI so I should know tomorrow how things went.  I'm really happy with this first update.  Hoping at least 20 fertilize!!  I've been so calm about all of this until last night....Very tense day but I'm so happy with the outcome.  

prudence9-2

@radmom27 that amazing!!! So happy for you!!!

JamieH2000

@laurad75- yay for everything looking good on your end!!

@radmom27- wow!! That is a great amount and I think you are gonna end up with more than you know what to do with  

laurad75

@radmom27 My heart is pounding, that's amazing news.  33?!  Please update us with the fert report. 

This gives me so much hope that this may work.  

radmom27

My fert report is in: all 26 fertilized!!  
@laurad75 I'm trying to not think about the ultimate outcome but I'm so hoping that this will work.  

laurad75

@radmom27 Holy shit!  That's amazing. 

JamieH2000

@radmom27- WOW! Couldn't be happier for you! I think its gonna be a great number. I would hope at least 50-75% make it to blast and at least 75% of those are PGS normal if your donor is under 30!

rallykat14

Hi ladies... I intro'd a while back but then got in a really low place about IVF not working for me.  We met with the Dr and he agrees that there is no point in continuing to try to  get something with my eggs.   So we also called the donor specialist.   Now we are trying to decide fresh transfer or frozen  and then obviously  freeze what is left.   We get 6 eggs... So not trying to get too excited that it will equal six embryos.   How did you prioritze your list of wants from a donor? 

Has anyone used CNY fertility with donorneggs?? 

laurad75

Hi @rallykat14. Welcome to this path. I was going to start by saying I am sorry that you are here but I actually don’t like it when people say they are ‘sorry’ we had to use DE. This is how we are going to get our family and it’s a really beautiful option. 

Anyway, we opted for fresh because our insurance will cover some of it and we are likely to get more eggs this way.  I’m picking a donor we focused on women who were local to us and then first looked at physical characteristics (I’m fair skinned/ blue eyes). Of those women we read through profiles and questionnaires and picked the one that we liked the most. 

We used Northeast Assisted Fertility Group and they were expensive but great to work with and had the highest quality of donors that we found. Find out if your clinic has an in-house data base or specific agencies that they like to work with and that’s a good start. 

rallykat14

@laurad75 thank you!  Yes they have huge list with extensive profile information that we started to go through.   Bummer that no matter fresh or frozen they only give me 6 eggs.   I guess my first question should be what if they only produce 5 eggs! 

radmom27

@rallykat14 Welcome to the group!  I like what laurad75 said in her introduction about not being sorry about having to use donor eggs...I'm excited that we have this opportunity to grow our family.  
It's hard to pick a donor.  We looked for physical characteristics similar to my own heavily weighting level of education.  We then picked from there about particular answers in the donor questionnaire.  
Why do you only get 6 eggs with a fresh cycle?
AFM..I got a Day 3 update yesterday.  Out of 26 that fertilized, 25 are all 6 cells or above and are on track.  Here's the breakdown:

3 – 6 cell

6 – 7 cell

14– 8 cell

2 - 9 cell 

We should know a final count by Tuesday before they get sent for PGS testing.  It's hard not to be a little excited but I'm trying to be cautiously optimistic at this point.  

@laurad75 Any updates about how your donor is doing with stims?

rallykat14

@radmom27 that's an amazing report!!!  From everything I can tell you only get 6 eggs... Can purchase 2 more for $2k I believe... 

laurad75

@rallykat14 That's usually the situation for frozen but I have never heard only getting the lot of 6 for fresh. You would get 6 and then they would just have to freeze the rest anyway.  I would look into that a little more to make sure there isn't another option.  Or, it you are open to going to another clinic you should be able to find one that does a true fresh cycle where you get all the eggs.  

@radmom27 That's such great news!  My donor starts daily (either each day or every other depending on her response) monitoring tomorrow so I will get a call after each of her appointments.  We are rolling now!  

JamieH2000

@rallykat14- Good to hear from you again! I can't recall anyone on here who has used CNY for DE, but I feel like there may be a CNY DE facebook group based on some comments in some of the FB groups I am in. I think they essentially do forced shared cycles, where each person only gets 6 eggs, which is why the cost is so much less than other clinic. I think its a great option depending on finances. If you are able to afford a full fresh cycle at another clinic, and you want 2 or more children, that may be something to look into. I agree with the others that DE is a beautiful option and a blessing that we can do this, but that doesn't mean that there isn't a loss of having a genetic child. Its ok to be sad and grieve. Personally for me, I don't think i will feel 100% accepting about the loss of my genes until I am holding that child in my arms. I hope one day I look back at this time and will be thankful for this journey since it will hopefully have led to the children that are meant for me. So many ladies who have done DE or adopted say that once they have those children, they wouldn't want it any other way. That is what gets me through on the "why me" days.

@radmom27- Wow, the great numbers continue!! 25 strong on day 3 is AMAZING! I can't wait to hear the final number!!

@laurad75- So excited for your update- tomorrow right?! Hope you are hanging in there!!

laurad75

JamieH2000 said:

@rallykat14- Good to hear from you again! I can't recall anyone on here who has used CNY for DE, but I feel like there may be a CNY DE facebook group based on some comments in some of the FB groups I am in. I think they essentially do forced shared cycles, where each person only gets 6 eggs, which is why the cost is so much less than other clinic. 

Ah, so its a thing at CNY - that makes sense.  Look, from a finance point of view I guess there are advantages but like Jamie said, if you do want more than one I would compare the cost of doing a fresh cycle with a clinic that can do a cycle that's not shared.  

Yes, I get my update tomorrow.  I'm also stopping by the clinic in the afternoon to drop off my gift and note for my donor.  It was really emotional for me to write the note but it was important to me for her to read my words in my writing.  It's crazy that the 'donor part' of all this will be over within the next couple of weeks.  

radmom27

@laurad75 Crossing my fingers for a good update today!
@JamieH2000 I went through a time of grief, mourning and bitterness that my own eggs didn't work out.  The farther along I get in this process, I find myself briefly forgetting about the genetics and just having pure excitement about the possibility of success.  This whole journey has been quite a process.  
@rallykat14 Now I get the 6 eggs thing.  How do they decide who gets which eggs out of the lot?  
AFM...We sent 15 blasts to be biopsied for PGS testing with an additional 4 frozen blasts that we chose not to PGS test (we made a decision to only test 15 due to cost).  There are still 6 other embryos that may make it until today (day 6).  I can honestly say that for the first time in four years, that I feel excited and hopeful about all of this.  I'm also kicking myself that we didn't do this sooner.  

JamieH2000

@laurad75- Anxiously awaiting your update today! I bet your donor will love your note and gift

@radmom27- HOLY COW! so 19 day 5 blasts and potentially 6 day 6 blasts?! That is probably one of the best donor cycle results I have seen!! Are you allowed to donate extra? Our donor would not agree to it unfortunately... since I hope to not have to use all 12 to get the amount of children we want! That is interesting about kicking yourself for not doing it sooner. I feel like a lot of ladies say that once they get to this point. One of the reasons we moved to DE relatively quickly was because so many people say they wish they had done it sooner. I think its good to exhaust all your other options though so you have no regrets. I think we may end up being transfer buddies

AFM- I am almost scared to write this and jinx myself honestly... but I had my baseline today and my lining was thin and no cysts, with 5 AFC. They only need one to grow to get the lining to grow, so hopefully that will work. Assuming bloodwork is ok when they call later, I think we are starting to stim tomorrow or Thurs. That would put transfer around 12/8ish maybe? I refuse to get my hopes up after being cancelled so much this fall tho...

laurad75

@JamieH2000 I'm anxious to get the update as well!  My nurse usually calls me later in the day and she told me to stop by anytime after 1 so I will probably just get the report then.  Good news on your baseline.  FX you stay on track!

I have also heard a lot of women say they wish they did DE sooner and while I am happy we moved on when we did, I think we needed to do the cycles before we felt good about moving on. We felt perfectly confident to move to DE when we did and although sometimes I wonder if I should have tried another opinion or insisted on a different protocol, I feel very confident that it was the right time to move on.  I hope this works for all of us.  

laurad75

I just got the update from my nurse.  My donor is doing great and already has 8 measurable follicles - my nurse was really excited about that.  She is going back tomorrow and I guess daily until she triggers which could be as early as Thursday or Friday.  

Before I got the call I was really sad because I went to the clinic to drop off the gift for my donor and I was so excited to give it to my nurse.  My nurse never got the message that I was waiting for her so I sat there like an asshole for 40 minutes and then was told I should just leave the gift at the front desk.  I almost cried leaving because the gift was so important to me and I was really nervous to just leave it there.  My nurse called as soon as I got back to apologize and tell me she has the gift so its safe now.  I felt silly getting emotional over a little disappointment but I guess it all makes sense. 

Yay for good news.  More coming tomorrow.  

JamieH2000

@laurad75- Yay for a strong start!! so exited for daily updates  and also that sucks they made you wait for 40 mins, but glad the gift is safe with the nurse now!! Its all coming together!!

radmom27

@JamieH2000 Your baseline exam sounds PERFECT!!  Hopefully you are on the way to being my transfer buddy.  I think I am allowed to donate the remainder of my embryos which I will most definitely do.  This whole fertility journey has made me realize what a gift egg/sperm/embryo donation can be.  
@laurad75 Sounds like a great start for your donor!!!  We're all having a good news day.
AFM, my final frozen embryo report is in.  21 FROZEN!!!!  I am beyond happy.  Now just hoping that my body gets on board and thickens up my lining for my transfer in two weeks.  

JamieH2000

@radmom27- omg 21 frozen!! That is an insane result!!! I can only imagine that most of the 15 will be PGS normal, with that type of quality!! 
AFM- cleared by baseline and started stims tonight!! Hopefully the follicles respond enough to get a good lining! Transfer would hopefully be in maybe 2.5 weeks? I go in Friday- not loving all the shots and monitoring again!

c-town18

Great updates, ladies!  Keep them coming, this is awesome. 

rallykat14 - I definitely have some advice on choosing a fresh donor for you!  I am coming off of a failed donor cycle and starting a new one with a different donor; our first donor cycle failed because our donor responded poorly to the stim meds and we were only expecting to get 4-5 eggs on trigger day, so we canceled. For this reason I say choose a proven donor if at all possible.  It will give you some peace of mind and also your clinic will have her past cycle records so they know how she will respond, what doses to use, etc. that way they aren't going in blind. 

For looks, I tried to pick someone who was reasonably attractive and also had my basic attributes (caucasian, tall-ish, brown hair, lighter eyes).  For personality, I once read that you should choose someone who based on their profile you could see yourself being friends with. Not sure if that sounds weird, but I liked that advice.  I started out with a crazy picky list and was having trouble finding someone who was available and met all my criteria, so I had to ease up on some things. In the end these are the things that mattered to me. Also, if you can find someone local it will save you thousands on donor travel expenses. Good luck and keep us posted. 

c-town18

Did/does anyone's clinic require your donor to have DNA karyotyping done before they are medically approved for a donor cycle(?!)  Mine new clinic is saying that they require it; this totally seems like overkill to me so I'm trying to see if other clinics require it too (my last one did not). It takes 2-3 weeks to get results back and if my insurance does not cover it is expensive. Sigh. 

c-town18

JamieH2000 and laurad75 - did you decide yet if you are going to transfer 1 or 2? 

JamieH2000

@chitown16- I don't believe my donor had karyotyping... there was genetic testing done for many genetic diseases, but not sure if that is karyotyping?  At this point, we have our consents filled out for two. We can still change our mind for 1, we just have to have the consents changed. I still go back and forth honestly.... I know 1 is lower risk.... but mentally, financially, etc doing 1 and having it fail will be really hard. I know we can handle two financially and in our relationship, the risks just still scare me of course. However a singleton doesn't mean that risks are zero either... its a hard one!

laurad75

@chitown16 I don't know anything about karyotyping.  I know they did a full panel blood test to rule out any genetic issues.  

We are transferring 1. 

JamieH2000

@laurad75- How is your donor doing?! THinking of you!!!

AFM- Had monitoring this morning and no follies above 10mm yet and the lining is only starting to thicken. I guess I wouldn't expect more than that with only 3 nights of stims and I was still spotting through Tuesday. So I'm ok with this as long as we can get a follie to grow. I feel like my estorgen is rising and some aching in my ovaries, so I think it took a few days for them to wake up after all the BC for the last 5 months.

laurad75

@JamieH2000 glad to hear you are on track!

my donor is doing awesome! Yesterday the report was 13 follies on the right and 9 on the left. I should be getting a call soon with today’s report and she might be triggering tonight or tomorrow. I also believe she picked up my gift last night which made me feel good. 

How was everyones Thanksgiving?

PNW12RN

Hello! I posted on the January IVF board as well, but wanted to follow this thread as well.

I am planning a January FET using an embryo created from my sister's egg.  We only had one embryo make it to blast, so we get one shot.  So jealous of the high numbers some of you are getting from your donors!  My sister had just turned 36 when she donated, so she was well out of the range where she'd have been allowed to donate to anyone but a family member.  She was really bummed that we did not end up with more eggs (there were 8 retrieved, but only one made it all the way through to be frozen).  My sister was a gestational surrogate twice and she was over the moon happy to be able to help an actual family member with fertility issues. 

Anyone else in the 'known donor' boat? 

JamieH2000

@laurad75- soo exciting!! So did she tryigger last night or tonight?! You are only like 1 week from being PUPO!! I think you are also gonna end up with more embryos than you know what to do with

@pnw12rn- welcome! I have been on the boards for 1.5 years now so I recognize your name and miracle story!! Soo many prayers your one embryo is another miracle baby for you none of us are doing known donations but I think that’s great that your sister was willing to do that!! Mine probably would have, but neither have children of their own yet so that wasn’t an option for us really. Please stick around and keep us updated!

@radmom27- any PGS updates?! Transfer is in a week or so right?!

AFM- just hoping my follicles and lining is growing...8 start ganirelax tomorrow night and go on Monday morning. Should have a better idea then. Once I trigger, I check progestone 3 days later and if it’s high enough to show ovulation, we transfer 4 days later (7 days after trigger). So if everything looks good, I’m hunting we are 10-12 days from transfer maybe!

laurad75

My donor triggers tomorrow! She has 12 follies on the left and 14 on the right.  I’ll get a call Monday after ER with results and then Tues with the fertilization report and we will schedule the transfer then but it will likely be Saturday - a week from today!!

@JamieH2000 we will be so close! 

JamieH2000

@laurad75- omg this is it!!! Sooo exciting!!! Do they expect all of the follicles to be mature! 26 would be a great number! We started with 25 eggs and 22 mature so I think you will definitely end up with double digit embryos! What days will they give you updates?