I'm so sorry you guys are going through this!! The unknown would drive me nuts as I would just want to know what I should be planning for. I hope the appointment today goes well!
@hp_momma I'm sorry you're going through this. Being in limbo is terrifying and so frustrating. I have growth scan next week since my doc is starting to expect IUGR as well. At our anatomy scan the baby was measuring at where he should have been for 18 weeks, but was still a little on the smaller side. Since then they have become concerned since im still loosing weight at 27 weeks and my fundal height is behind so they wanna take a look. They did the same thing to me when I was pregnant with my son 2 years ago and he is a perfectly healthy 2 year old. He's just as the ped says "on the petite side". He's currently at 2 years in the 10% for height. My husband is only 5'8" and I'm only 5'3" so it kinda makes sense.
It's positive to see that while yes the baby is still measuring small the % is still the same and not getting worse. I was told that that is actually a good thing last time. Hoping all goes well and you little nugget is just petite like my little guy.....we are all here for support and I'm glad you're sharing your story with us
Thank you for sharing your story and I'm sorry your having to go through the uncertainty too! I keep trying to remind myself how nice it is to see LO at so many ultrasounds where usually I would have seen him for the last time at 20wks!
DH is 6ft and I'm 5'8 so it's a little out of the ordinary that we would have little peanuts, but my grandma also reminded me recently that my 6'5 dad was born tiny at only 6lbs! My DD1 is around 40% for height at 5yrs but DD2 is quite the peanut at 9%! It's actually something that we have been following with her pediatrician, so in the back of my head I'm wondering if this LO is along the same lines as his sister or if there is some underlying genetic condition between both of them.
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@hp_momma , I know this is definitely not the same situation that you are dealing with, but during my pregnancy with DS, at every US all of his parts were measuring very average, but his abdomen measured in the 98th percentile. The doctors were concerned (leading to me having to do multiple glucose tests because GD can cause that), but they could never put their finger on a diagnosis. He was born and his abdomen was definitely a little big, but now at 2.5 years old, everything has averaged out and it seems like it was just the way his body developed. Now, pregnant with DD, at every ultrasound her abdomen is also measuring large (around 95th percentile) while everything else is average. Sometimes I think that these precise ultrasounds can pick up on "problems" that turn out to be nothing or just minor blips on the developmental rada...I sincerely hope that is the case for you, but if not, it sounds like you are in good hands!
@Kipperoo Ultrasounds are so tricky. On one hand they pick up tiny little blips and on the other hand they aren't quite precise enough to always get an actual diagnosis. They can sure cause momma's lots of stress!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Update: Our ultrasound this morning showed LO measuring at 2lbs 2oz and we even got to see him practice his breathing. He's breach which explains all the jabs to my bladder. Met with another MFM doctor as mine was out of town today. She wasn't as detailed as my normal doctor but she said everything was showing positive growth.
Overall he's in the 10% now, increase from 7-8%. Head measuring steady at 34% Chest measuring steady at 25% Long bones have shown the most improvement from 1-2% to now 5-7%. All other aspects of baby look "normal" and healthy!
Because he's now measuring in the 10% overall it technically means he is within the normal range. But because his long bones are still measuring smaller, I'll continue with the growth ultrasounds. Next one is in 3 weeks.
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Yaye for the positive results at your appointment today. The uncertainty is unsettling but glad your baby is continuing to steadily grow. Will be sending many good vibes your way.
Side note: how very stressful it must've been/must be to handle all of this while taking care of your other kiddos and your H away. Before I became a mom, I always gave it up to moms and called them "supermoms" because of how much strength the job calls for. Now that I am a mom, there's a hardly a way to describe the "aw" you feel when you see a fellow mom "going through it" but handling it "so gracefully." Take it one day at a time. We are all here for you!
Yesterday the pediatric geneticist called me to introduce himself and then today a representative from the NICU called me to schedule a time for me to meet the neonatologist and tour the NICU. Both of these phone calls were apparently "referrals" from my MFM doctor that I didn't know where coming.
I'm feeling very overwhelmed. Every conversation we've had with the MFM doctor has been one of three scenarios; skeletal dysplasia, IUGR, or absolutely nothing wrong. I've had multiple conversations about how I more than likely will deliver around 38-39wks. I feel blindsided. Like he either isn't telling us the whole picture and there is more that we should be worried about or he is being super overly cautious. All of these phone calls, upcoming appointments, ultrasounds, NSTs are making me feel very stressed and I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be thinking. Am I supposed to be more worried than I am? Is the likelyhood that something is wrong higher probability than what I think is going on? Why do I need to meet with the NICU if I should deliver around 38wks?
DH is an optimist and keeps saying "there is probably nothing wrong with the baby" and that the doctor is just "typical overly cautious military". I know it's partly his defense of trying to push the negative thoughts away but I feel like it's mostly on my shoulders. Plus he's getting ready to leave for weeks and it literally will just be me at the appointments/meetings.
Sorry for the vent session and AWing myself, I just needed to write it all down and get it all out to relieve some stress.
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@hp_momma sorry you're going through all of this! I can imagine how stressed you must feel and even though your H is trying to stay positive (mine does this too) you still feel like you're carrying it all on your shoulders. Hang in there and you vent all you want!
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
@hp_momma I hear you about feeling overwhelmed. I've found that the extra consults can help make the unknowns less scary. Knowing what to expect with the worst case scenario in mind may end up being unnecessary but might save some of the grief if that scenario does occur and you weren't at least a little prepared. Not to say how you should feel about all of this by any means. Solidarity hugs, mama!
@hp_momma I hear you about feeling overwhelmed. I've found that the extra consults can help make the unknowns less scary. Knowing what to expect with the worst case scenario in mind may end up being unnecessary but might save some of the grief if that scenario does occur and you weren't at least a little prepared. Not to say how you should feel about all of this by any means. Solidarity hugs, mama!
The unknown makes it so overwhelming. But I think your right that it may ease some of my stress if I know what to expect in the worst case scenario. When the NICU representative today called she said I should prepare a list of questions to ask the neonatologist. I have no idea even what to ask when I don't know the scenario, which I think made me more overwhelmed.
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
I'm sorry your MFM didn't give you a heads up about the additional consults, that would throw me off too.
I do agree with your husband though, if they have the specialists in house and they know cost isn't an issue (because Tricare) some providers can be pretty liberal with the referrals. I wouldn't necessarily take it as a sign you are underestimating risks, they just have a lot of free tools at their disposal.
Sounds like its your husband's turn for bedtime and you get to go pick up some ice cream or something.
I'm sorry your MFM didn't give you a heads up about the additional consults, that would throw me off too.
I do agree with your husband though, if they have the specialists in house and they know cost isn't an issue (because Tricare) some providers can be pretty liberal with the referrals. I wouldn't necessarily take it as a sign you are underestimating risks, they just have a lot of free tools at their disposal.
Sounds like its your husband's turn for bedtime and you get to go pick up some ice cream or something.
That's a good point about the free tools at their disposal. Everything is literally all in the same hospital so everyone just keeps mentioning to "pop over to the NICU after your appointment" or "the geneticist will try to stop upstairs after your ultrasound".
I'm definitely making husband on bedtime duty tonight and attempting to relax!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
@hp_momma I am totally with you about not knowing what the heck to ask about. DH is not in the medical field so he's usually the one with the best questions. Essentially, he wants to know 1) what their best guess is about what is going on, 2) how we got here, and 3) what comes next. Having MFM and neo lay out those basics helped him / us a lot (e.g. MFM went all the way back to how twins form to postulate how we ended up with one very average baby and one really struggling baby, then got into where the evidence is about how to manage what we think is going on, and how that affects other decisions [or prior wishes] like mode of delivery, timing of delivery, etc; neo met with us on day 1 of admission and went head to toe talking about how our babies might need support and what items would need to be "checked off" before they can graduate).
So so sorry to hear you'll be flying solo for appts. Not easy in any case.
I know I'm not quite in your league but I'm having the uncertainty feelings as well. This vague limbo waiting for the bad stuff to happen. Had a Dr's appointment every day or night last week till Saturday. Definitely hoping you get dome answers soon for your lo. I do remember when I was in the army they just love to dole out tests and consults. That's a plus to civilian medicine who are stingy or less inclusive. I'm glad to hear nothing wrong is an option and fx that you lo ends up in that category
@hp_momma Not quite sure how military medicine works, but is there a way you can call or email your doctor to inquire about the reason(s) for the referrals? It might ease your mind a bit hearing it directly from the source...
Sending lots of good vibes your way and hoping you're able to de-stress a bit tonight.
@mdlorenz That's a good list of questions to start from. I'm writing those down and maybe it will help me brainstorm some other ideas. I guess I feel sort of strange touring a NICU as well when there's a possibility I won't even need it. But then I understand why they would want us to even if their was a possibility. It's just so many unknowns. I feel like the geneticist is the one who may be able to answer the most questions for me although he even mentioned on the phone that until he has baby in front of him, it's hard to speculate as an ultrasound can only tell so little.
@Yiggle09 Uncertainty of any magnitude in pregnancy is nerve wracking! Your exactly right that it is just this limbo of waiting for something to happen...
@mrsrep123 I do have my MFM doctors contact info, but I know he's away at training for another week or so, but emailing him might be a good idea. I'm also dealing with a fellowship program (he's in the final year of his fellowship) so that makes me question too if he's being overly cautious with referrals because of that...
Thank you all for being my sounding board and for talking my stress level down. DH is really supportive but sometimes I think he just doesn't get the pregnancy hormone aspect of it all!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
I'm so sorry you're going through all of this and I hope that we get good news about you and your LO soon. Hang in there!
When I was pregnant with DD we got and IUGR diagnosis because she was measuring small. I had to go into the high risk center 2 times a week for monitoring, had to change my diet to pack in more protien and felt overall miserable because she's my rainbow baby and I was terrified about not knowing what to expect. Fast forward to now I have a very tiny almost 2 year old with a spunky personality who was wrongly diagnosed because it turns out a low percentage (I can't remember what) of babies diagnosed with IUGR actally really have a growth restriction. According to DD's pediatrician, she's just petite, but perfectly healthy.
If the MFM is at training someone should be covering his TCONs (when you leave a message via the scheduler or nurse). Also if they have you guys using Relay Health and the doc is on there someone should be covering those while he is out at well. Either way someone should get back to you within 3 days.
@hp_momma sorry for the surprising consults! I would be worried that I should be more stressed too but hopefully like PPs said they are just being cautious and are trying to help ease your mind. Since DH is going to be away for several of your appointments is there any chance you have someone you could take with you to either help you listen or to come up with more questions? Obviously I have no idea what DH schedule is like but is it possible for him to face time for the appointments if ok with the provider? It helps so much to have a second set of ears when learning about stressful situations. Hoping these appointments will help you know what to expect in worst case scenario.
Remember how NICU called to schedule me a time to come tour at the request of my MFM doctor? Now NICU calls me today and says the doctor called them and said to cancel the tour... which is weird because I haven't seen doctor in 3wks since my last growth ultrasound. So either he's back in town and got a chance to review the ultrasound and something has changed (for the positive) or I have no idea. He's definitely not the best at communicating. I mean I'm glad I don't need to tour the NICU, because it was stressing me out. But now I'm confused. Lots of questions for my doctor on Friday!
Married 03.09.09 Sweet Baby H 12.21.11 Sassy Baby P 03.26.14 Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Re: Possible Growth Restriction/Skeletal Dysplasia UPDATE
DH is 6ft and I'm 5'8 so it's a little out of the ordinary that we would have little peanuts, but my grandma also reminded me recently that my 6'5 dad was born tiny at only 6lbs! My DD1 is around 40% for height at 5yrs but DD2 is quite the peanut at 9%! It's actually something that we have been following with her pediatrician, so in the back of my head I'm wondering if this LO is along the same lines as his sister or if there is some underlying genetic condition between both of them.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Overall he's in the 10% now, increase from 7-8%.
Head measuring steady at 34%
Chest measuring steady at 25%
Long bones have shown the most improvement from 1-2% to now 5-7%.
All other aspects of baby look "normal" and healthy!
Because he's now measuring in the 10% overall it technically means he is within the normal range. But because his long bones are still measuring smaller, I'll continue with the growth ultrasounds. Next one is in 3 weeks.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
Married:09/14/13
Baby 2 - Due: 5/4/17
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
#1 DD Aug 2014 @39weeks via CS
#2 Due May 2,2017 hopeful VBAC
Side note: how very stressful it must've been/must be to handle all of this while taking care of your other kiddos and your H away. Before I became a mom, I always gave it up to moms and called them "supermoms" because of how much strength the job calls for. Now that I am a mom, there's a hardly a way to describe the "aw" you feel when you see a fellow mom "going through it" but handling it "so gracefully." Take it one day at a time. We are all here for you!
DS1 7/24/15
DS2 5/7/17
I'm feeling very overwhelmed. Every conversation we've had with the MFM doctor has been one of three scenarios; skeletal dysplasia, IUGR, or absolutely nothing wrong. I've had multiple conversations about how I more than likely will deliver around 38-39wks. I feel blindsided. Like he either isn't telling us the whole picture and there is more that we should be worried about or he is being super overly cautious. All of these phone calls, upcoming appointments, ultrasounds, NSTs are making me feel very stressed and I'm not sure what I'm supposed to be thinking. Am I supposed to be more worried than I am? Is the likelyhood that something is wrong higher probability than what I think is going on? Why do I need to meet with the NICU if I should deliver around 38wks?
DH is an optimist and keeps saying "there is probably nothing wrong with the baby" and that the doctor is just "typical overly cautious military". I know it's partly his defense of trying to push the negative thoughts away but I feel like it's mostly on my shoulders. Plus he's getting ready to leave for weeks and it literally will just be me at the appointments/meetings.
Sorry for the vent session and AWing myself, I just needed to write it all down and get it all out to relieve some stress.
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
"A day without laughter is a day wasted." ~Charlie Chaplin
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
I do agree with your husband though, if they have the specialists in house and they know cost isn't an issue (because Tricare) some providers can be pretty liberal with the referrals. I wouldn't necessarily take it as a sign you are underestimating risks, they just have a lot of free tools at their disposal.
Sounds like its your husband's turn for bedtime and you get to go pick up some ice cream or something.
May '17 labor memes
I'm definitely making husband on bedtime duty tonight and attempting to relax!
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
So so sorry to hear you'll be flying solo for appts. Not easy in any case.
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Sending lots of good vibes your way and hoping you're able to de-stress a bit tonight.
DS1 7/24/15
DS2 5/7/17
@Yiggle09 Uncertainty of any magnitude in pregnancy is nerve wracking! Your exactly right that it is just this limbo of waiting for something to happen...
@mrsrep123 I do have my MFM doctors contact info, but I know he's away at training for another week or so, but emailing him might be a good idea. I'm also dealing with a fellowship program (he's in the final year of his fellowship) so that makes me question too if he's being overly cautious with referrals because of that...
Thank you all for being my sounding board and for talking my stress level down. DH is really supportive but sometimes I think he just doesn't get the pregnancy hormone aspect of it all!
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
When I was pregnant with DD we got and IUGR diagnosis because she was measuring small. I had to go into the high risk center 2 times a week for monitoring, had to change my diet to pack in more protien and felt overall miserable because she's my rainbow baby and I was terrified about not knowing what to expect. Fast forward to now I have a very tiny almost 2 year old with a spunky personality who was wrongly diagnosed because it turns out a low percentage (I can't remember what) of babies diagnosed with IUGR actally really have a growth restriction. According to DD's pediatrician, she's just petite, but perfectly healthy.
May '17 labor memes
I mean I'm glad I don't need to tour the NICU, because it was stressing me out. But now I'm confused. Lots of questions for my doctor on Friday!
Sweet Baby H 12.21.11
Sassy Baby P 03.26.14
Little Brother Due 05.22.17
1st Baby 5/12/17, Henry