June 2017 Moms

FFFC - 12/17 Edition

2

Re: FFFC - 12/17 Edition

  • @kyreno11 I do too.  And did throughout my entire pregnancy with DD3.

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  • EmeraldNC said:
    @krex I don't think that is too terrible.  I ended up having a c-section, and honestly felt relieved.  This will probably be flamed, but I was WAYYYY more terrified of giving birth vaginally than being cut open.

    Whoa now... careful i still have sunburn from the flaming I got about a similar opinion. :-)
  • CapricaAndreaCapricaAndrea member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Photogenic Name Dropper
    edited February 17
    Here's my slightly more political confession: I hate that it's always referred to as "gender" with babies. Gender is what a person identifies themselves as, not what their genitals are.

    I understand that it's weird to call something a "sex reveal party" or whatever. I've even found myself slipping and asking people for recommendations for bizarre tests to "predict" gender (so we can do them all as part of a shower game) because it's so prevalent to talk about baby's gender, when in reality our baby could grow up to identify anywhere on the gender scale regardless of genitals. 


    Edited to add: oops, didn't realize this was a topic already addressed, I've only been here for 2 weeks! 
  • Here's my slightly more political confession: I hate that it's always referred to as "gender" with babies. Gender is what a person identifies themselves as, not what their genitals are.

    I understand that it's weird to call something a "sex reveal party" or whatever. I've even found myself slipping and asking people for recommendations for bizarre tests to "predict" gender (so we can do them all as part of a shower game) because it's so prevalent to talk about baby's gender, when in reality our baby could grow up to identify anywhere on the gender scale regardless of genitals. 
    This is actually pretty popular, especially here on the bump.

    CapricaAndreadevow27
  • @EmeraldNC where were you for @neludelu thread?! Nel, don't worry, we won't head back that way but for real...Emerald, I'll direct you back to "Tearing vs. C section" thread. It's all there.

    @Elyse1384 "bat signal crusty" almost made me spit out my water. 

    FFFC: DS and I were snuggling up this AM and I noticed his lower back felt wet. Once I determined it was not poop (via sniff test) and was just because his diaper was reeeeaalll wet, I decided to not give a f$*% and continued to sleep/snuggle in our bed for 45 more minutes. 
    I still haven't stripped the bed yet. Whatevs. 
    Me: 29
    DH: 29
    DS: 18 months 4/2/2015
    Baby #2 EDD: 6/1/2017 
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    Stankonia2014silliegirlie143Elyse1384JessyKV
  • OK, I'll probably get flamed for this one, especially considering some of the posts already in this thread.

    I majorly judge anyone who gets a non-medically necessary c-section. I can not comprehend how anyone can look at both options and choose a c-section over a vaginal birth. It blows my mind. I think non-medically necessary c-sections should not be allowed, and I think it's borderline unethical/malpractice for doctors to offer them.
    Do you consider having another large baby after a horrible, damaging vaginal delivery medically necessary?  I think it's on the fence for some. I'm just curious what your view is.  
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  • I got nothin... other than lame food stuff.  We are very tame over here...
    devow27awoodruff27Stankonia2014
  • Meh... maybe here is one...

    As long as I don't draw the short straw on PP nurses, I think I will stay in the hospital as long as insurance will allow so I can be selfish and get more mom/baby only time while my folks and DH watch our twins.

    Last time we left over 24 hrs early...
    neludeluAhutch428JessyKVKylieslip24
  • I'm beginning to feel like I would actually LIKE most of you IRL...  ;) I seriously thought my UO about the strip clubs would get a little more back and forth...but nope. I'll dig deeper next week guys. 
    I legit have very little to confess outside of sleeping with my pee soaked toddler...such is life! 
    Me: 29
    DH: 29
    DS: 18 months 4/2/2015
    Baby #2 EDD: 6/1/2017 
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  • @neludelu and @devow27 I saw some of that post... not all of it.  Not that I was able to choose a c-section, it became necessary...  However, I'm just incredibly lucky and had an incredible recovery from a c-section with minimal pain, etc.  It is the only experience I have to base my opinion on.


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  • LAMCH1980 said:
    OK, I'll probably get flamed for this one, especially considering some of the posts already in this thread.

    I majorly judge anyone who gets a non-medically necessary c-section. I can not comprehend how anyone can look at both options and choose a c-section over a vaginal birth. It blows my mind. I think non-medically necessary c-sections should not be allowed, and I think it's borderline unethical/malpractice for doctors to offer them.
    Do you consider having another large baby after a horrible, damaging vaginal delivery medically necessary?  I think it's on the fence for some. I'm just curious what your view is.  
    I think medically necessary should be determined by medical professionals. 
    Wino0920doodleoodle
  • FFFC: I am watching a youtube video from a random hospital to remind myself how to take care of a newborn. I really need to read some of my old books again

    devow27Stankonia2014
  • devow27devow27 member
    500 Love Its 500 Comments Third Anniversary Photogenic
    edited February 17
    @delujm0
    But a c section stats are still riskier then a VBAC stats...so that point is null. Because yes, a VBAC poses a *slightly* more increased risk for uterine rupture, but if you go the RCS route, you're at much high risk for a multitude of things. 

    "Recently, ACOG stated that VBAC is safer than a repeat cesarean, and VBAC with more than one previous cesarean does not pose any increased risk.2" 

    Okay...I'm done...I know we've beat this horse into its second grave. 
    Me: 29
    DH: 29
    DS: 18 months 4/2/2015
    Baby #2 EDD: 6/1/2017 
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  • I will definitely be staying at the hospital for as long as my insurance will pay for, and i will be taking everything i conceivably can home with me. I strongly disagree with  c sections for convenience sake, but I do think that the advantage of a scheduled c section over an emergency c section is enough that I would opt for that if I had a significantly higher risk of ending up with an emergency section. I haven't researched it, because it hadn't come up for me yet, but I'm not sure I would necessarily try for a vbac or a vaginal birth with a breech baby. And I'll take the strip club thing further and say that I am not ok with myself or dh going to a strip club or looking at pornography - I think it is objectifying and that sexuality shouldn't be separated from real relationships where you know and respect the other person as a person. 

    This is all I have for my own confession this week: I don't have a smart phone, and I don't want one. I can't justify the expense when I am somewhere with WiFi and have either a tablet or a laptop with me 95% of the time anyway. 
    Teacher Momdevow27
  • FFC: H is the best man in a wedding over memorial day in Colorado. Its is all very up in the air if he can go or not since I will only be about 2 weeks out from giving birth. I hope he can't go. Because its a holiday weekend everything is an arm and a leg money wise. He needs to be there fro 3 nights and the hotel is over $200 a night plus airfare plus everything else. I didn't feel this way until they planned the bachelor party over Easter weekend in Arizona were everything is crazy expensive as well. 
  • @danijo Neopets still exists! There goes my three day weekend. 

    I actually like that we're "tame." True there isn't really flaming going on but I learn a lot and think it's nice that people can disagree without being bootyheads. 

    I don't post 80% of what I want to because I'm afraid my profile isn't as anonymous as I'd like so I'm paranoid but I also don't want to make a new one. 
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    danijo-2silliegirlie143CurlyMommy416graceriesz
  • @meilay yes, it does. You're welcome. Now go play Meerca chase!
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    meilaymomma2char
  • FFFC: my Grandma is a mean, no downright cruel, woman. She has told my sisters and I that she doesn't love us because we're female. So I have no desire to reach out and include her in my life. She's alone in life and I totally get why.

    The confession part is that I'm too much of a chicken to tell my Dad that when he asks why I don't go visit her or call her or even text her.






  • @EmeraldNC
    I definitely giggled, too!!

    Oh... I can give YOU a fake flaming:  first the big baby hair bows and now pickles?!?! I thought we were going to be friends...




    EmeraldNCmombodawoodruff27
  • Here's a confession, or maybe just a vent.  DH has been out of work now since November.  We are officially at the point where we legitimately can't make all our bills (we already had been slacking on the "non-essentials" - not that any bill is non-essential).  Like I can't pay daycare this week, I don't get paid until next Friday, and I have to pay rent the week after, but I definitely won't have enough for that, next week's daycare, and my car payment with my next paycheck.

    I guess we COULD pull DS from daycare, but then DH can't have flexibility to schedule interviews, etc, and we would lose the daycare spot when he finally does get a job.

    I'm legitimately freaking out right now about the money, and it's killing me.  Oh, and this week I did not get child support from my ex....BUT DH is still paying his child support, so basically that's all he can do for bills with his measly unemployment check.

    He just needs to find a goddamn job already.  
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    CapricaAndrea
  • @awillis13, not a confession, IMO, that's real life. I'm sorry you guys are struggling. I hope he finds something soon! 
    Teacher Mom
  • @MKRLTX I drink my fair share of beer while pregnant. Like maybe one beer a week. Always low ABV and always with food. But man do I enjoy that one beer. Right now there's only 2 Fat Tires left in my refrigerator. Mmmm. 

    My FFFC is pretty lame but it's what I've got: Nome of my extended family knows that I'm pregnant with #2, and I don't think all of my immediate family knows either. I don't see them all regularly and haven't bothered to tell them.
    Stankonia2014devow27silliegirlie143
  • @awillis13 that sounds incredibly stressful! I hope he finds something soon!
  • huge hugs, @awillis13.  I hope he finds something soon!
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    neludelu
  • CapricaAndreaCapricaAndrea member
    250 Love Its 100 Comments Photogenic Name Dropper
    edited February 17
    @awillis13 I totally hear you on this one. DH has a lot of anxiety issues and between that and him going back to school a few years ago, I've been the main breadwinner most of our relationship. We actually filed for bankruptcy last July, which will help in the long run, but means we are on an incredibly tight budget right now. 

    I do freelance work and my last contract ended 3 weeks ago. I have a 1 week contract coming up which will pay 2/3 the amount that DH will make in a month at his PT job, but nothing lined up yet after that. We're behind on a few bills, and need to move at the end of March but don't have enough money saved to be able to pay first/last at a new place so we haven't even started looking yet. 

    Because of his anxiety, and the fact that he's put so much work into his current job, it's very difficult to get DH to look for a new FT job that we will actually be able to live off of once I'm officially on maternity leave. I have to be careful about how I bring it up or else he views it as me calling him a failure, and then he kind of spirals into stress/anxiety/depression. 

    I I guess the FFFC part of this whole thing is that I'm kind of glad his job is really stressing him out right now, and that he had a meeting this morning with the executive director who told him they don't have the money to offer him FT (it's a non-profit so I believe it's actually true) and probably won't for quite some time. It means that he's actually decided on his own that he probably needs to look for a new job. 

    :worried:
  • I guess the FFFC part (which did not get included in the original post) is we are going to Disney in April.  I know people are going to side-eye this, but DH's mom and step father have paid for the vast majority of the trip, and the flights/etc were booked BEFORE DH lost his job.  They paid for all but about $300 in flights, they are paying for the house rental, and the park passes.  So once we get down there, we are responsible for a rental car and food.
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  • @awillis13 no side-eye here. Shit happens, whether plans are made or not. We actually had a very similar issue where his parents bought us a very expensive 10-day Jamaican honeymoon which due to our work schedules got pushed back to only a few months before we filed for bankruptcy. It was all-expenses paid but I leginimtatly worried about how we were going to manage to eat during the actual traveling, and how we would be able to tip our room butlers (like I said, a very expensive trip...) 
    ladylolly89
  • @CapricaAndrea I don't think people who know the full details of the trip will side-eye, it's the people who know DH is out of work but don't necessarily know the details of how the trip is being paid.  
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  • @awillis13, do you have anything you can sell? They have facebook yardsale groups where you can sell stuff almost immediately. Weekends are a great time for it.  I've done this in tough times. I'm sorry you're dealing with this. 
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