TTCAL Check-In January 23rd, 2017

mylittleversailles

@MimoCa Sorry to see you back. Celebrating small victories makes life so much better! And you hit on my real answer to my gtky OF COURSE I want to live in Hobbiton. Gardening and comfy homes and lots of homemade food.

Edit: missing a letter

dpjennifer

1.    Introduce yourself. If you're new, this is the perfect place to jump in and let us know a little about you. Not new, but recently off the bench so hoping to be more active again.  I’ve had 3 MC, and was benched the past few months as I went through RPL testing with an REI specialist. Unfortunately/Fortunately for us the only problems that showed up from testing was a low Vitamin D level for me (so I take a vitamin D vitamin now), and a normal chromosome variant that has nothing to do with TTC.  So about a week ago we were given three options: try naturally again and see what happens, try naturally but take some meds that may not help, or try IVF in case the embryos are the problem (but IVF is super expensive and not covered by insurance).  So at the moment we’re trying natural again for a few cycles to see if we get PG and if it ends up in another MC or if we make it through. I’ve really been having a rough time emotionally for several months and haven’t been as active on here.  Sorry everyone!

2. Status – WTO, I’m on like cycle day 1.

3. Rants/Raves – Right around the time we got our ‘choices’ from the REI specialist, I found out that DH would not be open to pursuing adoption or any other method of having a child that was not biologically ours.  In fact, he’s got more of a ‘what happens, will happen’ state of mind so if it were up to him he would not do any of the testing or IVF.  I’m thankful he’s working with me on this and is willing to try some of these methods, but was sort of blindsided that options I would consider easily are completely off the table now.

4. GTKY: If you could live in any fictional place (book/movie/TV), what would it be and why? Probably Hogwarts.  Or somewhere where I get to be a princess.  J

@nalex420 Sorry about the pregnancy announcements.  Those are always so hard.

vlagrl29 Hawaii!  That sounds awesome right now as well!

@SoonToBeMommaHowe Glad I’m not the only one who had to google Stars Hollow!  I’ve seen a few episodes of Gilmore Girls, but clearly not enough to know what that was.  I’ve thought about watching through the series, but haven’t gotten around to it.

I'm so sorry to see so many of you still here as well.    This is such a rough road for many of us.

mylittleversailles

@dpjennifer I'm sorry to hear all of this. I'm glad you're here, but I'm also sad you need to be,. Hopefully together you can work towards something that will bring you both deep joy and happiness. None of it is easy. I hope you're taking extra good care of yourself. 

You must be getting to the planning stages of this year's garden? Let's talk about it sometime

TScalei

@Artemis618-Im sorry for the bill in the mail - it is always a cruel reminder.

@mimoca- Im glad you stopped bleeding - that is always a good feeling.

@justsuzie @Riversong15 @soontobemommahowe - I was going to say that seasons 9 &10 might be a TW because of the IF storyline. I kind of like how a popular TV show shows how hard it is for some people ttc. It also captures the ridiculousness and hilarity of ttc. Sometimes I feel like Monica Gellar - Im Oing and we need to have sex NOW! lol

@justsuzie - your kickboxing class seems awesome! Great way to get ttcal aggression out.

TScalei

@dpjennifer - glad to see you back participating but sad you still need to be here. ):

amberruka

@dpjennifer nice to see you again (even though it's here). I hope your natural cycles are a success 

Luckyu317

@artemis618, that was a solidarity like. We're just now starting to get the bulk of the bills from our delivery/loss in November. Our bill for the actual delivery came on the same day as I met with our RE, and she benched us. Come on, Universe, give us all a break!

splashmountain

@TScalei have you seen Life in Pieces? *TW It has an episode where one of the characters has a MC, no details of the loss or showing it happen,  but it really goes into how the family responded to the news. I love that shows are talking about if and loss, it's a much bigger issue than some people know, so it was nice to see (even though I bawled through most of it).

TScalei

@pumpkin0913 - no I will have to check that out. I like when shows show mc/IF etc. I feel like most of what you see on TV are accidental pg so its nice to see the other side of things shown.

dpjennifer

Thanks guys!  

@reneeannemm I've started thinking about gardening, yes.    DH got me a mini 4 shelf greenhouse for Christmas that we just set up last weekend! I planted some flowers in little peat pots and cut some sweet potatoes and put them in jars.  So, we'll see what grows soon!

SP128

@MimoCa  Hugs girl.  One small victory at a time. Positive - the sun came out today : )

@artemis295 @Luckyu317  These bills are a slap in the face.  I received a copay in the mail last month for the visit with my doc to make sure the mc was complete.  They never asked me for it when I checked in to my apt so I thought it was part of everything.  I called my insurance company and they told me that only "routine" ob visits were covered.  I explained that meeting with the doc after a mc was "routine."  Sure the hell wasn't my idea of a good time.  The representative told me that a mc is not considered "routine" so therefore I am responsible for the copay.  And here is my middle finger.

Uhlease13

@dpjennifer I'm sure it was a shock to hear DH's thoughts on this process and potential future options. I hope your natural cycles are successful! 

@artemis295 @Luckyu317 we still haven't gotten a bill from our loss in oct. I have pretty good insurance, but I'm worried I'll be blindsided in a few months with a bill or something...so sorry though, that is the worst!!

MimoCa

I can't believe you ladies are getting bills for the loss. I mean whats the point of insurance then? Granted my insurance company keeps sending me baby pamphlets so I guess they haven't realized it yet... and I'm not going to bother telling them oh well.

artemis618

@MimoCa This one was for first tri genetic screening through the state's program.  The NIPT bill came almost instantly (being a private company and all) though I never saw a report (just got the phone call that it was a girl and "normal").  I actually saw the bill for my post mc u/s before quite a few of my first appointment and first tri testing ones - and it was the same office. After my deductible, I pay 10% up to my OOP max, so I see bills for everything...

At least I know it's not just me who's affected by that stuff.  It was just really...annoying yesterday.  Sorry we all have to go thru this

NYTino24

@SP128 Ohhh I'd wanna slap that lady!

SP128

@reneeannemm I know you've talked about acupuncture before. Just wondering what your experience with it has been. I just got off the phone with one as I'm exploring all options right now. Man is she expensive. $90/hour!! 

Please feel eel free to chime in ladies !!

MimoCa

@artemis618 That sucks big time! . I honestly miss living in Ireland where any visit was 50 euros no matter what and if you couldn't pay that they would put you on a payment plan for said 50euros!

mylittleversailles

@SP128 I honestly love it so much. I was super skeptical going in, but figured I'd give it a whirl since I was going on 10 cycles after loss with no success. My practitioner is unbelievably warm and kind. The sessions are so relaxing - I leave on a cloud and I am NOT the type of person who ever really relaxes. In addition, he reduced the amount of spotting I have before AF from 4 or 5 days to 1 or 2. I used to have severe cramping (I have 3 smallish fibroids) from ovulation to AF, increasing in severity every day and now it's minimal and I can get away with one day of ibuprofen once the flow starts. Really, it's been a saviour for me in this horrible process. I had a sore shoulder today, which he managed to work out in one session. He's extremely reassuring and always available via email to answer any questions I have, which is just not possible from a doctor. I can run my charts by him, supplement questions and even nutrition (he has additional training), if I needed.

It IS expensive. It's not covered by my insurance, but I do have a slush fund for health related expenses for up to $1000/year, which I am rapidly using up.

NYTino24

@SP128 I agree with @reneeannemm that acupuncture is great, if not for the simple fact that it is so relaxing. Sometimes it takes a little bit for them to find your trigger points, but man are they good at what they do! I stopped going for a while due to an insurance change (I'm covered, so check if you are) but have been thinking about going back.

vlagrl29

I've never tried acupuncture either but I do know some chiros do it so if you have chiro coverage it may be covered.  I had no idea it could shorten your pre AF spotting.  I always have that @reneeannemm - how does that work?

mylittleversailles

@vlagrl29 Acupuncture is supposed to be able to balance your hormones; in my case there was a possibility I had low-ish progesterone. There's very little research to back up most of the industry's claims, but the only reason I gave it a shot is there was some very promising study done into its effectiveness for fertility. If this is merely a placebo, I'll take it because I am tired of suffering alone.

Be careful and make sure your practitioner is well trained and specializes in fertility, though.

SP128

@NYTino24 @reneeannemm thanks so much. I think I'm going to look into it some more. I'm more confident in it now since I feel like I "know" someone that have done it. I may need to look for a place closer than the one I contacted last night. She only has off street meteor parking. I don't need to add parallel parking to one of my stressors. Also, her hours aren't great. 

Going to call my insurance company. Pretty sure I need to submit a receipt and they will reimburse up to $150. That's so little but better than nothing 

vlagrl29

that might be something I consider if we make it to the year mark.  I'm all happy this morning because I saw creamy CM lol - I am pretty sure now AF will come next week sometime.  

artemis618

@SP128 FYI, the American Board of Oriental Reproductive Medicine (ABORM) has a member directory of acupuncturists that focus on infertility:  
https://www.aborm.org/

I found my unicorn practitioner cross-referencing between my insurance provider directory web site and the ABORM provider directory (and she was like 2 miles away from my house!), only to contact her to learn that she is moving to New Mexico...

I've mostly used acupuncture to calm down and relax, for low mood/energy in the past, but my old acupuncturist (who was also a chiro) left town last June (the last time I saw her was two days before my wedding).  I've been lucky that my insurance with my last couple of jobs has covered it (well 20 sessions/year), but the rates they charge can vary a lot.  My last one charged $50/session cash rate (basically what she got after insurance knocked her billing down), while the lady I just found (also a non-practicing DC) charges $125 (but after I hit my kinda high deductible I will only be responsible for 10%).

NYTino24

I'm going for acupuncture on Saturday. I can't wait to just relax!! 

vlagrl29

the week after my loss I spent the entire day at the spa -  you guys should try yoga - it's very relaxing.

artemis618

I picked up these people's fertility yoga DVD from Amazon (apparently also available as Vimeo stream) last month, but didn't get around to breaking it out till this week:  https://lotuscenter.com/fertility.html  It's not like a normal yoga flow, but I figured it couldn't hurt even if just another thing to do to make me feel like I'm being proactive/doing something.  The one exception is maybe while stimming for IVF (which I am now) - I emailed the guy since the url provided on the dvd didn't work, and he responded in a couple of hours. (I sort of thought all the twists with oversized ovaries might not be the best idea). Not sure if that would be of interest to anyone.  I have acu appointments scheduled for tomorrow and Tuesday - looking forward to them!

vlagrl29

@artemis618- interesting.  I watched the trailer.  No its not your normal yoga flow.  I already do a lot of those poses plus many more and have been practicing yoga for almost 4 years.  It is life changing at least for me it was.

I'm just not willing to try all these extra things - I did OPKs thinking that would work same for preseed, Maca Root, temping and charting.  If it is going to happen for us it will.  Getting P checked next month and if its low I will look into suppositories otherwise I'm just leaving it up to god.

artemis618

@vlagrl29 No, it's definitely not a substitute for a typical yoga class, but it's supposed to be more aligned with fertility-related Eastern medicine concepts.  I've been reluctantly practicing for yoga (mostly Vinyasa - not a fan of Ashtanga, Bikram, Hatha, but love restorative) for about 14 years.  I think it's a requirement to live in Santa Monica - that and driving a hybrid . (I hate to admit that I'm currently on my second hybrid.)

Good for you being able to let go - it's not easy.

vlagrl29

@artemis618 - nope not easy at all but its much better for my mental state.

I like doing a combination of yoga - vinyasa, ashtanga primary series, and arm balance.  I'm a huge fan of arm balance and inversions.  

SP128

Just got another bill for the copay the day the mc was confirmed. Wtf? Seriously 3 months later they send me a bill ? Mind you I paid another copay bill when I went to confirm the mc was complete. Grrrr

vlagrl29

oh that sucks @SP128 -  I've only gotten back lab bills since I only had a CP.  I did have a follow up with my OB which I haven't gotten yet for that.

BelhurstBride

Introducing myself to the board, 

I'm here after a MMC at 16 weeks on 1/4, assumingely related to the SCH I dx with at 7w. I had a D&C the following day. My follow up appointment is 2/2 and anxious to hear what the future may hold for us. 

I'm a SAHM but coach age group swimming. We're entering championship season, so at least I've had that to keep my busier as I wait for my drs appointment and AF to return. 

NYTino24

@BelhurstBride My heart breaks for you! Hope your follow up goes well.

Mack2342

@BelhurstBride. So sorry for your loss.  Take care of yourself 

SP128

@BelhurstBride  I'm sorry you find yourself here.  Hugs

splashmountain

@BelhurstBride I'm sorry for your loss

jen83mn

@BelhurstBride

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you hugs!

Uhlease13

I'm so sorry @BelhurstBride hugs 

jen83mn

@BelhurstBride

I am so sorry for your loss. Sending you hugs!