Not sure if I miss pregnancy!! I like having my body back even if it is sleep deprived. I love my little gremlin but I could use a break too. She seems to have "woken up" the last couple of days and I have no idea what to do with her. She still doesn't get games or books but I did get her to play with a rattle yesterday.
Me: 38, DH: 36 Married Jan 2008 DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18" so in love Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
I have a weird urge to make bread. I've made bread like once or twice before - but for some reason I really want to get into it during the rest of my maternity leave.
@leksiL totally - I have no idea what to do with Max sometimes either. I feel like I'm a boring mom already, haha!
Here are my randoms:
The days go by SO FAST, it's startling sometines. I suppose the fact it gets dark so early doesn't help, but I feel like this past month has been a total blur.
I miss making dinner and cleaning my house.
Usually while doing my day to day stuff around the house, I listen to either Howard Stern or crime podcasts. Even though Max is still so young, and I'm sure it doesn't really matter that he hears that stuff, I still feel super guilty, like that filth will already start to absorb into his little brain.
So... this week DS1 came home from school and started telling me that he and Daddy do boy things like sports and girls do girl things. I was like..... HOLD UP! No. H kind of played into it, which annoyed he hell out of me. This is the first time I've had to address gender roles other than boys have a penis and girls don't. I later explained to H that I want to nip that crap in the bud and all my reasons why. It made me sad that at the innocence of three and a half I have to explain that boys and girls are equal and either can do ANYTHING. I sure as shit know he's not getting that message at home... how do you/will you handle this kind of thing with your own children?
I have a weird urge to make bread. I've made bread like once or twice before - but for some reason I really want to get into it during the rest of my maternity leave.
I had the same thought when I woke up this morning.
@difazette - same way you are. And by being a girl that does sports, math, engineering, and itches her balls. Okay maybe not the last one. With the younger sister component I also plan to make sure they are totally treated equally - not that they have to enjoy the same hobbies but in my household growing up it was always my dad and brother going to do things like fly toy planes and I was stuck having to go to the mall. I hated the mall. But it was just assumed that toy planes were a boy thing. I have the added challenge of mama bear pouncing on it when the grandparents inevitably make those assumptions with these two. I've already seen my parents do it with my cousin's kids - paper dolls for the girls, paper airplanes for the boy (okay my dad is a pilot so there are a lot of airplanes).
I've just decided I will speak up and confront it every. time. No letting things slip because I don't want to make a deal. I also won't get emotional over it but just even keeled hard stop that no one pushes (which is my specialty).
@DiFazette - I totally agree. We model equality at home and I emphasize it as much as possible. For example - when my parents were here a couple weeks ago, DS liked a necklace I was given and said he wanted one; my mom replied "oh no sweetie, necklaces are for girls". I immediately stopped what I was doing, turned around and said "actually babe, anybody can wear a necklace". My mom said, "oh, Jacob, necklaces are just for girls though, really". I Again stopped what I was doing, forced her to make eye contact with me and said "actually mom, lots of guys wear necklaces and if Jacob wants to wear one, at any point, he can. I do not believe that there are things that are just for boys and just for girls and I refuse to have that message given to my children". To say that she was displeased is an understatement but I have no problem confronting my parents or anyone else.
@DiFazette I've been worried about the gender roles thing too, although my parents did a pretty good job with me in that dept so we have something to model against. DH and I do most things 50/50 so seeing mommy working with tools alongside daddy (vice versa w/cooking) and things like that will help. We also have a lot of handmedowns from my nephews, but will absolutely have some "girly" clothes in there as well, and we will let her choose what to wear. My mom tried to force me to only wear overalls when I was a kid and all I wanted to wear were patent leather shoes and dresses, and then my stepmom tried to get me to wear dresses when I was 9ish and all I wanted to wear were overalls and baggy "boy" clothes. So I'm just going to let her be herself.
I WILL teach her about MATCHING though. My mom never taught that to me and I never matched at all until 6th grade when another girl took pity on me. I'm also going to teach her to walk in a straight line, which my grandmother taught to me as ladylike. I secretly judge people that don't walk with their toes forward even today (I know that is really silly/mean, but I'm not perfect!)
Me: 38, DH: 36 Married Jan 2008 DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18" so in love Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
I just realized my out of control sugar cravings have nothing to do with breastfeeding, and everything to do with sleep deprivation. I guess I better learn how to nap before I gain back all the pregnancy weight!
@DiFazette I am all about helping my kids break the gender norms. Boys and girls can both do anything. DD1 was obsessed with lightning McQueen when she was little, so she carried little cars with her everywhere! It drives me nuts when boys or girls genderize things. It drives me nuts how toys all come in 'girl' colors as well as normal colors. There were no 'girl' tinker toys when we were kids, there were just tinker toys- for everyone. Or logos, for everyone. Anyways, end rant.
So today was a big deal, I bought my very first, ever, new car. We have been planning to replace my old one as it almost has 200,000 miles on it. We have been researching and comparing for months. So we go to Trader Joe's right afterwards since we are in the neighborhood, a special treat. We get out of TJ's, and someone had let their shopping cart smash right into the front of my brand new, 5 miles on it, never even been home, car. damnit.
After his last diaper change, DS had a few minutes of skin to skin with me. I heard him sucking and assumed he found his fingers. Nope, he gave himself a hickey on his forearm...
@yellingbanana love tit in solidarity! I had something similar when i got my car a few years ago. First day driving it into work, a rock shot up and cracked the windshield
Thanks guys @ea301 it must be some kind of new car karma, I'm going to have to be careful! I had my kids with me and had a fleeting moment of almost losing my cool. But I managed to not cuss in front of them and play it off with a lesson of putting carts away/not being a jerk.
@karmba I just want you to know that made me feel much better! Lol, how cute!
I seriously wonder how long LO would sleep for if we let him. I tried waiting him out last night and had to wake him after 4 hours to feed. Since he's still below birth weight, I'm scared to let him go too long. But I sure hope he keeps up these long stretches once he's allowed to sleep that long.
1. White noise is like Xanax to this LO. Seriously. DD and DS1 liked it, but 95% of the time if Parker is upset, a nice loud fan or the white noise app on my phone will almost instantly calm him. It's almost a little eerie how quickly he responds to it.
2. The 5% of the time white noise isn't magical is if he is in the car seat. He HATES the car seat/car. Screams hysterically no matter what I do. Every time. No matter how long he's in it. I feel kind of trapped at home bc I hate listening to him cry frantically every time we go somewhere.
Well, we had my brother's memorial service today. Thankfully, due to the weather, DH's work closed so he was able to drive us there. It was a beautiful celebration of his life, and the Pastor did a great job of throwing in moments of laughter to break up the times of sadness when appropriate. I was able to have my closure, and smiled when hearing others stories and memories of my brother. Thank you ladies for your thoughts and condolences throughout this past week.
@BabyRobbinsAdventure mine hates hats too. Hoods are ok, but hats are evil. So are mittens and socks.
Spent the night at our friends house last night because she offered to watch DS so DH and I could get some sleep. This kid slept from 2am until 7! After he kept us up all night the other night he slept through. Woke up and ate a little, then fell right back asleep. He's still sleeping. This kid is making a liar out of me...
Married 4/12/13 TTC since 6/13 Diagnosed w/ PCOS 4/9/15 - R/E recommended lifestyle change BFP 4/10/16 - DS born 12/16/2016 SURPRISE! BFP 3/8/18
I hadn't really been tracking Max's sleep, but I decided to yesterday. By 7 PM, he only had 8 hours of sleep since midnight. Good lord. So we did some reading about how much sleep he should get, and how to get him back on track. We decided to put him down around 7:30 last night, and he started crying of course. He cries all the time because he's so tired, I feel so bad. Anyway, he cried it out for about 10 minutes, and then he slept for 4 hours (!!!). Woke up, fed him, he slept for another 4 hours! So stoked. So far this morning (it's currently 8:41) he's on his 2nd nap after waking up from "nighttime sleep".
I didn't realize that at one month old, they shouldn't be awake for more than 1-1.5 hours before getting another nap (at least that's what a lot of Google searching told me). I feel terrible. Anyway, I'm hoping that I'll have a more rested baby soon.
Anyone else dealing with an overtired baby? Any tips for getting back on track?
My big kids come home tomorrow (they've been with my mom and dad since last Sunday). I'm feeling fairly anxious (overwhelmed) about this adjustment back to "normal" and a bit weepy today ... But I also miss them all terribly. All that, I don't anticipate being on here much for a while as we find our new normal. I'll try to remember to put up the PP Healing thread... hugs to you all!
@maamawaabangi totally understandable. Godspeed to you! Sending some prayers that you guys are able to get into a good flow and that it won't be nearly as overwhelming as you might be anticipating. You've totally got this❤
I hadn't really been tracking Max's sleep, but I decided to yesterday. By 7 PM, he only had 8 hours of sleep since midnight. Good lord. So we did some reading about how much sleep he should get, and how to get him back on track. We decided to put him down around 7:30 last night, and he started crying of course. He cries all the time because he's so tired, I feel so bad. Anyway, he cried it out for about 10 minutes, and then he slept for 4 hours (!!!). Woke up, fed him, he slept for another 4 hours! So stoked. So far this morning (it's currently 8:41) he's on his 2nd nap after waking up from "nighttime sleep".
I didn't realize that at one month old, they shouldn't be awake for more than 1-1.5 hours before getting another nap (at least that's what a lot of Google searching told me). I feel terrible. Anyway, I'm hoping that I'll have a more rested baby soon.
Anyone else dealing with an overtired baby? Any tips for getting back on track?
Lurking from Oct 16. I was dealing with the same and didn't realize wake time was so short. My almost 3 month old still only stays awake for an hour. After she wakes in the morning I just watch for her sleep cues like yawning and rubbing eyes and then I swaddle her, give her the paci and she almost goes asleep on her own. Sometimes I do have to hold her for a minute to get her drowsy. Unfortunately she only takes 30 min naps though. When she wakes the cycle repeats. The key is not waiting too long after LO gives sleep cues to put them down.
@Lisa3379 I second the watching cues for drowsiness. I love the book Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child (HSHHC). He talks about newborns being awake no longer than two hours max no matter what time of day or night. Watching for signs of sleepiness is key and starting to soothe them to sleep (however works best for your LO) as soon as you see that to avoid overtiredness. When I see DS2 yawn, start having droopy eyelids, or jerking his arms around and fussing, I swaddle him within minutes, put the paci in and white noise on. Usually he goes to sleep fairly quickly.
This is a random. We have a super cute levtex brand mobile. It plays like two or three lines of nursery songs (which is expected) well today when I turned it on it was playing Christmas songs... wtf? Then it went back to the same old nursery songs after a bit.
@maamawaabangi oh no! Mine is fighting something viral so I totally get it. We've been sanitizing and washing everything. FX the sickie germs get out of both of our houses and stay away from the babies!
Got the official diagnoses of PTSD & PPD today. It's weird. There is relief, but then there is fear and so many different emotions. Therapist requested DH to come to the next session because she is concerned with some suicidal ideation I've had without recognizing it as such. She's a wonderful therapist and I'm happy to be her patient. The good news is that she thinks we caught it early enough that it doesn't turn into something potentially worse (PPP), and expects me to make a full recovery from it in 3-6 months.
The PTSD will take longer, but at least I won't have the terrifying thoughts I've been having anymore, although I may still struggle with the nightmares and flashbacks. I think DH needs counseling too. We discussed it and he is doing a lot better than me, but also needs help processing.
It's funny because if you looked at my Instagram, I don't seem troubled. But it's not really funny at all.
kattyc-2
member
Re: January Randoms
Also, I miss pregnancy. Now I have this fragile tiny human totally dependent on me and no clue what I'm doing
Married Jan 2008
DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18"
Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
Here are my randoms:
The days go by SO FAST, it's startling sometines. I suppose the fact it gets dark so early doesn't help, but I feel like this past month has been a total blur.
I miss making dinner and cleaning my house.
Usually while doing my day to day stuff around the house, I listen to either Howard Stern or crime podcasts. Even though Max is still so young, and I'm sure it doesn't really matter that he hears that stuff, I still feel super guilty, like that filth will already start to absorb into his little brain.
I've just decided I will speak up and confront it every. time. No letting things slip because I don't want to make a deal. I also won't get emotional over it but just even keeled hard stop that no one pushes (which is my specialty).
I WILL teach her about MATCHING though. My mom never taught that to me and I never matched at all until 6th grade when another girl took pity on me. I'm also going to teach her to walk in a straight line, which my grandmother taught to me as ladylike. I secretly judge people that don't walk with their toes forward even today (I know that is really silly/mean, but I'm not perfect!)
Married Jan 2008
DD Baby Bells born Dec 2016 5 lbs, 12 oz, 18"
Due with #2 Baby Arya EDD February 2020
My Wedding Bio!
So we go to Trader Joe's right afterwards since we are in the neighborhood, a special treat. We get out of TJ's, and someone had let their shopping cart smash right into the front of my brand new, 5 miles on it, never even been home, car.
TTC #1 January 2016
BFP April 18 2016 | EDD December 29, 2016
Welcome baby A! January 9, 2017
TTC#2 March 2018
BFP March 30, 2018 | EDD December 12, 2018
@ea301 it must be some kind of new car karma, I'm going to have to be careful!
I had my kids with me and had a fleeting moment of almost losing my cool. But I managed to not cuss in front of them and play it off with a lesson of putting carts away/not being a jerk.
@karmba
2. The 5% of the time white noise isn't magical is if he is in the car seat. He HATES the car seat/car. Screams hysterically no matter what I do. Every time. No matter how long he's in it. I feel kind of trapped at home bc I hate listening to him cry frantically every time we go somewhere.
Anyone else have this issue?
hugs*
Spent the night at our friends house last night because she offered to watch DS so DH and I could get some sleep. This kid slept from 2am until 7! After he kept us up all night the other night he slept through. Woke up and ate a little, then fell right back asleep. He's still sleeping. This kid is making a liar out of me...
TTC since 6/13
Diagnosed w/ PCOS 4/9/15 - R/E recommended lifestyle change
BFP 4/10/16 - DS born 12/16/2016
SURPRISE! BFP 3/8/18
I hadn't really been tracking Max's sleep, but I decided to yesterday. By 7 PM, he only had 8 hours of sleep since midnight. Good lord. So we did some reading about how much sleep he should get, and how to get him back on track. We decided to put him down around 7:30 last night, and he started crying of course. He cries all the time because he's so tired, I feel so bad. Anyway, he cried it out for about 10 minutes, and then he slept for 4 hours (!!!). Woke up, fed him, he slept for another 4 hours! So stoked. So far this morning (it's currently 8:41) he's on his 2nd nap after waking up from "nighttime sleep".
Due December 27th with baby #7
We have a super cute levtex brand mobile. It plays like two or three lines of nursery songs (which is expected) well today when I turned it on it was playing Christmas songs... wtf? Then it went back to the same old nursery songs after a bit.
So weird.
So... that's a bummer!
Due December 27th with baby #7
The PTSD will take longer, but at least I won't have the terrifying thoughts I've been having anymore, although I may still struggle with the nightmares and flashbacks. I think DH needs counseling too. We discussed it and he is doing a lot better than me, but also needs help processing.
It's funny because if you looked at my Instagram, I don't seem troubled. But it's not really funny at all.