June 2016 Moms

Postpartum Depression

2

Re: Postpartum Depression

  • Doing ok.  Preston still is having that weird early morning wakeup super cranky and crying for the boob.  DH is willing to try and coach him down the next few days to see if it's a sleep training issue.  If I can't handle that then I'm just gonna surrender myself to the time cause I'd rather him wake up ready for the day happy at 7am than super cranky at 5:30-6.
    khenry12
  • Doing ok.  Preston still is having that weird early morning wakeup super cranky and crying for the boob.  DH is willing to try and coach him down the next few days to see if it's a sleep training issue.  If I can't handle that then I'm just gonna surrender myself to the time cause I'd rather him wake up ready for the day happy at 7am than super cranky at 5:30-6.
    Idk what your feeding schedule is currently, but I found that by trying to cram all of Jackie's feedings into the daytime, she dropped her other night feedings automatically because she was getting all her calories during the day. Maybe try to squeeze an extra feeding in before bed and see if that doesn't help him last a little longer.
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
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  • He a food addict. Lol he breastfeeds every 2-3 hours and we stuff him with a 6oz bottle before bed and has 3 full solid meals a day.  I think it's a behavioral thing right now.
  • He a food addict. Lol he breastfeeds every 2-3 hours and we stuff him with a 6oz bottle before bed and has 3 full solid meals a day.  I think it's a behavioral thing right now.
    Hmmm... well that's certainly not the issue then. Haha.
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
  • How's everything going @adiaz132003?
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
  • We are taking it one day at a time.  We've had some harder moments but I think I'm doing well.  Therapy is really helping a lot.
    Glad that therapy seems to be working! DH has found therapy to be very helpful as well with his anxiety and depression. He also finds going for walks outside and meditation very helpful.

    Since you always have someone at home with you would you be able to go for a walk to try to clear your head? Or take 20 minutes to meditate each day? I know it seems silly but it really did help my husband tremendously. He's actually off of Prozac now because he changed his sleeping, eating, exercise habits and really worked on changing his work/life balance.

    I know obviously PPD is different than depression and anxiety, but maybe it can help you too! :)
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
  • Not sure if it's postpartum blues/ depression, regular depression, or just exhaustion, but I had a crying spell today. It's been a while since I've had one, i just feel like this house is never going to be home, it's just one big list of things we need to do that I feel like I'll never have time to do. I flipped on my husband about it so he's pissed off at me now.

    Does anyone else feel like they have nothing to look forward to? I feel like i work all week and miss my daughter, and my weekend is full of trying to get a million things done while trying to spend all my time with her so I'm not very successful, and then i go back to work again : (
  • @lizbeth86 I understand the house thing, we always have something that needs to be finished or started with our house. It's a ongoing project that feels like it never be how we want it. My husband works during the week and wants to work on the house but also do family activities. Our solution is that we only do work one day and if you have everything set aside the night before along with a plan you actually can accomplish something. We might not finish the project but at least we made progress. I remember how hard it was when I was working and it takes time to find a groove. Maybe if you don't try to commit the whole weekend to house projects you'll be able to have something to look forward to every weekend. I hope that helps a bit.
    Lizbeth86
  • I always feel hopeless when it comes to the house.  It always caused me so much stress.  
  • Our home is so-so when it comes to being clean. I do little bits of cleaning here and there throughout the week so it isn't too terrible. That still doesn't stop my husband from coming home from work and saying, "This place is a sty!"  :#
  • I always feel hopeless when it comes to the house.  It always caused me so much stress.  
    You and me both. I work as a teacher and then a night instructor at the university so Mondays and Wed I get home about 8pm. Then I have to wash bottles, prepare my LO's daycare bag and make lunch for tomorrow. I don't get around to cleaning much.
    My husband? Gets home after 4 or 5 and lays down to play PS4 all night.
  • I have been feeling overwhelmed about the house too. We are getting ready to re do our kitchen, so things are even more of a mess than usual.

    i had my first anxiety attack in years yesterday. I got them after my second baby, and this just reminded me so much of that time when I was consumed by anxiety. It scared me to death. Trying my very best to shake off the anxiety this week and overcome it before it gets bad. 
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  • Ugh wonder weeks kill me.  Every time he goes through one I feel so broken.  The crying is a trigger and now he's standing which adds stress cause I'm worried about him hitting his face/head which he did today.  My therapist says when I feel stressed to ride it out but distract my mind from the thing causeoling the stress rather than try and problem solve but it's so hard.  When I feel the stress coming it's like a pit I. My stomach and I just want it to go away.
  • Ugh wonder weeks kill me.  Every time he goes through one I feel so broken.  The crying is a trigger and now he's standing which adds stress cause I'm worried about him hitting his face/head which he did today.  My therapist says when I feel stressed to ride it out but distract my mind from the thing causeoling the stress rather than try and problem solve but it's so hard.  When I feel the stress coming it's like a pit I. My stomach and I just want it to go away.
    Would a crib rail cover help? I'm thinking of buying one in case Damien starts doing that too.

    When Damien was in his colic phase, I absolutely dreaded his crying. It became a "you cry, I cry" situation because I felt so helpless and like a failure at times. I started periodically used my mp3 player to muffle the crying a bit when he would start up. It lightened the mood a bit and helped me cope better, I had something to sing to him and dance with him to. It also gave me a little distraction if I needed it. I could still hear him and comfort him but I wasn't as overwhelmed since it wasn't as loud. Might not really be helpful in this particular instance since you are trying to grt Preston to sleep. 

    (Random internet pic, but saw the rail cover and thought it looked interesting.)

  • So idk if it was because I was out in the hospital again and sick or what, but today I feel so low.  I feel super tired and just want to sleep all day and night and I get feelings of dread I. My stomach so any fussing from Preston hits me harder.  I also have been feeling super ugly lately cause I am overdue for a haircut and my normally groomed brows have fully grown in like a couple of dirty catapilars. I'm embarrassed to leave my house and run into people I know.  To top it all off. Preston's second tooth is coming in and even though he was fine all day it chose bedtime to bother him and he just wanted to cuddle.  It took me Tylenol and 45 min to finally get him to fall asleep. Honestly, if it weren't for the fact that I have to sleep in a certain position, I'd just have him in bed with me. It's so much easier to get him to fall asleep when we cuddle.  Ugh
  • So idk if it was because I was out in the hospital again and sick or what, but today I feel so low.  I feel super tired and just want to sleep all day and night and I get feelings of dread I. My stomach so any fussing from Preston hits me harder.  I also have been feeling super ugly lately cause I am overdue for a haircut and my normally groomed brows have fully grown in like a couple of dirty catapilars. I'm embarrassed to leave my house and run into people I know.  To top it all off. Preston's second tooth is coming in and even though he was fine all day it chose bedtime to bother him and he just wanted to cuddle.  It took me Tylenol and 45 min to finally get him to fall asleep. Honestly, if it weren't for the fact that I have to sleep in a certain position, I'd just have him in bed with me. It's so much easier to get him to fall asleep when we cuddle.  Ugh
    I'm sorry you are having a rough week! I completely sympathize, we have been sick here too, my little girls always ask me when I will feel better so I will be in a better mood. Spring is around the bend and the fresh air and outdoors will help you renew your vigor. Btw, I haven't had my eyebrows done in 3 1/2 years and they are heinous lol!!!
  • So my dose of Zoloft has to go up.  I was really putting that off but I should have known it had to happen eventually.  It was half of a starting dose and I am still miserable and on top of it all Preston has a cold so he will be up all night every night until the runny nose stops.  Thankfully it's already thickening up even though it's only day one.  Normally he has a yucky running nose for like 4 days then it thickens up for like 2 days then it's the clean out phase.  I'm hoping that means this will be a super short cold like the ones DH and I just got over.  Only lasted 3 days for us.
  • rlbrooks84rlbrooks84 member
    edited March 2017
    Sorry its never fun having to up your meds but it sucks more to be depressed.  I hope Preston gets over the cold quickly, it's so rough when they get sick but it does get a little easier as they get older.
  • So my dose of Zoloft has to go up.  I was really putting that off but I should have known it had to happen eventually.  It was half of a starting dose and I am still miserable and on top of it all Preston has a cold so he will be up all night every night until the runny nose stops.  Thankfully it's already thickening up even though it's only day one.  Normally he has a yucky running nose for like 4 days then it thickens up for like 2 days then it's the clean out phase.  I'm hoping that means this will be a super short cold like the ones DH and I just got over.  Only lasted 3 days for us.
    Med adjustments are never fun, buthopefully it will get you feeling better. Sick babies are always tough too, fingers crossed his cold doesn't last too long!
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
  • I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety recently. I think a big part of it is the looking trip to Paris in May. I am constantly feeling like I'm not doing a good enough job at being a mom. I've been feeling so overwhelmed that it's really making it hard to be my best self.

    I am constantly comparing myself to what I think other mom's are doing, and making myself feel like a failure. Am I doing everything organic? Is our bedtime routine good enough? Am I reading to her enough? Are her toys educational enough? Etc.

    Anyone else?

    I guess I should add that I started therapy last week to deal it and am hoping that it helps.


    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
    Tawny87rlbrooks84
  • I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety recently. I think a big part of it is the looking trip to Paris in May. I am constantly feeling like I'm not doing a good enough job at being a mom. I've been feeling so overwhelmed that it's really making it hard to be my best self.

    I am constantly comparing myself to what I think other mom's are doing, and making myself feel like a failure. Am I doing everything organic? Is our bedtime routine good enough? Am I reading to her enough? Are her toys educational enough? Etc.

    Anyone else?

    I guess I should add that I started therapy last week to deal it and am hoping that it helps.


    I understand. And I'm sorry your dealing with that!

    My anxiety has been terrible lately too. I've been obsessing over if it's my fault that my five year old is still struggling with reading, or that my almost three year old can only count to 10 and only knows her uppercase letters, and totally a mess about the baby not getting enough attention (even though she's healthy and happy as a clam). Stuff that is all probably perfectly normal, but I get panicky about it.  I've been comparing my messy home to friends sparkling clean ones, and other dumb stuff like that. 

    Anxiety can take over so quickly. I told dh this morning that my goal for the day is to not get overwhelmed. Sounds simple, but not so easy some days! 

    I hope the therapy helps. Let us know how you're doing! 
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  • I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety recently. I think a big part of it is the looking trip to Paris in May. I am constantly feeling like I'm not doing a good enough job at being a mom. I've been feeling so overwhelmed that it's really making it hard to be my best self.

    I am constantly comparing myself to what I think other mom's are doing, and making myself feel like a failure. Am I doing everything organic? Is our bedtime routine good enough? Am I reading to her enough? Are her toys educational enough? Etc.

    Anyone else?

    I guess I should add that I started therapy last week to deal it and am hoping that it helps.


    I understand. And I'm sorry your dealing with that!

    My anxiety has been terrible lately too. I've been obsessing over if it's my fault that my five year old is still struggling with reading, or that my almost three year old can only count to 10 and only knows her uppercase letters, and totally a mess about the baby not getting enough attention (even though she's healthy and happy as a clam). Stuff that is all probably perfectly normal, but I get panicky about it.  I've been comparing my messy home to friends sparkling clean ones, and other dumb stuff like that. 

    Anxiety can take over so quickly. I told dh this morning that my goal for the day is to not get overwhelmed. Sounds simple, but not so easy some days! 

    I hope the therapy helps. Let us know how you're doing! 
    I've been dealing with a lot of anxiety recently. I think a big part of it is the looking trip to Paris in May. I am constantly feeling like I'm not doing a good enough job at being a mom. I've been feeling so overwhelmed that it's really making it hard to be my best self.

    I am constantly comparing myself to what I think other mom's are doing, and making myself feel like a failure. Am I doing everything organic? Is our bedtime routine good enough? Am I reading to her enough? Are her toys educational enough? Etc.

    Anyone else?

    I guess I should add that I started therapy last week to deal it and am hoping that it helps.


    I understand. And I'm sorry your dealing with that!

    My anxiety has been terrible lately too. I've been obsessing over if it's my fault that my five year old is still struggling with reading, or that my almost three year old can only count to 10 and only knows her uppercase letters, and totally a mess about the baby not getting enough attention (even though she's healthy and happy as a clam). Stuff that is all probably perfectly normal, but I get panicky about it.  I've been comparing my messy home to friends sparkling clean ones, and other dumb stuff like that. 

    Anxiety can take over so quickly. I told dh this morning that my goal for the day is to not get overwhelmed. Sounds simple, but not so easy some days! 

    I hope the therapy helps. Let us know how you're doing! 
     Yes about the clean house! My sisters house always looks great and mine is a mess. (I always need to remind myself that she has a cleaning lady once a week).

    Ive never been an anxious person so this is all very new to me, and I hate it!

    My therapist said it's all about reworking the way that you think, but man is it hard!

    Sometimes i feel like I'm just a kid pretending to be an adult, it's hard to explain. 

    I'm hoping that therapy really helps because I want to be the best mom possible for Savannah
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
  • Lizbeth86Lizbeth86 member
    edited April 2017
    @laurenm2123 I wouldn't say I have the same anxiety, but I'm sure you are doing a great job as a mom!

    I have to read about what we should be doing as parents in small doses, to balance being educated with feeling guilt overload. I work full time and no one can score an A+ in everything. Our LO gets an overload of love bc my husband and mom watch her, but they follow instinct more than reading a lot, and there is only so much time in the day for me to keep up with her stages. Plus I think you can only focus on one or two things at a time, before mom guilt overwhelms you. I say, if you're feeling anxious, turn off the internet and kiss and enjoy your baby : )
    lm45678
  • Lizbeth86 said:
    @laurenm2123 I wouldn't say I have the same anxiety, but I'm sure you are doing a great job as a mom!

    I have to read about what we should be doing as parents in small doses, to balance being educated with feeling guilt overload. I work full time and no one can score an A+ in everything. Our LO gets an overload of love bc my husband and mom watch her, but they follow instinct more than reading a lot, and there is only so much time in the day for me to keep up with her stages. Plus I think you can only focus on one or two things at a time, before mom guilt overwhelms you. I say, if you're feeling anxious, turn off the internet and kiss and enjoy your baby : )
    That's the one thing I keep reminding myself that while I'm not perfect, my little girl is so loved! She is the happiest baby and seriously gets so much love and affection from me and DH. If there is one thing I'm doing right it is loving, hugging and kissing Savannah like crazy and TBH I think that's the most important! 
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
    Lizbeth86artlea2013
  • Ugh I hear ya.  I have been so much better lately but still having issues with the clean house and how I'm not really taking care of myself.  The Zoloft and therapy has really helped me a ton 
    lm45678meggyme
  • I think a part of it is social media TBH because everyone only puts their best self online. I took the app off my phone to see if it helps. I'm hoping it will help me realize that I am a good mom and stop comparing myself to others. I'm sure it's something we're all guilty off from time to time!

    We shall see!
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
    Tawny87rlbrooks8426pointrunningfor2
  • I think a part of it is social media TBH because everyone only puts their best self online. I took the app off my phone to see if it helps. I'm hoping it will help me realize that I am a good mom and stop comparing myself to others. I'm sure it's something we're all guilty off from time to time!

    We shall see!
    I hope that helps. Whenever I feel overwhelmed or like a bad mom, I try to remind myself that every parent to some extent is making it up as they go along. It makes me feel better about making decisions and possible mistakes.
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
  • It's funny you're talking about this and the article from the bump today was "Why Real-Life Motherhood Looks Nothing Like Your Instagram Feed"

    https://www.thebump.com/a/instagram-vs-real-life-motherhood?utm_source=thebump.com&utm_medium=email&utm_term=parenting-newsletter&utm_campaign=parenting-newsletter

    lm45678adiaz132003
  • Lizbeth86 said:
    It's funny you're talking about this and the article from the bump today was "Why Real-Life Motherhood Looks Nothing Like Your Instagram Feed"

    https://www.thebump.com/a/instagram-vs-real-life-motherhood?utm_source=thebump.com&utm_medium=email&utm_term=parenting-newsletter&utm_campaign=parenting-newsletter

    What a great article!
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
  • I know this is crazy but I can't help but blame myself for all the misery and pain Damien is going through these past 3 weeks. If I hadn't gone back to work, he wouldn't be going through all of this. As of Friday he was still battling a fever, but it seemed to disappear over the weekend. He still isn't eating much by way of solids, a few bites here and there, and getting him to drink a bottle of milk is a nightmare. I'm lucky if he gets a few oz before stopping and wailing. In the past day or so, he's also started writhing about as he screams and cries, like he is in pain but I'm at a loss for what could be causing it. He screams every time we take him into the nursery, which breaks my heart and he screams if he is laid down (he now has to be laid on his stomach). In general he is just such an unhappy baby and it is killing me. Maybe once a day we get a glimmer of his old self but it never lasts long. I'm so sick of taking him to the clinic and being met with shrugs and, "This is good for his immune system," and, "Get ready, you'll be here a lot." I'm worried that we're missing something, that something is really wrong but then I feel crazy for even thinking that since all the doctors just seem to think he'll get over whatever it is. 
  • I'm so sorry mama! It sucks now, but the illnesses he catches now he'll have immunity to later. Try to think of all that working allows you to provide him: a great example of what a woman is capable of, socialization at daycare, the opportunity to realize that you are more than just his mom. All this in addition to the money you bring home to provide him with a good life and your family financial security. You are not abandoning him when you go to work, you are providing for him. And eventually he won't get sick as much. You're doing your best for your family, don't talk yourself out of that.
    DD1: June '16 DD2: March ‘19 :::: Married since 2011 :::: USN Wife ::::
    laurendiaz02artlea2013rlbrooks84lm45678
  • I'm so sorry.  I know that guilty feeling.  Did they take a listen to his tummy to see if maybe that's bugging him?  Preston acts like this when he has a belly ache.  
  • meggyme said:
    I'm so sorry mama! It sucks now, but the illnesses he catches now he'll have immunity to later. Try to think of all that working allows you to provide him: a great example of what a woman is capable of, socialization at daycare, the opportunity to realize that you are more than just his mom. All this in addition to the money you bring home to provide him with a good life and your family financial security. You are not abandoning him when you go to work, you are providing for him. And eventually he won't get sick as much. You're doing your best for your family, don't talk yourself out of that.
    I love my job and had no problem going back once it was time for all the reasons you mentioned (plus I couldn't wait to have adult conversations with more people haha). Fortunately despite being sick, it does appear that Damien enjoys being at daycare. Thedaycare is a really nice place with great people. It's just hard seeing the positive side when he's been sick this long. They're definitely there, just have to remind myself about them like you said.
  • Yikes. My LO has been in daycare since two months and he wasn't THAT bad. Sure he got sick often in the beginning, but these don't last as much. Not even close. The worst was a congestion he had after we came back from california and he only just kicked it a few days ago. That was almost a month of phlegmy coughs. Something has to be going on with your LO to be sick that long.
    Tawny87
  • Yikes. My LO has been in daycare since two months and he wasn't THAT bad. Sure he got sick often in the beginning, but these don't last as much. Not even close. The worst was a congestion he had after we came back from california and he only just kicked it a few days ago. That was almost a month of phlegmy coughs. Something has to be going on with your LO to be sick that Long.

    Stuck in box!

    I agree! I think if I were in your shoes I would have them maybe run some blood tests too. Hope he is well soon!
  • I know this is crazy but I can't help but blame myself for all the misery and pain Damien is going through these past 3 weeks. If I hadn't gone back to work, he wouldn't be going through all of this. As of Friday he was still battling a fever, but it seemed to disappear over the weekend. He still isn't eating much by way of solids, a few bites here and there, and getting him to drink a bottle of milk is a nightmare. I'm lucky if he gets a few oz before stopping and wailing. In the past day or so, he's also started writhing about as he screams and cries, like he is in pain but I'm at a loss for what could be causing it. He screams every time we take him into the nursery, which breaks my heart and he screams if he is laid down (he now has to be laid on his stomach). In general he is just such an unhappy baby and it is killing me. Maybe once a day we get a glimmer of his old self but it never lasts long. I'm so sick of taking him to the clinic and being met with shrugs and, "This is good for his immune system," and, "Get ready, you'll be here a lot." I'm worried that we're missing something, that something is really wrong but then I feel crazy for even thinking that since all the doctors just seem to think he'll get over whatever it is. 
    I'm sorry you're having such a hard time- if I were you at this point I think I would demand a blood test and chest X-ray if he has had a cough for that long.

    Keep us updated! Sending creepy internet hugs your way :)
    Me (31) & DH (32)
    Married 9/27/2014
    DD Born 6/23/16
    Baby #2 Due 3/7/20
    Tawny87artlea2013rlbrooks84
  • edited April 2017
    I know this is crazy but I can't help but blame myself for all the misery and pain Damien is going through these past 3 weeks. If I hadn't gone back to work, he wouldn't be going through all of this. As of Friday he was still battling a fever, but it seemed to disappear over the weekend. He still isn't eating much by way of solids, a few bites here and there, and getting him to drink a bottle of milk is a nightmare. I'm lucky if he gets a few oz before stopping and wailing. In the past day or so, he's also started writhing about as he screams and cries, like he is in pain but I'm at a loss for what could be causing it. He screams every time we take him into the nursery, which breaks my heart and he screams if he is laid down (he now has to be laid on his stomach). In general he is just such an unhappy baby and it is killing me. Maybe once a day we get a glimmer of his old self but it never lasts long. I'm so sick of taking him to the clinic and being met with shrugs and, "This is good for his immune system," and, "Get ready, you'll be here a lot." I'm worried that we're missing something, that something is really wrong but then I feel crazy for even thinking that since all the doctors just seem to think he'll get over whatever it is. 
    I'm sorry you're having such a hard time- if I were you at this point I think I would demand a blood test and chest X-ray if he has had a cough for that long.

    Keep us updated! Sending creepy internet hugs your way :)
    He had a chest x-ray a couple of weeks ago and it was clear. Every time he goes to the doctor (and when he went to the ER one evening), they all told us he sounded clear too. It could have changed though and at this rate, I wouldn't be surprised. His cough is sounding a little bit better, at least it doesn't occur as often as it was before. I'm down for bloodwork though. My husband and I talked about requesting it and are still kinda shocked no one during our visits mentioned it. 

    Edited to add: The x-ray was a result of a follow-up in which the dr, who had seen him a few days prior, was so taken aback by how badly/quickly he was doing that she was 99% sure he had pneumonia. She told us to start antibiotics asap and not wait for the x-ray results because of how certain she was about it. Turned out not to be pneumonia but were told by her and another dr to complete the antibotics anyway. Then a 3rd dr looked at us like we were crazy when we told her he finished the antibotics, as if to say, "Why in the world did you continue if he clearly didn't have pneumonia?" Anyway, it's been a real shit-show to say the least. Even weirder is that his fever seems to go away during weekends and come right back during the weekdays when he goes to daycare. It's like we go 1 step forward and 2 steps back every week.
  • Have you noticed any differences in the colds? My kids have all gotten colds back to back before and it sucks! They did have a couple of days between colds where they were better but then the next cold hit. I'd get cranky if my ped said to get use to coming in a lot because my kid was in daycare. On a positive note maybe preschool will be easier on your LO, my boys always caught 6-7 colds the first yr of preschool. Blood test sound like a good idea to me too, I hope he gets better soon and you can have break from all this yuck!
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