when are you telling work?

mcvgal

I know there is a thread for announcing, so I'd like to keep this one for announcing at work. I want to wait until 12 weeks since I had a previous loss at 12 weeks. However, I've been having to flex out of work for several doctor appointments these last three weeks and I don't want my boss to think I'm slacking. So I'm still not sure when to tell work. When are you all telling?

SparkySunDevil

I've already told. My job requires me to be available to my customers and cashiers at all times. I was assuming this pregnancy would be like the last two, and I'd be running to the bathroom every 30 seconds. However, I haven't really been sick. But I told them, and they're aware as to my whereabouts if I do happen to disappear for a little bit. They're understanding 

slam1110

I am 8 weeks and I have also told. My boss has known we had been trying and I told her last week.  Told the rest of my co-workers this week.  I work in a small office of 8 women, and I was just ready to let it all out, lol.

Kipperoo

I'm 9 weeks and have already told my boss. Largely because we are in the process of hiring someone for my team and I was lobbying for the more expensive person with more experience so they could cover for me during maternity leave. I also figured that if I needed time off to deal with a miscarriage, I would likely explain what was going on. And the doctors appointments...I've had to leave for a few appointments already which is very uncharacteristic of me, so it made sense to say something. 

mcvgal

I'm 9 weeks right now and I only see my boss twice a week so I guess waiting a few more weeks won't be so bad.

CajunSnowWhite89

I've also told my boss already. I told him right at 6 weeks after our first u/s. We have a very friendly relationship since I'm essentially his second in command. Also, like @Kipperoo  if I have a miscarriage I know I would share it with him when I ask for time off.

However, I won't be telling any of my employees/co-managers until the same time that I announce on Facebook, which will be closer to second tri.

WombThereItIs

I'm 7 tomorrow and haven't even told our parents yet so work is a while off. I'll probably hold out until 12-16 or so but even then I'm just telling my boss to explain the frequency of days off etc, nobody else needs to know for a while longer. 

SJsMommy

Looks like I am in the minority here. I have a home office and travel for work, which leads to me very rarely seeing my boss (maybe twice a year). I experienced a late loss with my last pregnancy, so I will wait for a while yet. In fact, I do not plan to say anything until I have had my anatomy scan around the 20 week mark. 

mcvgal

@cajunsnowwhite89 that's very good idea to tell just the boss and wait to tell the others. Now I am leaning towards that option. Thanks

kat81

I don't think I'll tell work for another month or two. In theory, it shouldn't matter for them to know because I'm a professor and our contract "ends" in May (though there's a lot we need to do over the summer for tenure & promotion, so I am just SOL because of that, given that I won't get leave.) My point is that the aspects of my job that aren't just my own journey (i.e. everything but research/scholarship) are things that won't be affected by this pregnancy unless I have a rougher time than I've had in the past. To be safe I'll make the last week or two of the semester light, but I had my other two children on time more or less, so I don't anticipate there being a problem.

So no one at work NEEDS to know. But I like these people and want to tell them things about my life. So I'll probably tell them when I'm close to telling other people in my life that are at that "friend" level (i.e. a step down from close friends and family, who will get told starting pretty soon.)

My goal is to tell them before it gets really obvious in terms of the bump, but wait at least a month from now. I think we have a department meeting scheduled at the end of the semester (early December). If I haven't told them by then, I'll find a way to announce it at the meeting. If we don't have that meeting afterall, I'll just find a way to get the word out before people go on break later in December. But I'd also be ok with spilling the beans as early as a month from now.

CarmCeG

@mcvagal I will also be waiting until the end of October or possibly a week after, seeing as I do not see my boss that often. I will be about 13-14 weeks by then.

Luckily I have been able to get my appointments after work.

psherman42wwsa

I plan on waiting as long as possible.... probably until I hear people whispering about my weight gain lol.

Jellybeanqueen13

During my last pregnancy I had planned on announcing after the anatomy scan. Unfortunately, a rude woman announced it to everyone for me. She had heard from a family member and took it upon herself to tell everyone. She even lied and said she knew I was pregnant because she saw me vomiting in the bathroom (I hadn't vomited even once that pregnancy). When I got word she was spreading that story around, I immediately went to my boss and told her I was pregnant. Her response "I've heard". That experience left a bad taste in my mouth.

I'm currently a SAHM, but if I were working full-time, I would still probably try to wait, just be aware that there may be nosy, busy bodies who might find a way to rat you out.

Louise_Belcher

I have guilt about being off again for maternity leave, so I really want to put off telling them for as long as possible. Because avoiding things that are scary is always the best decision, right?!  I started showing somewhat early last time, so that may dictate when I tell. Otherwise Thanksgiving (14 weeks) or after would be great.

JonesBaby0624

I told my boss (head principal) this morning, I teach high school.  I've missed some classes for appointments, given my history and the MFM I see I will miss a lot more.  I also don't really look like myself, as I don't feel like doing my makeup and hair after I've been up hurling for 2 hours before my alarm goes off.

I won't tell my coworkers until Christmas break.  I would like to hold off telling students until at least January.

Given my history I would prefer to just make calls after the baby arrives and say..."guess what"!!

jdebaie

I've already told because I feel so sick all the time. 

Yiggle09

Because I work in radiation I told as soon as I got my BFP to make sure they pulled me from certain work areas.

MrsFox2008

I plan to tell my boss sometime this week! (I am 10 weeks today) And plan to tell co workers at 14 weeks! 

renee6465

I've been thinking about this a lot. My boss is right next door to me but I don't see her that often. I would like to wait until after my appointment on November 3rd to tell her but if it is obvious before then I will spill the beans.

oliveoil-2

I've been finding it very hard to keep my pregnancy on the DL. It's our first and since we recently got married, we get the "are you having kids soon?" question a lot. I'm 8 weeks. I told a few people I'm close with at work a few weeks ago and yesterday, I let my boss know since I've been needing some time off for doctor's appointments. She was very supportive. I work at a health center and have a female boss who is also a mom so I feel lucky because she's been there and is very understanding. I wonder if anyone is worried about how male bosses might respond to the news??   My husband has told me stories of a female coworker who had some trouble during her pregnancy and maternity leave from superiors (he works in business/finance so it's mostly all men). 

RainyDays86

I'll be telling my boss after my appointment at 8 weeks (10/17). I'm pretty nervous because I'm the head of my department and I am (currently) planning on leaving after this baby is born to be a SAHM. Not only that, but my #2 is pregnant and due a month before me.  I believe she is planning on returning after her leave, and she will be able to take over my role, but none of that is for sure.

I'll likely tell my team and the people at work I'm close to when I hit 12 weeks or so. I will probably announce that I'm not coming back in January. I am very nervous about that announcement because I'm one of the founders at our school and one of the few people who has been there since we opened.  I am also one of the few people on staff who has a kid and many people on our leadership team look up to me as an example that you can work in our field and have a kid.  And I'm planning to leave because you just can't.

awoo22

I'll be past the 13 week mark on 11/8 but will not tell anyone at work until December - POST Thanksgiving.  I was chosen for a selective program among my peers and it starts in December.  It will ultimately end in a promotion, but the last thing I need is for my boss tell my SVP that maybe I shouldn't start the program because I'll be going on leave in a few months.  I'm pretty sure that's illegal, but I'd rather keep it to myself.  So I'll be 4 months by then, but OH WELL!

WombThereItIs

SJsMommy said:

Looks like I am in the minority here. I have a home office and travel for work, which leads to me very rarely seeing my boss (maybe twice a year). I experienced a late loss with my last pregnancy, so I will wait for a while yet. In fact, I do not plan to say anything until I have had my anatomy scan around the 20 week mark. 

This is actually me. I was only planning on telling early in the second tri because that is what I did last time when I was still full time in the main office. 

With how my work is structured I could easily easily wait until January really. I just gave myself an earlier date so if I chicken out or it doesn't come up in my regular calls with my boss I still have time. Pretty excited to be a little more comfortable at home this time though! 

awebsteWed218778

My situation is a bit different - not only am I going to be telling work that I am pregnant, but I will be telling them that my husband and I will be relocating for the dream job he was just offered. As a result of this relocation, I will have to give my notice. I plan on waiting until at least 13-14 weeks which would be the first couple week of November to tell both sets of news. I just came back from maternity leave in September so I am not sure how they will take the news - I hope that by telling them a decent amount of time in advance that we can sort out a plan for a replacement. I anticipate not returning in the New Year to my job - so working up until Christmas holidays should give them enough time to plan. 

mrsrep123

I told mine almost immediately (told our parents first) so that I wouldn't get infectious patients! 

megchelle

I told some co-workers because my job requires some pulling and lifting so I need some help sometimes.  And I honestly don't care if the word spreads to my managers but I plan on telling them around 12 weeks officially.

clebl24

I told my office manger today since I'll be cutting out for appointments and bc I've felt sick. 

I work at a law firm and the partners and their spouses are going on an all day shrimping trip at the end of the month. I know, totally random. There is no way I'll be able to fake drink all day on an offshore expedition so I'll probably let the office know just before the trip. I'll be 10 weeks. 

pshaortao

With my first, I told my team leader around 8 weeks after I came back from visiting family and had a good first u/s. She knew we were trying and it was nice to have her support in the early weeks. I waited to tell my boss about 12 weeks in and eventually some coworkers who took care of spreading the word. I'm a SAHM now so obviously this doesn't apply to me anymore. If I had continued to work I probably would have held off on sharing the news until even further along (if possible), only because I had a loss earlier this year.

Yiggle09

@oliveoil my boss is male and I had issues with pumping at work with him so this time I've got a plan 

NotAPlaya-JustCrushAlot

I've already told my boss. I was sick of trying to fake my coffee order and hide dr appts. Plus, I told her when we had a loss earlier this summer and she was very supportive. I decided I'd rather tell her the good news because if anything happened, I'd tell her the bad news. 

starphish18

@Yiggle09 Care to elaborate? That sounded devious and I love it. 

amprince22

I told my boss so she would be aware of me taking a few more breaks, but I told her she may not discuss it with anyone (she is a big gossip). I am transferring to a different departments though so I am nervous about telling them. I won't be telling anyone else until second trimester 

lyallmama

*TW* with DS I didn't tell work until about 18 weeks (we were having a restructure and I wanted to make sure I got the role I wanted). This time I told my boss straight away. She is really lovely and understands that I'm feeling sick and exhausted all the time. I also had a MMC earlier this year and needed a week off, and she was great about that too so I trust her to keep it a secret until I'm ready to tell everyone else. 

tumbleweed-1

Perhaps all of you working moms have some advice for me? I am finishing my final term of school and my ideal plan was to pick up a job with a committee or in a legislators office in my states' legislature. It only meets from January - late June/early July. The sucky thing about our state politics is how temporary the jobs are. You do session work, then you do campaign/election work. 

That was my plan before discovering we are expecting. I would still love to do that, and some jobs are already being advertised (a lot of it is also word of mouth). I had an internship there in our last "long" session, and my SO worked there last year in the "short" (one month long) session. Sadly, his boss suddenly passed away and now he is looking for a new session job too. (He is doing election work right now). I've contemplated joining too, but now that the cat needs meds 3x a day for the next week or two, one of us needs to be at home for that. That's a tangent. My point is, I have a few connections and can ask for references. 

Ideally I start applying for things like yesterday. If I get to the interview process, should I disclose my pregnancy and that I wouldn't be able to finish the entire session? I know the interviewer is not allowed to ask, but if I am doing interviews even at the end of November I'll be 17 weeks- I might be showing. It's my first pregancy so I don't know when I'll show. Has anyone else interviewed while pregnant- noticably or not? If it was a long term job that I could come back to I might feel differently. I just don't know if I should say that I can't do the last month or month and a half of a temp job. 

Any advice? I'm open to pursuing other lines of work, or staying home with the baby for a while, if we can afford to. Thanks. Good luck telling all of your bosses/coworkers. I hope it goes over smoothly. 

SP128

I'm going to try to hold off until after Christmas break.  I'll tell the speech pathologist that I share an office with I'm sure before then.  I work in 2 schools.  The staff at one school is pretty uncouth - so I'm sure someone will say something or at least whisper behind my back when they see the weight gain.  For instance, people found out I was engaged in Feb and getting married in July the response was "You're not pregnant are you?"

I'll tell my principals first though.

Candy_bandit

My boss asked me today... I told her I hope so but don't know for sure. They know we have been trying and I have been an absolute psycho losing my temper, almost crying, the works. It helps that we are all really stressed out, I had totally forgotten how bitchy I was last pregnancy at work and need to make an effort to tone it down! I'll probably tell after the first appointment- a week from now. I got so pissed off today I came home early and was looking for random part-time work. The crazy is strong with this one. (And of course now I love my job again two hours later)

NurseK2016

I ended up telling my nurse manager and shift supervisor the Monday after our BFP, but only because there are certain things at work that I can't do or have to take extra precautions for being KU. I knew I would tell them sooner than the rest of our department since we work in the same tiny office and they would notice my time off for appointments but planned on waiting a little longer than I did. I have only told one other coworker, who is pregnant and due in March, but kept running her mouth about how she thought I might be pregnant. I asked her to keep it quite and as far as I know she has respected my wishes. I plan to tell the rest of our department right after thanksgiving (14ish weeks).  --sorry for the chapter book

CherryBananas

I told everyone everyone at work the day after my BFP.  I work with x-rays, and there are some chemicals in our lab I can't be exposed to so they needed to know right away.

samyv

I told my bosses this week. I am 6 weeks now. I work until media and my job requires me to be available a lot. I'm lucky that they are both women and my director is a mother herself. They were great about it. 

achays11

I'm not planning on telling until Thanksgiving, unless you can start to tell sooner than that. One of co-workers left and I was hoping they would give me some of his responsibilities. They did, sooner than I thought, and a raise. So now I feel like I need to prove myself before I tell them that I'm pregnant. 

cclaineDC

I plan to tell work in December, after or during my next performance review.