@sidecarsareforbishes I actually asked my doctor if it was possible to pop my stitches while pooping (I had some bright read blood in the vicinity after my second PP BM). I had a second degree tear and she said it was no where near close enough for that to be a possibility. Just an FYI.
So I have kind of a direct/weird question for all you ladies that have had babies already and delivered vaginally....how bad is the pain down there really? I live on the 3rd floor of an apt so I can only imagine what doing the stairs is going to feel like when we come home from the hospital. Does it constantly kill?? Or is it just bad for a few days and then gradually better?
My house is 3 stories. The nursery is on the first floor, we hangout on the 2nd, and our room is on the third. I was fine after a few days. Felt normal after a week. No tear, delivered twins vaginally. To be honest, the boys were in the hospital for a week and I think I was running on adrenaline so I wasn't focusing on my broken vag.
@MRSCORKER I know them feelz, I still haven't posted Johnny's announcement or birth story because I can't even think about it without having a meltdown. :::HUGS::: I hope you start feeling better soon!
Sex does hurt at first, but the more you do it, the sooner it gets better. I learned that lesson the hard way. (Also, if you're breastfeeding, lubricant is a must.)
PP Sex: It was uncomfortable at first (from what I recall with my previous two children), but I also remember me being able to enjoy it a few minutes into it once I actually quit stressing about it and tried focusing on enjoying it. I plan to use a little booze and lube this go around to keep those inhibitions and dryness at bay. We've schedule sex for the 25th. That's when I get my implant in my arm, and FI refuses to come near me until I have it haha
For STM and beyond - has anyone struggled with PP incontinance? I'm finding that I feel very little control over my bowels when I'm up and around. Like, I can't squeeze the muscles anymore. It almost feels like everything is numb and it freaks me out. I'm not having accidents or anything, but definitely some gas that I just can't control.
@annabenanna It's progesterone only and supposed to be BF friendly, so that's what I opted for. This will be my first experience with it though, so if you'd like I'll keep you updated on how it goes
@lindzsers The first week, it was super hard to hold back gas, and every poop felt incredibly urgent. It's better now though, I'll be 3 weeks PP tomorrow. I think it just takes time for those muscles to fuckin properly again.
@MRSCORKER I'm on c section number 3, and it doesn't get any less disappointing each time. I tried to vbac with baby 2&3, and it just never worked out. My first was insanely tramatic and it didn't quit hit me until my baby was a few weeks old. I wish I had spoken to the doctor about it sooner cause I has horrible birth trauma and didn't even relize it. I guess when you hear the words, "don't bother scrubbing in Doctor, if you don't hurry up this baby will be dead." Right before they put you to sleep you will be traumatized.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
@Schell2013 Omg, what an awful thing to overhear! I'm so sorry you experienced that! I don't remember a whole lot from the surgery because it went so fast and because I passed out for most of it. I already told my H that I will likely talk to a professional, even if I think I'm fine.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
OMG yes the postpartum emotions are no joke! Especially having my babe in the NICU made it worse I think. At first I was worried that it was a sign of PPD but then I realized I was crying for every emotion, including happiness. Sometimes just looking at my baby made me want to burst into tears from joy, or out of sadness from seeing pictures of my dogs at home while still in the NICU, or anxiety from struggling to breastfeed. Since I've been home the past couple days I've felt much more emotionally stable.
I sobbed and sobbed last night about missing little guy that we are working to adopt. In his whole I've never been away from him more than a week and so far its been two weeks and 2 days.
*American lady living in Tanzania.
DH - Tanzanian Maasai
BFP #1 - MC Dec 2, 2015 (@ 9weeks) BFP #2 - Feb 2, 2016 --EDD 10/10/16 --Abigail- October 6, 2016. Heart warrior. October 2017- Began fostering to adopt T, (DOB:November 19, 2013)
@lindzsers, I too was super incontinent the first week after delivery. The Gas was relentless and it felt like I would never be able to hold it in ever again. Peeing too felt super urgent. Now 2 weeks pp and I can hold my farts in again. Lol. My pee too!
Does anyone else get really anxious at night? I think I'm worried about him wailing for hours and not being able to calm him. Plus, during the day, we have visitors and help but at night, it's just us.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
Married: November 2014
TTC #1 Since: October 2015
BFP #1: 11/18/15 - CP BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16 IT'S A BOY!!!! DS Born 10/16/16
Does anyone else get really anxious at night? I think I'm worried about him wailing for hours and not being able to calm him. Plus, during the day, we have visitors and help but at night, it's just us.
YES. But 2 weeks in and I definitely feel better. In the beginning I absolutely had anxiety about nighttime for the exact reasons you said combined with the fact that I knew I wouldn't be getting much sleep. But now that we're in somewhat of a routine I'm feeling more confident and much less anxious. I think it's very common.
Does anyone else get really anxious at night? I think I'm worried about him wailing for hours and not being able to calm him. Plus, during the day, we have visitors and help but at night, it's just us.
I've already had a couple nights of Baby crying for NO REASON for like an hour in the middle of the night, and let me just say.....take deep breaths and remember that the baby can't understand what you're saying or why you're agitated. The first night I got super annoyed and agitated and angry at Baby. A combination of baby blues, sleep deprivation, and my own type A personality combined to a horrible night of me telling Baby "shh...be quiet....shutupshutupshutup!!!!" And then me waking up the next morning feeling super guilty that I told my two week old to shut up.
After that I vowed to be better and not be angry, because Baby can't help it. So things have gotten a lot better. I definitely think time helps things. Baby now recognizes me as Mommy, I feel more competent in taking care of him, and I've been through enough loud nights to know that it gets better in the morning and I just need to wait it out.
So that's my advice for nighttime wailing: it'll get better, you just have to try and stay calm and wait it out.
Ditto to the anxiety @MRSCORKER. I had anxiety and depression issues prior to getting pregnant so I was pretty worried about how that would manifest post partum. The first few days I was so agitated. I couldn't sit still, needed to be doing something, checking my phone, etc. I honestly think I had a mild bit of PTSD from the trauma of delivery. Night tight was the worst for anxiety. I didn't know how I'd be able to sleep.
Now, a week later I am feeling better. I have spells that come and go, but I've been able to take a step back and stop the manic activities and just relax with baby.
@bamacoop Thank you for sharing that. I remember the horrid guilt I felt for being upset with DD's night wailing when I was a FTM, but I never spoke out about it. I never knew it was normal or okay to feel agitated. I want all of you to know if it happens to you- it's okay. It's frustrating, and getting frustrated doesn't make you a bad mom. Just wait it out, it WILL get better.
I've already had a couple nights of Baby crying for NO REASON for like an hour in the middle of the night, and let me just say.....take deep breaths and remember that the baby can't understand what you're saying or why you're agitated. The first night I got super annoyed and agitated and angry at Baby. A combination of baby blues, sleep deprivation, and my own type A personality combined to a horrible night of me telling Baby "shh...be quiet....shutupshutupshutup!!!!" And then me waking up the next morning feeling super guilty that I told my two week old to shut up.
After that I vowed to be better and not be angry, because Baby can't help it. So things have gotten a lot better. I definitely think time helps things. Baby now recognizes me as Mommy, I feel more competent in taking care of him, and I've been through enough loud nights to know that it gets better in the morning and I just need to wait it out.
So that's my advice for nighttime wailing: it'll get better, you just have to try and stay calm and wait it out.
@MRSCORKER - I felt the exact same way at the beginning, and it's only starting to lessen. I would just dread nighttime. It's nice to hear how common it is - thank you for asking the question.
Last night was our first night of Robert fussing to fuss. He's usually up at night but rarely cries. FI got a little frustrated, i was surprisingly able to keep it together. But if it weren't for him i probably would have been crying right along with Robert.
In regards to the implant (nexaplon) i had it for 5 years before TTC. I swear by it. I had maybe 2 periods a year. And that is the BC I plan on using again.
I feel for you ladies with super fussy babies. My second was colicky, had reflux and her days and nights mixed up. She would sleep for an hour or two and be up for an hour or two and scream all the time. I used gripe water (with the alcohol) and just took it night by night. Since I had a toddler already it was really hard. I found wrapping her in the moby wrap helped soothe her. Also if your needing a break don't be afraid to lay them down for 10 minutes somewhere safe and walk away. My doctor said It's better than getting frustrated.
Things got much better by the 6-7 week mark. Keep your chin up girls, this will honestly pass.
Warning
No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
@AshleyGemini24 That's what I like to hear about the implant! I'm pretty excited about it. I'm looking forward to 3 years of protection without a shot or IUD!
@MRSCORKER I definitely have the night time anxiety. Granted we're only a week in, but some nights she sleeps for 2-3 hours at a time, and then some nights she won't sleep without one of us holding her at all. My husband is still on paternity leave, so I get so worried about what it's going to be like when he goes back to work and won't be able to take turns at night as much. I also can't keep all the horrible things that can happen out of my mind, I used to be a pediatric intensive care unit nurse, and thinking about the kids I used to take care of scares the crap out of me, then I get all emotional and cry. I'm just hoping it gets better once the PP hormones smooth out.
My bleeding stopped around day 4 pp and has just been brown old blood since. Today at 9 days pp, the bright red blood is back. Anyone else have it disappear then come back days later?
My bleeding stopped around day 4 pp and has just been brown old blood since. Today at 9 days pp, the bright red blood is back. Anyone else have it disappear then come back days later?
yes, ask your OB but it isn't unusual. Sometimes they will tell you that you're "doing too much" or to take it easy or something. Right.
Ditto on night time anxiety. We had an episode early Tuesday morning I must have fallen asleep while nursing in my rocking chair and woke up to baby crying on the floor. Went to er and she was fine but I am completely freaked out now.
As as far as recovery I feel great just bad edema swelling in legs and feet
ditto about the crying baby for no reason. Baby will just cry and cry at night for what seems no reason. Really frustrates DH who wants to figure out why he is crying, but I'm thinking it's just part of being a newborn.
WORF: I did not come here to
admire the scenery.
DAX: If you say so. I guess we should just go
home.
WORF: Well maybe. I would not be so hasty.
DAX: I take it the scenery has improved?
WORF: A few months ago, when I was commanding
the Defiant on a scouting mission in the Gamma Quadrant, we encountered a
protostar cluster, a swirling mass of colour set against a background of
glowing clouds and burning sky. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever
seen, until now.
DAX: I've got to take you on vacation more
often.
If the belly is full, the butt is clean, and the babe has been burped, sometimes babe just has to cry. Note: if you hold baby a lot during the day, baby will expect that same during the night. So cosleeping may be a good choice for some if possible, if not- giving baby a little more alone time in an area similar to his or her bed during the day may help. This is a confusing and overwhelming time for these tiny people, it'll take some adjustment is all
@MRSCORKER Yes, I've had some breakdowns at night when baby is fussy and hungry but won't latch or sleepy but wakes up when I put him down. I definitely think the postpartum hormones are still influencing me here. Some nights baby sleeps and eats every few hours, but sometimes he seems to have a witching hour between about 9pm-1am where he wants to cluster feed and won't sleep. One thing I've found most helpful is to go to sleep super early and give myself plenty of time to get as much sleep in as possible, takes a little pressure off. I've also found it more relaxing to watch TV during feedings and not feed in the nursery which makes time go slower.
Re: All things Post Partum
Me: 28 DH: 27
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
But yes, the tears are real. I cried all last week and all weekend. Today, I finally feel normal! But who knows how soon that'll change.
Sex after delivery, I can't think about it... Im so scared how bad it'll hurt!
I plan to use a little booze and lube this go around to keep those inhibitions and dryness at bay.
We've schedule sex for the 25th. That's when I get my implant in my arm, and FI refuses to come near me until I have it haha
@lindzsers The first week, it was super hard to hold back gas, and every poop felt incredibly urgent. It's better now though, I'll be 3 weeks PP tomorrow. I think it just takes time for those muscles to fuckin properly again.
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
It's a boy!
BFP #2 - Feb 2, 2016 --EDD 10/10/16 --Abigail- October 6, 2016. Heart warrior.
October 2017- Began fostering to adopt T, (DOB:November 19, 2013)
Me: 32 & DH: 37
BFP #2: 2/8/16 - EDD 10/20/16
IT'S A BOY!!!!
DS Born 10/16/16
This time I have zoloft. It is BETTER.
After that I vowed to be better and not be angry, because Baby can't help it. So things have gotten a lot better. I definitely think time helps things. Baby now recognizes me as Mommy, I feel more competent in taking care of him, and I've been through enough loud nights to know that it gets better in the morning and I just need to wait it out.
So that's my advice for nighttime wailing: it'll get better, you just have to try and stay calm and wait it out.
Also, I'm sure you're doing great!
Edit, because I forgot to tag @MRSCORKER
Now, a week later I am feeling better. I have spells that come and go, but I've been able to take a step back and stop the manic activities and just relax with baby.
In regards to the implant (nexaplon) i had it for 5 years before TTC. I swear by it. I had maybe 2 periods a year. And that is the BC I plan on using again.
Things got much better by the 6-7 week mark. Keep your chin up girls, this will honestly pass.
Married: 10/11/15
Baby girl Addie born 10/12/16
As as far as recovery I feel great just bad edema swelling in legs and feet
WORF: I did not come here to admire the scenery.
DAX: If you say so. I guess we should just go home.
WORF: Well maybe. I would not be so hasty.
DAX: I take it the scenery has improved?
WORF: A few months ago, when I was commanding the Defiant on a scouting mission in the Gamma Quadrant, we encountered a protostar cluster, a swirling mass of colour set against a background of glowing clouds and burning sky. It was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen, until now.
DAX: I've got to take you on vacation more often.
Note: if you hold baby a lot during the day, baby will expect that same during the night. So cosleeping may be a good choice for some if possible, if not- giving baby a little more alone time in an area similar to his or her bed during the day may help.
This is a confusing and overwhelming time for these tiny people, it'll take some adjustment is all
It's a boy!