***TTCAL Check-In Week of 9/12**** - Page 2 — The Bump
TTC After a Loss

***TTCAL Check-In Week of 9/12****

2»

Re: ***TTCAL Check-In Week of 9/12****

  • @chloe97 I agree on that front. I tried searching the IF, HIgh-Risk, and TTTC board for info on APS and can't find much of anything. It'd be nice if there was more traffic over there.
  • 1. Introduce yourself (if you're new): I am new. Just posted my intro last week, but I will put a brief one here. 24, married for a little over 2 years, first loss about a month ago, "trying again, but not trying again" for a while. 

    2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.): I am currently in the TWW phase (I think). Things are a bit wonky. DH and I were not expecting me to ovulate as soon as I did and BD on 9/5 and that afternoon I took an ovulation test (just to start seeing if they would get darker and BOOM. So...we BD a few more times that week and here we are. 

    3. Rants/raves: RANT: There are currently several teachers in the building I teach at who are pregnant and every time I hear them complain about how terrible it is to be pregnant, I WANT TO SCREAM. I have been excluding myself from a lot of social situations with them (like lunch in the staffroom), but now I feel like they think I am rude. Ugh. I don't even know. RAVE: My husband packed my lunch this morning because I overslept. :)

    4. GTKY: Tell us about your history with The Bump. How did you find the Bump community? What made you start participating in The Bump? Do you participate in any other TTC forums? 
    I used The Knot for my wedding stuff a couple years ago, so I sporadically creeped on the Bump, because hubby and I spoke about not wanting to wait too long to try to get pregnant. I started participating last month when I got my BFP and was in the April 2016 Club. I have never participated in any other TTC forums, but I did creep them. 
    Me: 25 | DH: 24
    Married: 06/14/14
    Fur Babies: Samara (Lab) & Akiva (Pom)
    Foster Parents
    MC: 8/18/2016
    szwill86
  • Hey ladies! Gah I hate being back at work only because I miss being able to check in here more regularly! I promise I will be back for comments sometime this week but for right now I am going to selfishly post and ghost.

    2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.): WTO, CD7

    3. Rants/raves: The reality is that my anxiety is kind of out of control right now. I haven't felt this lost in terms of how to help myself in years. Every time I feel like I maybe have a handle on something for a second, something else happens that pushes me right back over the edge. The only thing that is helping me right now is how busy I am at work. Yesterday I stayed at work doing things and then went shopping and took the long way home just to avoid being at home by myself (DH was working until 9 pm). When I finally did get home I felt so overwhelmed I just started crying. Part of the problem is that I rely WAY too much on H to help me through these tough moments. He doesn't even have to do anything but when he's home I feel so much better and am able to calm down. But he's a pharmacist and works a retail schedule. And this is his long week. He's working this weekend and I'm desperately trying to come up with things to do so I don't have to sit at home by myself. I've been so anxious I even briefly considered TTA, which is the absolute last thing I want. I don't think I will. But I would be surprised if this anxiety doesn't affect this cycle either way. 

    4. GTKY: Tell us about your history with The Bump. How did you find the Bump community? What made you start participating in The Bump? Do you participate in any other TTC forums?
    Honestly, I don't even remember. I have been thinking about TTC long before I knew I would actually start. And I used to look things up and I'm pretty sure it landed me in the bump forums pretty frequently. When I was ready to start TTC I think this was the first place I thought of. And that is all probably why.
    Me: 28 DH: 26
    Married: November 2015  3 
    TTC#1: January 2016
    BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
    BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17
    DD Born 06/23/17 3
    TFAS: April 2018
    BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP
    BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19


    rainbowturtlesszwill86TScalei
  • Thinking of you @BitterBetty12. I've had the same thoughts about needing to get my anxiety under control before TTC. I'm in the TWW so if I'm pregnant, I will just have to deal. After 2 losses there is no way that I'm not going to have some major anxiety issues.

    I'm a big podcast person- so I started a new one called Anxiety Guru. It's a guy, I'm really not sure if his credentials- sounds like he's an anxiety coach? Anyway, he's had some great ideas about strategies to control anxiety. I just listened to one so far, but found it helpful. 

    Another thing I've tried doing is crying more. May sound counterintuitive, but my anxiety is the manifestation of my grief and my grief needs to be released somehow or it becomes anxiety. I let myself start to think about how unfair it is that I'm suffering like this. Eventually the water works start flowing. I do a lot of my crying in my car on my 1 HR commute. I know it's hard to find time and space to cry if you don't get a lot of time to yourself. 

    Age 39, H 38

    Married 8/15

    Pregnancy #1, MMC, D&C November/December 2015
    Pregnancy #2, Dx with Triploidy at 12 weeks, MMC, D&C May 2016
    Pregnancy #3 BFP 10/20/2016- EDD 7/01/2017
    DD was born on June 26, 2017
    Pregnancy #4 CP 4/2018
    Pregnancy #5 BFP 9/13/2018, EDD= 5/27/2019
    BitterBetty12
  • @chloe97 You are SO right about crying helping. I tried to keep myself from crying in certain moments where I felt like it just wouldn't be productive. But I found that keeping it in just made me sad and anxious while on the verge of tears for the rest of the day. Crying is incredibly cathartic. It gives me the time and outlet to acknowledge that what happened to me IS unfair, and it does suck so incredibly bad. I also do a lot of my crying on my commute. Sometimes I even intentionally put sad music on. I need that time to grieve and mourn, because even though the rest of the world is going about their business, I can't just pretend that I'm the same person I was 5 months ago. I also love the idea of listening to a podcast. I am going to try that. Thank you so much for the recommendation!
    Me: 28 DH: 26
    Married: November 2015  3 
    TTC#1: January 2016
    BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
    BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17
    DD Born 06/23/17 3
    TFAS: April 2018
    BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP
    BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19


    chloe97KarenBeth714RiverSong15
  • RiverSong15RiverSong15 member
    1000 Comments 500 Love Its Third Anniversary First Answer
    edited September 2016
    @chloe97 and @BitterBetty22 - you can add me to the Commuting Criers Club. What is it about the commute that lends itself to that? Perhaps it's the transiton between two places (work and home) where I keep myself too busy to cry. But I've definitely been that weirdo tearing up in the car.

    I hope you both find good ways to deal with your anxiety. It's a bitch to deal with and I'm sending good vibes your way.
    chloe97BitterBetty12
  • @riversong15 @chloe97 @bitterbetty12 - You can add me to that group too. I think its just time that you are really alone with your thoughts and it all just kind of comes out. I agree that its good to feel how you are feeling. I think its okay to feel sad, bitter, angry and after all that we have been through its hard to "relax".

    @bitterbetty12 - My DH and I work opposite shifts so I totally get being alone. I have walked around the mall plenty of nights just because I don't want to go home to an empty house and my thoughts. I definitely rely on my DH a lot too and just feel so much better when he is around ( which unfortunately is not a lot bec of our work schedules). There are so many other factors that just makes this process more difficult. Hugs to you this week!
    BitterBetty12RiverSong15
  • @RiverSong15 @TScalei @chloe97 We can be the car criers club! It's weird that it is so helpful for all of us. I do think there is something about the transition from one part of your life to another (work to home) that has something to do with it for sure.

    Thank you guys for always being here to listen  <3
    Me: 28 DH: 26
    Married: November 2015  3 
    TTC#1: January 2016
    BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
    BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17
    DD Born 06/23/17 3
    TFAS: April 2018
    BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP
    BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19


    RiverSong15TScalei
  • @RiverSong15 @TScalei @chloe97 We can be the car criers club! It's weird that it is so helpful for all of us. I do think there is something about the transition from one part of your life to another (work to home) that has something to do with it for sure.

    Thank you guys for always being here to listen  <3
    Count me in. I still cry once or twice a week on the drive home. It's basically the release of all the triggers during the day that I have repressed so I don't cry at work 
    BFP #1: 1.22.16                 MMC: 2.29.16 ( tetrasomy 11, partial deletion 1, XXX) D&C: 3.2.16
    BFP #2: 4.14.16                 CP: 4.17.16
    BFP #3: 6.10.2016             CP: 6.17.16
    RE appt: 6.27.2016- saline sono all clear
    Progenity: + carrier Tay-Sachs, Gaucher's, hemachromatosis. DH: carrier Alpha 1 anti-trypsin
    PCOS, hypothyroid, MTHFR, hx of LEEP in 2006
    Clomid + TI Cycle #1: 50mg Trigger 8.24.2016- BFN
    Clomid 75mg + IUI#1 9.25.2016- BFP #4 10/6
    Beta #1 15   Beta #2 38    Beta #3- 71     beta #4 171   Beta # 5- 21  Natural MC 10/21
    HSG- clear
    IVF Jan 2017
    Egg Retrieval 1.22.17: 32 eggs retrieved,29 mature, 24 fertilized, 14 to blastocyst for biopsy
    PGS results: 4 PGS normal 2 XX, 2 XY
    FET: 3.13.2017 for 2 PGS embryos
    Beta#1: 3.24.2017......... 78; Beta # 2 241; Beta #3 4198
    Baby BOY due 11.29.2017






    BitterBetty12TScaleichloe97
  • Oh I forgot to do my check-in!

    2. Status (WTO, TWW, Benched, etc.): 
    I am currently WTO for the first time in months. I got my first OPK yesterday and I will start testing tomorrow, that will be CD12. If i don't get pregnant now, next cycle (october) we will try a medicated cycle with Femara and estrogen.

    3. Rants/raves:
    RANT: I've had bronchitis for over 3 weeks, have taken antibiotics, antivirals, and all sorts of things and still not ok. I am really sick of it because my energy levels are at 50% ... ohhhh and I need my energy to BD :P

    4. GTKY: Tell us about your history with The Bump. How did you find the Bump community? What made you start participating in The Bump? Do you participate in any other TTC forums?
    I found the Bump through The Knot. I joined the Knot when I got engaged and started planning my wedding. Then, as we decided to start TTC, it seemed like a good idea to start lurking at the Bump, finding out all the information to be prepared TTC and all. I've been active at my BMB when I got my first BFP in january, and then moved to Miscarriage and Pregnancy Loss in february.  After my D&C I moved on to TTCAL and have been here ever since. I find that the ladies here are so welcoming and supportive, I am really thankful to have found this board, that helped me so much during both of my losses.
    Married 06.21.14 / TTC since 11.15 /
    BFP 01.03.2016 / MMC 6w5d D&C 02.2016 // BFP 05.06.16 / natural MC 05.12.16
    Benched 06.2016-08.2016 / TTC again 09.2016! On a diet. Cranky.
    BFP 10.02.2016 / NT scan at 12w looked normal / Anatomy scan at 20w everything ok
    Team blue! / EDD June 11th 2017
    DAVID ROGER was born on May 23rd at 37 weeks.

    Architect, Peruvian living in Chile. I love art, opera and good chocolate.
    Started PhD studies in Architecture on 2017.
    Fur mom of a rescued miniature poodle called Luke Skywalker.


    Lilypie First Birthday tickers
    BitterBetty12chloe97amberruka
  • @DungeonTrollMel In May/June I was having an issue because I was actually crying on my way in to work, which was a total cluster f*ck because trying to stop and actually get myself together was impossible. Of course that was directly post loss. Crying on the way home is definitely a lot better. You're also right that it's a release of all the things that have been building. 
    Me: 28 DH: 26
    Married: November 2015  3 
    TTC#1: January 2016
    BFP #1: 5/02/16 - MC: 5/27/16
    BFP #2: 10/06/16: 6 - EDD: 06/20/17
    DD Born 06/23/17 3
    TFAS: April 2018
    BFP #3: 03/21/18 - CP
    BFP #4: 04/23/18 - EDD 01/04/19


    chloe97
  • That's exciting @yolandamunoz! I'm sure that's a great feeling to be back on track.  Fx for you this cycle!
    BitterBetty12
2»
Sign In or Register to comment.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards