I know many have judged me here but I am asking for support.. I got pregnant back in june. It was a girl. I did the horrid progesterone shots. I was soo sick. vomiting from the beginning. even on Zofran. My husband was a complete jerk to me the entire time. I had just gotten off work since I work in a school and that just seems to make him so jealous since he has to go to work.. I wasn't cleaning much since I just had the transfer and honestly was scared to do too much. I was also so very sick with morning sickness day and night. I would go to my moms house ( a few min away) and just chill there for a few hours and talk to my grandma and nieces. He would say I was ignoring him and not texting him fast enough. He complained that I text them when I am with him and he deserves that same treatment. He also was super crabby that My ten year old was having her cousins at the house.. he said it was too loud, the house is too small... He wanted only one of her friends at a time since it was too loud. All of these things kept happening. I had a hard time kissing him since I was feeling like throwing up.. I told him this.. Apparently he was crabby about this. He was also crabby because I said no to a jeep wrangler convertible and a baby ,, I guess when I got pregnant he realized that he couldn't get it.. He said he was crabby I wouldn't even consider the Jeep. He was being competitive with my daughter and upset one night that I sat next to her when we went out to eat. Said he wasn't gonna go eat anymore. All of these things happened,, and meanwhile I was trying to stay sane on hormones. So long story short- I stopped the progesterone. I was scared to death to have a baby w this man. I lost my baby girl.. This was 7 weeks ago now. I was 9 weeks. I feel like a pos person and I am crying daily. My husband got his Jeep after all.
Now he says he is upset I stopped the shots and he needs to figure out what our plans for future are. He always saw a baby in it... Why was he so miserable the whole time I was pregnant then? Why was he upset over a Jeep then??? Im so sad .. I feel like a horrible person. I can just use some support. I am in counseling and in marriage counseling. His counselor said he has issues with self gratification, WE have barely any money yet he got a car that has a 550$ montly payment and bought 1200$ wheels for it on his cc.. this was his thoughts when I was trying to keep a baby alive. I don't know how to get over this . or how to save my marriage. feeling hopeless.