FFFC

ButterMyBiscuit

Who are we kidding? There will be flames. Confess anyway..

MamaBish

I am trying to convince DH to lie to everyone once we know the baby's sex and tell people we are naming the kid something ridiculous.

MrsRo731

Some times I pretend I didn't get texts from a certain family member because I don't feel like writing back to her.

RachelT1234

My MIL stopped by without prior notice, and when I realized who was at the door... I hid.  I can't condone drop in visits like that!  She left a casserole on the front porch, so not only will she hopefully call ahead now, but I didn't have to cook last night. Win-win. 

Edited to remove my failed gif

HMcDade1

I'm a terrible person - but I just don't feel like dealing with the recall on the infant car seat I just got. I don't feel like being an adult and figuring it all out and how to get a new one, I just want stuff to work right the first time... So as bad as it sounds for right now I'm ignoring it. Maybe I'll deal with it in May once schools over. Ugh. Am I that irresponsible for wanting to risk a cracked handle ? 

fantasticmrsfox

HMcDade1 said:

I'm a terrible person - but I just don't feel like dealing with the recall on the infant car seat I just got. I don't feel like being an adult and figuring it all out and how to get a new one, I just want stuff to work right the first time... So as bad as it sounds for right now I'm ignoring it. Maybe I'll deal with it in May once schools over. Ugh. Am I that irresponsible for wanting to risk a cracked handle ? 

With as much as you will carry that car seat by the handle I would get it replaced. There were obviously enough occurrences for them to recall it in the first place. 

Nerdchild

@HMcDade1 If it is just the handle portion causing the recall, maybe just stop moving/carrying it from the car and just move/carry the kiddo until you find the mental energy to look into a new carseat? I feel you on being drained and over it, and I know if it were a safety recall that dealt with failing to protect your little one in a crash you would have dealt with it as soon as you knew. It seems maybe not using the handle is a good compromise?

Eta: Response to @HMcDade1 below: Oh, that changes everything. Yeah, wait until May, no biggie! You have plenty of time!

HMcDade1

I haven't even taken it out of the box - it's for the new baby which is partially why I'm being laid back about hoping on doing it right now because we won't even be using it until July 

Nerdchild

My FFFC: I brought up not having my husband's friends come down for the birth (they had invited themselves and the boys get rowdy together, plus they would have to bring their 3 year old, too much for me right after birth). He gave me a lame 'they are my family too' and I went full preggo-zilla and told him while technically and legally this baby is half his, the birth experience is 100 percent mine and I had no legal obligation to even allow him into the birth room. I would never really keep him from experiencing the birth, but I felt I needed to make my point that I had already made up my mind and was just letting him know as a courtesy. I feel awful doing the whole 'my pregnancy, my rules' thing, but if it works it works. 

chanfa

Last night my DH and I yelled at my FIL because he is an asshole that tears the family apart but blames us. He puts unnecessary standards on everywhere and he's never satisfied. For example, my SIL is currently going through therapy because of the crap she went through with him. My DH gets yelled at for his decisions he made when he was in college (13+years ago). We told him that we are afraid of our child growing up with him and that I don't want him to be alone with the child. 

If i continue this story, my blood pressure will go up. Maybe one day I will write it in a bitchfest but I have been dizzy since I woke up this morning.

quartz02

Put the moves on DH this morning and totally got shot down. LOL! He came home at 2am from a work trip so I don't blame him. I was still bummed though.


ETA: I am not doing a nursery for this baby. DD was in our room for almost 11 months. We're in a bigger place now, so I'm just putting the crib, changing table, and glider in our bedroom. I think once this baby gets to sleep through the night, I'll convert DD's room to a joint bedroom.

Also, bedding sets for babies are a huge waste of money. Nobody uses the damn quilt. Just buy a crib sheet, maybe a bed skirt if you care, and call it a day. Cost of bedding sets are outrageous. Crib sheets are like $9 at Target...

mckcak23

I know everyone hates it but I'm totally planning on pulling the pregnancy card this weekend. I have either worked my second job or attended some fundraiser every night this week. I'm flipping tired. I have clients on both Saturday and Sunday but I am going to sleep in and do nothing beyond that and the lunch dates that DH and I have planned with friends. I see many naps in my future. No cleaning or laundry. 

HMcDade1

@Nerdchild now that I admitted that I didn't want to deal with it made me feel guilty enough to look it up- I literally send them an email, they ship me a part that gets screwed on the handle and ta-da fixed. I think it's doable. Now I just have to find the serial numbers... But I still may wait until May.. 

Nerdchild

@chanfa Lend me your bravery. I'm dreading the upcoming talk with my father-in-law where I explain that I don't want my child exposed to his racist/sexist/homophobic viewpoints. I still want him in this child's life, but I think he should be able to handle keeping certain things out of conversation/letting me as the parent answer whatever questions my kid has. All the dread. 

mckcak23

@chanfa I have not had the conversation with FIL or smil but I have informed DH that his smil will never be alone with my child because I don't trust her in general but I really don't trust what she will say about me to my kid. I feel bad because I would trust FIL but he chose to marry her so he looses by default. 

KASG

I *almost* want Donald Trump to win just so I can move to Australia.

Also, I sometimes pretend to be asleep so that DH will walk our dog.

chanfa

@Nerdchild My "bravery" was actually my anger that I have had for the last 2.5yrs. I spent the last 2.5yrs living with a man that consistently puts me and my DH down and now it's time for us to stand up for our future child. It's different for me because I don't want him in my child's life but it is my DH's wish that he is. I told DH that his dad is not allowed to be alone with the kid, and he can't argue with MIL in front the baby. If they do, then forget it. He told us yesterday that he wants US to be flexible and listen to their opinions about the baby. Thankfully my DH said that we will listen, but the decision is still ours in the end. Our baby, our rules. 

I am sorry you are going through this too and I understand how scary it is because children learn from the adults around them. I am not an expert, but boundaries need to be set with people like our FILs. He won't like it but guess what, this is for the welfare of our children. Do what is best for you.

chanfa

@mckcak23 Yea... my MIL is great with kids but all I hear my In laws do at home is fight when they are alone. They speak another language and I don't know what they are saying, but I know they are fighting.

I told them that yesterday, I told them that I am worried that they will fight when they are alone with the baby. She said that she promises she won't but DH told her straight up that he doesn't believe it. 

I am sad that there are horrible people out there in the world who intend to screw things up for others..

stillcozy

I find it laughable how democrats were criticizing republicans who stated they wanted to leave the country after Obama got elected and say how childish it was yada yada yet so many people now say it about trump. The pot is calling the kettle black! Also I'm a moderate so I don't strongly align to any party just to say. 

Y0urm0m

@Nerdchild you shouldn't have to have any talks with FIL. Your DH needs to do the talking and shut that shit down real quick and let him know there well be consequences if he doesn't obey your parenting rules. If your DH is not willing to stand up to daddy then you have a DH problem.

Taymiller

Nerdchild said:

@chanfa Lend me your bravery. I'm dreading the upcoming talk with my father-in-law where I explain that I don't want my child exposed to his racist/sexist/homophobic viewpoints. I still want him in this child's life, but I think he should be able to handle keeping certain things out of conversation/letting me as the parent answer whatever questions my kid has. All the dread. 

I struggle with this too. How do you teach your kid that what grandpa says is not true and that he is actually an ass? Dh

ButterMyBiscuit

My confession is that I'm having a hard time accepting new BMB members. I'm sure everyone is just peachy, I've just gotten comfortable. Sue me.

thebigoaktree

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

I find it laughable how democrats were criticizing republicans who stated they wanted to leave the country after Obama got elected and say how childish it was yada yada yet so many people now say it about trump. The pot is calling the kettle black! Also I'm a moderate so I don't strongly align to any party just to say. 

Does Trump count a serious candidate? However, I would move to Canada if he's elected. 

Y0urm0m

Taymiller said:

Nerdchild said:

@chanfa Lend me your bravery. I'm dreading the upcoming talk with my father-in-law where I explain that I don't want my child exposed to his racist/sexist/homophobic viewpoints. I still want him in this child's life, but I think he should be able to handle keeping certain things out of conversation/letting me as the parent answer whatever questions my kid has. All the dread. 

I struggle with this too. How do you teach your kid that what grandpa says is not true and that he is actually an ass? Dh

You have your DH tell them they are not allowed to speak hatred in front of your children. It really is that simple. They disobey and you put them on time out and take time away from them until they are ready to be mature adults. I put MIL on an indefinite time out over a year ago because I will not allow my son  to see his mother disrespected. Best thing I ever did, my life is so peaceful now.

noelietrex

Confession: DH bought a bathroom scale a week or so ago to weigh himself because he's been gaining pregnancy weight and he wants to turn it around. I'm too embarrassed to admit that I need us to get rid of it. I have too many body image issues that having a scale in the house is irresistible and I'm weighing myself daily or multiple times daily and it's not good for my mental health or the baby. I'm thinking about breaking it and blaming it on the dog because I don't want DH to see how much of a wreck I am in this area. I mean I respect myself less for tying my self-worth to a number on a scale and I know DH doesn't think of me like that. UGH can I blame barbies and Janet Jackson (I wanted to look like her in a crop top growing up)? Also how might a dog break a scale?

KASG

thebigoaktree said:

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

I find it laughable how democrats were criticizing republicans who stated they wanted to leave the country after Obama got elected and say how childish it was yada yada yet so many people now say it about trump. The pot is calling the kettle black! Also I'm a moderate so I don't strongly align to any party just to say. 

Does Trump count a serious candidate? However, I would move to Canada if he's elected. 

Yea, but the difference is they wanted to leave because Obama is black and they can't get over that. I'd wanna leave cuz Trump is stupid, no matter what color he is lol.

Anyway, it's a moot point because DH won't come with me!

DobbysSock

Nerdchild said:

My FFFC: I brought up not having my husband's friends come down for the birth (they had invited themselves and the boys get rowdy together, plus they would have to bring their 3 year old, too much for me right after birth). He gave me a lame 'they are my family too' and I went full preggo-zilla and told him while technically and legally this baby is half his, the birth experience is 100 percent mine and I had no legal obligation to even allow him into the birth room. I would never really keep him from experiencing the birth, but I felt I needed to make my point that I had already made up my mind and was just letting him know as a courtesy. I feel awful doing the whole 'my pregnancy, my rules' thing, but if it works it works. 

@Nerdchild totally valid. Birth and postpartum period are so precious and so fragile - it might seem unfair or harsh but our SO's just have to accept doing things our way during this brief window of time. You're actually saving your DH by being firm on this, because honestly if he didn't respect your wishes and ruined your post-partum period there's a chance you'd never be able to forgive that. I've heard of women completely losing all respect for their husbands and it causing irreparable damage to a relationship when they let inlaws or friends stomp all over their postpartum period and don't protect their SO when she's a new mom (you sound perfectly capable of protecting yourself, for the record, but sometimes it can surprise you how you react in the postpartum period. I know I wasn't able to advocate or speak up for myself in that time the way I normally can, so DH really had to be the strong one for me in terms of the outside world)

Y0urm0m

Lindsayleigh1989 said:

I find it laughable how democrats were criticizing republicans who stated they wanted to leave the country after Obama got elected and say how childish it was yada yada yet so many people now say it about trump. The pot is calling the kettle black! Also I'm a moderate so I don't strongly align to any party just to say. 

Wait I don't get it. So who are you voting for?

mnkenned

@KASG @Lindsayleigh1989
also because all of the conservatives said they would move to Canada, which is way more progressive and already has most of the things Obama wanted to do in place. At least dems would be moving to a place more in-line with their politics. 

I have dual citizenship and dh and I have already been considering moving back (this country is CRAY) and a Trump victory would seal the deal for sure.

Also - how do his supporters not realize he's just playing the crap out of them?! He's a master at playing to what people want to hear despite his record. I don't understand how the other candidates haven't called his bluff yet.

ninji15

noelietrex said:

Confession: DH bought a bathroom scale a week or so ago to weigh himself because he's been gaining pregnancy weight and he wants to turn it around. I'm too embarrassed to admit that I need us to get rid of it. I have too many body image issues that having a scale in the house is irresistible and I'm weighing myself daily or multiple times daily and it's not good for my mental health or the baby. I'm thinking about breaking it and blaming it on the dog because I don't want DH to see how much of a wreck I am in this area. I mean I respect myself less for tying my self-worth to a number on a scale and I know DH doesn't think of me like that. UGH can I blame barbies and Janet Jackson (I wanted to look like her in a crop top growing up)? Also how might a dog break a scale?

Why not just tell him to keep it out of your sight? Like, out of sight out of mind? I hate scales too. I make my DH keep ours in the garage, I don't ever go in there. Maybe have him keep it in his car even for now or at keep it somewhere at work if he can so he can still use it. Its important to be honest otherwise he may just buy another and or punish the dog for something it didn't do. Mine would anyways. lol 

thebigoaktree

https://www.deathandtaxesmag.com/271850/vermin-supreme-running-for-president-still-wants-to-give-everyone-a-pony/
I'm voting this guy, because it would be the New Hampshire thing to do, and I'd get a free pony.

Taymiller

Y0urm0m said:

Taymiller said:

Nerdchild said:

@chanfa Lend me your bravery. I'm dreading the upcoming talk with my father-in-law where I explain that I don't want my child exposed to his racist/sexist/homophobic viewpoints. I still want him in this child's life, but I think he should be able to handle keeping certain things out of conversation/letting me as the parent answer whatever questions my kid has. All the dread. 

I struggle with this too. How do you teach your kid that what grandpa says is not true and that he is actually an ass? Dh

You have your DH tell them they are not allowed to speak hatred in front of your children. It really is that simple. They disobey and you put them on time out and take time away from them until they are ready to be mature adults. I put MIL on an indefinite time out over a year ago because I will not allow my son  to see his mother disrespected. Best thing I ever did, my life is so peaceful now.

It is always a battle and I am always the bad guy. dh never sticks up for me, it drives me crazy. FIL is here for a week next week, pray for me.

noelietrex

ninji15 said:

noelietrex said:

Confession: DH bought a bathroom scale a week or so ago to weigh himself because he's been gaining pregnancy weight and he wants to turn it around. I'm too embarrassed to admit that I need us to get rid of it. I have too many body image issues that having a scale in the house is irresistible and I'm weighing myself daily or multiple times daily and it's not good for my mental health or the baby. I'm thinking about breaking it and blaming it on the dog because I don't want DH to see how much of a wreck I am in this area. I mean I respect myself less for tying my self-worth to a number on a scale and I know DH doesn't think of me like that. UGH can I blame barbies and Janet Jackson (I wanted to look like her in a crop top growing up)? Also how might a dog break a scale?

Why not just tell him to keep it out of your sight? Like, out of sight out of mind? I hate scales too. I make my DH keep ours in the garage, I don't ever go in there. Maybe have him keep it in his car even for now or at keep it somewhere at work if he can so he can still use it. Its important to be honest otherwise he may just buy another and or punish the dog for something it didn't do. Mine would anyways. lol 

Why do I tell you guys anything? You always just suggest acting like a reasonable adult. Ugh! You're right I just don't want him to think of me differently. I wish I could just have the will power to stay away from it. I may put it in the basement with his workout stuff and tell him I want to gain weight in peace. Maybe he'll get my drift and not make me talk about it. I'm a bad dog parent- I hadn't considered there could be consequences for the dog whoops!

DobbysSock

Nerdchild said:

@chanfa Lend me your bravery. I'm dreading the upcoming talk with my father-in-law where I explain that I don't want my child exposed to his racist/sexist/homophobic viewpoints. I still want him in this child's life, but I think he should be able to handle keeping certain things out of conversation/letting me as the parent answer whatever questions my kid has. All the dread. 

@Nerdchild depending on what the comments are, you might be able to deal with it as it comes up, instead of having a specific conversation (if you prefer). I mostly really like my FIL, but he comes from a family with some backwards views. For example he recently started talking about how he "doesn't get the whole transgender thing,  like Bruce Jenner" and said it makes him uncomfortable. DD was in the room. I basically just shared my opinion back (that our comfort doesn't really matter, and that CAITLYN Jenner lived 60 years of her life feeling uncomfortable in her own skin and now she's finally authentically being herself, and that her gender identity has literally zero effect on any of us so why would it make anyone feel uncomfortable?) He kind of got sheepish and agreed and changed the subject. This is my go-to with him and his extended family. I was raised that it's ok to respectfully disagree and debate, even with my parents/elders, while in DH's family this isn't the norm. The tide is turning though and I've noticed DH is speaking up a lot more, as is one of his cousins, to call out offensive views. FIL's comments have really decreased - whether that's because I'm getting through to him, because he doesn't want to risk offending me, or because he just doesn't want to be called out, I'm not sure. 

I guess my point is that while I would prefer DD not be exposed to these comments in the first place, I also feel that her watching me and DH respectfully disagree and explain our viewpoint on a subject, and stand up for a person who is being discriminated against (even just an abstract "celebrity" we don't know) is also a good lesson for her to learn. I believe that my FIL's comments are based more in ignorance as opposed to outright hate. While both are wrong, I feel like DD seeing ignorance (and seeing it being called out and addressed) as a young child is one thing, seeing hate is another. If FIL was making hateful comments as opposed to ignorant ones, I would absolutely have the more difficult conversation about what was acceptable to say in front of my child if he wants a relationship with her.

rakel88

mnkenned said:

I have dual citizenship and dh and I have already been considering moving back (this country is CRAY) and a Trump victory would seal the deal for sure.

This. Me, my husband, my parents and brother. We're out! Where I'm from isn't perfect by any means but it's better than Trump America for sure.

pourmeanothermocktail

My FFFC: When I'm having a truly basket case emotional day, it worries me that I'm going to bring a child into my life, because they have to deal with me as a parent - and makes me think I shouldn't be bringing a child into my world. Then, having THAT thought makes me feel guilty, because of COURSE I want this child. It's a vicious cycle. Most days are much better than that, but at the lowest of the low, I already feel sorry for this baby.

thebigoaktree

RideNRunMomma said:

My FFFC: When I'm having a truly basket case emotional day, it worries me that I'm going to bring a child into my life, because they have to deal with me as a parent - and makes me think I shouldn't be bringing a child into my world. Then, having THAT thought makes me feel guilty, because of COURSE I want this child. It's a vicious cycle. Most days are much better than that, but at the lowest of the low, I already feel sorry for this baby.

I feel this line of thought is pretty normal. Big deep breaths. 

quartz02

@thebigoaktree HOW HAVE I NOT HEARD OF THAT GUY BEFORE?!? LMAO!!! "Yes, I'm wearing guns today. It's not something I do every day but it seemed like a good day to do it." CLASSIC.

thebigoaktree

quartz02 said:

@thebigoaktree HOW HAVE I NOT HEARD OF THAT GUY BEFORE?!? LMAO!!! "Yes, I'm wearing guns today. It's not something I do every day but it seemed like a good day to do it." CLASSIC.

How would you not vote for someone that is for going back in time and killing baby Hitler?

jlgriff11

I am a socially liberal republican voting for Bernie in a house full of conservative republicans. Not that it's anybody's business, but since we're sharing. 

Imagine how hard it is to be a social liberal republican. It's hard, man.

kcossey528

I hate politics. When picking a candidate it usually comes down to: would I rather stab my eye with a fork or cut my foot off with a butter knife. I also can't stand when people bring up shit at gatherings knowing they are going to ruffle feathers. I don't care if you are left, right, or upside down, there are so many other topics of conversation, like amber rose and Kanye #fingersinthebootyassbitch

My FFFC: pregnancy and I don't get along. My husband is super pumped, ready to go buy every unnecessary baby item possible, but I'm not. Maybe it's all the issues I've had so far, but OB said I'm high risk for rupturing membranes before the 25 week mark. So once that passes, I'll probably get more excited and be ready to buy all the unnecessary baby crap we will never use.