FFFC

ButterMyBiscuit

I know I haven't been around much this week but give us your flame-free Friday confessions!

ButterMyBiscuit

I won't get into specifics because you never know who is on the site but I have a friend who is pregnant and I am terrified for her future child. She is completely unbalanced and her marriage could crumble at any moment. She married this man 30 years her senior just to spite her ex-boyfriend who was the love of her life. It's a hot mess situation and I don't even want to be around to see it.

dolewhipper

I don't like going above my supervisors head, but when I need to help my sister with her 3 week old while her H is on duty for 4 days straight, and she's showing signs of PPD, I'm fucking helping her and not coming into work. I had a feeling she would have a bit of PPD with her past history and had requested off work but it was denied last week (after I bought my plane tickets). I called my manager last night, crying hormonal self, saying that the supervisor was saying I couldn't go because she couldn't find coverage for my shifts. She's very understanding with family maters and told me not to think twice and go. My supervisor is going to be pissed when I get back.
This is the only time her H will be gone that long, so I don't think I'll need to come back, plus they're moving back to FL in 4 weeks anyways where extended family can help out a lot.

MamaBish

Warning: I'm a bit of a Debbie downer today so take this with a grain of salt and know that this is based on multiple people on Tb and irl, not one single poster.

I am getting really annoyed with complaints about regular pregnancy things that aren't even painful or uncomfortable. Oh, you've "already" gained 10 pounds? Who cares?? You are making a baby! It doesn't freaking matter! Sure, it's probably not good if you have already gained 50 pounds (Gestational diabetes is real) but seriously, the important thing is that baby is ok.

Nerdchild

@MamaBish Thank you! That leads me to my FFFC; I'm not listening to my o.b.: I gained six pounds since first getting pregnant (so, six lbs in the first trimester, as I'm 15 weeks), and was not large to start with, but my doc told me to 'slow down on the weight gain' and asked what my 'pre-pregnancy weight' was. I gave him a snappy 'healthy me or anorexic me, doc, because that's a difference of nearly 50 pounds!'. Not to mention, he told me I should gain 30 lbs with this pregnancy. Why is 6 lbs in 15 weeks so worrisome?
I already eat well (whole grains, salads, fruits, lean proteins), and while the first trimester kept me from the intense plyometric workouts I used to do, I'm starting to pick up light cardio and resistance training as I no longer feel like death. No, I don't think I will be 'dieting' during this pregnancy, that's a dangerous road for me.

Eta: Because of my e.d. I stopped using my scale ages ago. I go by 'do my clothes fit' and guess what, doc, besides hiking my pants down and inch to be more comfortable and wearing maternity tights that don't cut across the top of my expanding uterus, I'm still wearing all of my normal clothes and they fit just fine.

At least his comment made me healthy me annoyed, because anorexic me didn't even pipe in with a comment. That skinny b**** can stay in the dog kennel I locked her in.

born2run911

@Nerdchild wtf I think 6lbs is pretty reasonable. I have gained the same and my doc was happy with that. Last time around I had gained almost 15 by now due to eating shitty and only craving terrible foods. This time I have been proud of myself for eating better and only gaining 6lbs by 15 weeks. My male doctor last pregnancy gave me a warning on how hard it can be to lose pregnancy weight---how would you know, you've never been pregnant?

mandyjulie

@Nerdchild You're awesome.



Keep on ignoring him on this one. For any of us, six pounds IS NOT a big deal. Also, if you're counting from first getting pregnant, some of that weight could well be your bigger boobs, plus water weight/bloat. Regardless, he really shouldn't be pushing you to worry about it if he knows your history (and it sounds like you told him today if he didn't already know). Screw him and keep that skinny bitch in a corner!

thebigoaktree

Well @Nerdchild your dr. would hate me. Since my bloat has went away I lost about 5-6lbs and am back down to pre-pregnancy weight. I asked my dr. if I wasn't gaining fast enough and she said I was fine, that to start watching it more later on in the 2nd. 

Taymiller

dolewhipper said:

I don't like going above my supervisors head, but when I need to help my sister with her 3 week old while her H is on duty for 4 days straight, and she's showing signs of PPD, I'm fucking helping her and not coming into work. I had a feeling she would have a bit of PPD with her past history and had requested off work but it was denied last week (after I bought my plane tickets). I called my manager last night, crying hormonal self, saying that the supervisor was saying I couldn't go because she couldn't find coverage for my shifts. She's very understanding with family maters and told me not to think twice and go. My supervisor is going to be pissed when I get back.
This is the only time her H will be gone that long, so I don't think I'll need to come back, plus they're moving back to FL in 4 weeks anyways where extended family can help out a lot.

I am glad you went to your manager. PPD is not something to fuck around with. I am glad you are helping your sister.

Taymiller

I gained 40 with my first and will probably again. I try not to worry too much about it. I am the same weight I was with my first so yea not going to worry about it.

TattoosandLace

@Nerdchild you just took the 6 pounds I lost. Your dr can eff off

ButterMyBiscuit

@nerdchild I just wanted to tell you that 6 pounds is no big deal. I can gain anywhere from 2-6 pounds a DAY just from bloat. If I eat a lot of salt, the scale reflects it. Weight fluctuates by the moment. Tell him to stick a finger in his poop hole.

ETA: I meant I can weigh myself in the AM and by the evening, I can be 2-6 pounds heavier. By the next day, it's gone.

stillcozy

@Nerdchild focus on being healthy and ignore stupid advice! 6lbs is nothing so he needs to shove it! You are doing exactly what you need to be doing !

soberkfell

My FFFC is pretty lame... I've started bringing my journal to work and writing in it during the day. It's not work, but I'm bored and don't have anything to do. At least when I'm journaling it looks like I'm doing something, and I feel less bad doing that than surfing TB and swap & sell sites all day!

ButterMyBiscuit

soberkfell said:

My FFFC is pretty lame... I've started bringing my journal to work and writing in it during the day. It's not work, but I'm bored and don't have anything to do. At least when I'm journaling it looks like I'm doing something, and I feel less bad doing that than surfing TB and swap & sell sites all day!

SUDOKU! But really, that will be really fun to look back at after baby is born.

PugsandKisses

MamaBish said:

Warning: I'm a bit of a Debbie downer today so take this with a grain of salt and know that this is based on multiple people on Tb and irl, not one single poster.

I am getting really annoyed with complaints about regular pregnancy things that aren't even painful or uncomfortable. Oh, you've "already" gained 10 pounds? Who cares?? You are making a baby! It doesn't freaking matter! Sure, it's probably not good if you have already gained 50 pounds (Gestational diabetes is real) but seriously, the important thing is that baby is ok.

Yep. This.

Also, I am letting everyone know, I will judge the crap out of you if you try any at home inductions methods prior to 40 weeks.
I know, being 9 months pregnant sucks. Guess you, you signed up for it. You can bitch and complain, that is ok. But if you ask about starting labor at 36, 37, 38 or 39 weeks, I will call you a selfish brat. Those last few weeks are important to baby's growth.

This is not for people will medical needs and what not. This is for social inductions or just the ones who is tired of being pregnant.

Singingmama10

@Nerdchild Ugh!! your Dr. can go screw himself... 6 lbs it totally normal at 15 weeks
@ButterMyBiscuit I'm in a similar situation with one of my friends(actually my longest lasting friendship).  It's hard not to be judgmental when the problems she complains about were totally her doing.   

My FFFC I am still addicted to candy crush and play it obsessively 

Nerdchild

@PugsandKisses Those make me laugh. If hot foods brought on labor this kid would have been born two months ago when I was eating my weight in jalapeños.

I've also read that the only method with scientific data to back it up is nipple stimulation. If my third trimester nips feels anything like they do now, no one is touching my nipples. True story, my 6-7 week prenatal appt. my doc felt my breasts as part of the routine exam and I hollered, sat up, and shoved his hands off. My husband looked terrified at my outburst.

mandyjulie

PugsandKisses said:

Warning: I'm a bit of a Debbie downer today so take this with a grain of salt and know that this is based on multiple people on Tb and irl, not one single poster. I am getting really annoyed with complaints about regular pregnancy things that aren't even painful or uncomfortable. Oh, you've "already" gained 10 pounds? Who cares?? You are making a baby! It doesn't freaking matter! Sure, it's probably not good if you have already gained 50 pounds (Gestational diabetes is real) but seriously, the important thing is that baby is ok.

Yep. This. Also, I am letting everyone know, I will judge the crap out of you if you try any at home inductions methods prior to 40 weeks. I know, being 9 months pregnant sucks. Guess you, you signed up for it. You can bitch and complain, that is ok. But if you ask about starting labor at 36, 37, 38 or 39 weeks, I will call you a selfish brat. Those last few weeks are important to baby's growth. This is not for people will medical needs and what not. This is for social inductions or just the ones who is tired of being pregnant.

Yes, @PugsandKisses, I will flip my shit as well. I had to be induced a little over a week early last time (well, I didn't HAVE TO, my doctors were being cautious), and I was bitter at the people trying to force themselves into labor! Yes, it's uncomfortable, I get that. But it's just a couple of weeks.

TBH, and I know not all agree with this description, but things are also going to be uncomfortable once your baby gets here. Because then you're doing things like applying nipple cream to sore BF-ing boobs, hardly even sleeping, crying from hormones or possibly from PPD, icing/sitz-bathing your crotch or recovering from a c-section, worrying about your kid's weight, dealing with colic and other such fun... the list goes on.

Not to say there aren't many beautiful and amazing things that will happen once baby's here, of course. But is it "comfortable" after you have the baby? NO. I wouldn't say so.

PinkLady2015

FFFC: I've gotten 4 Target gift bags so far for signing up for the registry and contemplating getting more... (Vegas has 15+ Targets)

MotherOfDucks

Also, I am letting everyone know, I will judge the crap out of you if you try any at home inductions methods prior to 40 weeks.
I know, being 9 months pregnant sucks. Guess you, you signed up for it. You can bitch and complain, that is ok. But if you ask about starting labor at 36, 37, 38 or 39 weeks, I will call you a selfish brat. Those last few weeks are important to baby's growth.

This is not for people will medical needs and what not. This is for social inductions or just the ones who is tired of being pregnant.

Omg. Yes. This KILLS me. Be grateful. I've NEVER made it to 40 weeks. After I had my first, I couldn't watch TLC because they'd have mothers of sextuplets who made it farther along than I did and I'd be all sorts of angry and jealous. Be happy your shit works and the baby stays in there the whole time like it's supposed to. It's not "cute" to have a micropreemie. Or a preemie. It's like having your heart ripped out of your body to walk out of that hospital alone, while your baby uses machines to breathe. If you rush your baby, this could be you. Each baby develops at their own speed. Occasionally their lungs aren't mature at 36 weeks yet. Etc.

Brittnic531

Mild FFFC: I am currently reading the Outlander series and I am so disappointed in the TV series.  I know that Diana consulted with it, but Jamie and Claire are nothing like I imagined (I also don't think the character playing Jamie is hot at all).  That being said, I will still watch every single episode of every season.  

PugsandKisses

PinkLady2015 said:

FFFC: I've gotten 4 Target gift bags so far for signing up for the registry and contemplating getting more... (Vegas has 15+ Targets)

What's in them?

quartz02

@PugsandKisses @mandyjulie Amen! coming from a mama that went overdue, which, by the way,  is also just an estimate! I don't know exactly when I became pregnant and some people naturally have longer or shorter pregnancies. *pet peeve* I will say my anticipation for the end of pregnancy was more excited to meet the baby (Team Green) than to end personal discomfort.

I never knew tired until I had a baby. Or frustration/pain until breastfeeding. (stick with it, the pain is relatively short-lived!)

ButterMyBiscuit

Maybe this is just me but there are a lot of things that are uncomfortable about pregnancy. We've all been bitching about the first trimester but we're not allowed to bitch about the rest? Yeah, constant whining is not allowed but if I'm uncomfortable and I want to let it out on this board, I'm going to do that. I don't do it on social media nor do I do it in person with anyone else because I know they don't give a shit. This place is my outlet.

I do agree that the crazy wives tales about inducing labor are ridiculous. Babies come when they want to come or a doctor forces them out.

MotherOfDucks

I think complaining is fine. I complained SO MUCH when I hit 35 weeks with my last one. Haha. I finally understood that the 3rd trimester is awful. And painful. And the baby has taken over your whole body. I think there is just no need to overreact to normal stuff like "I got a stretch mark" or to try to induce labor because you're uncomfortable. Pregnancy is uncomfortable. You just have to stick it out. Whine as much as you'd like. As long as you're not trying to drink castor oil.

Singingmama10

Yep.... babies don't care about the wives tales.  I did a few of them once I reached 40 weeks (pineapple, hot food, sex, nipple stimulation) yeah a week later he still didn't come and I was only a half centimeter dilated.  I ended up being induced because of high blood pressure.... If I end up being a week (or more) overdue again please be ready for the complaining because that was NOT fun! 

mandyjulie

ButterMyBiscuit said:

Maybe this is just me but there are a lot of things that are uncomfortable about pregnancy. We've all been bitching about the first trimester but we're not allowed to bitch about the rest? Yeah, constant whining is not allowed but if I'm uncomfortable and I want to let it out on this board, I'm going to do that. I don't do it on social media nor do I do it in person with anyone else because I know they don't give a shit. This place is my outlet.

I do agree that the crazy wives tales about inducing labor are ridiculous. Babies come when they want to come or a doctor forces them out.

I think the original FFFC on this said she's sick of people whining about "regular pregnancy things that aren't even painful" like "gaining 10 pounds already." I didn't see anyone saying we can't all whine about the uncomfortable and actual shitty stuff. 

I expect to whine more as we approach July than I did last time approaching DD's January due date. With the heat and humidity where I live in the summer, I'm going to be a swollen whale.

blackgirlmagic

I agree with the weight gain. I already have body issue from being over weight, but my doctor told me that she does not want me to gain no more than 11-20 pounds. I feel like that is nothing in the long run. I have seen charts, not sure if they are true or not, but the average weight gain of a pregnancy is 30 pounds. Just because I have some extra lovin' does not mean I should gain less. Do I randomly have fat disappearing throughout my pregnancy that is being replaced with baby things, I don't think so. That is what is wrong with America, they are too focus on body image and not worrying about the health.  But if I am eating all the right foods, staying healthy and active and I just so happen to gain more than 20 pounds then why should I feel bad for myself? That just makes me think that my body is not doing something right. 

ButterMyBiscuit

mandyjulie said:

ButterMyBiscuit said:

Maybe this is just me but there are a lot of things that are uncomfortable about pregnancy. We've all been bitching about the first trimester but we're not allowed to bitch about the rest? Yeah, constant whining is not allowed but if I'm uncomfortable and I want to let it out on this board, I'm going to do that. I don't do it on social media nor do I do it in person with anyone else because I know they don't give a shit. This place is my outlet.

I do agree that the crazy wives tales about inducing labor are ridiculous. Babies come when they want to come or a doctor forces them out.

I think the original FFFC on this said she's sick of people whining about "regular pregnancy things that aren't even painful" like "gaining 10 pounds already." I didn't see anyone saying we can't all whine about the uncomfortable and actual shitty stuff. 

I expect to whine more as we approach July than I did last time approaching DD's January due date. With the heat and humidity where I live in the summer, I'm going to be a swollen whale.

Maybe so but we can't regulate what people complain about nor does everyone agree on what is or isn't painful in pregnancy.

ETA: It's FFFC so whatever. I don't even care enough to argue about it.

noelietrex

Brittnic531 said:

Mild FFFC: I am currently reading the Outlander series and I am so disappointed in the TV series.  I know that Diana consulted with it, but Jamie and Claire are nothing like I imagined (I also don't think the character playing Jamie is hot at all).  That being said, I will still watch every single episode of every season.  

Also mild one: I work for the channel that produces this show and I LOVE when people talk about how awful our shows are. (My job basically revolves around promoting these shows and trying to find their redeeming qualities.) Everyone knows all of our originals suck- it's kind of a running joke here.

quartz02

@BeachTigress I'm not overweight but I would have the exact same mindset if I were in your shoes.

soberkfell

FFFC #2 - I don't care if the names I like are in the top 10, 20, 100... if H and I like the name, that's what he or she will be called. Jackson has been the #1 boys' name for the past two years... didn't stop me from naming DS Jackson. I've loved that name since I was 16. None of the 13 Katies in my class growing up seemed to care that there were 12 other girls that shared the same name.

PhoebeJune1984

I hate that my mom now knows about the pregnancy. We felt obligated to tell her, because we wanted to tell DD, and we knew that DD would slip on the day that she hangs out with my mom. I would have loved it, if we could have told DD and knew that she wouldn't have said anything, and waited longer to tell my side of the family. My mom is already hounding me (in a snarky way), about the fact that she wants to start telling people....these people are people that I am not ready for them to know. She wont listen to the reasons why we don't want a ton of people knowing right now, and keeps getting snarkier and snarkier about asking to tell people.

My older sister is pissed off at me because my due date is right between my brother's wedding, and her wedding. She thinks that I am trying to steal her thunder. Dude lady, this is your third marriage......promise I won't have a baby before your fourth one. We always knew that if we had another kid, we would try in fall 2015. That was the plan for three years. What we didn't know was that both my brother and sister were going to get engaged and plan their weddings a month apart, in the summer that I would be due. Are we going to change our family plans for two days out of the whole year, absolutely not. It annoys the hell out of me that she complains about it behind my back, to other people, but doesn't have the balls to say it to my face. Especially given the fact, that she begged us for the past three years, to have another kid. My younger brother and his fiance, are totally excited though, and don't give a care that my due date is so close to their wedding. 

born2run911

@PhoebeJune1984 I really really really don't get why people insist on sharing your news. Some people just get such a satisfaction from spreading news about other people. It makes me so ragey, I feel like I've barely told anyone I'm pregnant, and everyone knows. Some people I insisted on not telling myself because they have such big mouths were actually mad I didn't tell them myself, and then proceeded to tell everyone they saw.

PinkLady2015

PugsandKisses said:

FFFC: I've gotten 4 Target gift bags so far for signing up for the registry and contemplating getting more... (Vegas has 15+ Targets)

What's in them?

Going from memory (although I think @Lindsayleigh1989 posted a pic of hers?)

But it comes in a cute reusable grey chevron bag: a pacifier (I wanna say its NUk, but it could be mam); an Avent bottle, a diaper w/wipes in satin-like bag, samples of diaper cream, laundry detergent, shampoo, and coupons for diapers, wipes etc.

PhoebeJune1984

@born2run911 Its totally frustrating. I haven't even told 90% of my friends. MH has only told one friend, and that is because his friend flew up here and is staying with us for the week. His parents are the only family members on his side that know. My mom is already informing me of which people I need to call and inform, and complaining that it isn't far that those people don't know yet.....like my uncle, who I am not even close to and have no real relationships with. I will tell him, I just find no need to be in some rush about it or go out of my way. The people I want to tell, are the people that I am close to, and I am not even ready to tell them yet! I know one of the main reasons she is putting so much pressure on me, is because she is getting together with her friends on Sunday (as a big group), and she wants to tell all of them. But they are getting together for her friends retirement party, and I feel like she should focus on that, and not be making announcements on the fact that she is going to be a grandma again. And ALL of the ladies in this group, are the town gossips. We grew up in a small town, where everyone knew everyone, and once these ladies know, their kids (who are my age) will know. And I don't care to have them knowing. 

born2run911

@PhoebeJune1984 I'm sure you already specifically told her not to say anything then! I would definitely be making her swear up and down haha

PhoebeJune1984

@born2run911 Oh I have told her over and over that we don't want her saying anything. But she doesn't want to listen to the reasons that we don't want anyone knowing, so she just keeps trying to convince me to let her spill the beans, in snarky ways. 

My MIL was so much easier to deal with when it came to this. If we ask her not to say anything, she doesn't, and never questions us on our reasonings. My IL's have known since Thanksgiving, and haven't uttered a word, nor have either of them asked when they can talk about it openly. 

magzor

@Brittnic531 @noelietrex I watched the first season before I read the first book (and will admit whenever there is a book turned tv series/movie, I usually enjoy whatever I read/saw first more) and I LOVED the first season.  I felt like they did a pretty great job of condensing such a long book into a few episodes.  My husband and I did watch the marathon I think last weekend and I was then able to point out "Oh, that didn't happen in the book." and "Where did the scene from the book go?!" 

I just borrowed the second book from a cousin, and I've heard that the second season is going to stray pretty far, so I'm nervous!

As for Sam Heughan, I find him EXTREMELY attractive as Jamie, but not quite as much in real life!  And it also helps that I saw the series first, so as I was reading the books, I imagined Sam as Jamie.  But that accent.  And the way he says "Sassenach."  Swoon! 

quartz02

@marowan agree totally. Love him way better as "Jamie". However, he seems like a really nice guy IRL (different philanthropies/causes) so that makes up for the fact that he isn't, in fact, Jamie Fraser. LOL!

ETA: without mentioning spoilers, I think the changes in the show were to make it more viewer-friendly and condensed for the right amount of episodes.