When you wake up in the middle of the night unable to fall back asleep. So you go to the kitchen, mix up a batch of banana nut chocolate chip muffins, pop them in the oven, relax in the recliner while they bake, and promptly fall asleep. Then you wake up to see the oven timer had gone off 10 minutes ago. The muffins end up quite crispy but you eat 4 anyway with a giant glass of milk.
These are all so funny, and so true! I have asthma on top of already not being able to breathe, so every time I make a sighing sound my bf thinks I'm mad at him. I'm not mad I just can't breathe. And a lot of the public bathroom stalls in my city are made so small I can barely even get into them, so I end up using the big handicap stall, and I don't feel bad. Also after reading @TheEA comment I really want muffins
These are all so funny, and so true! I have asthma on top of already not being able to breathe, so every time I make a sighing sound my bf thinks I'm mad at him. I'm not mad I just can't breathe. And a lot of the public bathroom stalls in my city are made so small I can barely even get into them, so I end up using the big handicap stall, and I don't feel bad. Also after reading @TheEA comment I really want muffins
I always use the handicapped stall. I close the door on my bump otherwise!
When you FTFO over things not being clean, and put away, but it's so exhausting to unload the dishwasher. Bending over is not just annoying-- it kind of hurts!
I'm walking around with my left leg unshaved and my right completely smooth.. Because I have such bad sciatic and back pain I can't bend to the left and DH wasn't home when I showered to help me
When the thought of pants makes you want to cry. I have worn dresses every day this week. I told my coworkers to expect a constant rotation of the same dresses for the next 5 weeks or so because I cannot and will not wear pants.
1. Even the maternity pants feel too tight. 2. Attempting sex to speed up this going into labor nonsense isn't even possible because you're too winded and he can't move around the bump. 3. When you drop your mascara halfway through doing your makeup and taking all of it off and going without makeup is easier than just bending over to pick up the tube
You feel bad, but at the same time, you don't feel bad - for delaying feeding the cats until as late as possible cause you just don't want to bend over to pick up their bowls
Even your maternity pants have given up on you, baby is trying to kick her way out through the belly button or punch her way through the appropriate exit, and everything is taxing. Everything. I can't wait wait to meet her!!!
This all makes me laugh. Can relate to no shirts fitting, cannot ties tennis shoes for a walk, rolling over in bed and getting up from the couch without help. I have 4 1/2 weeks left too and everyone says how small I look. Sure don't feel it!
Me too! Everyone says I'm so small also for having 2.5 to go!
I was laying on DH's chest in bed and he asked me to move so he could get up to go to the bathroom. He almost didn't make it because it took so long for me to roll off, and he was laughing so hard at me "like a turtle on its back!"
When you are eerily ok with the idea of your water breaking in a public place (and try to get out into the world as much as possible even thought you're a huge uncomfortable mess) because that would mean it's the real deal...
When you are eerily ok with the idea of your water breaking in a public place (and try to get out into the world as much as possible even thought you're a huge uncomfortable mess) because that would mean it's the real deal...
When you are eerily ok with the idea of your water breaking in a public place (and try to get out into the world as much as possible even thought you're a huge uncomfortable mess) because that would mean it's the real deal...
Cuz it's better than messing up your own couch?
Indeed. Annnnd it's much more likely to happen if you've placed yourself in an embarrassing situation.... Obviously. Babies know these things.
When your parents decide to surprise you with a visit and your father ends up doing more work in the kitchen then you do when your father barely does anything in the kitchen to begin with.
When family/friends start texting daily about the condition of your cervix, and you know they mean well and are excited but you want to scream "you asking isn't making this wait any easier!"
...when you have a coughing fit in public and rush to sit down, because you might pee your pants... Causing pandemonium around you because you're a 9 month pregnant lady rushing to sit down. But you're too embarrassed to admit it was just the pants peeing fear, and everything else is really fine... So you accept the water offered and sit for a few minutes because it feels nice to take a load off.
When family/friends start texting daily about the condition of your cervix, and you know they mean well and are excited but you want to scream "you asking isn't making this wait any easier!"
For some reason people asking about my cervix creeps me out.
When you have been dutifully avoiding deli meat for 8 and a half months and finally decide, f*** it, I'm having a turkey sandwich.
My doctor has let me have 1 a week the whole pregnancy. I love him for that. My F it moment is that I'm having a non well done steak at our anniversary dinner in 2 weeks!
...when you have a coughing fit in public and rush to sit down, because you might pee your pants... Causing pandemonium around you because you're a 9 month pregnant lady rushing to sit down. But you're too embarrassed to admit it was just the pants peeing fear, and everything else is really fine... So you accept the water offered and sit for a few minutes because it feels nice to take a load off.
I read this to my DH and he was laughing, laughing. I think he was imagining me trying not to pee my pants. He's the type who would make sure I was OK, then hang back and watch the crowd swarm.
When you start bawling thinking about how tired you are and how much you have to do with DS1, and are totally overwhelmed by the thought of adding a new little one to the mix! Can't help but admit that I'm not ready! But ready or not...
Re: You know you are almost there, when...
I have asthma on top of already not being able to breathe, so every time I make a sighing sound my bf thinks I'm mad at him. I'm not mad I just can't breathe.
And a lot of the public bathroom stalls in my city are made so small I can barely even get into them, so I end up using the big handicap stall, and I don't feel bad.
Also after reading @TheEA comment I really want muffins
Bonus: arm muscles?
2. Attempting sex to speed up this going into labor nonsense isn't even possible because you're too winded and he can't move around the bump.
3. When you drop your mascara halfway through doing your makeup and taking all of it off and going without makeup is easier than just bending over to pick up the tube
Indeed. Annnnd it's much more likely to happen if you've placed yourself in an embarrassing situation.... Obviously. Babies know these things.